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Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region Forums"I Want My Death to Make You Angry"
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I Want My Death to Make You Angry
I Want My Death to Make You Angry
by Emily Pierskalla, RN
MNA Member
Denial: I have spent less and less time in the denial stage. Still, I see many of my loved ones, politicians, and laypersons still stuck in this phase.
Anger: When our elders and immuno-suppressed folks are referred to as disposable members of society, when the pocketbooks of stockholders are considered more important than human lives, when weve known for decades this pandemic was coming, I burn with anger, anger at the system that prioritizes profits over health. Its the system that regularly runs out of essential and critical supplies seasonally. I have anger knowing the fragility of our supply chain has been exposed time and time again, especially after the earthquakes in Puerto Rico, and yet nothing was done to reinforce them.
Bargaining: The governing bodies bargaining with supply chain availability over scientific evidence. A paper bag is given magic powers to somehow preserve masks that are already expired and soiled. Droplet precautions are now satisfactory for airborne illnesses (but dont you dare leave scotch tape on the walls).
Depression: Heaviness in my heart knowing my co-workers and friends will become unwilling sacrifices so the system can continue in its self-destructive path. And theres grief for the many people I will not have the resources to care for and save.
Acceptance: I have accepted that I will be infected with COVID-19 at some point. I am not scared of getting sick. I am scared of infecting those who will not survive. I check every day on our states available hospital beds and ventilators. I wonder, if my illness becomes severe, will there be resources left for me?
And then Im tagged in another social media post praising me for being a hero. And Im instantly flung back into the pinball machine as my emotions ricochet through the stages.
If I die, I dont want to be remembered as a hero.
I want my death to make you angry too.
I want you to politicize my death. I want you to use it as fuel to demand change in this industry, to demand protection, living wages, and safe working conditions for nurses and ALL workers.
Use my death to mobilize others.
Use my name at the bargaining table.
Use my name to shame those who have profited or failed to act, leaving us to clean up the mess.
Dont say heaven has gained an angel. Tell them negligence and greed has murdered a person for choosing a career dedicated to compassion and service.
SheltieLover
(57,073 posts)TY for posting this!
Solly Mack
(90,758 posts)crickets
(25,952 posts)for choosing a career dedicated to compassion and service."
alwaysinasnit
(5,059 posts)Kaiserguy
(740 posts)because of Mr. I take no responsibility .
Kitchari
(2,165 posts)X 1000
warmfeet
(3,321 posts)I will never forget this affront to life.
I will not forget.
musette_sf
(10,199 posts)niyad
(113,068 posts)Rebl2
(13,469 posts)smirkymonkey
(63,221 posts)demanding to have their "freedom" back to read this. In fact, I wish she could address them directly so that they could realize that it's NOT ALL ABOUT THEM!
ProfessorGAC
(64,852 posts)With the possible exception of folks who have nonessential jobs, these people have all the freedoms they had 6 weeks ago.
There's never been a freedom to hurt others. There isn't one now.
What's really happening now is NOT an abridgement of freedom. Rather it's an enforcement against hurting others, which to repeat, was never a freedom!
pazzyanne
(6,543 posts)I am angry too! We all need to get angry, stay angry, and make changes to our system as soon as we can, starting with removing the tRump administration in November!
3Hotdogs
(12,330 posts)to a ward where patients die or are dying. Nobody goes out in the wheelchair.
One woman was dying and knew she was. She asked for a priest and that, of course was denied. R saw she was so distressed and began singing Ave Maria for her. R is a choir singer and has a pleasant voice.
The woman calmed down an died shortly thereafter.
TomSlick
(11,088 posts)There is no more noble work.
Duncan Grant
(8,259 posts)Please let R know that her compassion also touched someone on the west coast. Ill remember this.
Hekate
(90,557 posts)Please stay well, we need your voice.
Damn, just made me cry.
OMGWTF
(3,942 posts)Initech
(100,039 posts)My biggest hope is that voters see through that on election day and do the right thing.
Initech
(100,039 posts)And it fucking sucks so much. Worse than anything I've gone through since 9/11. I just keep searching for signs that this will get better. Until then don't take our health care professionals for granted.
Iggo
(47,534 posts)klook
(12,151 posts)ck4829
(35,038 posts)Cousin Dupree
(1,866 posts)feet of Donald Trump. Thank you for posting this.
love_katz
(2,578 posts)lindysalsagal
(20,584 posts)soldierant
(6,791 posts)And I also hope that, assuming my first hope is granted, you never suffer from survivor's guilt. It seems to always attack those who have accepted the most reaponsibility and therefore who least deserve to suffer from it.