I'm being serious: Donald Trump discovered America
In the sense that Christopher Columbus didn't REALLY discover America: there were indigenous peoples here for thousands of years prior to 1492, BUT in a certain limited historical, political, and financial context, one can posit that Columbus did just that.
Now in 2015, America was getting by with its "indigenous" culture: the melting pot (which was really just a tossed salad) was humming along doing its primitive thing and along came this explorer who reawakened a pre-Civil War/Reconstruction mentality which had been more or less forcibly repressed for over a hundred years in one form or another. He awakened the sleeping giant a la the Nixon campaigns, but he really tore the lid off the top of Dracula's coffin and it is now perpetual night, where the vampires of hate may roam unimpeded. This is the new America, discovered by the grifter family of Trump. Remember, Columbus was not a hero of mythic proportions, not a statesman, not an intellect like Da Vinci: he was businessman who sought profit.
I rest my case.
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