Top 10 Conservative Idiots Best Of #18: Viewer Mailbag #4 Edition

[Top 10 Idiots]

Top 10 Conservative Idiots Best Of #18: Viewer Mailbag #4 Edition

Welcome back to the Top 10 Conservative Idiots! Oh… oh hello! I know, right? We’re here tidying up the set and getting things ready for season 11. The world is slowly reopening after the devastation caused by the COVID-19 pandemic. So we’re getting ready to go back out on the road. It’s exciting isn’t it? A little bit of bad news – our season premiere is getting pushed back to July 15th because of the July 4th holiday, but don’t fear! We will still be here! So last week we announced secured dates for our season 11 tour, and we’ll finish it in our Labor Day Best Of Edition. And before we get into this week, when we start building the Top 10 every week, some segments don't make it to the air date. Some get cut, some get scrapped altogether. And that's where this Best Of comes into play. We figured we'd show you some of the abandoned, bumped and unaired segments, and even some new ones made just for these Best Of editions in our long absence! But you know last week was Father’s Day, and I’m sure you had a good one or not. But there’s two drastically different father’s day announcements. You had President Biden’s which was sincere – “Happy Father’s Day to the fathers, stepfathers, grandfathers, and father figures who enrich our character, love us unconditionally, and give so much of themselves every day so we can live lives worthy of their dreams and sacrifices.”. That’s a Father’s Day Announcement. Then contrast it with failed blogger Donald Trump, who had this to say: “Happy Father’s Day to all, including the Radical Left, RINOs, and other Losers of the world!”. Yeah he’s still an asshole. Which is why he’s no longer the president. Loser president says what? OK enough of the intro, we have a lot of idiocy to get to for our last of 3 Best Of Editions. But first John Oliver is back and he discusses the PACE program:

So in the first slot this week for our last of 3 Best Ofs, we also have some new and also unaired content for you to enjoy! In the number one slot, from Idiots #9-2, remember when Trump (1) tried to hold a sold out rally in the middle of a raging pandemic and how it backfired on him spectacularly? Yeah that was a thing that happened! In the second slot, going all the way back to Idiots #3-4, conservatives (2) often accuse Alt-right boogeyman George Soros of paying protestors, but would you be surprised when Alex Jones and Jack Posobiec got caught doing what they accuse others of? I know I am not! From the #3 slot, from Idiots #5-1, Trump (3) throws a temper tantrum over the Super Bowl champion Philadelphia Eagles taking part in anthem protests, and just disinvites them to the White House. What a colossal, giant baby. In the #4 slot this week, from Idiots #7-7, in one of the scarier and darker corners of the internet, we remember that time when 4chan (4) might have had a hand in the murder of a teenage influencer – then openly taunted and mocked her death. Some incredibly sick and twisted minds at 4chan, they are. In the number 5 slot, from Idiots #8-4, our weekly investigative piece, Top 10 Investigates (5), we remember that time Amazon CEO and future owner of Planet Earth, Jeff Bezos, claimed that he might have been hacked by the Saudis – or was he? In the #6 slot this week, we have an unaired Holy Shit (6) – so Lee Greenwood (yes, that Lee Greenwood) wrote his own version of the Bible that includes the entire US Constitution and the Bill Of Rights! Our resident pastor breaks down this insane abomination! In the #7 slot, we have an unaired Beating A Dead Horse from Idiots #10-14 – Lin Manuel Miranda is known for his ethnically diverse casts, so why is he getting so much shit for his new movie “In The Heights”? Same shit, different day! In the #8 slot this week we have a brand new Conspiracy Corner (8) – why is Texas governor Greg Abbott so hell bent on building a border wall when the rest of America thought it was a dumb idea? Come put on your tin foil hat and find out! In the number 9 (NEIN!!!) slot this week we have a new People Are Dumb, because of course they are! Finally from Idiots #7-17, we revisit our segment from the campaign trail “Keeping Up With The Candidates” that takes a look at the bizarre feud between Hawaii’s Tulsi Gabbard and Hillary Clinton! Enjoy! And as always don’t forget the key!

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[font size="8"]Donald Trump
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From: Idiots #9-2

Jessica F. from Liberal, Kansas writes:

“Hey Top 10, how do I explain to my Trump loving friends that there’s no conspiracy as to how he lost the 2020 election?”

That’s a good question! And you can start by telling them the story of how holding a full capacity indoor rally when the entire world is shut down is a stupid-ass idea, and it made him look like an idiot!

Everyone knew that Trump holding an indoor event in the middle of the deadliest pandemic in 100 years was a colossally bad idea. And holding it in Tulsa, Oklahoma – the site of America’s worst race riot, on the day that slavery was ended – was also a bad idea. But allow me to engage in a bit of schadenfreude here. Because, nobody showed up! That’s right – absolutely nobody showed up to this rally. Don’t worry, we will get to that in a bit here. But he can make all the excuses all he wants, the fact of the matter is that COVID still reigns supreme, and until we start reeling in this monster, we can kiss large stadium gatherings like this goodbye. But that didn’t stop his most hardcore fans from showing up.

President Donald Trump is "furious" at the "underwhelming" crowd at his rally in Tulsa, Oklahoma, on Saturday evening, a major disappointment for what had been expected to be a raucous return to the campaign trail after three months off because of the coronavirus pandemic, according to multiple people close to the White House.

The president was fuming at his top political aides Saturday even before the rally began after his campaign revealed that six members of the advance team on the ground in Tulsa had tested positive for COVID-19, including Secret Service personnel, a person familiar with the discussions said.

Trump asked those around him why the information was exposed and expressed annoyance that the coverage ahead of his mega-rally was dominated by the revelation.

While the Trump re-election effort boasted that it would fill BOK Center, which seats more than 19,000 people, only 6,200 supporters ultimately occupied the general admission sections, the Tulsa fire marshal told NBC News.
https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/2020-election/trump-furious-underwhelming-crowd-tulsa-rally-n1231674

Ooh boy this one hit Trump where it hurts! Yes, he’s about as mad as an angry, animated Lewis Black with flames shooting out of his head. Of course, anger is the only emotion that Trump knows. Does he know fear? No. Does he know compassion? No. Does he know disgust? No. Does he know Joy? Hell freaking no! Trump wouldn’t know joy if it bit him in his ass! So he’s hopping mad about what happened in Tulsa, and it was glorious. This might be my favorite thing about this whole rally. Can we throw that image up there?



