My religious family didn't like the game I planned for Christmas Eve.
They didn’t even think it was funny. As a Christian, I still can’t stop laughing at the idea. Well, occasionally breaking out in tears at the reality of it.
I’m not as ritualistic as a number of members of my family but I do integrate my faith somewhat heavily during the Christmas season. The things I do normally involve family and they are usually ready to play along. Last year I gathered eleven members of my family to join my church group in caroling at an ACLF. We then all stayed for hours talking to those living there. We also joined a church my friend is affiliated with in an impoverished area near me to do food preparation and hand out. Most people in my family also left considerable donations to the operation. Win all the way around.
Sounds good. I blend my Christianity with theirs in a healthy way. Yes, they are overwhelmingly Trump voters.
Throughout last year some friction has been occurring between myself and some other family members. Don’t get me wrong, we would do anything for one and other. I’m blessed like that. But I have found I just don’t have the temperament to listen to a Trump supporter talk about their Christian Faith. This is so not like me but the feelings are so strong that I have accepted them.
So this year I wanted to stay in form. We all went caroling and then back to my place for what I labeled as a fun Christian game. At my place we pulled out the egg nog and headed for the family room.
I went back to my room to get the star of the show. When I came back to the living room I plopped a 3/4 inflated baby Trump “blimp” on the floor and then started smacking a printout of a fortune magazine on my hand. The looks right there were priceless. But I had more in store.
The rules of the game as I explained them.
1) Order of participation will be determined by who attends church the most throughout the year.
2) Each person gets a turn smacking baby Trump on the ass with the “magazine.”
3) As you are smacking him you must proclaim a Christian value you share with Trump.
The looks on their faces as they eyed each other and the limp ass baby Trump balloon was priceless. I said “point made,” put baby Trump away, and went out for a cigar.
My family didn’t like it but they moved on quickly. I am still laughing. I was prepared to go further as I was ready to start the fun and had a good “value” lined up. But after seeing their faces I knew it was time to stop. I think spanking Trump I’m front of them, while telling them I’ve traveled the country grabbing women by the pussy so I’m clearly not gay, would have sent them out the door.
I know there is a bit of offensiveness in here for everyone. I hope it is taken well. I literally woke up this morning laughing at the whole episode. Thank god these people love me and put up with my shit. But fuck em if they haven’t taken pause over it.
= new reply since forum marked as read
