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Initech

(100,060 posts)
Wed Apr 11, 2018, 05:02 PM Apr 2018

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #4-13: Lawyer-Ception: A Trial Within A Trial Edition


Top 10 Conservative Idiots #4-13: Lawyer-Ception: A Trial Within A Trial Edition

Welcome back to the Top 10 Conservative Idiots! Sign up for the new Top 10 Visa Signature Card and get 15% cash back on all purchases and low APR financing, plus double airline miles! So I want to start by talking about professional golf. I usually don’t talk about professional golf. But I love this story. So the Masters tournament happened in Augusta, Georgia this weekend. I have no idea who won, I don’t really care. So the Budweiser commercial and their semi-annoying nonsense catch phrase “Dilly Dilly” got banned from the Masters tournament. Yes if you say “Dilly Dilly” during the tournament, you will get an ejection. Yes, as in an immediate, go directly to jail, do not pass go, do not collect $200 ejection. So the organizers of the Masters tournament handed down that moratorium. But the response from Anheuser-Busch was classic. Can we throw that tweet up there?




Bud Light even went so far as to have hats and t-shirts made, because apparently not having a “Dilly Dilly” presence at the Masters, made Bud Light really want to have a “Dilly Dilly” presence at the Masters. So hats and t-shirts were made and distributed for the prestigious event. But alas, guess what happened? That Dilly Dilly ban, as the guy who we currently call “president” says, fake news! yup – the whole thing was erroneously reported! Thank you sound effects guy! Man I never thought I would see the day when my sound effects guy was funnier than I am. OK enough of the intro – we have a lot of idiocy to get to. But first – John Oliver is back and he exposes the seedy underbelly behind faith-based “Crisis Pregnancy Centers”:

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Taking the first slot is another edition of The Trumper Games! Happy Trumper Games! Yes – another tribute has been eliminated – Trump’s own lawyer Michael Cohen! In the second slot this week of course is Donald J. Trump (2) . So by now you know that Trump sent troops to the Mexican border, because, reasons. In the third slot this week is the Alt Right (3). Apparently they are ramping up their quest to out rampant satanic pedophilia, whatever that is. In the number 4 slot, is Gun Nut Apologists (4) who are ramping up their quest to harass and humiliate Parkland student David Hogg - to the point where they are flat out stalking him. In the #5 slot we’ve got a new installment of Top 10 Investigates, and this time we’re going to Los Angeles, and we’re going to investigate what is up with the Waze app. Yes – Waze apparently doesn’t know road conditions and it can get you in serious trouble. In the number 6 slot is our weekly sermon of all things holy, Holy Shit, and this week, our resident pastor is going to educate you on how to elect a “godly” candidate because , Jesus. In the number 7 slot we’ve got a new installment of “This Fucking Guy”, only this week, it’s “This Fucking Gal” and that is batshit crazy racist Infowars and Project Veritas contributor Laura Loomer (7), and whew, she crazy. And speaking of Infowars, it’s been a while since we checked in with our old buddy Alex Jones (8) and man is he losing it big time. In the number 9 (NEIN!!!) slot this week is a new installment of “People Are Dumb” because, well, people are dumb. Finally this week it’s Round 1 Week 4 of our Stupidest State contest and this time we’re live from the home of the Los Angeles Chargers at Stub Hub Center, and this time Virginia takes on the champs, Texas in a battle of the batshit, while newcomers Utah and Missouri duke it out for Family Values superiority! And to cap it off we’re beginning our month long celebration of all things punk rock, and we have a live performance for you from the legendary Suicidal Tendencies! And as always don’t forget the key!

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[font size="8"]The Trumper Games: Mockingtrump Pt. 2
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Another firing, another week for the Trumper Games! Wait a minute… you mean to tell me that Michael Cohen wasn’t fired? Charlie!!!! Get me my producer! And bring me the good champagne again, why must I keep getting the cheap shit? But this week – the president’s own lawyer – Michael Cohen – was eliminated from the contest known as the Trumper Games! And this was no ordinary arrest either – we’re talking about the presidents’ own attorney!

WASHINGTON — The F.B.I. raided the Rockefeller Center office and Park Avenue hotel room of President Trump’s longtime personal lawyer, Michael D. Cohen, on Monday morning, seizing business records, emails and documents related to several topics, including a payment to a pornographic film actress.

Mr. Trump, in an extraordinarily angry response, lashed out hours later at what a person briefed on the matter said was an investigation into possible bank fraud by Mr. Cohen. Mr. Trump accused his own Justice Department of perpetrating a “witch hunt” and asserted that the F.B.I. “broke in to” Mr. Cohen’s office.

The president, who spoke at the White House before meeting with senior military commanders about a potential missile strike on Syria, called the F.B.I. raid a “disgraceful situation” and an “attack on our country in a true sense.”

It is not clear how the F.B.I. entered Mr. Cohen’s office, but agents had a search warrant and typically would have presented it to office personnel to be let in. The documents identified in the warrant date back years, according to a person briefed on the search
https://www.nytimes.com/2018/04/09/us/politics/fbi-raids-office-of-trumps-longtime-lawyer-michael-cohen.html




Oh that’s fierce! But alas – who connected to the president isn’t a shady criminal? We honestly have no idea. So now Tribute Cohen – who was from the 7th district – has been eliminated. The president’s own lawyers have their own lawyers! It’s Lawyer-ception! It's a trial within a trial within a trial! Where does it end and where does it begin?

The FBI raid against Michael Cohen spiked President Donald Trump's rampant indignation over the Robert Mueller probe to previously unseen heights, multiplying the persecution complex he feels about the FBI and his own Justice Department and fueling his sense he's the target of a witch hunt.

And it suggests that Cohen, who paid off adult film star Stormy Daniels, could be a bridge between the two separate legal strands threatening Trump.

"There is no way that they are looking for things that don't connect to the President in some way," Anne Milgram, a former New Jersey attorney general told CNN's Anderson Cooper of the Cohen raid. "It really is an unbelievable day when you start to think about what is happening, what we are going to see next."

Trump's rage continued into Tuesday morning, when he tweeted that "Attorney--client privilege is dead!" and referred to a "A TOTAL WITCH HUNT!!!," his preferred moniker for Mueller's investigation.
https://www.cnn.com/2018/04/10/politics/michael-cohen-donald-trump-white-house/index.html




So now the president’s lawyers have their own lawyers! Who probably also have their own lawyers – I mean who knows how many layers this thing has? What’s real and what isn’t? Even we don’t know! And of course the president is angry all right! I mean he had to remind us of what it’s all about.




Yes it’s a witch hunt! Or…. Is it? I mean if you were to ask the president directly it is an ordeal orchestrated by the other side! But in reality… he failed to read beyond the headline or the first paragraph like most fans of the president’s favorite news network.

The Department of Justice had to go to extraordinary lengths in order to carry out the raid on President Donald Trump's personal lawyer Michael Cohen.

And the lengths to which the Justice Department went show just how big of a deal the raid is, and, as experts said, how it is such "bad news" for Cohen.

On Monday, the FBI raided Cohen's Manhattan office, his home, and his hotel room, as The New York Times, Wall Street Journal, and Vanity Fair reported. The FBI was apparently acting on a referral from the special counsel Robert Mueller.

The agency took records related to several topics, including the $130,000 hush-money payment to adult-film star Stormy Daniels just before the 2016 presidential election, The Times reported. Federal prosecutors obtained a search warrant after Mueller sent a referral, said Cohen's lawyer, Stephen Ryan.

The Washington Post reported that Cohen was under investigation for possible bank fraud and violations of election law. Meanwhile, The Times wrote that the raid did not appear to be directly connected to Mueller's probe into Russian interference in the 2016 presidential election, but that the information he provided was likely uncovered as part of his investigation.
http://www.businessinsider.com/michael-cohen-justice-department-raid-on-trump-lawyer-2018-4




Yes… anything goes at this point, apparently! Mmmm… yes…. Mmmm…. Yes. Mmmmm… yes. So how does anything go? I mean how deep does this probe go? Not quite that deep, sir! We will keep an eye on this story, but for now, consider Tribute Cohen… eliminated!

Here’s what we don’t know: We don’t know specifically what the FBI was looking for when it raided the office of Michael Cohen, high-profile attorney for the Trump Organization. We don’t know what they found; we don’t know what investigations might be bolstered or curtailed by the evidence they seized.

What we do know, though, is interesting enough. The raid, which covered Cohen’s office and, according to the Wall Street Journal, his home and a Manhattan hotel room, included the seizure of information about the payment made to porn star Stormy Daniels shortly before the 2016 election and it included communications between Cohen and President Trump — meaning it included communication between an attorney and his client.

That last point also means that the bar for obtaining a warrant was higher than normal.