May that image be forever known as the downfall of the Trump administration! And I love all of the Spinal Tap comparisons – Trump might be at that stage.

Plus, the history of Trump campaign managers has an eerie similarity to the history of Spinal Tap drummers. In the 2016 campaign, Lewandowski gave way to Paul Manafort (remember him!) who gave way to Kellyanne Conway. And throughout it all, there were whispers that Kushner or Ivanka (or both) were the real brains behind the operation. Or that Trump himself was effectively managing his own campaign, making all the important calls about what do say and do.

Parscale is, without question then, the most likely target of Trump's anger. But go back to Kaitlan's tweet -- this part in particular: "Anyone, including WH aides, could be fired depending on coverage."

The key -- and revealing -- bit there is "depending on coverage." Trump is seething, yes. But he's also watching cable TV. And taking calls. And making calls. And trying to suss out -- from all of that -- who the collective "they" are blaming for the Tulsa rally debacle. That, as much as his own sense, will determine who gets fired.

Because, again, Trump is all about perception: It's not about whose fault it really is that the crowd over the weekend didn't live up to the hype. (In truth, there's no way it's one person's fault.) It's about who the media, his friends and major party donors blame. That's the person Trump will blame.
https://www.cnn.com/2020/06/22/politics/trump-rally-tulsa-2020/index.html

Oh god that movie is a classic. I could totally see Trump going down that road. Maybe next he will open up for petting zoos and puppet shows. Assuming we have such activities in the near future. But you can bet there will be some firings and when that happens, get ready for the return of the Trumper Games! I mean this whole year just can’t get any weirder. And Trump’s gone through as many cabinet members as Spinal Tap has drummers. At Trump got him some ratings! Oh, those sweet, sweet ratings!

Now it’s apparent where many of President Donald Trump’s supporters who stayed away from Saturday’s campaign rally in Tulsa, Oklahoma, were instead: they were home watching it on television.

Fox News Channel, which aired Trump’s speech live, had the biggest Saturday night audience in the network’s 24-year history, the Nielsen company said. During Trump’s address at 9 p.m. on Saturday, Fox had 8.2 million people watching.

CNN and MSNBC aired only clips of Trump talking, yet each news network had about twice as many viewers as they normally get on Saturday nights. Collectively, the three networks had nearly 12 million viewers for its Trump coverage, Nielsen said.

For those in Oklahoma, the night’s biggest story was the arena’s empty seats.

In the absence of sports or first-run scripted series, news continues to be the dominant force in television viewing. Fox News Channel’s prime-time average of 3.68 million viewers for the week topped all broadcast and cable networks.
https://apnews.com/c9e9a3808ea5ff2280944f5d57e53daa

Yeah so there’s no sports, or recreation, or entertainment of any kind during this nightmare known as COVID-19. So Trump is the only game in town! He’s literally the kind of guy who would find a way to broadcast from the Springfield badlands while the entire world was held hostage by a nuclear bomb, and I wouldn’t put that past him. But that’s not stopping him from taking his show on the road!

President Donald Trump is scheduled to visit the Arizona-Mexico border, then hold a rally in Phoenix on Tuesday.

His visit to Arizona comes as the state is experiencing large increases in COVID-19 cases and hospitalizations.

The president recognized two of Arizona's most prominent Republican officials, Gov. Doug Ducey and U.S. Senator Martha McSally.

Ducey was greeted with some "boos" from the crowd.

But Trump complimented Ducey for the work he's done in Arizona and his win at the polls nearly two years ago.

The President said he asked Ducey how Trump was doing in the state, "He said you're doing really well and I said good because he knows better than anybody."

Trump asked the crowd to support McSally in November because she supports the border wall. Plus, Trump said, her opponent Mark Kelly "is very weak on China and other things."
https://www.azcentral.com/story/news/politics/arizona/2020/06/23/updates-president-trump-rally-tuesday-arizona/3238171001/

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[font size="8"] Confederate States II: Electric Boogaloo Die Harder
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From: Idiots #3-14

Ian M. from Syracuse, New York writes:

“How long are we going to have to put up with the Alt Right? I mean didn’t they get caught paying people to protest at one point?”

Yup! And none other than the king of conspiracies himself was involved!

So while that gigantic pile of fail known as the Mother Of All Rallies was going on in Washington DC, let’s go west and show you what was happening in Virginia. Can we get a shot of that?



Now just remember kids, let this be a lesson – dress for the job you want, not the job you have! Thank you! Although what job does confederate flag spandex qualify you for? Not too many that I can think of off the top of my head! Well, maybe this one.

Richmond, Virginia is bracing for violence as neo-Confederates target the former capitol of the Confederacy less than one month after Heather Heyer was killed in what many are calling an act of domestic terrorism.

CSAII: The New Confederate States of America is planning an unpermitted “Heritage not Hate” rally to defend Richmond’s Robert E. Lee Monument following the deadly “Unite the Right” rally to defend Charlottesville’s Robert E. Lee statue.

“I hope nobody loses their lives tomorrow, on either side, I really do,” CSA II organizer and Three Percenter militia organizer Tara Brandau told WTVR. “That’s not why we are here.”
http://www.rawstory.com/2017/09/i-hope-nobody-loses-their-lives-armed-neo-confederates-descend-on-virginia-to-defend-statue-at-all-costs/

Yeah we’re going pessimistic here today at the Top 10. But what happened in Richmond exactly? Oh sure, if you saw Twitter and Facebook, all you would see is the usual bullshit about how George Soros is paying Antifa to silence conservatives. But they really just bring it on themselves. Case in point:

A pro-Confederate rally that put city officials and residents alike on edge in the aftermath of Charlottesville ended without major incident shortly after it began Saturday morning.

About seven people stood for an hour and a half holding Confederate flags and arguing with a crowd of counterprotesters that steadily climbed into the hundreds until police ushered the Confederates away.

“As the group (of counterprotesters) started getting bigger, we escorted them out a little earlier than planned,” said Richmond police spokeswoman Koury Wilson.

But the organizers’ departure from the rally site just west of the Lee statue on Monument Avenue was complicated by two flat tires they discovered when they arrived back at their truck two blocks away. A crowd of several dozen counterprotesters confronted and then chased them as they attempted to drive away in the disabled vehicle.

