Are there usually state regulations regarding the scattering of your cremated remains?

[CTyankee]

My former father in law had his ashes scattered over his golf course on Hilton Head (years ago). I want my cremated remains scattered off the coast of MA (off of Chappaquiddick Island actually).
My plan is to ask my son in law to do it but find a current which directionally points toward Europe and take my ashes out and scatter them. Then maybe I'll wash up on the shore of Normandy or something...sounds pretty good to me...

Anybody have any info on stuff like this?

[Dennis Donovan]

1. I suppose there could be restrictions doing so on private property w/o permission?

[PoindexterOglethorpe]

2. A quick Google search

(I typed in Rules regarding scattering ashes) turned up lots of info.

Here's a start: https://www.perfectmemorials.com/guides/7-things-you-need-to-know-before-scattering-ashes/

But basically, you should be able to do what you want.

[csziggy]

3. Yes, there are but they vary from place to place

So you need to check in the state, county (parish), and municipality.

I wanted to be buried in a green grave (no coffin or chemicals) in an unmarked grave on my property - but in this county and state (Leon County, Florida) while you can be buried on your own property, you must designate it as a graveyard. I guess that is so if your bones are found in the future, no one thinks it was an old murder scene.

As for spreading ashes at sea, I think it is OK if is outside a certain distance from land - maybe as far as international waters.

Ah! Here is a guide:

4. Spreading Ashes at Sea Is Allowed.

It is legal to spread ashes at sea, but anything put in the water must decompose easily.According to the EPA, burial at sea of human remains – cremated or not – is permitted, but there are several scattering ashes laws and regulations that you need to follow:

Any type of remains, including ashes, can only be placed in the ocean 3 nautical miles from land or more.
Ashes can be scattered from a boat or airplane.
Only biodegradable urns may be used. Anything placed in the water must easily decompose in a marine environment.
You can release flowers or wreaths into the water, but they must decompose easily.
While a permit is not required, you must report the burial to the EPA within 30 days.
Pet cremains may not be spread at sea without a special permit.

It’s important to note that most rivers, ponds, and lakes are not subject to federal regulation, and therefore these scattering ashes laws do not apply. You need to contact the mortuary board, environmental agency, or health agency in the state where you want to spread the ashes to learn more about the relevant laws. Scattering ashes in inland waters is illegal in some states.

Many states also have spreading ashes laws that prohibit cremains from being scattered on beaches or shorelines. Some states, such as California, do permit it as long as you’re 500 yards from shore. If you’re in a relatively private area and don’t scatter the ashes in a place where they are likely to wash ashore and disturb other people, it’s unlikely that you would be arrested or charged for breaking this law – but it’s still illegal.

https://www.perfectmemorials.com/guides/7-things-you-need-to-know-before-scattering-ashes/

[Demovictory9]

7. why people and not pets?

[csziggy]

29. Because humans are "sacred" or some such superstition

There are a number of horses, cats, and dogs buried on my property, as well as dozens of pigs whose remains we found after we bought the place. No county ordinance prohibited throwing the remains of pigs into the woods and none stopped us from burying the horses or our pets. The dogs and cats mostly went into shallow graves we dug ourselves. The horses needed a backhoe to make a hole big enough to hold them.

Since some people have a sort of superstitious attitude towards human remains, there are laws regulating the disposal of those.

My original instructions to my husband was to wrap my body in a sheet and dump into the woods, or better yet, just throw out in the field and let the vultures have at it. I once dumped a frozen turkey carcass and in less than twenty four hours, there was only the pelvis and some bits of plastic from the gizzard bag and the clip that held the legs together. I wouldn't mind that for myself - circle of life and all that.

But on second thought, my husband might get into trouble, so right now my instructions are for cremation. I'm exploring the construction of a sort of monument which will be declared to the county as a graveyard and have room for my body and my husband's, if he wishes. No cremation, since it is not a green way to dispose of a body.

[Demovictory9]

44. As a kid, all pets got a dignified burial in the backyard

I bet most suburban backyards have buried animal bones

[csziggy]

48. Yep, I even have a picture of the funeral for my Dad's childhood dog in the late 1930s

The caption reads "The kids all mourn Scratch - a true gentleman."

Here is Scratch in happier days:

[Demovictory9]

49. Wow. Amaxing that you have.photo

[csziggy]

50. When we were clearing out the old house I grew up in

My sister found a brown paper bag full of old photos and negatives. I've scanned them all and they range from about 1909 through the death of my grandfather in 1956. He took most of the pictures, some at the Michigan School of Mining, now know as Michigan Tech, some in the New Orleans area where he worked as a civil engineer (and shows the building of levees and pumping stations), some in France at the end of World War I where he served in the precursor to the Army Corp of Engineers.