An attorney for Cohen told The Washington Post that the search was related to an investigation referred to the Justice Department by special counsel Robert S. Mueller III. In March, The Post reported that Cohen had caught Mueller’s eye, with the special counsel’s team questioning witnesses about Cohen’s actions and requesting documents from Trump’s attorney.
https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/politics/wp/2018/04/09/to-search-michael-cohens-home-and-office-the-fbi-had-to-clear-a-higher-than-normal-bar/?utm_term=.69a989833d67





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[font size="8"]Donald Trump
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You know Trump loves him some walls, folks. And he’s so determined to build that damn wall that he will stop at nothing to get it. And you know what the fuck good is a wall going to do when you have these things called airplanes and boats? If he really wanted to be effective, he would build a dome over America. But as we know from the Simpsons Movie and the show Under The Dome, those scenarios tend to end pretty shitty. So here are the latest developments in Trump’s quest to wall off the United States:

The Pentagon offered new details Monday about the types of activities National Guard troops would perform while deployed by President Trump to the U.S.-Mexico border, but critical questions remain about how long the operation will last and how much it will cost.

National Guard troops will provide air support through drones and light-, medium- and heavy-lift helicopters, Lt. Col. Jamie Davis, a Defense Department spokesman, said in a statement to The Washington Post. They will also help maintain roads and other infrastructure, clear vegetation and assist with facility maintenance, in addition to operating surveillance systems, including cameras and blimps, Davis said.

They will not be arresting migrants or carrying out armed patrols along the border.

Describing the mission as a support role for the Department of Homeland Security, Davis confirmed that the troops won’t necessarily carry weapons. “National Guard personnel will only be armed for their own self-protection to the extent required by the circumstances of the mission they are performing,” Davis said.
https://www.washingtonpost.com/world/national-security/troops-sent-by-trump-to-border-will-fly-drones-gather-intel--and-clear-brush-too/2018/04/09/8f608250-3c08-11e8-a7d1-e4efec6389f0_story.html?utm_term=.048db30a9db2




Oh come on, this is the Trump administration here! You say facts like costs and deployment times as if they are a thing. You silly journalists, facts don’t matter! I mean if facts did matter Trump wouldn’t be in the White House! So Trump is sending troops to the border because, reasons. I mean if drugs are really the reason, the Trump administration can’t be bothered to do any actual research!

As for drug trafficking, the administration would be well-advised to take credit for collapsing marijuana smuggling, which is the real story. From a 2009 high of 3.8 million pounds confiscated by Border Patrol in the field (as opposed to at official crossing points), we anticipate seizures to fall to 0.6 million pounds this year, a reduction of 84 percent.

The key driver of the collapse is the legalization of recreational marijuana, at first in Colorado and more recently in California, which has allowed domestic production to displace Mexican imports. As the U.S. industry becomes more established, it will continue to take share from lower quality, smuggled product.

The anticipated legalization of marijuana in New Jersey will put another nail in the smuggling coffin, and we anticipate a further two-thirds drop of marijuana smuggling in the field by 2021. The collapse of marijuana smuggling has nothing to do with border patrol and everything to do with legalization at the state level. Nevertheless, in the time honored tradition, U.S. presidents can take credit for achievements on their watch. President Trump should do so.
https://www.cnbc.com/2018/04/09/the-real-reason-trump-is-sending-troops-to-the-mexican-border.html


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Well it’s not wrong, it’s a fact, sir! But you know it is Trump – a guy whose media diet is almost as shitty as his actual diet. 2500 calories worth of McDonalds can’t be all that bad for you can it? And neither can a steady diet of 24/7 Fox News.

National Guard troops have begun deploying along the Mexican border, answering a call from President Trump to combat the "lawlessness that continues at our southern border."

Arizona Gov. Doug Ducey announced 225 guard members from his state deployed Monday, with more than 100 additional troops sent Tuesday.

"Thank you to the brave men and women of @AZNationalGuard deploying in support of Operation Guardian Shield," Ducey said on Twitter. "Your efforts are making all Arizonans and our country safer."

Texas Gov. Greg Abbott said about 250 Texas National Guard members have been deployed, a force that will be ramped up to about 1,000 from his state alone in coming weeks, he said.
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2018/04/10/heeding-trumps-call-national-guard-troops-mass-along-border/502018002/




And who needs to actually build a wall when you can just send a human one with drones overseeing your every move? Yes – they’re watching you! And the true worth of the border wall – it’s pretty worthless, actually.

President Donald Trump's plans to build a wall along the United States' southern border is inflaming relations between the United States and Mexico. It's a contentious issue, considering the border wall would cost billions of dollars.

On Thursday, Trump threatened to cancel a meeting with Mexican President Enrique Peña Nieto, after Peña Nieto reiterated that Mexico would not pay for it.

On Thursday, Senate leader Mitch McConnell, R-Ky, said Congress will follow through on Trump's border wall order, and McConnell estimated it will cost $15 billion at most — he cited a range of $12 billion to $15 billion.
https://www.cnbc.com/2015/10/09/this-is-what-trumps-border-wall-could-cost-us.html





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[font size="8"]The Alt Right
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So if you remember last week – we discussed in more detail that I would care to know about – a bullshit conspiracy theory called “The Storm”. And the storm alleges that there’s a global elite ring of rampant pedophilia and child sex trafficking that we are unaware of. Sure, these are truly horrifying crimes, but like most things, the Alt Right just makes shit up. Take Liz Crokin for instance who says that anyone who dares to criticize Trump is tied to Satanism! Oh sure that’s what we want you to think, Liz!

Fringe right-wing conspiracy theorist Liz Crokin appeared on the “Disputed Lands” program last night, where she asserted that the cabal of elite satanic pedophiles who rule the world are trying to kill everyone through vaccines and chemtrails so that they can sexually abuse and eat children without anyone “pestering” them.

“That’s why they are all about abortion, depopulation, contaminating our food supply, the chemtrails, the vaccines,” Crokin said. “They are trying to kill us. They are trying to kill us off because they know the only way they can run their sick one-world government where they worship Moloch, rape kids, and do it without anyone like me pestering them is if they kill most of us off and that’s what they’re trying to do.”

Crokin said that, in the meantime, “they are trying to hard to normalize this because they know eventually this is going to come out” and so they are working to “get raping kids and eating kids to be cool and normal” by using celebrities like Lady Gaga, Katy Perry and Drew Barrymore to promote “cannibalism and satanic rituals and child sex trafficking.”
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/liz-crokin-elite-satanic-pedophiles-are-trying-to-kill-us-off/




Yeah probably. I want some of whatever brand of Covfefe these morons are smoking because it must be some pretty strong stuff. I mean Liz isn’t the only one who is convinced that there’s rampant satanic pedophilia out there. I give you Alex Jones’ BFF, Jerome Corsi.

Jerome Corsi, the Washington bureau chief for the right-wing conspiracy theory outlet Infowars, appeared on “The SGT Report” over the weekend to discuss his efforts to promote the QAnon/The Storm conspiracy theory, which alleges that President Trump is secretly working to take down a massive satanic pedophile ring that involves untold numbers of elite political, business and entertainment leaders.

Corsi said that it is only through the grace of God that he is able to maintain his sanity as he works tirelessly to expose the terrible truth about the rampant satanic pedophilia that is taking place and that he often finds himself unable to sleep over the thought that he may be missing an opportunity to get the word out and “red pill” one more person.

“The corruption, the evil of devoting yourself to Lucifer ends up in satanic sacrifices, children abused, human rights kidnapping, just incredible human torment, torture, snuff films,” Corsi said. “The evil depths and corners of this are so abhorrent to me, and should be to every right-thinking American, that we need to expose this, we need to bring it out, we need to show it the light of day despite how many people it’s going to be disturbing to.”

“Those of us who are going to know every aspect of it are ourselves going to have to pray to God that we come out not so damaged that we become somewhat dysfunctional,” he added. “We are going to have to make sure that we pray and approach this with the light of God and the help of God in order to get through this crisis.”
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/jerome-corsi-is-overwhelmed-by-his-calling-to-expose-rampant-satanic-pedophilia/




What crisis, Jerome? You mean the one where a puppet installed by a mass murdering dictator is occupying the government of the free world? That one? Yeah there’s that. These morons are so convinced of this that they actually held a march in Washington, DC! Yes, an entire fucking march! These are the Walking MAGAts. Or maybe its’ spinoff show, Fear The Walking MAGAts.

A group of just over 100 right-wing conspiracy theorists met in front of the White House on Saturday, marched down Pennsylvania Avenue past the Justice Department and FBI buildings, and gathered on Freedom Plaza for an open mic rally.

Several marchers brandished copies of Infowars Washington bureau chief Jerome Corsi’s latest book, “Killing the Deep State.” Corsi promotes the conspiracy theory known as The Storm, which is based on anonymous postings by someone known as Q, supposedly from deep within the government. “I see Q people,” read a sign at the march. Others yelled at tourists and pedestrians, “Who is QAnon? Look it up!”

Adherents believe that the dispatches from Q—or QAnon—are signaling that the Trump administration is getting ready to blow the lid off major conspiracy theories, including one that posits that leading Democratic political operatives are engaged in child sex trafficking.

In January, Corsi warned that eventually videos would come out showing “global elites” making children plead for their lives before “butchering” them. The related “Pizzagate” conspiracy theory nearly turned fatal when one adherent showed up at a restaurant that conspiracy theorists claimed was the center of a sex-trafficking ring and started shooting. At the Saturday march, one participant’s sign read, “Arrest Luciferian Pedophiles NOW.”
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/red-pill-rally-in-dc-unites-far-right-conspiracy-theories-and-apocalyptic-religion/




Yeah probably! So if you want a recap – the March For Our Lives had millions of people around the country and the world marching for something. Here in DC, you had 100 people marching for… absolutely nothing! But if you talk to the most die hard person involved in this cult, it is quite something because they believe in this bullshit. By the way – did you know the deep state elite satanic pedophiles were involved in Cohen’s firing? Neither did we!