The group made it several blocks through the Fan District before stopping and waiting with police for a tow truck.
http://www.richmond.com/news/local/city-of-richmond/monument-avenue-rally-attracts-few-confederate-supporters-ends-peacefully/article_470b9be6-0140-55ee-b99d-48bf7302d44a.html

By the way, we really need to explore the confederacy in “How Is This Still A Thing” in a future top 10 because they really are convinced its’ still a thing.

RICHMOND, Va. -- Most of the pro-Confederate demonstrators who held a rally near the Robert E. Lee monument on Monument Avenue in Richmond Saturday morning ended their rally around 11 a.m. A Richmond Police officer on scene told WTVR reporter Brendan King that members of the CSA II: The New Confederate States of America, decided it was in their best interest to end the rally at that time.

The rally, anxiously anticipated all week by Richmond Police, and which led to the deployment of a vast array of city and state resources, got underway Saturday about 10 a.m. A large crowd of people who opposed the pro-Confederates gathered at the Maggie Walker statue on Broad Street in downtown Richmond at about 10 a.m. and marched to Monument Avenue. Upon their arrival, their group far outnumbered the pro-Confederates -- some of whom arrived in Virginia from out-of-state.
http://wtvr.com/2017/09/16/live-updates-monument-avenue-rally/

Oh and here’s the biggest fail – the group isn’t even from Virginia! I mean how did they even hear about this? Did they have a Google alert setup for “confederate statue removal”?

A small, Tennessee-based group is planning to hold a rally to show support for Confederate memorials on Monument Avenue in Richmond on Saturday morning. Counterprotests are planned. Police have uncovered no intelligence leading them to believe the event will draw the large and violent crowds seen in Charlottesville, but said they've nonetheless spent weeks preparing and are ready for the worst.
http://www.richmond.com/news/local/city-of-richmond/live-coverage-about-six-pro-confederate-protesters-being-confronted-by/article_34eb5282-25f0-5a0d-b9f4-4e1ffaeb024a.html

I like that one! And then while 7 arrests were made, they just packed up and left quietly with their tail between their legs.

6:20 p.m.: There were a total of seven arrests made during Saturday's pro-Confederate rally and counterprotests in Richmond.

Four of the arrests were for wearing a mask in public.

Caroline Hill, 24, of McLean; Thomas W. Rockett, 21, of Herndon; Corissa C. Duffey, 25, of Stockbridge, Ga.; and Ian M. Gerson, 32, of Brooklyn, N.Y. were charged with wearing a mask in public. It's against Virginia law for anyone over age 16 to wear a mask to conceal their identity.

Brittany D. Bush, 29, of Petersburg, was charged with disorderly conduct. She was arrested for allegedly threatening a bystander.

Jabari A. Robinson, 21, of Roanoke, was charged with possession of a firearm by a convicted felon.
http://www.richmond.com/news/local/city-of-richmond/live-coverage-about-six-pro-confederate-protesters-being-confronted-by/article_34eb5282-25f0-5a0d-b9f4-4e1ffaeb024a.html

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[font size="8"]Donald Trump
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From: Idiots #5-1

Gary G. from Brooklyn, New York writes:

“My husband and I are so excited we get to go to MLB games again! What’s the proper protocol for the national anthem these days? Are they still against that kneeling thing?”

Sadly yes. Also sadly, we may never hear the end of this crap.

So one more thing before we get into current events. We have to talk about what Trump was up to last week because, as I know they say in the south, he done fucked up. Maybe they don’t say that in the south, I don’t know. But seriously even the best comedy writers in the entire world couldn’t come up with the epic fails of the Trump administration and especially in the last week! The first is we got to talk about what happened when he disinvited the Eagles to the White House.

NFL owners were reportedly motivated by fear of incendiary comments from Donald Trump when devising the league’s new anthem policy. And that hand-wringing over Trump was further validated on Monday, when the President canceled the Eagles’ White House visit less than 24 hours before the scheduled ceremony to celebrate the Super Bowl LII champions. Clearly, the President is not done using the NFL and the anthem issue to serve his own political agenda.

Many Eagles players, including safety Malcolm Jenkins and defensive end Chris Long, said they wouldn’t be attending the White House because they don’t agree with Trump’s politics, not because the president insists that NFL players must stand for the anthem or “maybe they shouldn’t be in the country.” For the players, not attending Trump’s White House ceremony has never been about the anthem issue. It’s about disagreeing with Trump’s views on policing, criminal justice, and racial inequality.

Trump’s ego might have been bruised by the report that fewer than 10 Eagles players would be attending, so rather than host a sparsely attended ceremony he uninvited the whole organization. Quarterback Carson Wentz said recently that he would attend if the team as a whole decided they would go.
https://www.si.com/nfl/2018/06/05/philadelphia-eagles-trump-president-white-house-visit-anthem-policy

Wrong Eagles, Dude. But while Trump was frothing at the mouth batshit crazy over people not standing for the anthem, guess what? It turns out he was manipulated by… Fox News! Yup – you know their saying “We report, you decide!” should really be changed to “We report, HE decides!”.

Fox News apologized Tuesday after receiving a torrent of criticism over the network's use of photos of various players for the Philadelphia Eagles kneeling in prayer, creating the misleading impression that they were demonstrating during the national anthem.

The photos ran during a segment on Monday night, after President Trump announced that he had uninvited the reigning Super Bowl champions from a traditional visit to the White House.

As Fox News anchor Shannon Bream explained Trump's decision, which he attributed to the anthem protests that have roiled the league, photos of Eagles players kneeling in prayer were shown on screen.
http://money.cnn.com/2018/06/05/media/fox-news-philadelphia-eagles-kneeling/index.html

But the real fail came when Trump decided to throw out the Eagles’ visit and replace it with a patriotic brew ha ha, and well, we got to show the clip because this is too fucking good.

Excuse me a minute… by the way I love that this guy remixed the clip with the theme song to Curb Your Enthusiasm:

Link to tweet

I love that so much! But here’s the real fail behind all of this – Trump didn’t know the words to God Bless America! That’s right – Mr. “I’m Too Patriotic For My Shirt”…. So patriotic, yeah!! Forgot the fucking words to one of the most patriotic songs there is!

Taking on the NFL and football’s Super Bowl champs,U.S. President Donald Trump gave the boot to a White House ceremony for the Philadelphia Eagles on Tuesday and instead threw his own brief “Celebration of America” after it became clear most players weren’t going to show up.