Other were taken in Florida where grandfather became a phosphate mining engineer in 1925 - those were mostly taken in a town that no longer exists since the company sold the houses and mined the town site for the phosphate under it in the early 1950s.

It's a lot of history as well as family lore.

I still have tons of family photos to scan - my husband and I have inherited both families photo collections. We have about 150 years of photos to preserve and share. I'm trying to get them online as I work my way through them, but it takes a lot of work.

[PufPuf23]

12. Oh my. I have directed my Executor to perform an illegal act

Last edited Sat Nov 23, 2019, 11:38 PM - Edit history (1)

as in put my ashes in a creek right before it joins a major river (on a property I owned until 2008 until gifted that particular spot to a Tribe because the property has active ceremonial sites).

[csziggy]

30. Get permission from the Tribe, now that it is their land

They can claim a prior ceremonial use and allow you to be put there.

Or just not say anything and don't tell your Executor the law. Sometimes ignorance of the law is a way out.

[PufPuf23]

46. I'll take door #2 Alex.

When the time comes, doubt anyone will notice. For sure I won't.

I did not know the law.

[TheBlackAdder]

4. I think many have rules about burying them on private residential property. If doing it, shhh.

[hunter]

21. Don't ask, don't tell.

That's too often the way of this world.

If I'm being an asshole when I die I want my ashes dumped in the California Aqueduct and the Hetch Hetchy Reservoir.

Fuck you all, you are drinking me.

Otherwise the Pacific Ocean. Because it is Pacific.

[madinmaryland]

31. Heh! I'm going to have my cremains dumped into the city water system..

Just so that everyone gets to drink me or even flush me down the toilet.

😆

[El Supremo]

36. Why don't you just scatter them at the Horseshoe?

Same thing as a toilet.

[onethatcares]

5. what are they going to do?

arrest you?

[CTyankee]

10. Some boaters near my son in law's boat might notice and notify the Coast Guard or whatever...

upon questioning, he would have to admit that he was scattering his mil's ashes per her request to kindly point her to France.

I just Googled where MA was on a map across from Europe. It indicated that those ashes would be headed towards Spain, not France.

Spain's OK. At least their leader is head of the Socialist Workers Party. Of course that is now. And I'm in pretty good health and do not expect to die any time soon.

[Throckmorton]

26. As a former cemetery sexton in Connecticut,

Cremation ashes are not considered human remains in CT.

Three things to note:
Disposing of them on public property, without prior written permission is considered littering in CT. You can receive a fine up to $225.00
Disposing of them in Private Property is allowed, with the owners consent.
The ashes are mostly bone fragments that have been ground in a hammermill, and they resemble laundry powder in consistency. So be aware that they can stick around for a while and not disappear in the first rain.

[CTyankee]

34. Well, once they are in the ocean, I expect the salt water to take care of them...

[GoneOffShore]

62. When we got my dad's cremains, I thought they look like cat litter.

[mitch96]

38. Go three miles out and you can scatter away!! Y'urp here we come!!

A friend this this years ago. Boat captain took 'em out three miles. Scattered the ashes, everybody threw in a rose. The cap' circled the boat around the ashes and roses and off they went.
Sounds touching... and And AND..... if you ever want to visit the burial site, just go down to the shore..... every little bit is in the ocean.... every ocean.....
m

[CTyankee]

39. I have a friend who has directed that his ashes go into the LI Sound, not far from where he

was born and raised in CT.

[Demovictory9]

6. people do what they want ...scatter at colleges, every where

regardless of laws

[Progressive Jones]

8. There are laws here in IL, but who cares? nt

[tavernier]

9. I live in the Florida Keys.

Have you any idea how many ashes are scattered right from backyard docks and boats all through the Keys, ocean and bay, both human and animal?

Many many many.

[edhopper]

11. Are you okay?

[Hekate]

14. Ditto!

[CTyankee]

15. Oh, yes! I was just wondering...

I did just choke a bit on some cannoli at the Harvard Yale game played here in New Haven. There was a sit in protest on climate change during half time and the protestors wouldn't leave the field. Lots of protestors. We left, thinking the game was over and Harvard won but indeed NO. When we got back home we learned Yale had won in 2 over times .

No, I was asking cuz I want my kids to know what to do with me. I certainly don't want to be buried anywhere. Floating off to Europe sounds pretty good to me...

[edhopper]

16. I am glad to hear this.

I bet if they rented a boat and went a little out to sea there would be no problem.
If they can get to the gulf stream you would wind up in Europe. Don't know how far that is from the Mass coast.