Last night, right-wing preacher Lance Wallnau posted a video on his Facebook page in which he railed against the news that the FBI had raided the office of President Trump’s longtime personal attorney, Michael Cohen.

Wallnau fumed that the “deep state” and Trump’s “enemies in the CIA.” were violating attorney-client privilege solely in order to obtain information about Trump that could be leaked to the media in order to embarrass the president.

“Michael Cohen, Trump’s attorney, just had his hotel room and his office ransacked by the FBI. in order to find every personal communication he had with Donald Trump that can be leaked to the New York Times that can expose any embarrassment regarding Stormy Daniels,” Wallnau said. “So desperate, so despicable, so depraved are his enemies that they are actually raiding his lawyer’s office in order to find any type of shred of information that they can use because the Russia thing is going belly-up, so they are now going after Trump for did he ever, in 10 years, 12 years, did he ever do anything that can humiliate him or embarrass him?”

“It’s infuriating,” Wallnau said, as he began to pray against the intelligence agencies and “their quest to try to destroy their own president.”
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/lance-wallnau-rails-against-the-flippin-nutjobs-who-raided-michael-cohens-office/





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[font size="8"]Gun Nut Apologists
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You guys know David Hogg, right? I’ve been reporting on this kid lately, and he’s going places. In fact he’s really getting under the gun nuts’ skin. They are addicted to their death toys. They can’t stand it not to have their precious. Really, the gun nuts are like Gollem from Lord Of The Rings. Guns are the One Ring, and the gun nuts are chasing after their precious. In fact I reported that gun nuts have threatened to murder Hogg, and they have also started a whole website dedicated to stalking him. Well here’s one gun nut from St Louis who… yeah should probably keep his mouth shut.

St. Louis radio and TV personality Jamie Allman has landed in hot water with a tweet about his desire to assault Parkland student David Hogg with a hot poker.

Hogg has been a subject of criticism from pro-gun rights advocates since he and other Parkland students began speaking out and organizing rallies. The students are advocating for stronger gun laws after 19-year-old gunman Nikolas Cruz took the lives of 17 people at the school.

Allman's Twitter account is now "locked," which means anyone who wants to see his tweets first has to request his permission to follow him.

A screenshot of the controversial tweet, sent at 9:56 p.m. on March 26, began making its way around social media this week and was the subject of a story in the Riverfront Times, the St. Louis alt-weekly, on Friday.

Read more: http://www.stltoday.com/news/local/govt-and-politics/jamie-allman-lands-himself-in-hot-water-with-tweet-about/article_3b1fe951-d154-5d4f-a0f2-c37ea771d2af.html




Yeah BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! Really? You first thought is sodomizing with a hot poker? What is wrong with these assholes? Oh and in case you didn’t catch – his employer is Sinclair Broadcasting, which as you are probably well aware is under fire for trying to become state run TV under Trump:

In recent weeks, news anchors at local TV stations across the country have warned Americans about the “sharing of biased and false news” and the threat “fake stories” pose to democracy. As a recent video revealed, reporters recited word for word the same script bearing this warning.

What do these stations have in common? They’re all owned by Sinclair Broadcast Group, the largest television station conglomerate in the United States.

Critics have claimed that Sinclair — a company with close ties to the Trump administration and conservative politicians — is pushing its stations away from local coverage and toward a partisan brand of political reporting on national politics.

In new research, we find evidence that that appears to be the case. Stations bought by Sinclair reduce coverage of local politics, increase national coverage and move the ideological tone of coverage in a conservative direction relative to other stations operating in the same market.
https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/monkey-cage/wp/2018/04/10/yes-sinclair-broadcast-group-does-cut-local-news-increase-national-news-and-tilt-its-stations-rightward/?utm_term=.216b52f6bc02




Yeah sure whatever. So Sinclair is under fire for wanting to become state run TV under Trump. And then they have this douchebag to deal with. But at least Jamie got shit canned – partially. I mean if hot sodomy with a metal rod isn’t enough for a guy to get fired, what is?

“I’ve been hanging out getting ready to ram a hot poker up David Hogg’s ass,” Jamie Allman wrote on Twitter on March 26.

“We have accepted Mr. Allman’s resignation, and his show has been canceled,” a Sinclair spokesman told The Washington Post on Monday.

“You can’t say ‘Hey I’m just a kid,’” Allman said, according to the Riverfront Times. “We have to be allowed to refute what you’re saying... or to respond to it, you can’t be all the time grabbing your blanket when the going gets tough.”

Sinclair has also come under fire for forcing its anchors to recite the same scripted editorial against “false stories” that critics have likened to a “hostage video.”

Read more: https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/jamie-allman-canceled_us_5acc21c5e4b07a3485e7a557




Goodbye Jamie, don’t let the door hit your ass on the way out! Now what Mr. Allman said was extremely horrible. But not the worst thing said about David Hogg this week. Behind door #2 – there is Ted “Mr. Poopy Pants Draft Dodger” Nugent:

Ted Nugent lashed out on Friday at the high school students who have led protests against gun violence in recent weeks, calling them "soulless" and "ignorant" in a fiery radio interview.

"I really feel sorry for them because it’s not only ignorant and dangerously stupid, but it’s soulless," Nugent said during an appearance on "The Joe Pags Show." "To attack the good, law-abiding families of America when well-known, predictable murderers commit these horrors is deep in the category of soulless."

"These poor children, I’m afraid to say this and it hurts me to say this, but the evidence is irrefutable, they have no soul," he added.

In the interview, Nugent railed against what he called the "dumbing down of America" by schools and teachers, whom he accused of teaching students' "lies."

http://thehill.com/blogs/blog-briefing-room/news/381108-ted-nugent-parkland-students-protesting-gun-violence-are




Ahhhhhhh!!! Someone give me a warning next time! Hey “The Storm” fans, there’s a real satanic pedophile for you – Ted Nugent! Ted Nugent is your creepy uncle’s creepy uncle. In case you want to do a search on his past transgressions, just do a quick Google search. I won’t post them here. This is a comedy show, not a horror movie. Yes, the guy who bragged about shitting his pants to get out of Vietnam is threatening to murder high school students. And by the way – guess what he did after getting called out on his bullshit? Anyone? Yeah we need the sad Hulk music for this one!

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NRA board member Ted Nugent isn’t backing down from his attacks on the Parkland high school mass shooting student survivors. “I stand by my words,” the rock star said in a Facebook videoSaturday night. On Good Friday Nugent had declared that the teenaged student survivors who are advocating for gun control so no other children have to die in a school massacre, “have no soul.”

On Saturday, in a rambling rant (below) about the media that was filled with inaccuracies Nugent said that news outlets including CNN, MSNBC, ABC, CBS, and HuffPost, along with organizations including Media Matters, MoveOn.org, and the Southern Poverty Law Center, had “claimed that it’s hate speech to identify the hate of people that call us child murderers, because we don’t believe in banning guns, which won’t save any lives.”

A quick Google search could find no evidence of any major organization labeling Nugent’s attack “hate speech.”
https://www.rawstory.com/2018/04/ted-nugent-whines-hes-victim-hate-speech-attack-parkland-teens-backfires/





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[font size="8"] Top 10 Investigates: WAZE Into Oblivion
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It’s time to investigate beyond the headlines. This is Top 10 Investigates.



Traffic. It’s one of those things that we have to endure as a modern society. And it can often be the stuff of nightmares. Nobody likes to wait in traffic. Yes, you can counter that with the “nobody likes to wait in line” argument, but there are people who wait in line for days for the latest iPhone. So yeah there is that. But in the smartphone era, there are apps on your phone that can help route you around the worst of traffic. One of these apps is called “Waze” and the Waze app can get you in trouble if you are not careful.

Nobody could have known, several years ago, that technological progress could make life so complicated in Echo Park.

But along Baxter Street, everyone seems to have a story about the ineptitude of drivers — following directions from navigation apps — who can't seem to handle one of the steepest inclines in Los Angeles.

"The car came through our garden, went through two fences and ended up backwards hanging over our driveway," said Jason Luther, who was describing an accident that happened during the last rains.

"A lot of people can't make it up the hill," Baxter resident Robbie Adams said.

Why not? I asked.

"Because it's too steep, and they don't know how to drive up. So they stop and try to back down, and it's a mess because people are coming up behind them."
http://www.latimes.com/local/california/la-me-lopez-echo-park-traffic-20180404-story.html




Yes – WTF LOL indeed. So the Waze app has been routing people onto one of the most notoriously difficult streets to drive on in America. So what is it about this street that is causing so much controversy? Well of course people from Los Angeles always react well in rainy driving conditions. Always.

With grades as steep as 32 degrees -- 35 percent -- residents say Baxter Street is most treacherous in the rain, with a history of cars skidding into front yards.

It has recently become more of a concern during dry times as well.