Both sides traded hot accusations about who was to blame. Trump himself made headlines at the rally for apparently forgetting the words to "God Bless America." Video shows the president attempting to sing-along with a military band standing behind him.

Trump tried to turn the fracas into a referendum on patriotism and tie it to the dispute over players who have taken a knee during the national anthem to protest racism and police brutality. However, Eagles players never knelt during the “Star-Spangled Banner,” throughout the 2017 season and their march to the Super Bowl. Fox News, a known news source for Trump, was rebuked and apologized this week for showing images of Eagles players kneeling while praying on the field as evidence they protested the National Anthem.
https://www.haaretz.com/us-news/trump-forgets-words-to-god-bless-america-at-patriotic-counter-nfl-rally-1.6155002

Yeah you actually are completely wrong this time! I’m not really the most patriotic or religious guy known to man and I know the fucking words to that song! OK really I know the words enough that I can at least make it look like I’m lip syncing accurately! By the way if you’re wondering exactly how many Eagles players kneeled, here’s your answer.

Why did Trump cancel?

In a statement, Trump said that Eagles players "disagree with their President because he insists that they proudly stand for the National Anthem, hand on heart, in honor of the great men and women of our military and the people of our country."

Who from the Eagles kneeled last season?

No Eagles player kneeled during the national anthem in the regular season. Jenkins was among several players throughout the league who raised his fist during the anthem, and Long placed his hand on Jenkins' shoulder, until Week 13. At that point, a coalition of players led by Jenkins had agreed on the framework of an $89 million social justice platform with the league.
http://www.espn.com/nfl/story/_/id/23704050/what-donald-trump-canceling-philadelphia-eagles-visit-means-nfl-national-anthem-policy

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[font size="8"]Scary 4Chan, Bianca’s Dead
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From: Idiots #7-7

Christina A. from Grosse Point, Michigan writes:

“My friend told me that Q Anon originated from that website 4chan. Didn’t they kill someone? I seem to remember that story!”

You’re absolutely right, Christina! There’s some sick, twisted, and depraved minds at work over at the depths of internet hell known as 4chan. Well… half right, I think the jury might still be out on this one!

Normally the Top 10 policy is that we don’t joke about things like murder or mass shootings or the situation going on at the border because it’s really too horrifying to make fun of. And this next story is about a murder. But when 4chan is involved… no really, fuck 4chan. And fuck 8chan too. And 16chan, and 32chan, and 64chan, and 128chan. Really, fuck all the Chans at this point. Except for our assistant producer Harold Chan, he can stay. Now the title of this entry comes from an old Psych episode called “Scary Sherry, Bianca’s Dead”. So for this piece, let’s call it “Scary 4chan, Bianca’s Dead”. And for this entry, we will channel our inner Shawn Spencer and Burton Guster. So before we dive into trashing this horrid excuse for an internet forum, what happened exactly?

A young woman active on social media was brutally murdered, with gruesome photos of her body posted to Instagram and other platforms.

Horrific images of 17-year-old Bianca Devins were posted on Instagram early Sunday, after she went to a concert in Queens with Brandon Andrew Clark.

Clark, 21, reportedly called police on himself, according to Lt. Bryan Coromato. When he was discovered in his car in Utica, Clark reportedly slit his own throat and posted pictures of his bleeding neck on Instagram as well.

Devins, who was a popular "egirl" on Tik Tok, was was found dead outside the SUV. Clark was rushed to the hospital, where he underwent surgery. The two reportedly met online, and had been seeing each other for about two months before the night of the concert, by Canadian musician Nicole Dollenganger.

Bianca's sister, Olivia Devins, later called Clark a "close family friend."
https://www.newsweek.com/bianca-devins-murder-discord-1449363

Yes, stay creepy 4chan! And really what an age we live in where evidence of a fucking murder can be posted online in messaging forums. And how is 4chan not being monitored by the FBI and CIA as being a terrorist group? Well, maybe terrorism is a harsh word to use for a group of incels who live in their mom’s basement and spend the whole day chain smoking and pooping their pants. I assume that’s what incels do all day. But what drove them to murder?

"Here comes Hell. It's redemption, right?"

Brandon Andrew Clark posed that question, taken from a rock song, to his Instagram followers in a temporary 24-hour story posted before dawn last Sunday.

The next image he shared was far more disturbing. A blurry photograph captioned "I'm sorry Bianca" appeared to show a woman's bloodied torso.

Before then his Instagram account, which we have chosen not to name, was mostly used to catalogue selfies and posts about music and art. Police believe the 21 year old had met Bianca through the platform two months earlier and their relationship had progressed in person since.

On Saturday, he drove Bianca to New York City from Utica, where she lived, to see Canadian singer Nicole Dollanganger perform. Police said they believed the pair had got into an argument on the way back, possibly about her kissing someone else, and he had fatally attacked her with a knife.

Police said the suspect shared an even more graphic photograph of Bianca's body on Discord - a popular messaging platform for gamers. This image showed the extent of injuries to Bianca's throat and made clear her wounds had been fatal.
https://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-49002486

Obviously. Look, passionate romance is nothing to joke about. And for an Incel who was lucky enough to score, that shit should be taken seriously! So what happens when a murder like this goes viral? And going viral is probably the worst thing you can say about someone’s murder. Oh pictures of her fatally stabbed body just.. went viral. Yeah that doesn’t sound good at all does it?

Like most mornings, Jared, who lives in a small town in southern Utah, logged in to Bianca’s group chat on Sunday to see what he’d missed overnight.

There, posted 15 minutes earlier, was a photo of Bianca’s body. From the gaze in her eyes and the extensive injuries, it was obvious she was dead.

The image, posted under a username associated with Clark, was accompanied by a message: “Sorry fuckers, you’re going to have to find someone else to orbit.”

On his own social media accounts, Clark was busy telling a story seemingly calculated for maximum exposure. He uploaded pictures of himself and Bianca’s body and declared his intention to kill himself. As police arrived to apprehend him on a secluded street in Utica, he continued to snap photos and post them online.

He even left a message at the scene, police said: The words “May you never forget me” were spray-painted on the pavement, an apparent reference to a manga about a toxic relationship that both he and Bianca liked.
https://www.huffpost.com/entry/bianca-devins-death-internet_n_5d2e382ae4b0a873f6431763

Holy shit! I think we might have found the worst possible use for Instagram here. This is where toxic masculinity takes a very ugly turn. And toxic masculinity is ugly to begin with! Just adding the word “toxic” to anything makes it ugly. Like… toxic unicorns. Yes, the word “toxic” can make the most innocent things sound horrible. Like for instance I literally just turned something as innocent as a unicorn into something extremely horrifying and terrible. You can’t get that image out of your head now, can you? And here’s where social media gets really ugly.

