Trump Honors Brave Heroes Who Slept With Wives Of Deployed Soldiers

[Zorro]

WASHINGTON—In a special White House ceremony Friday celebrating the ‘much-overlooked’ citizens for their contributions, President Trump honored the brave heroes who slept with the wives of deployed soldiers.

“Despite the considerable risks these men faced, they did not hesitate to rush into the bedroom and lay down our troops’ wives during the country’s greatest hour of need,” said Trump as he placed the Presidential Medal of Freedom around the necks of the many horny men who courageously patrolled bars, streets, and workplaces to service the vulnerable and lonely spouses of the nation’s enlisted men in every war from Vietnam to the recent conflicts in the Middle East.

“Many of these men left their own families behind to heed the late-night phone calls of married women they were seducing without regard to the sometimes dangerous consequences. They have touched countless with their licentious heroics, and, in many ways, inspired me to become the man I am today. For that, we salute you.”

Trump ended the ceremony by delivering a stern rebuke to all the blatant hussies who cheated on their husbands while they were off fighting for this great country.

https://politics.theonion.com/trump-honors-brave-heroes-who-slept-with-wives-of-deplo-1836308926

[Vinnie From Indy]

1. LOL!

[Bradical79]

2. It's sad I have to check if it's satire -nt

[JustFiveMoreMinutes]

5. Look for the Onion Label.. (sang to Union Label ditty) n/t

[Bradical79]

11. Yeah, first thing I always do before reading

I scroll down and check for The Onion link lol.

[True Dough]

6. Writers at The Onion

must have to put in overtime to concoct ideas that seem far-fetched enough to be fitting for the Trump administration.

[underpants]

3. Hate to say it

When I was in the Army we knew when another unit had gone to the field. Suddenly there were American women in many of the clubs.

[ADX]

9. When I served in the Marine Corps...

...we'd see women on the dock, crying and waving goodbye to their husbands/boyfriends as their ship departed port for sea duty, then see many of those same women in the E-Club later that very night, drunk off their asses and trying to pick up Marines.

Sad but true...

[Blue Owl]

4. LOL

Hilarious photo, too...

[iscooterliberally]

7. The onion is on a roll today....onion roll!

[RandiFan1290]

8. Jody

[912gdm]

12. YUP!

first thing I thought!

[Karadeniz]

10. I'm learning to look at the link first!