"The rain has always been an issue, but I guess this particular issue with traffic started when Waze became popular," said Baxter resident Robbie Adams, who has been active in pressing City Hall to take steps to ease the traffic volumes.

East of Glendale Boulevard in the hills of upper Echo Park, Baxter Street has two summits with cross streets.

In the intersection with Alvarado Street, Baxter is so steep, drivers cannot see the road on the other side until starting down.
https://www.nbclosangeles.com/news/local/Neighbors-Seek-Relief-From-Traffic-Guided-to-Steep-Street-478825893.html




And that is the typical reaction from Southern Californians when it comes to rain. So what happens when you drive on this most notoriously steep of streets? Well there are lots of bad things that can happen.

Even as tires were spinning and horns honking there during Wednesday's evening rush hours, residents crowded into a conference room at the Echo Park district office of City Councilman Mitch O'Farrell to meet with city transportation officials and press for solutions. Making Baxter one-way has been proposed, but the alternative favored by many residents is adding road signs prohibiting cut-through traffic during rush hours.

Going through the neighborhood, it seems most every neighbor has cellphone video to share of incidents that have occurred on Baxter. Adams has a pickup spinning its rear tires in front of his house. Brian Sayres recorded a car giving up the climb, attempting to back down, then knocking loose its bumper when it turned around. Daniel Ruiz's cellphone video shows a backup of traffic behind car halted at the summit. Another resident's posting on YouTube shows the semi-trailer of an 18 wheeler literally grounded at the summit, its wheels dangling in the air, before it was finally winched free.

Several residents shared stories of skidding cars sliding into yards. James Anderson said the car he parks outside his Baxter Street home has been hit twice, and after the second time, asked the driver what happened.




Well there is always that. So how do the residents of one of the steepest streets in America react to the traffic that Waze has created?

Baxter Street in Echo Park, East Los Angeles, is the fifth-steepest hill in America; it's so steep that inexperienced drivers struggle with it, spinning out and crashing, especially in the rain.

Luckily, it's not a main road and so the people who've used it for most of its 130+ year history have been locals who've developed the necessary specialized knowledge to traverse it.

But now Baxter Street has become something of a thoroughfare, with disastrous consequences as inexperienced drivers -- directed to shortcut through Baxter when the main roads are busy, especially when a rare LA rainstorm clogs traffic and turns Baxter's hills into a nearly impassable obstacle -- are steered onto it by their navigation apps.

We have a good friend who lives off of Baxter Street and we drive it several times a year on our way to dinner parties at his house, and it's a serious white-knuckler. Check out the Youtube subgenre of wheeled conveyances braving its slopes.
https://boingboing.net/2018/04/05/algorithmic-routing.html




So there you have it – Baxter street is not only one of the most notoriously steep streets to drive on, there’s even a Youtube video dedicated to the insanity of driving on this street. That is it for Top 10 Investigates. Good day.




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Gather around my fair brothers and sisters! It’s time to take a seat in the pew and pass the collection plate, for the Holy Church Of The Top 10 has convened and it is our weekly duty to remind you that the holiest among us are also the most full of:



So my fair congregation, how does one choose the more godly candidate? And I answer you – they’re a republican. Well it’s a lot more complicated than that. Mainly they’re a person who the right wing evangelicals can pray to, and someone who speaks their language. Now it does not matter what kind of scandals or the magnitude of said scandals one was involved in. Are they are republican? If yes then that is who the people of JAYSUS will vote for! Just ask brother Tony!

NPR reported today that evangelical leaders are seeking to organize a meeting with President Trump this summer at which they intend to confront the president about his alleged affair with, and payoff of, pornographic actress Stormy Daniels. To those who have been following the Religious Right’s support for the president, this story seemed highly suspect because the movement has displayed nothing but blind loyalty in return for Trump’s willingness to enact their political agenda.

This afternoon, the Family Research Council’s Tony Perkins, who has played a central role in maintaining the Trump/Religious Right partnership, appeared on Todd Starnes’ radio program, where he announced that evangelicals have no intention whatsoever of confronting Trump about his personal immorality.

Perkins is among those who are in the process of planning the upcoming meeting, which he explained is intended to be nothing more than a follow-up to the meeting that Trump held with hundreds of evangelical activists prior to the 2016 election. Perkins said that there is a risk that evangelical voters may not be motivated to vote in the midterm elections and so this meeting is designed primarily as a means of highlighting the fact that Trump has largely kept his promises to enact their agenda.
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/tony-perkins-evangelicals-have-no-intention-of-confronting-trump-over-stormy-daniels/




So this is the Christian right’s idea of what passes for the more godly candidate in the 2018 midterm election. Scandals don’t matter. It don’t matter if Trump layeth down with thine porn star! Because that is blasphemy, and BLASPHEMY IS A SIN!!!! Can I get an amen???? So here is how one chooses the more godly candidate!

Intercessors for America has released its prayer guide for the 2018 midterm elections with the goal of electing more “godly” leaders.

IFA’s vision is “to see God’s purposes for America fulfilled through sustained prayer and Spirit-led obedience.” Kyle noted last month that IFA’s director, Dave Kubal, had posted a video talking about the 2018 midterms and the importance of “aligning intercessors with elected officials” in order “to see great advances of the kingdom of God” enacted “through our government.”

IFA’s 2018 guide touts the importance of getting engaged before primary elections, and it’s talking specifics:

There are twelve key House races in our nation, in which retirements, weak incumbents, or a huge field of primary candidates warrant critical intercession. These key races may affect the balance of power in Congress. Please join us in praying for these highlighted districts—even if you don’t live there.

Overall, pray that God would be honored in our elections and that Christians would not only pray, but also participate in elections.
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/intercessors-for-america-releases-guide-to-electing-godly-candidates-in-2018/




So really you just need someone who can speak your language. And so what does that mean, my fair congregation? Well I answer you… if they are a good and decent person, they are not the kind of person the religious right looks up to! For they only look up to the worst among us! Like Donald J. Trump, for instance! Because apparently Trump is GAWD!!!!!

On his program yesterday, televangelist and prepper pastor Jim Bakker declared that the attacks on President Trump are a sign that “America is in a war against God.”

“Our president, it is like he is in a war,” Bakker said. “He is not running the country like he should because he is trying to defend himself. Don’t kid yourself, he is in warfare. God spoke to me today on this broadcast; what you are experiencing in this nation through the television and through all the networking and through Hollywood and through everything now—everything—you are feeling a spirit which is the spirit of Antichrist. There is a war in the world against God!”

Bakker said that Christians who ask “why would God give us a president who swears, why would he give us a president who has had affairs with women throughout his lifetime?” need to remember that King David was also “a womanizer” and that just about every American president has had multiple affairs.

“One of the most loved presidents of all times, from the information that I have first hand, had multiple affairs daily in the White House,” Bakker said, rather cryptically. “You say, ‘How could he know?’ Well, somebody had to bring the women up the stairs.”
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/jim-bakker-attacks-on-trump-are-a-sign-that-america-is-in-a-war-against-god/




But of course picking the more godly candidate among us doesn’t mean that we should question logic or reason in 2018. No, my fellow worshippers! Because Satan be damned, in the Trump era all logic and reason has been thrown out the window! Which is why the godliest among us will say batshit crazy stuff like this:

On Friday’s episode of his “TruNews” program, End Times broadcaster and right-wing conspiracy theorist Rick Wiles asserted that government “death squads” are responsible for carrying out mass shootings in order to provide a justification for imposing gun control.

This is not the first time that Wiles has made such a claim, as he also believes that these death squads were responsible for murdering Supreme Court justice Antonin Scalia and have been routinely beating up politicians.

“I think there is something very sinister going on,” Wiles said. “I personally think that there are death squads, top-secret death squads in this country.”

“Don’t rule out the possibility that these mass shootings are organized and carried out by a death squad and then some sap gets shot and we’re told that he was the perpetrator, he was the one who did it,” Wiles added. “How are we going to ask him? He’s dead.”
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/rick-wiles-government-death-squads-are-carrying-out-mass-shootings-to-justify-gun-control/




Yes Brother Rick – even JAYSUS is embarrassed at this one! Because insanity is a SIN!!! And sins must be punished by our GAWD, creator of all that is good and holy! Can I get an amen? And unlike you, Rick, we can point out in our book where it says that because in our Bible it most certainly does! So death squads are shooting people, because, reasons. But you know what? We must not pick the wrong candidate, or we might usher in the anti Christ! Because you know that the Anti Christ will reign down with fire and fury the destruction of our very planet!

On Friday, Dave Kubal of Intercessors for America hosted a Facebook livestream with End Times author William Koenig, who specializes in claiming that just about all of the major natural disasters and catastrophes that have struck America in recent decades have been God’s punishment on this nation for attempting to divide Israel.

During the discussion session, Koenig warned that White House senior adviser Jared Kushner’s efforts to secure a Middle East peace plan could lead to the rise of the Antichrist.