[CTyankee]

19. he's got a boat, which is why I thought of it.

He can drive the boat and my daughter can scatter the ashes, maybe assisted by my 3 granddaughters. No prayers, but champagne all around.

[edhopper]

20. Sounds like a plan

[CTyankee]

23. I will live to see that abomination driven from power and that's all I want right now...

[edhopper]

24. Many of us live for that day

As Conan the Barbarian said:

To crush him and see him driven before us, to hear the lamintations of their women."

[csziggy]

32. It's good to make all those choices

It's a burden for the heirs to have to unless they have some clue as to what you would have wanted.

My sister set an example for our family when she found out she had brain cancer. She did all the planning, chose the minister, the casket, etc. Our parents bought four plots - two for her and her husband and two for them. I had major surgery soon after and wrote a will and made my choices in case things went wrong. Since then, with each surgery, I have reviewed my selections and given copies to my husband, sister, doctors and the hospitals.

My parents didn't spell it out so when Dad died, we had to go to the funeral home and help Mom make choices. Soon after that, my sister persuaded Mom to prepay her funeral and make her wishes clear. It certainly made it a lot easier when Mom finally passed.

When my MIL died, she had made no plans. It was hard on my husband and his siblings, though they had a guide in how their father's remains had been handled. It turned out that the niche for two was only big enough for one since they had cremated a fancy coffin for each and the hardware was mixed with the remains. They moved their father and bought a "bench memorial which is big enough for four cremains - two of his siblings are planning to use the other two spaces.

[CTyankee]

40. I thought they put you in a bag for cremation. Why a big expensive coffin?

I just want the service to be funny and to have food and drink for all afterwards.

[csziggy]

42. I think some people still want a coffin for the visitation and the pomp

Even if they don't believe in resurrection or preserving the body.

I never really talked to my MIL about it. My husband's father died before I met husband, so I don't know much about the choices the family made. Husband's grandmother, father's mother, was still alive when he died so her preferences may have influenced MIL. She was a young widow with five kids, four still at home, so she had a lot to deal with.

Also, back in the early 1970s some states had laws requiring coffins and even embalming even for cremations - lobbied for by the funeral home business. Now you can elect to not have embalming (why would you need it if the body will be burned?!) and can rent a fancy coffin for visitation if that is desired. Things have changed a lot in the last fifty years!

[Maeve]

13. Not saying this is advice, but my Grandma used to say

"It's legal if you don't get caught." (She was a hoot, my Grandma!)

[defacto7]

17. If someone is worried they could

put the ashes in their pants cuffs or pockets then just empty them at will saying "my my it is dusty around here". Very clandestine way to do it. I want to have mine put in the GOP coffee machine at the Capitol. Let them suck on that.

[csziggy]

33. Do it just like this!

[SonofDonald]

18. I scattered my Best Friend and my little Sister

In the Puget Sound here in Washington

When it's my turn that's where I'll be going

Whether they like it or not

It's only a five minute drive anyway

[world wide wally]

22. I would watch "The Big Lebowski" for tips on scattering ashes.

[El Supremo]

35. Yeah, don't do it this way:

[spinbaby]

25. Disneyland has a problem with this

Apparently people keep trying to dump their loved one’s ashes around the Disney parks.

https://www.insider.com/disney-world-disneyland-family-spread-ashes-2018-10

[panader0]

27. I took my mom's ashes to White Oaks, New Mexico.

A little (almost) ghost town with some history. I went up on a crag
overlooking the town and tossed them to the wind. I think I'll have my
kids put mine there as well.

[dewsgirl]

28. I know Disney has a real problem with it. We were on Pirates of the

Carribean about 10 yrs ago and a woman attempted this, I have no idea how they even knew, as it is a very dark ride, all of a sudden lights came on and they pulled our boats to the nearest exit so we could unload, I imagine they had to clean the whole water area. I have spent it seems years of my life at theme parks and that was one of the most surreal things I have ever experienced in a park.

[xmas74]

37. I know Caitlin Doughty has addressed this on her

Ask a Mortician channel on YouTube and on [link:http://www.orderofthegooddeath.com/|]

If it's a subject that interests you both the channel and the site are fascinating and a wealth of knowledge.

[yewberry]

41. Yes. WA state ferries does this all the time.

Here, the process is to cremate the remains and have them placed in a biodegradable urn. There are a variety of bio materials to choose from: paper, sand, salt, wood, etc. In general, scattering ashes from a plastic bag is difficult and unwieldy, as the person scattering them will often get a faceful or even a mouthful. With WA ferries, there's no charge other than the ticket price ($8). They bring the ferry to a stop, make a short announcement, the service is conducted, and then the vessel moves on. The family is then given a small certificate with a sunset photo signed by the Master of the vessel marking the lat/long of the event.

