Nation Close To Getting Videoconferencing Software To Work

[Zorro]

WASHINGTON—Explaining that they almost had the online communication application fully figured out, the nation reportedly announced Monday that they were close to getting their videoconferencing software to work.

“Hello, hello, okay, I can see you now, but I can’t hear you—is there something else I need to do?” said 327 million Americans in unison while trying to figure out how to unmute themselves as they combed through their computer’s system preferences trying to locate their audio settings, unsure if they needed to disconnect their bluetooth headphones or download a new plug-in.

“Wait, I clicked on the icon on the bottom left, but now all of you are frozen. Sorry, now I don’t see anyone, but I hear a dog barking. Is that right? Do I need to click something else? Actually, I’m just gonna try restarting my computer and hopefully that will fix it. Make sure to re-invite me after I leave, though.”

After successfully connecting to the call, the U.S. populace immediately pivoted toward asking how they could change their backgrounds so it looked like they were on a beach.

https://www.theonion.com/nation-close-to-getting-videoconferencing-software-to-w-1842456277

[htuttle]

1. (RUMBLING THUNDER)

"Who's typing again!!?? Mute yourself."

[underpants]

8. We have one every morning now.

[malaise]

2. That was literally me last month

[AllaN01Bear]

3. skype works .

hem i use a plain old telephone .

[lunatica]

4. What I need is a makeup artist and good lighting

I can fumble through the connectivity issues pretty well.

[underpants]

9. 😆

[lunatica]

11. My point exactly!

[budkin]

13. I'm dying!

BWAHAHAHA

[William769]

5. Humor is always good to hear in times like this.

[RobinA]

6. I'm Glad

this isn't just me and the cheapskates I always seem to work for.

[MineralMan]

7. LOL! On the other hand,

my wife is upstairs, leading a video conference call, and none of the participants are tech-oriented. It's all going fine. Everyone could see and hear everyone else. I'm not sure what software they're using, but people seemed to manage to get it all working OK.

[htuttle]

10. We had the strangest glitch during a Webex meeting the other day

One of the people speaking froze for a almost half a minute (with a bizarre expression on their face, as is required when this happens), then suddenly the last 30 seconds of what they were saying and doing came through at 2x speed.

It was a though we were all orbiting a black hole and time was getting dilated or something.

We soldiered on....

[budkin]

12. Zoom Zoom Zoom

I need to setup my green screen background!