“There is going to be a peace deal,” Koenig said, suggesting that such a deal would signal that we are living in the End Times, as foretold in Daniel 9:27. “It will be a seven-year covenant. This is the key final-day peace deal. For three and a half years, there will be relative peace and that the midpoint of that three and a half years in the covenant, the Antichrist will come on the Temple Mount and declare himself to be the Messiah. The false prophet spoke of in Revelation will acknowledge that he is the Messiah and then in the last final three and a half years, leading up to the final battle for Jerusalem, which is Armageddon, you’ll have Satan’s wrath, then God’s wrath leading up to the final battle.”
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/william-koenig-its-very-possible-that-jared-kushner-could-bring-about-the-antichrist/




There you have it, folks! Don’t pick the wrong candidate or you will witness the death and destruction of humanity! That is the take away I hope you get from today’s sermon. Mass has ended may you go in peace! That’s it this week for:




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[font size="8"]Laura Loomer
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This week’s “This Fucking Guy” is actually a woman – and a seriously batshit crazy one at that. I’m of course talking about Laura Loomer. If you have been paying attention to the Alt Right blog-o-sphere like I have, you’ve probably heard her name mentioned many times. But for those that haven’t, let’s run down her credentials. She’s a regular contributor to Infowars and Project Veritas, got kicked out of court for questioning whether or not the plaintiff was Islamic, got arrested after storming last year’s Shakesphere In The Park production of Julius Caesar, and claims to be a journalist despite having no journalist credentials whatsoever. At least this show – you know we don’t have journalistic integrity, but the difference is we’re proud to admit it! So here’s what Laura has been up to lately.

Right-wing activists and media figures went all-out in their attacks on the March for Our Lives gun reform rallies on Saturday, including attacking the rallies’ funding and organization, blaming “political correctness” and comparing Marjory Stoneman Douglas high school shooting survivor David Hogg to Adolf Hitler.

Hundreds of thousands of people gathered in Washington, D.C., and in cities across the country to call for stricter gun laws and call out politicians who have received funding and support from the National Rifle Association. Polling shows that most Americans support the march’s calls for gun reform.

Predictably, right-wing pundits went after billionaire George Soros—conservative activists’ favorite bogeyman—in an effort to minimize the legitimacy of the protests. Breitbart radio host Joel Pollak said it was “no surprise” that the march was a “Soros production.” The site’s sports editor Dylan Gwinn said that “we all know that these kids are being coached.”

<snip>

Right-wing conspiracy theorist and Infowars “reporter” Laura Loomer posted a selfie in response to the march, in which she wore a jacked with a patch that reads: “I don’t need feminism. I carry a 9mm.” Loomer also chided activists who ran a voter registration booth at a benefit concert held the night before the march.
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/right-wing-activists-respond-to-march-for-our-lives-by-attacking-students-and-blaming-soros/




Holy fuck! If that’s what she’s like in real life, I would hate to see her in other situations! “I don’t need safety regulations! I have a 9mm!”. “Who needs the TSA? I have a 9mm!”. “Who needs a DUI check? I have a 9mm!!!”. “I can’t believe I got cut off on the freeway! I have a 9mm!!” And so on. And that wasn’t the only protest Loomer said something off the wall batshit crazy at.

Unhinged conspiracy theorist Laura Loomer urged her followers to archive the shooter’s personal profiles, claiming that the shooter “is a Jihadi and they want to cover it up”:
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/these-are-some-of-the-worst-right-wing-reactions-to-the-shooting-at-youtube-hq/


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Oh come on, who covers up things like jihadists? What? Too soon? Well, remember a couple of weeks ago when the UK detained a couple of Alt Right / Alt Lite / Diet Alt Lite whatever the fuck they call themselves activists got arrested in the UK? Well there was this.

Two far-right activists were detained and deported when they attempted to enter the United Kingdom this weekend, triggering outrage among right-wing media personalities in the U.S. and Europe.

On Friday, far-right YouTube vlogger Brittany Pettibone and her boyfriend, Austrian “Identitarian” activist Martin Sellner, were detained by United Kingdom border police for three days, after which they were deported back to Austria. Pettibone frequently affiliates with right-wing extremists and has earned a spot in the hearts and minds of alt-right activists by flirting with white nationalism, such as the idea that it’s “our fault” if white people become a minority race. She also used to co-host a podcast with the explicitly alt-right personality Tara McCarthy.

Documents provided to Pettibone explain that immigration authorities denied her entry because she intended to work with Tommy Robinson, an anti-Muslim activist employed by Rebel Media, and was carrying “leaflets with scenarios regarding possible violence” at a speech Sellner was scheduled to give.

<snip>

Conspiracy theorist “journalist” Laura Loomer felt the need to chime in that she would not be flying to the U.K. “to join the sisterhood of traveling detainees”:
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/far-right-erupts-as-alt-lite-activists-prevented-from-entering-uk/




Which is definitely true. And why am I not surprised that Laura is friends with those lunatics? I mean Jack Posobiec and Mike Cernovich are also Diet Low Calorie Alt Lite, and they also make shit up as they go along. Remember that Julius Caesar play from last year I talked about? Guess what?

A rightwing protester has been charged with trespassing after interrupting a New York production of Julius Caesar during the assassination scene and shouting: “This is violence against Donald Trump.”

The protester, who later identified herself as Laura Loomer, interrupted the Shakespeare in the Park production on Friday night and shouted “this is political violence against the right” while audience members booed and told her to get off the stage.

The incident was filmed by Jack Posobiec, a rightwing provocateur best known for helping to spread the Pizzagate conspiracy theory. He stood up as Loomer was escorted off stage by security guards and yelled at the crowd: “You are all Goebbels. You are all Nazis like Joseph Goebbels … You are inciting terrorists. The blood of Steve Scalise is on your hands.”
https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2017/jun/17/trump-supporter-interrupts-controversial-julius-caesar-play-in-new-york




Oh come on, Laura, if you’re gonna accuse someone of being Hitler, for one you should take a look at that president who you admire so much. And second, you need to hang with some real Nazis. I’m not talking your run of the mill tiki torch, khaki wearing Nazis. I’m talking real fucking Nazis.

Meanwhile, the radical right was busy creating a troll storm buttressed by popular right wing websites like Hotair.com, which warned that "An Army of Illegal Aliens is Marching on America." By Saturday afternoon, the hashtag, #stopthecaravan was trending on Twitter. The SPLC hate tracker, which automatically detects trends among a population of far-right Twitter accounts, registered #stopthecaravan as trending.

Also on Saturday, the neo-Nazi Website, Daily Stormer, warned of "Brown Hordes on the Move," and provided a phone number urging readers to call the White House. After Trump's tweets, the Daily Stormer posted a follow-up article on Sunday arguing that the president "has at least heard us."

The notorious hate site Stormfront warned of "an avalanche of mud" heading for the U.S. border. As one poster on the neo-Nazi forum put it, "We should exercise our second amendment rights and meet them at the border, guns in hand."

Other racists began "doxing" the organizers of the migrant march. On The Right Stuff forum, Michael Peinovich posted an urgent request for readers to call the White House and a poster in the thread put up the contact information for the group organizing the caravan, Pueblo Sin Fronteras, urging its racist followers to email them. Others encouraged readers to attack the group's Facebook page. On Peinovich's Twitter feed, he retweeted a post with the contact information for the group, including phone numbers and emails. In the same thread, a Twitter user named "Frex" posted Pueblos Sin Fronteras organizer Alex Mensing's Facebook page, including photos of his family, writing, "Now is the time to go out and mine all his social media before he goes private."
https://www.splcenter.org/hatewatch/2018/04/02/trump-and-his-troll-army-declare-war-caravan-migrants-fleeing-persecution




Yeah Laura, there’s some real fucking Nazis for you. And guess what? They all vote for Trump! That’s Laura Loomer, this week’s This Fucking Gal.




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[font size="8"]Alex Jones
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Holy shit, Alex Jones has had quite the week and if you think we're not going to include him in our weekly show you are wrong, very wrong! You lose! You get nothing! Good day sir! So our good friends at Right Wing Watch (really, the Top 10 wouldn't exist without them) went to his press conference over the weekend. In case you're unaware, Infowars is currently facing multiple lawsuits for slander (shocker) and Alex put on quite the show to address the current problems facing the conspiracy theory site. RWW went to the taping and well, it's like seeing Alex put on a live broadcast of Infowars.

Infowars host and nationally known conspiracy theorist Alex Jones traveled to Washington, D.C., this week to host a press conference aimed at rallying support for Infowars hosts and guests while they face defamation lawsuits and battle against what they claim is undue censorship from social media platforms.

The press event at the National Press Club and a follow-up event at a nearby hotel failed to deliver any major revelations about the lawsuits Jones and his team are facing, apart from an announcement that Jones and his legal counsel had moved that one of the cases against him be dismissed. This predictable announcement was accompanied by more than four hours of press briefings that resembled a typical day on “The Alex Jones Show.”

Early yesterday morning, Jones and his allies kicked off a press conference they said would address the multiple lawsuits that Infowars and its guests have been named in. But the conference quickly became just another venue to advance one of Infowars’ main objectives: attacking and delegitimizing credible news media.

First on deck was pro-Trump pundit and One America News contributor Jack Posobiec, who has appeared often on Infowars. He read excerpts from an Eleanor Roosevelt speech about the importance of freedom and said afterward that he wanted to keep his appearance focused on the vague concept of individual liberty, rather than commenting on the defamation lawsuits that Jones and his crew are facing.
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/we-went-to-alex-jones-press-briefings-yesterday-heres-what-we-found-out/




So here's a few of the greatest hits - and gee would you be surprised to learn that he blamed Soros for everything? And that most of his friends including Jerome Corsi and Roger Stone are also under indictment?

