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zonemaster

(232 posts)
Mon Mar 30, 2020, 03:05 PM Mar 2020

Just got a call from the office of the 99.9999999% inaccessible CO Senator Cory Gardner...

Now, I didn't just pick up, because, honestly - who does that any more with calls from numbers you don't recognize? In addition, I was getting the red screen overlay with the big stop-sign on my Android phone identifying the call as a likely SCAM. Prescience? Surprisingly, though, I soon heard the little 'ping' from my phone announcing that someone actually had left a message.

Craving any social interaction, I breathlessly and immediately called voicemail to get the message, and whose mellifluous warble should I hear but that of my long-lost senator, Cory Gardner. I did a quick scan around the bunker to see if I could spot a cast-off milk carton somewhere that had Cory's face on it and a phone number I could call to report any sort of contact. No luck. Well, in his happiest, we're-not-all-gonna-die tone, UniCorey was telling me in his pre-recorded message that, had I picked up the original call, I'd have been part of his super-special COVID virtual town hall! But since I didn't pick up, woe to me, I missed my chance, but could always go listen to a recording of it later, after it's all over. Somewhere. Bummer!

Now, Cory - he's pretty elusive unless you're a lobbyist, RWNJ, or high-rolling campaign contributor. He holds assloads of private events (sometimes many tens per month) with moneyed "influencers" of all stripes, provided they give him zero friction. The last time he held an in-person semi-general-public town hall was ???? Not sure - even 'The Google' was having a hard time locating one. Looks like more than 2 and a half years ago.

Being the cynic that I am, I wonder if, maybe, just maybe, Cory wanted his call to the general public to get flagged as a scam, while another, 'select' set of citizens got the same call, but from a non-flagged number, and they were the ones who ultimately got the chance to join his scam reach-around (er, I mean reach-out) COVID town hall.



Fuck you, Cory, generally. And fuck you specifically for the boundless pox heaped upon our nation by you, your party, Dumb-Fux News, and the psychotic, infantile, idiotic, genocidal asshole in the White House. Assuming we have free and fair elections this fall, for the sake of our country, you and your fact-free, know-nothing, gaslighting propagandists and apologists need to be soundly, humiliatingly defeated.

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Just got a call from the office of the 99.9999999% inaccessible CO Senator Cory Gardner... (Original Post) zonemaster Mar 2020 OP
A Very Nice Piece, Sir The Magistrate Mar 2020 #1
I thoroughly enjoyed reading that.. stillcool Mar 2020 #2
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