If Trump were Captain of the Titanic

[demtenjeep]

If Trump were Captain of Titanic ;

- There isn't any iceberg

- It’s a fake iceberg

- There was an iceberg but it's in a totally different ocean

- People say it's the biggest iceberg

- The iceberg is in this ocean but it will melt very soon

- There is an iceberg but we didn't hit the iceberg

- We hit the iceberg, but the damage will be repaired very shortly

- I knew from the beggining there was an iceberg, long before people called it an iceberg

- The iceberg is a Chinese iceberg

- We are taking on water but every passenger who wants a lifeboat can get a lifeboat, and they are beautiful lifeboats

- Look, passengers need to ask nicely for the lifeboats if they want them

- We don't have any lifeboats, we're not lifeboat distributors

- Passengers should have planned for icebergs and brought their own lifeboats

[demtenjeep]

1. I did not write this-it was sent to me to share

no one in my group knows where it came from

[Blue Owl]

2. Oh and don't forget:

- The iceberg is so brilliant it outsmarted the ship and we can't keep up with it

[malaise]

3. And then, as another DUer wrote sometime last week

he'd put on a dress to escape because his life always comes first.

[FailureToCommunicate]

15. Yes, then he'd grab a baby to exit the ship...then toss the baby overboard after he's

in a lifeboat.

[3catwoman3]

4. And he would have been the first one...

...off the boat.

[Submariner]

5. If Trump was on the Titanic, he'd be wearing a dress

[Azathoth]

6. He'd be borrowing money from the iceberg and paying it to pee on him nt

[dem4decades]

7. Nobody thought there'd ever be icebergs in the Atlantic.

[demtenjeep]

9. oh that is good

thank you

[dalton99a]

8. Kick

[Upthevibe]

10. This is a perfect

analogy. I'm going to send it to friends...Thank you...

[docgee]

11. You forgot... That iceberg came from the Obama administration.

[Flaleftist]

12. The hole in the ship will repair itself and the water will go away on its own.

[2naSalit]

26. Just like a miracle.

[Totally Tunsie]

13. Iceberg? Nahhhhhh...that's Goldberg.

He's meeting me halfway to do my taxes.

[Grokenstein]

14. "Winning iceberg wars is easy. Ramming speed!"

"Go chop holes in every lifeboat except mine."

(afterwards) "Fake news lies to you, but I was on top of the iceberg problem when everyone else was blowing it off."

[fierywoman]

16. The iceberg is a hoax invented by my enemies to make me look bad as a captain.

[Liberal In Texas]

17. Fitting. The anniversary of the sinking is April 15.

(Actually struck the iceberg April 14 and sunk on the 15th.)

[NRaleighLiberal]

18. asking about the iceberg is just rude. We are doing a tremendous job with the iceberg.

[2naSalit]

27. And btw that was a nasty question

relax! You'll never make it.

[Haggis for Breakfast]

19. And the band played on . . . .

[niyad]

20. Excellent

[MLAA]

21. This is just perfect.

[BigmanPigman]

22. ....

[Frances]

23. Love it

[not fooled]

24. "We trust the captain"

"there's nothing that would cause us to stop supporting him...glug glug"

--drowning passenger maggots


Cap'n don:

"And I'm gonna get on the Marconi radio now and broadcast for 2 hours what a great job I'm doing against the iceberg. Make that band stop playing so everyone can hear me"

[JohnnyRingo]

25. Today is the anniversary.

108 years ago I think.

[2naSalit]

28. In a couple days...

the 14th.

How are you doing?

[JohnnyRingo]

31. Indeed.

Some days are better than others, like this one. SampleGirl brought Easter dinner to my doorstep like an angel in need.

Important I avoid the CV. Doctor says I'll die. Didn't equivocate.

I'm still breathing with one lung (and it's not a good one) because the tumor is completely blocking the bronchial tube in the still collapsed left one. COPD is getting worse for now, and I'm still recovering from pneumonia, but I can't complain.

Thanx for asking!

[2naSalit]

32. You're welcome.

She told us you were in for treatment the other day. I was a little surprised to see you here but it's a good surprise.

I hope the treatments do what they are meant to and all goes well. It's rough trying to survive and in a pandemic... once again we are on uncharted territory. Not that we have been anywhere near a recognizable location since 2016.

[Stinky The Clown]

29. If he were captain of Titanic, he'd put on a dress, push Malaria and Barron out of the way and . . .

. . . . run for the lifeboats.

[Turbineguy]

30. If trump were the Captain of the Titanic

he'd be fuckin' dead.

[uponit7771]

33. K&R,

[Behind the Aegis]

34. John Oliver made a similar comparision on his show tonight.

Must be making the rounds.

[demtenjeep]

35. I think so

it is soooo spot on

[ThoughtCriminal]

36. - If they had let me buy Greenland

I could have stopped the glacier from spawning the iceberg.

[Totally Tunsie]

37. ...and all those military aircraft could refuel at my new

Greenestland Golf and Hamberger Resort while their pilots played a round of golf.

[lunatica]

38. You nailed it!

[dalton99a]

39. And the Titanic struck an iceberg on this day in 1912.

[demtenjeep]

40. you know he would grab a child-any child

and say he was the only person that child had




then the real parents would try to find said child and drown looking