First on deck was pro-Trump pundit and One America News contributor Jack Posobiec, who has appeared often on Infowars. He read excerpts from an Eleanor Roosevelt speech about the importance of freedom and said afterward that he wanted to keep his appearance focused on the vague concept of individual liberty, rather than commenting on the defamation lawsuits that Jones and his crew are facing.

But soon afterward, a host of Infowars staff and regular guests, including GOP “dirty trickster” operative Roger Stone, Infowars Washington bureau chief Jerome Corsi, Infowars reporters Lee Ann McAdoo and Millie Weaver, Sputnik’s Lee Stranahan and Gateway Pundit White House reporter Lucian Wintrich, joined Jones to speak at the podium about the lawsuits and the threat they claimed these lawsuits pose to their First Amendment rights. Jones made a point to tell press conference attendees that the National Press Club had removed its logo from the podium it lent to Infowars for the briefing.


And then there was this:

Jones said he had been sued 13 times in the last year, for which he blamed the Right’s favorite bogeyman, billionaire George Soros. Like many of his guest speakers, Jones claimed that the lawsuits against him were designed to destroy the First Amendment, which he says would be the first step in an alleged plot to repeal other constitutional protections.

Jones said that the mainstream media “killed itself” and has since “circled their wagons” to defang the First Amendment and censor content creators like Infowars that have experienced success on non-traditional platforms like YouTube. Jones compared Twitter CEO Jack Dorsey to a communist dictator and alleged that the website ranking service Alexa had been rigged to disadvantage his website.


And then they of course brought up QAnon. If I were to put my finger on it I would say someone at Infowars is Q. It's entirely possible - they know way too much about it.

Afterward, Corsi took the stage to discuss QAnon, the anonymous author of more than one thousand cryptic riddles on 4Chan and 8Chan that Corsi and other conspiracy theorists believe to be a top-ranking Trump administration official. QAnon and the related conspiracy theory known as “The Storm” are topics that Corsi spends literal hours each day attempting to decode.

“QAnon is military intelligence and close to Trump,” Corsi said. “And the intelligence we’re getting, that we’ve explained on Infowars, really is a lot of the inside script.”

When I asked Jones about his prior claims that the White House had asked that Jerome Corsi cover the transparently insane “QAnon” conspiracy theory, he told me, “That’s private stuff.”




Alex, keep doing what you are doing. But that’s not the only nonsense Alex was up to this week. Alex well, is straight up crazy. Of course you know that every single mass shooting, Alex is quick to call the shooting a false flag. Well after the horrifying gas attack in Syria this week, guess what?

Yesterday, conspiracy theory architect Alex Jones echoed the Assad regime and called the chemical attack a “false flag” launched by Syrian rebel forces that was meant to keep the U.S. and other world powers engaged in Syria’s civil war.

“It has every hallmark of a false flag. And why does it have every hallmark of a false flag? The Russians have announced they’re pulling out a month ago, the United States announces it’s going to pull out a week ago—President Trump. The globalists openly want to keep us there and break the country into three parts. This is a big, big deal,” Jones said.

He added, “It’s so obvious that they’re trying to suck us into a war.”

Infowars editor-at-large Paul Joseph Watson also uploaded his own video defending the Assad regime from accusations that it was behind the chemical attacks in Douma.

“With the Syrian army and Russia on the verge of defeating ISIS and jihadist rebels in the town of Douma, they launch a massive chemical weapons attack that brings global condemnation, inviting massive U.S. airstrikes across the country and we’re just supposed to swallow this entire narrative without question,” Watson said. “No. That’s insane.”
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/infowars-claims-syrian-gas-attack-was-a-false-flag/




I mean come on, when Paul Joseph Watson calls you out for being insane, that’s pretty fucking insane all right! Thank you audience! But that wasn’t the most batshit crazy thing Alex has said this week, I mean who are we kidding?

Conspiracy theorist Alex Jones told Infowars listeners today that liberal leaders in the tech industry, politics and media—who Jones refers to as “the globalists”—want to brutally murder people in the Midwest, rape Infowars viewers’ wives and children, and starve conservatives in forced labor camps.

Jones complained that we here at Right Wing Watch present “the great truths” that he espouses at Infowars as if they might be wildly dangerous conspiracy theories. He also dissed conservative websites that criticize Infowars and claimed he was working to fight a “New World Order” led by globalists he believes want to brutally murder most of America.

“They want power and they want to direct everybody and they want to kill the Midwest. They don’t want to just reorganize things. They want a giant blood-letting. It’s their religion. They hate flyover country, they hate bitter clingers. Hillary [Clinton] hates you. They all hate you,” Jones said.

He added, “They want to put you in a forced labor camp and watch you starve to death because it makes them feel powerful. They want to rape your wife. They want—just like in East Germany—if you want to be in the theater or be involved, you have to have sex with the party officials. They want to be able to kill and rape whoever they want. They want authoritarianism to carry out criminal operations and the raping of your children.”
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/alex-jones-claims-democrats-want-to-brutally-murder-and-rape-children-in-the-midwest/




As to what that is, we’re totally unclear. Between that and the interview with Mr. Draft Dodger Poopy Pants Ted Nugent, this honestly is not the craziest thing Alex has said lately. Last week, he said this about democrats in Wisconsin and Michigan:

Conspiracy theorist Alex Jones told Infowars listeners today that liberal leaders in the tech industry, politics and media—who Jones refers to as “the globalists”—want to brutally murder people in the Midwest, rape Infowars viewers’ wives and children, and starve conservatives in forced labor camps.

Jones complained that we here at Right Wing Watch present “the great truths” that he espouses at Infowars as if they might be wildly dangerous conspiracy theories. He also dissed conservative websites that criticize Infowars and claimed he was working to fight a “New World Order” led by globalists he believes want to brutally murder most of America.

“They want power and they want to direct everybody and they want to kill the Midwest. They don’t want to just reorganize things. They want a giant blood-letting. It’s their religion. They hate flyover country, they hate bitter clingers. Hillary [Clinton] hates you. They all hate you,” Jones said.

He added, “They want to put you in a forced labor camp and watch you starve to death because it makes them feel powerful. They want to rape your wife. They want—just like in East Germany—if you want to be in the theater or be involved, you have to have sex with the party officials. They want to be able to kill and rape whoever they want. They want authoritarianism to carry out criminal operations and the raping of your children.”
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/alex-jones-claims-democrats-want-to-brutally-murder-and-rape-children-in-the-midwest/


3

Yeah BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! What is it with this guy and his weird obsession with rape and child rape? Yes this are horrifying crimes. But you know what? We don’t obsess over them the way Infowars and Infowars fans do! I could sit here all day and show you all the batshit crazy stuff Alex Jones said last week. Man, he went off the deep end. Which really isn’t that hard for him to do. Stuff like this:

Alex Jones, the nation’s most notorious conspiracy theorist, told Infowars listeners today that he would happily move to Mexico if it became “beautiful everywhere like it is in some spots” because he is “not afraid of brown people” unless they turn into “leftists.”

Today on “The Alex Jones Show,” Jones was discussing the “caravan” of Central American immigrants currently traveling through Mexico and hoping to enter the United States.

“I want to see these countries industrialized. I want to see them first-world. I want to see Mexico beautiful everywhere like it is in some spots and first-world. I’ll go move down there,” Jones said.

He added, “I’m not afraid of brown people. I’m afraid of brown people turning into leftists that hate my guts just like white leftists.”
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/alex-jones-im-not-afraid-of-brown-people-im-afraid-of-brown-people-turning-into-leftists/




So it doesn’t matter if your ultra far right brown people come into this country, but those scary liberal brown people are the ones he worries about! Watch out, Alex, they might want to give you health care and have that tin foil hat surgically removed from your head! But apparently there’s a holocaust going on that we don’t know about! Where did you hear that crazy shit from? From Infowars? You betcha!

Alex Jones, the unhinged conspiracy theorist leading Infowars, claimed that “globalists” are utilizing radiation coming from mobile phones to carry out a “silent, invisible holocaust.”

On today’s episode of “The Alex Jones Show,” a major topic of discussion was the supposed health risks associated with radiation coming from cell phones’ wireless transmissions. As Jones was ranting about the alleged risks, he took a bizarre turn to claim that leaders in the tech industry, political sphere, and corporate world are using cell phone radiation as part of a plan to execute humanity.

“If you want to talk about something that’s killing millions of people—not 40-something—how about you talk about radiation? How about we have walk-outs in schools over cell towers on top of the schools? How about we have walk-outs over cell phone radiation? How about we have walk-outs over all of that?” Jones said.

He added, “Because this is what kills thousands of times what guns do every year. And this is how the globalists in this silent, invisible holocaust are killing everybody in their plan.”
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/alex-jones-globalists-use-cell-phones-to-commit-silent-invisible-holocaust/





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[font size="8"]People Are Dumb
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Oh hey you know what time it is? It’s time for this!



