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Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsEPA Administrator Proves Carbon Emissions Not Harmful By Inhaling Directly From Truck's Tailpipe
WASHINGTONDuring a press conference held in a D.C. parking lot, Environmental Protection Agency head Andrew Wheeler went out of his way Friday to show carbon emissions were safe by putting his mouth over the exhaust pipe of an idling Jeep Grand Cherokee and taking several deep breaths.
Despite all the fear-mongering on behalf of politically motivated scientists, carbon emissions are not harmful in any way, as you can see, said a coughing, unsteady Wheeler, moments before he was seen vomiting, losing his balance, and collapsing onto the pavement.
They pose no threat at all to the American public, and any hysterical claims to the contrary have no basis in reality. Sure, it does burn the lungs a little, but it doesnt cause any serious harm to internal organslook, Ill even take another puff. Oh, God. Oh, God. Someone help me.
At press time, local authorities had confirmed Wheelers death.
https://politics.theonion.com/epa-administrator-proves-carbon-emissions-not-harmful-b-1836912751
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EPA Administrator Proves Carbon Emissions Not Harmful By Inhaling Directly From Truck's Tailpipe (Original Post)
Zorro
Aug 2019
OP
The Onion has to go to greater and greater lengths to stay ahead of the idiocy.
A HERETIC I AM
Aug 2019
#1
A HERETIC I AM
(24,360 posts)1. The Onion has to go to greater and greater lengths to stay ahead of the idiocy.
KT2000
(20,567 posts)2. Remember the guy who drank pesticides
I wonder how he is doing. He was from Texas but can't remember his name.
murielm99
(30,712 posts)3. Maybe he will go ahead and do that for real.
I had to make sure this was The Onion. I can't tell any more.
malaise
(268,638 posts)7. or Borowitz
lunatica
(53,410 posts)8. I'm having the same problem.
NBachers
(17,073 posts)4. He needs to try the enema method.
Vinca
(50,236 posts)5. Satire is so difficult in the era of Trump. I immediately believed it.
Wounded Bear
(58,584 posts)11. Real life has become so absurd, satire is dying...
Yo_Mama_Been_Loggin
(107,693 posts)6. I knew it was The Onion
Still funny
marble falls
(56,974 posts)9. Actually he burnt his lips trying to blow up the truck.
Historic NY
(37,449 posts)10. I just tweet them to see what the freedback is...
smirkymonkey
(63,221 posts)12. Heh, heh!
If only! I love the graphic.