After Bianca Devins’ brutal murder, incels and trolls gleefully circulated photos of her mutilated body across the internet. But within days, the #RIPBianca hashtag and her tagged Instagram photos were transformed into an endless stream of bubblegum pink, fluffy white kittens, candy hearts, and glittery pink clouds.

The dreamy imagery is coming from a vast community of “e-girls,” an online subculture influenced by video games, anime, and grunge that Devins had belonged to.

For these girls and young women, many of whom face harassment and threats on a regular basis, Devin’s brutal murder hit way too close to home.

“Finding out about Bianca was terrifying,” said Ashley Eldridge, a 19-year-old e-girl. “I worry about stuff like that happening all the time. I’m constantly scared that someone is going to recognize me in real life and follow me.”

The e-girl community was almost instantly privy to the incredible violence Devins suffered in the final moments of her life, sometime in the early hours of Sunday morning. Her killer stabbed her to death and then shared pictures of her dead body on social media, including her Discord server. Police suspect her boyfriend, a 22-year-old online influencer Brandon Clark who police say she’d met through Instagram about two months earlier.
https://news.vice.com/en_us/article/pajn58/the-e-girl-community-is-a-world-of-glittery-pink-clouds-harassment-and-now-murder

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[font size="8"]Top 10 Investigates: Jeff Bezos Hacked
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From: [link:https://www.democraticunderground.com/100212925717]

Joel H. from Tuscon, Arizona writes:

“When Jeff Bezos and those other billionaires go into space, can we just leave them there?”

Well Joel, unofficially and off the record, let’s just say I’m for it. Especially after we had to report on this bullshit.

It’s time to investigate beyond the headlines! This is Top 10 Investigates!

The issue of cyber security is a very complex one. People day in and day out complain about, and are worried about their bank accounts and personal data being bought and sold under very shady circumstances. But this hack claim surrounds just one person. And that person just happens to be the wealthiest man in the world, Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos. Even Jeff Bezos is not immune from hacking and phishing scams that have plagued the internet since its’ inception. But just how accurate are the claims that Bezos was hacked by Saudia Arabia via the What’s App application? So who is to blame in this situation?

WhatsApp disclosed 12 security vulnerabilities last year, according to the US National Vulnerabilities Database, sparking questions about the security of the app amid reports that Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos' phone was hacked by Saudi Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman.

The Guardian first reported last week that bin Salman had covertly stolen data from the Amazon CEO's phone after sending an unsolicited video that contained a malicious file in 2018.

The hack on Bezos' phone is believed to have happen after the two men exchanged friendly messages on WhatsApp on May 1, 2018, weeks after they had met at a dinner in Los Angeles while the prince was in the US on official business.

Bezos' team began investigating his phone in January 2019 after The National Enquirer published a story about him having an affair. After the accusation Bezos accused the tabloid's parent company, American Media Inc., of blackmailing him by threatening to publish his nude images.

The Saudi government has called the report "absurd" and called for an investigation into the claims.
https://www.businessinsider.com/jeff-bezos-hack-whatsapp-disclosed-security-flaws-last-year-ft-2020-1

Yes, there’s a chance Jeff Bezos could have been hacked, but then again he is Jeff Bezos. It’s not like you have to do a search on the black market internet to find out much information about him. Also, it’s the National Fucking Enquirer too, they don’t exactly have the highest journalistic integrity in the journalism industry. But then again, neither do we. But who is to blame for this? Do you blame the Saudis? Or is it the fault of the phone manufacturers?

On Friday, Facebook's vice president of global affairs and communications, Nick Clegg, said that the hacking of Jeff Bezos's phone wasn't the fault of WhatsApp, pointing instaed to the Apple iOS that powers the iPhone X Bezos was using. Or, at least, that's presumably what he was trying to say, though his answer when asked by the BBC was largely incomprehensible.

Clegg's explanation was that WhatsApp couldn't be at fault because its messages are end-to-end encrypted, meaning they can't be hacked. Rather, he argued, "It sounds like something on the, you know, what they call the operate, operated on the phone itself." To be clear, he didn't specifically mention Apple by name, however it had been previously known that Bezos was using an iPhone X at the time he was hacked.

"It can't have been anything on the, when the message was sent, in transit, because that's end-to-end encrypted on WhatsApp," Clegg said.

As a reminder, the allegation is that the Saudi Crown Prince, Mohammad bin Salman, sent a message to Amazon's CEO using WhatsApp. That message included a relatively small video file that contained malware that was used to access the contents on the iPhone.
https://www.inc.com/jason-aten/facebook-says-apple-is-to-blame-for-hacking-of-jeff-bezos-phone.html

Yes, you could have been hacked, or someone could have done a Google search. But how it happens and why it happens could apply to just about anybody. But could Saudi Prince Muhammed bin Salman been behind the hack? Yeah probably. But don’t go playing the blame game. Because that’s how they win, and they thrive off this sort of thing. Did Jeff Bezos get hacked or did he not get hacked?

UN human rights experts have demanded an immediate investigation into allegations Saudi Arabia's crown prince hacked Amazon boss Jeff Bezos's phone.

They said Mohammed bin Salman should also be investigated for "continuous, direct and personal efforts to target perceived opponents".

A message from a phone number used by the prince has been implicated in a breach of Mr Bezos's data.

The kingdom's US embassy has denied the "absurd" story.

But the independent UN experts - Agnes Callamard, special rapporteur on summary executions and extrajudicial killings, and David Kaye, special rapporteur on freedom of expression - said the crown prince's "possible involvement" had to be investigated.

Relations between Saudi Arabia and Mr Bezos - who also owns the Washington Post - worsened after Jamal Khashoggi, a prominent critic of the Saudi government and one of the newspaper's staff, was murdered in the Saudi consulate in Istanbul in 2018
https://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-51210743

That is a good question. But the question of whether or not Jeff Bezos’ phone was hacked is more of a discussion of power. And both of these men – Jeff Bezos and Muhammed bin Salmon have been in a competition for a quest for power and money for a very long time. Where does it end? That is a question for the ages. But who is more powerful? It might surprise you to learn that neither of them is.