Yes it’s time once again for People Are Dumb. Because as you should know by now that people are people, and people are dumb. I want to start with this story out of Anchorage, Alaska, and people, don’t even try to fight a moose. Because a moose is one of the most dangerous and deadly animals to deal with, and if you even attempt to fight a moose, the moose will win 10 times out of 10. If you try to kick a moose’s ass, the moose will kick yours 10 times harder. And it doesn’t take a wildlife expert to know that one, just 5 minutes on Youtube. Do your best impression of the opening credits for Monty Python and the Holy Grail here.

(Newser) – A man was injured north of Anchorage after a moose that he had just kicked stomped his foot in return, state officials said. KTVA-TV reported the man escaped with major injuries in the encounter Thursday with the moose and her calf, the AP reports. "It sounds like the moose were on a trail and in this case, it sounds like the guy was trying to go through them," State Department of Fish and Game spokesman Ken Marsh says. "That's never a good idea." The two moose left the area after the man had his foot stomped, says Alaska Troopers spokeswoman Megan Peters.

"I am not a biologist, but as a lifelong Alaskan I would advise people not to go around kicking moose," Peters says. Moose have vast leg strength, Marsh said. "If you get into a kicking contest with a moose, guess who's going to win?" South-central Alaska has seen a number of violent incidents involving moose this spring, including a man who had a moose swipe at him with its hoof while feeding it and a cocker spaniel attacked by a moose in an Anchorage yard. Marsh says moose sightings are on the rise as females prepare for calving season in mid-May.
http://www.newser.com/story/257585/guy-kicks-moose-then-comes-the-payback.html?utm_source=part&utm_medium=uol&utm_campaign=rss_top




Yes, the people responsible for producing this story, have been sacked. So next up I want to talk about this story out of Denmark that wouldn’t be out of place in a Simpsons gag. So if you’re trying to blow something up, you might want to read the directions on how to blow that said something up next time because otherwise this happens.

A Danish cultural centre has been damaged after a 53-metre high silo fell the wrong way while being demolished.

In video of the explosion in the town of Vordingborg, onlookers cheer the detonation, but then watch in astonishment as the tower toppled towards the waterfront library and music school.

No one was injured in the accident.

Denmark’s explosives association said preparations for the demolition seemed to be correct, Danish newspaper BT reported.

https://www.theguardian.com/world/2018/apr/09/silo-demolition-in-denmark-goes-wrong-and-crushes-cultural-centre




So yeah people definitely read the directions next time! So next up in “People Are Dumb”, how does one deal with a problem of serial masturbation? I know! Pizza! Because everything is better with pizza, don’t you think?

Dart then instituted a program that rewarded "serial masturbators" with pizza if they went 30 days without a sexual assault or masturbating incident, according to the lawsuit.

Since detainees who had never exposed themselves were not eligible to receive pizza as a reward, the program had a reverse effect, leading to an "increase in exposure incidents" since the detainees without prior incidents "were now incentivized to commit indecent exposure and masturbation in order to qualify for a pizza reward," court documents state.

The plaintiffs have also filed class-action lawsuits with the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission and the U.S. Department of Justice, alleging discrimination and retaliation in violation of Title VII of the Civil Rights Act. Those charges are currently being investigated, according to the release.

"Some women suffer numerous incidents of exposure and/or masturbation in a single day even as male attorneys are not targeted for these incidents," the release states.
http://abcnews.go.com/US/serial-masturbators-cook-county-custody-rewarded-pizza-30/story?id=51024509




Wade Wilson is right – what situation isn’t improved by pizza? Next up – dinosaurs! And this again wouldn’t seem too out of place as a Simpsons joke. We go to Canon City, Colorado for this one.

CANON CITY, Colo. (AP) - Everyone knows dinosaurs are extinct. But this is a case of one that was extinguished.

It was a 24-foot high electronic Tyrannosaurus rex featured at the Royal Gorge Dinosaur Experience in Colorado.

Thursday morning, the T. rex began smoldering before catching fire.

Both the dinosaur and spectators were fully involved; park visitors stood and watched as flames spread through the dinosaur.

At times the T. rex appeared to be breathing flames.
https://paleontologyworld.com/entertainment/dinosaur-theme-park-t-rex-bursts-flames




Next up – newspapers. Yes not even our nation’s newspapers are immune from stupidity, or user error. Take this example from the Denver Post which posted this:

The Denver Post's guide to Coors Field published Friday had a small issue -- the huge picture on the front of the newspaper's Life section isn't of Coors Field. It's Citizens Bank Park in Philadelphia.

The photo spread quickly across social media Friday morning. The Post eventually responded by tweeting that it was sorry for the mistake and including a picture of Coors Field.
http://www.espn.com/mlb/story/_/id/23050418/denver-post-guide-coors-field-erroneously-features-photo-philadelphia-citizens-bank-park




Can we show that? Because it’s pretty spectacular:



And finally this week for People Are Dumb – 911. Yes that emergency hotline. I love 911 abuse stories, like the kind of person who calls 911 to report that McDonalds ran out of chicken nuggets. We could do an entire People Are Dumb just dedicated to crazy people dialing 911. And the British equivalent of 911 is 112. Well, police in Cambridgeshire, England decided to do a study of how many 112 calls originated from fast food restaurants, McDonalds in particular. Well…

Police call-outs to or about fast food chain McDonald's have more than tripled in three years across Cambridgeshire.

The crimes ranged from reports of missing persons to violence and domestic incidents, a freedom of information request revealed.

The News’ previously told how the McDonald's in Ely Leisure Park has become a focus for police - with customers being put off their happy meals because of youngsters constantly causing trouble.

Last year was by far the busiest with 17 call-outs about incidents relating to the fast food chain, more than double the previous year.

Over the last three years there have been 26 recorded cases of incidents related to McDonald's across Cambridgeshire.
https://www.cambridge-news.co.uk/news/local-news/mcdonalds-police-cambridgeshire-calls-up-14472850.amp?__twitter_impression=true




That’s it this week for:




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[font size="8"]Stupidest State Contest: Round 1 Week 4
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16 states will enter, but only one will be crowned the new Top 10 Conservative Idiots Stupidest State!



Welcome back! I hope you all filled out your brackets! This week, we’re live from the home of the Los Angeles Chargers, the beautiful Stub Hub Center in Carson, California. And we have not one, but two exciting matchups this week! Last week –if there’s one thing Florida does well – it’s shoot first and ask questions later, and they totally brought their A game against Looooooosiana. Meanwhile in the fight for Fiscal Irresponsibility, Wisconsin utterly routed the casino moguls in Nevada. See? That’s what happens when you get Koch money – it goes far! And this week we’ve got another double header for the final week of Round 1 – and we’ve saved the best for last as Virginia looks to unseat Texas as the king of batshit, while we have a pair of first timers – Utah and Missouri – looking to unseat Alabama as the king of the Family Values conference. Can they do it? Let’s get out our brackets so you can follow along!



[font size="6"]Match 1: Batshit Conference: Virginia Vs. Texas [/font]

[font size="4"]Virginia[/font]


So the Commonwealth State is a new state to the Stupidest State contest. Yes this is their first time in the NFFSA tournament. Virginia is right next to Washington, DC. It is the home of world class universities like the University of Virginia, George Mason University and Virginia Tech. It’s also the home of uber religious schools like Jerry Falwell’s Liberty University and Pat Robertson’s Regent University. So how did they get here? Well, Charlottesville proved to be a huge array of white supremacy and stupidity. And Virginia is going up against last year’s champions. But white supremacy and religious insanity aren’t the only things Virginia is known for. In fact it’s a toxic stew of stupidity. After all it’s the home of the Confederacy and morons who still don’t know what the Confederacy means.

CHARLOTTESVILLE, Va. (WDBJ7) -- The Virginia Flaggers hoisted a 30' x 50' Confederate battle flag on a 120' pole along I-64 near Charlottesville.

According to a spokesperson for the Virginia Flaggers group, the flag, named "the Charlottesville I-64 Spirit of Defiance Memorial Battle Flag" was "dedicated to the glory of God, and will fly in honor and memory of all Confederate soldiers".

The group believes that the flag symbolizes a "duty to see that the true history of the South is presented to future generations".

This flag is the 27th memorial battle flag raised on major interstates and roadways across Virginia.

http://www.wdbj7.com/content/news/Virginia-Flaggers-erect-Confederate-battle-flag-on-I-64-outside-of-Charlottesville-478457623.html




Yeah so Virginia is home to the hardcore confederates. So you know people say the youth are our future, but when you have youth like these… there’s nowhere to go but up from here, right?

Over the weekend, a video of the Virginia Tech women’s lacrosse team singing along to the song “Freaky Friday” by Lil Dicky was posted on Twitter. During the video players can be heard singing along to the lyrics, including the word “n-----.”

"Following an away match on Saturday, March 24, a member of our squad posted a video to social media of the team singing along to a song that included derogatory lyrics,” said head coach John Sung in a statement emailed to the Collegiate Times. “We are engaged in conversations within the campus community to share our sincere apology.”

Coaches as well as members of the Virginia Tech Athletics administration met with the full team to discuss the video that was posted. Sung considers this to be a teaching moment for the team and hopes the team will be able to learn from their actions as they move forward.

