Not all sexists are misogynists. Please discuss.

[LAS14]

I've been noticing this over the last few years. Men whom no one would accuse of being misogynists fall into sexist judgments once they have developed a negative opinion of an individual woman, for whatever reason. They would never not hire or not promote a woman. They are all for equality in all arenas. But if a woman is judged to be "bad" for some reason, which would apply equally to a man, then I begin to hear comments about "shrillness." I notice that no matter what she says or does, there's something wrong. In other words, once categorized as not worthy, she can't win for losing. I don't see the same blanket attitudes directed toward men who are similarly categorized as "bad."

Does this ring a bell?

[bettyellen]

1. Its misogyny to hate women for their competence and strength, while

Thinking you love and respect them for being always agreeable, attractive or compliant. That’s hollow and selfish and not appreciating the humanity of the woman. Yet lots of people make that mistake. If it’s a “type” of woman they don’t like- it’s one that displays any self determination.

[Iggo]

4. It's misogyny to hate women because they're women.

[bettyellen]

5. My point being - some think theyre off the hook becasue they live subservient women.

But I’m guessing you knew that you don’t have to hate “all women” to be a misogynist.

[Iggo]

7. One-at-a-time hate is misogyny, too.

[ProudLib72]

2. Are you saying gendered negative language has some sort of feedback effect

Or are you saying that it somehow becomes ok in our current culture to use gendered negative language to describe a woman once she has done something wrong?

I don't know if I agree with your second premise that men don't encounter the same blanket attitudes. Maybe you're right, but it's not my experience. Perhaps I'm just not attuned to the discrepancies.

[Orsino]

3. Sure sounds like misogyny...

...no matter how loudly such people might claim to support equality.

[left-of-center2012]

6. Stirring the pot?

[dawg]

8. I have sexist tendencies. I'm not a misogynist.

The tendencies I'm referring to generally involve what is referred to as "benevolent" sexism. (And no, that isn't about holding doors.)

I tend to be more protective of females than males. In some respects, my expectations of them are lower. And while I used to think this was just part of being a good "Southern gentleman", I now realize how even this well-meaning form of sexism can be harmful.

For the most part, I now try to treat everyone the same regardless of gender. But I'd be lying if I told you I didn't sometimes catch myself falling back into those same old patterns I was taught in my childhood.