The alleged Saudi hack of the Amazon founder, Washington Post owner, and world’s richest person Jeff Bezos offers plenty of insight into the nature of power in an era of headlong technological change. Above all, it confirms the insight that the more things change, the more they stay the same.

For those of you who have been on a desert island for the past couple of years, the whole story started back in 2019, when the National Enquirer released emails and photos exposing Bezos’s affair with a Los Angeles television personality. Bezos hinted that Saudi Arabia might have been involved, and he hired a cybersecurity firm to investigate. Last week, the firm released a report tracing the hack to malicious code contained in a WhatsApp message he had received from Saudi Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman, although it remains unclear if this is how the Enquirer obtained the embarrassing information.

If the Saudi government could hack the phone of someone who fully grasps the impact of technology and who has nearly limitless resources with which to protect himself, how can ordinary folks possibly protect themselves from similar intrusions? Only by remaining below the radar and off the grid, and even that approach may not be enough.

Given the heady mix of wealth, sex, celebrity, and politics involved, it’s hardly surprising this one incident has garnered so much attention. But does this event foretell a new global hierarchy, where hackers rule the world and traditional sources of power are increasingly irrelevant? I doubt it.
https://foreignpolicy.com/2020/01/27/who-more-powerful-jeff-bezos-mohammed-bin-salman-mbs-neither-hacking/

That’s it for Top 10 Investigates. Good day.

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[font size="8"]Holy Shit
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Hey everyone! Here’s an unaired Holy Shit that got bumped from Idiots #10-14! Enjoy!

Gather around my fair brothers and sisters! It’s time to take a seat in the pew and pass the collection plate, for the Holy Church Of The Top 10 has convened and it’s time to remind you that the holiest among us are the most full of:



My fair congregation! You know many have tried to write and rewrite the Holy Bible over the years and there have been thousands of interpretations and meanings of it. Now those of you familiar with American history will recall that founding father Thomas Jefferson famously wrote his own version of the Bible and took all the BS out of it, and made it just about JAYSUS and called it “The Teachings Of Jesus Of Nazareth”. See, that’s the kind of interpretation of the Bible we here at the Holy Church Of The Top 10 can get behind! What we’re not OK with is supporters of the unholy, ungodly Dark One – a man who is so disgusting that his name shall not be spoken in my church – twisting their own dark, demented views into the Good Book! But while we’re all for freedom of speech, those like Lee Greenwood are taking a massive dump on everything that our founding fathers stood for!

Faith and patriotism have always been firmly intertwined for Lee Greenwood, so his newest project seems like a perfect fit for the veteran entertainer best known for his iconic anthem “God Bless the USA.” The God Bless the USA Bible will be released in September to commemorate the 20th anniversary of 9/11, and in addition to containing handwritten lyrics, the Bible will also include America’s “Founding Documents”—The Constitution, Bill of Rights, Declaration of Independence and the Pledge of Allegiance.

“It is a regular Bible. It will be leather bound, and it does say Holy Bible on the front,” Greenwood says, describing the new Bible during an interview at his lovely Franklin, TN home. “They are going to tie in ‘God Bless The USA’ and then it has a signature flag at the very bottom. They asked me on the inside cover if I’d write the lyrics for my song ‘God Bless the USA’ showing how faith and patriotism come together and so I did the chorus, ‘I’m proud to be an American, at least I know I’m free’ and so forth. The very back of the Bible, after the text is over, then we have the Declaration of Independence, the Bill of Rights, the Constitution and the Pledge of Allegiance.”

Greenwood is pleased that the Bible will include documents that are so important to our nation’s heritage. “More than anything, it reflects on how we got started as a country, so when people are unfamiliar with those documents, they can at least briefly read through them and understand how this country was thinking when we formed the United States of America, the first 13 colonies, and eventually every state and how we got to where we are today,” he says. “This is a democracy. We can change who runs the country. We can amend the Constitution. We can change anything that pleases the population as we continue to grow as long as we stay together and stay free.”
https://www.soundslikenashville.com/news/lee-greenwood-god-bless-usa-bible/

Nah, instead they’d rather worship mindless symbols and golden calfs. I mean this is the group that literally created a golden statue of their false idol! So now is this a good thing or a bad thing you might ask? Well… we’re indifferent. In fact we’re not touching that one with a 10 foot pole. What we will do instead is mock the ever-loving absurdity of this piece. I mean seriously, Thomas Jefferson and George Washington would be turning over in their graves if they saw this!

Zondervan said that it would not print a Bible subtitled "God Bless the USA," after critics accused the Bible of promoting Christian nationalism and blurs the barriers between the secular and sacred. The person behind the project, however, said the project won't stop despite the backlash.

The special edition Bible is an Elite Source Pro project. Christian singer Lee Greenwood's chart-topping song "God Bless America," reportedly inspired the said new edition and contains copies not only of the text of the Scripture, but the U.S. Constitution, the Bill of Rights, the Declaration of Independence, the Pledge of Allegiance, and the lyrics of Greenwood's song as well. Its promotional site boasts that it's "ideal for taking to the church, a study in the Bible, for working, traveling, etc" and is the "ultimate American Bible."

There were, however, more than 900 signatures on a petition asking Zondervan not to publish it, reports Christian Headlines.

The "God Bless the USA" Bible was described as a "toxic mix" by the petition that "will exacerbate the challenges to American evangelicalism, adding fuel to the Christian nationalism and anti-Muslim sentiments found in many segments of the evangelical church."
https://www.christianitydaily.com/articles/12019/20210529/zondervan-won-t-publish-god-bless-the-usa-bible-but-project-will-continue-with-other-publishers.htm

Now why is this controversial you might ask? Well the answer to that is simple – any time you mix politics and religion together you get controversy. Wait, that’s what we do here! But alas, we are just a mere church performing at a comedy show. But when you mix toxic politics with toxic religion, expect nothing good to come of it! In fact many are saying this Bible will promote Christian nationalism and white supremacy. But wait – isn’t that what most megachurches do anyways?

The “God Bless the USA Bible” is expected to go on sale in September, in time to commemorate the 20th anniversary of the Sept. 11 terrorist attacks, according to a Nashville-based marketer who will distribute the book.

It has already prompted cries of blasphemy and concerns that the book will promote Christian nationalism, the idea that America is and should remain a Christian nation.