“We have confidence that the team will learn from this mistake and understand that these actions reflect poorly on our program and do not represent the values of our program or the principles of the university,” Sung said.
http://www.collegiatetimes.com/news/video-of-virginia-tech-lacrosse-team-singing-the-n-word/article_84edfd72-313e-11e8-9d9d-231e1f45d531.html




[font size="4"]Texas [/font]


Hey everyone let’s give it up for last year’s champions! Yeah!! They are back, they are rested, and they look ready to do some damage. But Virginia with their racism and hardcore white supremacy has been a proven tough fight for the champs. Everyone knows what Texas is the home of – it’s the home of world class sports teams like the Rangers, Cowboys, Spurs, Astros, Texans, Stars, and Mavericks. It’s also the home of world class universities like Texas A&M, Baylor University, Rice University, and Stephen F. Austin University. So what propelled Texas to the king of the NFFSA last year? Well it was a toxic stew of university scandals, doomsday preppers, and of course Ted Cruz. So what are the champs up to since we last saw them? Well they’re still feeling the heat from the Baylor Scandal.

Baylor University paid former football coach Art Briles $15.1 million and former university President Ken Starr $4.5 million after both were fired in 2016 {yes, that Ken Starr}.

The disclosure was included in Baylor’s IRS Form 990 for the 2016 tax year, which was recently filed.

Briles was fired and Starr was removed as president in May 2016 after an independent investigation found a universitywide “fundamental failure” in handling sexual assault reports. Starr later resigned as chancellor and law professor.

“Baylor stands by the unprecedented corrective actions the Board of Regents made in May of 2016, which included leadership changes within the university administration and athletic department and the acceptance of 105 recommendations to improve our processes, communication, training and response related to incidents of sexual violence within our campus community,” the university said in a statement released Friday.

Read more: http://www.wacotrib.com/news/higher_education/baylor-paid-briles-million-starr-million-after-removal-amid-sexual/article_2bdda9a0-43d6-5e13-94dc-72b28c1db737.html




I don’t remember that on the open carry list! So what is Texas also the home of that would make them repeat the batshit conference? Well they also have batshit crazy street preachers!

DENTON -- About 20 self-described "street preachers," some of whom held anti-gay and anti-Black Lives Matter signs, caused a stir Thursday on the University of North Texas campus, where more than 300 students gathered to counter protest or watch the ordeal.

The preachers had been attending the National Street Preachers Conference in Arlington, according to two preachers at the campus. One of the men, 26-year-old Sebastian Bryan, described the group as "regular Bible-believing Christians" who wanted to show people "their need for a savior to call people to repentance," he said.

At least two signs included Bible verses, while others included provocative phrases such as "Every Muslim is a Jihadist" and "AIDS: Judgement or Cure?"
http://www.dentonrc.com/news/news/2018/03/29/street-preachers-controversial-signs-draw-large-crowd-unt-campus




[font size="6"]And The Winner Is… [/font]

Oh my god we have a major upset brewing in the tournament! Texas was heavily favored to repeat as conference champions but due to heavy injuries they lost big time. Utterly routed by the young, upstart Virginia team! Final score – Virginia wins by 32! Final score – 100 – 78! Virginia celebrates on the court and the champs go home defeated! Wow!

[font size="6"]Match 2: Family Values Conference: Utah Vs Missouri[/font]

[font size="4"]Utah[/font]


Utah is a new state we have not yet covered. It is the home of some of the world’s most beautiful scenery, and especially for America. It’s home to world class skiing – the home of a former Olympic site – Park City, Utah. It’s also the home of a very unique national monument – the Four Corners national monument! Yes, Utah is the home of a monument where the borders of 4 states touch – Utah, Colorado, New Mexico, and Arizona. The state of Utah is one of the smaller states in America population wise. And it’s also the home of the Mormon Church. As the state is heavily dominated by this religion and its’ reflected in most of its’ laws. In fact the Mormon church is so crazy that this is the type of shit residents in Salt Lake City have to endure.

Marissa Smith sat in her Mormon bishop’s office in the same chair her boyfriend had the week before. He had looked across the same wooden desk as she was now. He had stared at the same plain walls. Maybe he had nervously played with his hands, too — she wasn’t sure.

She wasn’t sure, though, if he had been asked the same questions.

“What time of night do you kiss?” the local lay leader pressed Smith about her relationship. She answered, but she didn’t want to. He continued on:

“Where do you go with your boyfriend?”

“Are you sitting up or laying down?”

“Was any clothing off?”

“Then he asked me if I was surprised by what happens when boys orgasm,” Smith recalled. “I didn’t even know how to answer that question. I didn’t want to talk to my bishop again.”

Read more: https://www.sltrib.com/religion/local/2018/03/30/mormons-set-to-march-through-salt-lake-city-calling-for-an-end-to-bishops-interviews-with-children-about-sexual-matters/




Yeah that is happening! When the Mormon church gets in your business, they get really far up in your business! That sounded wrong, didn’t it? But the good news is that the Mormon church has taken a dip into LGBT rights. But don’t expect them to dive head first. You got to start somewhere!

As Russell M. Nelson ascended to the top of the LDS Church and its all-male hierarchy, the question came: What about women?

“We love ’em,” Nelson quipped at the Jan. 16 news conference announcing his presidency of the nearly 16 million-member Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

The 93-year-old leader (as well as his two counselors in the faith’s governing First Presidency) praised the mothers and daughters in their lives who had produced missionary sons and bishops and had served as “influencers” to the men.

The trio made no mention of single women in the global faith, presidents of the all-female LDS Relief Society, or the armies of women who work at every level of Mormon congregational life no matter their marital status. Nor did the three speak of recent strides by the church toward gender equity or even hint at the word “feminist.”

Read more: https://www.sltrib.com/religion/2018/02/22/where-mormon-church-is-on-women-tk/




[font size="6"]Missouri[/font]


Last time we saw the Show Me State, they were involved in a bitter, intense fight between residents of Furgeson, Missouri and an out of control police department that was willing to shoot first and ask questions later. But this year – Missouri is in the news for a far different reason. But first you know that Missouri is the home of such universities as Mizzou. It’s also the home of world class sports teams including the Kansas City Royals, the St Louis Cardinals, and the St. Louis Blues. So why is Missouri back in the news? Well there’s this!

In the dark before sunrise, high school sophomore Brittany Koerselman, belly bulging, seven months pregnant and feeling like a cow, tucked herself into the borrowed white prom dress that would be her wedding gown.

The Iowa teen didn’t want to be a child bride. But the cops were coming.

She was 15, not even old enough to drive on her own. Jeremie Rook, her boyfriend and the father of her baby, was 21.

It didn’t matter how “infatuatedly in love” she was then with everything about Jeremie — his long chocolate hair, his bad-boy attitude, tongue stud and 28 tattoos. In Iowa, a 21-year-old having sex with a 15-year-old is statutory rape. The evidence was alive in her womb.

Read more here: http://www.kansascity.com/news/state/missouri/article204287484.html




Holy shit indeed! This is a stunning level of evil here folks. Not only having to be victim of that, but also having to be forced to get married to the asshole and carry his baby is a stunning, jaw dropping level of evil! And they tried to restrict it, but….

JEFFERSON CITY (AP) — The Missouri House has passed a bill to ban marriages of children under 15 years old.

House members voted 95-50 Monday to send the bill to the Senate. Backers say it would help stop abuse through coerced marriages, while opponents argue it would take away parents' rights to decide whether to allow their children to marry.

Children ages 15-17 now can get married with a parent's permission. Those younger than 15 need approval from a judge.

The bill would require 15- to 17-year-olds to get a judge's approval following a court hearing. Children 14 years old or younger couldn't marry.

Read more: https://www.news-leader.com/story/news/politics/2018/02/19/missouri-house-votes-restrict-child-marriages/353758002/




[font size="6"]And The Winner Is… [/font]

No doubt about this one. Missouri utterly destroys Utah by a whopping 27 points! They will go on to face Alabama for Family Values supremacy in the next round. Final score – 85 – 58.

[font size="6"]Next Week [/font]

The Elite 8 has been set folks! Now as the rules dictate we will do an expansion round for each of these conferences for the conference championship. Single elimination. The winner moves on. The loser goes home. Next week, we’re live from the home of the San Jose Sharks, HP Pavilion, and we will see Florida take on the champions Montana in a fight for Gun Nut Supremacy.



[font size="8"]And Now This:[/font]
[font size="8”]Suicidal Tendencies[/font]

Ladies and gentlemen, we’re going to dedicate April to celebrating all things punk rock. There’s a lot in punk rock right now. You have Punk Rock Bowling in Vegas, you have the Punk In Drublic festival, and the Flogging Molly cruise all happening. So with that in mind, April is punk month here at the Top 10. Which means I want to see some circle pits! And this time we’re kicking things off with a legendary punk band from Venice, California. Their latest EP is called “Get Your Fight On!”, and you can see them at Punk Rock Bowling in Las Vegas on May 27th, playing the title track from that album, give it up for Suicidal Tendencies!





See you next week!

Credits

Host: Initech
Top 10 Conservative Idiots Recorded In Front Of Live Audience At: City National Grove Of Anaheim, Anaheim, CA
Special Thanks To: City National Grove Management
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Management: Initech Productions, CCC Management


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