COVID-19 Put Her Husband in the ICU. She Had to Be Hospitalized Next. The State Demanded to Know:

[turbinetree]

Who Would Care for Their Children?

When Laura Whalen went to a hospital with COVID-19, she brought her kids. Her husband was already in an ICU, and she couldn’t risk them exposing their grandma. But the state told her to find someone to take them or it would.

by Topher Sanders and David Armstrong April 15, 6 a.m. EDT

On the afternoon of March 24, as her symptoms from the coronavirus worsened, Laura Whalen found it difficult to talk. She would run out of breath before finishing a sentence. If she moved, even slightly, she coughed.

Her friend Robin, a nurse, grew alarmed at the wispy sound of her voice and urged her to go to the hospital. “Laura,” she said on the phone, “you need to go.”

“I’m not leaving my children,” Laura replied. “I’m not going anywhere.”

The 43-year-old mother in Bridgewater, New Jersey, was facing any parent’s worst nightmare: She was growing sicker by the hour but had no viable plan for taking care of her two children. The usual options for watching the kids were off the table because the Whalen children were likely infected with a virus that was contagious, unpredictable and lethal.

https://www.propublica.org/article/covid-19-put-her-husband-in-the-icu-she-had-to-be-hospitalized-next-the-state-demanded-to-know-who-would-care-for-their-children

[SheltieLover]

1. Perhaps required by law

to protect minors, not sure.

But med providers are usually mandated reporters.

[turbinetree]

2. It is in most states that anyone under the age of eighteen must be in the care of an adult

I am just imagining how many more couples are in this same situation..................

[SheltieLover]

4. Very very sad, indeed.

And I think about families who have kids with autism & other disorders... 💔

[crickets]

14. It's heartbreaking all the way around.

How awful for her, and for her children. Since her children have been exposed, how will they be quarantined? Alone? And you're right - this is not the only household facing this dilemma. It's just devastating.

[SWBTATTReg]

3. A sad situation I'm sure being faced by many different family groups. NT

[SheltieLover]

5. So, if no family to take kids

In most states, child protective services will put kids in foster care. Not a pretty picture! 💔😭

[turbinetree]

6. That is where they go and become the ward of the state until they have foster parent

that will accept them and the state approves........maybe there is a gofund me account......................

[SheltieLover]

8. Yes, I know 💔

[FBaggins]

7. Incredibly upsetting... but I can't see what she expected to happen

It isn't as though hospitals can have daycare and housing facilities for minor children of their patients.

We might say that the state should "do something" - but that's what "Child Protective Services" does... it isn't just for cases of abuse.

[SheltieLover]

10. Correct

I believe hospitals are likely obligated to ask about kids at home. That's how the system works. 💔😢

[BGBD]

9. Is there another option?

Somebody has to take care of the kids. The hospital cant bandit is too dangerous to just stay there anyway. If there isn't someone the parents can leave them with, the state is the only choice.

[SheltieLover]

11. Not if family or friends can't take kids

It is how the system works. 💔😢

[jimfields33]

12. Who is going to risk their lives with two coronavirus parents

I’m not even sure foster parents are going to volunteer. This is a tough situation that definitely was not thought of by local government. I’m very curious as to the solution to this. First test the kids.

[janterry]

15. Yes, in my opinion

Our state has asked for foster care families to step up to deal with Covid.

The worker was in the wrong. All she had to do was say, don't worry. We're just going to shelter your kids temporarily - UNTIL you are better. This isn't a usual CPS case. We aren't involved because you are negligent.

The worker and the workers supervisor are in the wrong. I know the system. And I know systems don't like to be flexible. But this is a pandemic.

They can flex if they want to (there are even shelter beds for kids - for a few days). IF they had a foster bed for the boys for a few days - they should have just said, we're not opening a formal case. You aren't in trouble. It's just a place to stay for a night or two. We'll help sort them out with testing and figure out if and when your mom can take them

CPS sucked here. No doubt about it.

[BGBD]

16. idk

If I'm a CPS agent in that case, I'm not taking responsibility for the children outside of the normal established and official process. Operating outside of protocols is a fine way to become personally liable for something that you dont really have control of.

[janterry]

19. Two things

One, CPS knows the situation and can be flexible.

Two, a common technique that every CPS worker knows is to threaten the parent with taking the kids so that the parent finds a solution. (IF you don't come up with something, this is what we'll do).

I can't say this is what is happening here, but it's a very common technique. I've worked with plenty of CPS workers (most of whom I worked quite well with, btw) who have utilized this. They do this because they DON'T want responsibility for the kid(s) - and the threat is often enough for the parent to come up with something. (Saves the day for CPS).

And finally, just to point out what OUR CPS is doing (in my state)- they are looking for temporary foster care situations for parents in this situation. They are not looking to take kids away. They are problem solving and looking for solutions (they've put the call out to the state, to find families willing to help).

A proactive response.

[janterry]

13. CPS did the WRONG thing here

All they had to do was tell her this is just temporary - we care about you and your kids and we're not here to cause you stress. Don't worry. We aren't taking your kids permanently. You've done nothing wrong. We'll take them JUST UNTIL you are better.

This is CPS's fault. The caseworker did not respond the way they should have. Those temporary foster care homes are for ACUTE emergencies related to COVID.

NOT because the parent is negligent.

Bad job, CPS. Bad job.

(opinion of a social worker who has worked collaboratively with many different CPS agencies)

[FBaggins]

17. I don't see any evidence of that

Nothing in the story accuses her of being negligent and all we have is the vaguest description of the caseworker's position. We don't know that the caseworker didn't say exactly what you suggest they should say.

[janterry]

18. Any time CPS outreaches a parent

it's very frightening.

They know this. They could have put this mother at ease. I stand by what I wrote.