The Bible will also include lyrics from singer Lee Greenwood’s hit song “God Bless the USA,” which topped pop charts after Sept. 11, 2001. Using the historic King James Version, the “God Bless the USA Bible” has about 600 preorders for $49.99 and will ship in September, said Hugh Kirkpatrick, who said he wanted to inspire unity in the country.

People in 30 of the 50 states have preordered the Bible, with higher concentration of preorders coming from Pennsylvania, Tennessee, Florida and Texas, said Kirkpatrick, who leads a Nashville company called Elite Source Pro and is in the process of choosing a printer. Kirkpatrick said the Bible is not a response to any movement in particular, including nationwide debates over how the country should talk about its historical founding, such as former president Donald Trump’s panning of the New York Times’ “1619 Project” and an academic movement known as critical race theory.
https://www.phillytrib.com/religion/a-new-bible-that-includes-the-u-s-constitution-attracts-critics-and-customers/article_1debf79e-1dce-5675-88fc-86c67653474d.html

Oh now people, stop your rabbling! And again, we’re not here to judge, we’re only here to mock! So why are people actually flocking to the Lee Greenwood Bible? Well, because hardcore Christians also love American symbols. And there’s nothing more symbolic than a Bible with the title of “God Bless The USA”. As George Carlin would say – “I consider these things to be symbols, and I leave that to the symbol minded!”.

“What we’re trying to do is show children who aren’t being taught about these things, how these things came together,” Kirkpatrick said. “At the bottom line, it was just to let future generations know how this thing called America started it. Why did they lean on? What influence did they have at that time?”

The Bible and government documents have often been weaponized in important debates over America’s history, said Anthea Butler, a professor at the University of Pennsylvania with a new book called “White Evangelical Racism.”

“Even if he didn’t mean it to be, this is one more flashpoint for trying to deal with the contentious points in America’s history,” Butler said.

Putting the Bible and the Constitution together in a book can present the texts as if they are both inspired by God, Butler said.

“You put a document made for a nation up against what many people believe are the words of God and say those things are equal,” Butler said. “Are you telling us these documents are equal? They’re not even meant to be compared. For many Christians, it would be offensive.”
https://www.seattletimes.com/nation-world/nation/new-god-bless-the-usa-bible-that-includes-the-constitution-attracting-critics-customers/

No, sir, that is not how any of this works! In fact you have it all wrong, and our founding fathers would have hated every second of it! And by the way if you’re going to plunk down $39.99 for the Lee Greenwood Bible, why not plunk down $25 for a copy of our Good Book? It’s available in the merchandise booth and has a much better message, we feel! Mass has ended, may you go in peace! That’s it this week for:




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[font size="8"]Beating A Dead Horse: The People Vs In The Heights
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Hey everyone! Here’s an unaired Beating A Dead Horse that got bumped from Idiots #10-15! Enjoy!



Look, we get that people are starting to fight back against “woke” culture because it’s turning completely ridiculous. The latest bout of batshit insanity comes courtesy of the new Lin Manuel Miranda flick “In The Heights”. Now why do you have to come after my boy Lin like that? He only created one of the greatest musicals of the 21st century Hamilton – which featured one of the most diverse casts in Broadway history. But In The Heights? Not so much! Here’s the thing – we’re not here to mock anyone’s race, gender, or social status. We’re all inclusive here. And I get that we’ve all been holed up the last year because of COVID. But if you’re at the point where you’re literally pigeonholing cast members and roles because they’re not diverse enough for you- it is time to put down the bong and back away from the computer, and go outside and get some fresh air, OK?

Every year, Hollywood inevitably comes under criticism for its lack of racial diversity. But another lesser-known yet still pervasive problem also resurfaces: the lack of diversity in skin tone.

It happened again with In the Heights, a big-budget film based on the musical created by Lin-Manuel Miranda, which was called out this week for its dearth of dark-skinned, black Latinos in leading roles.

Colourism – or discrimination against darker-skinned people within their same ethnic group – lurks deep among pretty much all communities with varying levels of melanin. But it doesn't get talked about, and that could be a setback for the racial justice efforts that intensified after the police killing of George Floyd last year.

Avoiding the conversation will hinder the battle for racial justice because the two are “fully and inextricably linked”, said Ellis P Monk, Jr, a sociology professor at Harvard University who has been researching colourism for years.
https://www.thenationalnews.com/arts-culture/film/in-the-heights-has-highlighted-lack-of-diversity-in-skin-tone-in-hollywood-films-1.1244400

So now this is a thing! Seriously this is movie is about a guy in New York City who owns a bodega and wants to escape his monotonous life. You can’t get much more diverse than New York City – a land where you can see beautiful people and batshit crazy people on every corner. So why are people mad at Lin Manuel over this? The best way I can describe this situation is that I call it a “clusterfuck”. Kind of like buying tickets for a John Legend concert, then finding out what his wife did on Twitter several years ago – that’s the appropriate amount of shock for this.

Even in 2021, when “diversity” and “inclusion” are entertainment industry buzzwords, a film with a mostly Latino cast is rare. Although Latinos are 18% of the U.S. population, a study last year by the University of Southern California (USC) found that Latinos made up only 4.9% of speaking roles in top Hollywood films. This disparity is especially glaring considering that, pre-pandemic, Latinos led other ethnic groups in movie-going.

When U.S. audiences do see Latinos portrayed on film, generally they are presented as being in crisis. An earlier University of Southern California study noted that Latinos in movies are often depicted as living in poverty or as criminals. No surprise there; everyone has seen movies with Latino characters trying to cross the border or fleeing from drug cartels. Though most U.S. Latinos (67%) are native-born, on film Latinos seem to be routinely presented as immigrants.

By contrast, “In The Heights” offers a vibrant depiction of the joys and struggles of Latino lives. While it takes place in a predominantly Latino neighborhood, its central conflicts are nonetheless universal. One young character stresses about college, meanwhile her neighbors worry about gentrification. Several characters run their own businesses. “In The Heights” portrays people dealing with love and loss, financial worries and family issues – in short, people with three-dimensional lives.
https://www.usatoday.com/story/opinion/2021/06/10/in-heights-represents-diverse-latino-culture-without-stereotypes/7618539002/

Now look before anyone accuses us of being racist, I just want to point out that we’re not here to debate that. In fact we regularly play a game here called “Is It Racist” and I almost thought about playing this as an “Is It Racist” segment. But here’s the thing, my friends – no matter how diverse you think a movie’s casting is, well, it ain’t diverse enough. To quote the late great Mitch Hedburg – “You can’t please everyone all the time, and last night, all those people were at my show”.

