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Sat Nov 17, 2018, 09:50 PM

My new excercise program is guaranteed to make you feel good, and help the country. (Satire alert)

Warning: the following post may contain satire.

I am selling my new RakeMaster5000 for the amazingly low price of $99.99.

When you buy the RakeMaster5000, I will send you a map showing the forest areas of California. All you have to do to get in peak physical condition is to take the RakeMaster5000 to a forested area and rake that area free of debris and leaves.

In no time, using the RakeMaster5000 will give you rock hard abs, and a feeling of true accomplishment, and it will allow me to become very rich.

So act right now. Supply is limited only by the ability of me to fool customers.






14 replies, 1194 views

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Arrow 14 replies Author Time Post
Reply My new excercise program is guaranteed to make you feel good, and help the country. (Satire alert) (Original post)
guillaumeb Nov 2018 OP
TexasTowelie Nov 2018 #1
guillaumeb Nov 2018 #3
TexasTowelie Nov 2018 #5
guillaumeb Nov 2018 #6
Brother Buzz Nov 2018 #10
Crutchez_CuiBono Nov 2018 #2
guillaumeb Nov 2018 #4
Crutchez_CuiBono Nov 2018 #7
Ilsa Nov 2018 #8
guillaumeb Nov 2018 #9
Ilsa Nov 2018 #11
guillaumeb Nov 2018 #12
underpants Jan 2019 #13
guillaumeb Jan 2019 #14

Response to guillaumeb (Original post)

Sat Nov 17, 2018, 09:58 PM

1. What...no link?



How are you going to get rich unless you have a Website and Paypal option?

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Response to TexasTowelie (Reply #1)

Sat Nov 17, 2018, 10:03 PM

3. Too true.

Clearly I need a Webmaster and accountant. Are you applying for either position?

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Response to guillaumeb (Reply #3)

Sat Nov 17, 2018, 10:09 PM

5. No, but if you need a data analyst to scour your Web traffic stats

to increase your potential marketing then I'm your man!

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Response to TexasTowelie (Reply #5)

Sat Nov 17, 2018, 10:12 PM

6. Would the GOP mailing list be suitable for finding potential customers?

Not that I am profiling GOP voters, but....

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Response to TexasTowelie (Reply #1)

Sat Nov 17, 2018, 10:30 PM

10. I found a link, but you can't get there from here

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Response to guillaumeb (Original post)

Sat Nov 17, 2018, 10:00 PM

2. Maybe some troops to CA to rake the forests...right up to the border?

I'd rather have troops raking leaves, than shooting folks when there's no legitimate war going on. Mound the leaves on the border?

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Response to Crutchez_CuiBono (Reply #2)

Sat Nov 17, 2018, 10:04 PM

4. How about the billions of illegals that Trump claims live here.

They should be easy to find.

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Response to guillaumeb (Reply #4)

Sat Nov 17, 2018, 10:15 PM

7. For sure...now that the canopy has been burned away for as far as the eye can see.

We should be able to see THEM so clearly...you know, huddled together exchanging clothes and shooting through polling places ov-er and OV-er again.
I'm sure don pointed them out to Neilson as they flew in. THEY need to work their way home now that don found them. Grab a rake, and start raking while walking south. Homeland Security will stand around w shotguns like the guards in Cool Hand Luke to make sure they hustle. If you have time enough to lean...you've got time enough to clean...ROUSE!!
All it took was a man...with the answer. No more forest fires. Done and done.

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Response to guillaumeb (Original post)

Sat Nov 17, 2018, 10:17 PM

8. You should sell some overpriced gloves with the RakeMaster5000. nt

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Response to Ilsa (Reply #8)

Sat Nov 17, 2018, 10:21 PM

9. Do you have any such gloves?

Or should I ask Ivanka before she goes to prison?

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Response to guillaumeb (Reply #9)

Sat Nov 17, 2018, 10:30 PM

11. Sure, send me $99.95 and I'll mail you a pair. (No shipping charges!) LOL nt

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Response to Ilsa (Reply #11)

Sun Nov 18, 2018, 12:19 AM

12. We each need access to the Trump voter mailing list. eom

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Response to guillaumeb (Original post)

Wed Jan 9, 2019, 01:00 PM

13. A $99.99 value for only....$99.99!

plus shipping and handling. Void where prohibited.

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Response to underpants (Reply #13)

Wed Jan 9, 2019, 01:05 PM

14. And if you act right now,

you can buy 2 for only $199.98.

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