I've been to many of these, and they are remarkable. People usually bring flowers to scatter after the ashes are launched. Once, when a friend & co-worker of mine was being memorialized, there literally just happened to be a choir aboard and they stood above us on the upper deck and burst into "Amazing Grace." Super cool, because my friend was a Southern Baptist and would have so loved the moment and the synchronicity.

[handmade34]

43. my story...

(an aside...I have donated body to UVM for research)... but when my dad died couple of years ago I wanted to spread his ashes in a number of places where he lived in Vermont... most went to Barr Hill where my great Uncle had a farm...

https://www.nature.org/en-us/get-involved/how-to-help/places-we-protect/barr-hill-natural-area/

I also wanted to spread some ashes at a homestead where he grew up... now a very popular brewery in rural Vermont

https://hillfarmstead.com/

the owner of the brewery is my second cousin and I went there on a busy day with my brother, and kids... we couldn't find my cousin and needed to do the deed so we could be on our way (after having a few beers) I decided to sneakily throw out a few of the ashes in front of the old homestead (now his house)… in the midst of throwing the ashes I saw him running out to meet me, him looking very angry thinking some weirdo was casting a spell on his house, until he recognized who we were... he was ok at that point but it was a good story to tell

the moral of the story... "don't ask, don't tell"


the ashes in the wind at Barr Hill...

[SKKY]

45. I've though a lot about this actually...

...my plan is to have my ashes spread across a particular beach in Southern Spain. But then again, one of those tree pods seems like a dope idea as well.

[meadowlander]

47. I think it's up to the property owner

and maybe some local bylaws.

I know some sports stadiums have banned it.

[jberryhill]

51. It really doesn't matter

Dumping a cupful of what for all the world simply looks like white sand isn’t going to attract the attention of some eagle-eyed sentinel of a quiet piece of shoreline.

When was the last time you read a headline of someone being arrested for improper cremains scattering?

They are completely sanitary, having come right from a furnace.

I mean, my goodness, what do people do with the bones when they eat fried chicken at a picnic, eh? Bury them six feet deep in a box? No. But cremated remains do not resemble anything that came from a corpse as much as everyday chicken bones to which we pay no mind.

No one is going to notice or pay any attention.

[MontanaMama]

52. I took a small bottle of my dad's ashes to game 4 of the 2014 World Series.

I sprinkled them on the warning track at Giant Stadium (AT&T Park back then) I’m sure it was a big no no but I just had to do it. My dad was a huge Giants fan.

[mahina]

54. Here there are rules but

Enforcement is nonexistent.

If your having a big paddle out with lots of canoes then yes you have to follow the rules

[ornotna]

55. You can go into the sea and do some good

https://www.eternalreefs.com/

Become a reef. Don't know if it's available in MA though.

Eternal Reefs are permanent living legacies that memorialize the passing of a loved one by helping to preserve and protect the marine environment for the benefit of future generations.

[elleng]

56. Did a QUICK check for you.

The EPA does not permit scattering at beaches or in wading pools by the sea. Finally, you must notify the EPA within 30 days of scattering ashes at sea. ... For more information, including the contact information for the EPA representative in Massachusetts, see Burial of Human Remains at Sea on the EPA website.

Burial & Cremation Laws in Massachusetts | Nolo

https://www.nolo.com/legal-encyclopedia/burial-cremation-laws-massachusetts.html

[CTyankee]

57. Thanks. Just gave it a quick read and it seems to suggest a kind of "WHATEVER!" attitude...

folks gonna do what they're gonna do on the ash scattering thing...I love it...

[Major Nikon]

58. I know a pilot that tried to do it with his plane

He basically wound up with ashes all over his interior.

[RichardRay]

59. Sky Burial

[link:https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sky_burial|

[CTyankee]

60. Um, no...but thanks for suggesting it for folks who might love the idea...

[Jersey Devil]

61. Depends on the state but don't let that stop you

Last year I had my brother's ashes put in biodegradable containers and scattered them in the Hudson River and the Ocean at Long Beach Island in NJ per his wishes, where it seemed to be legal according to what I read. But I would have done it anyway. What is anyone going to do, put you in funeral jail?

[CTyankee]

63. May I ask: why a container? Seems like that complicates thngs if the container isn't biodegradable

and anyway why wouldn't you want your ashes to be scattered...they're gonna be at some point anyway...

[Jersey Devil]

64. The "container" was biodegradable

Essentially a paper bag that degrades in less than an half hour according to the crematorium.

[CTyankee]

65. Oh. duh...