We are thrilled to bring you the Changemakers Issue, honoring the annual Juneteenth holiday and celebrating diverse voices who have a significant impact on the culture through their art, storytelling and activism.

Our cover subject, 23-year-old singer H.E.R., enlists her incredible talents to call out inequality and the need to fight for justice. Her Grammy-winning political anthem, “I Can’t Breathe,” became a signature song for the Black Lives Matter movement in response to the murder of George Floyd. H.E.R. then took home an Oscar for best song for “Fight for You” from the film “Judas and the Black Messiah,” about the assassination of Black Panther Fred Hampton by the FBI and Chicago police.

You also must read about social impact activist Opal Lee, 94, known as the “Grandmother of Juneteenth,” who each year on June 19 makes a two-and-a-half- mile pilgrimage to commemorate the date in 1865 that marked the end of slavery in America.
https://variety.com/2021/film/entertainment-industry/her-opal-lee-in-the-heights-diversity-in-entertainment-1234997730/

Look people, we get that diversity is needed, OK? You don’t have to convince us that here. But is there such a thing as being too diverse? Well… eh, I’m not touching that one with a 10 foot pole. Now here’s a plot twist. You know what movie is getting celebrated for its’ diversity? F9: The Fast Saga! That’s right – the franchise where you go to watch car chases with half-naked women and things getting blown up while Vin Diesel claims the cast that remains at the end of the movie “family” now has a more diverse cast than a Lin Manuel Miranda musical. Yes, folks! This is where we are at in 2021!

Over the weekend, comic book writer Gail Simone shared an interesting anecdote on Twitter about Hollywood, the industry’s growing need for inclusion, and the Fast and Furious movies.

“I had a very powerful Hollywood insider say that the success of the Fast and Furious franchise had a bigger effect on movie casts getting diversified than ‘all the social media complaints combined,’” Simone wrote. “This happened. If he was being hyperbolic I don’t know. But even if it’s just a commonly held belief at the top levels, it’s interesting to consider. It punches [holes] in the beliefs of both conservative and liberal commentators.”

Indeed, it is very interesting to consider, particularly on the social media platform which has become famous for dictating the direction of “discourse” around popular media on any given day. It also brings sharp attention to the unique vitality of the Fast and Furious franchise.

As a series sometimes written off as the silly blockbuster franchise where Dwayne Johnson once threw a torpedo into a submarine, the “Fast Saga” is actually the rare thing in Hollywood: an original property. Not based on a comic book, 1990s animated film, or space opera from 50 years ago, Fast and Furious made the unlikely journey from a B-action movie with a budget of $38 million to a billion-dollar franchise where new installments cost upwards of $250 million. And it built that popularity with a diverse cast from at least the second film—where Tyrese Gibson and Ludacris joined the first movie’s Paul Walker—creating a more inclusive identity for audiences a decade before Marvel Studios’ Phase Two remained still mostly dominated by white talent in front of and behind the camera.
https://www.denofgeek.com/movies/hollywood-credits-fast-and-furious-growing-diversity/

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[font size="8"]Conspiracy Corner
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Hey everyone! Here’s a brand new edition of Conspiracy Corner that we shot just for this Best Of Edition to bring you some new content in our long absence! Enjoy!



Welcome back to our segment that attempts to explain the unexplainable, Conspiracy Corner! We are of course coming to you live from our underground bunker deep in the alkalai flats of the New Mexico badlands – undisclosed location of course! Before you can enter my underground lair, let us first adjust our tin foil hats for maximum government interference. Now this week, of course you know that the former guy was not elected in 2020, shocker I know. But when the former guy left office, so did his dreams of building a wall on the Mexican border. Now, most of us, even conservative republicans, have moved on from this idea. But not in Texas, oh no. In Texas, they are determined to build a wall whether the people of Texas want one or not. Hell, just like buying a new car, they’ve already got the down payment for it!

Sign up for The Brief, our daily newsletter that keeps readers up to speed on the most essential Texas news.

Gov. Greg Abbott on Wednesday announced some new details of his plan for Texas to build its own border wall, starting with the hiring process for a program manager and providing $250 million in state funds as a "down payment."

"Texas will build a border wall in our state to help secure our border," Abbott said.

The governor did not specify how long the wall would be, where it would be built or the total cost of the project, saying that those decisions will need to be determined by a program manager. On Wednesday, Abbott directed the Texas Facilities Commission to hire a program manager to begin that work.

A commitment to building a wall along the entire U.S.-Mexico border was a hallmark of former President Donald Trump’s time in office. His administration built about 450 miles of barrier, mostly in Arizona, according to The Washington Post. But Trump, who is touring the border with Abbott later this month, also met fierce resistance from private property owners unwilling to allow the federal government to build on their land.
https://www.texastribune.org/2021/06/16/texas-border-wall-greg-abbott/

Now that’s what they think the walls are going to do. But make no mistake – this wall isn’t about the people of Texas or the United States. It’s about boosting Gov. Abbott’s presidential hopefuls among the MAGA crowd in 2024, which he already lost to Florida’s Ron DeSantis. But now that he’s got the down payment, how’s he gonna secure the monthly payments? Well the same way they tried to before – with a Kickstarter campaign! I swear, I got to find some way to make money off these idiots.

Texas Gov. Greg Abbott (R) gave more details Wednesday about the wall he wants the state to build along the Mexico border to slow and entrap immigrants. He did not say where the wall will be built or how much it will cost, but he and other Republican officials tapped state funds for a $250 million "down payment" to hire a project manager who will make those decisions. The wall will cost "far more than $250 million," Abbott conceded. He also pledged to build more jails along the Mexico border to house immigrants he said Texas will arrest.

The Supreme Court ruled 5-3 in 2012 that states can't enforce immigration law, but Abbott told the conservative podcast Ruthless on Tuesday that state police will arrest immigrants for other violations. The wall "sets up a crime," he explained. "Anybody coming across the border who in any way tries to damage that fence, they are guilty of two crimes," vandalism and trespassing, both of which are treated as higher-level offenses under an emergency declaration Abbott issued earlier in June. "We will be putting these people in jail for a long time," he said.

Abbott may also be counting on a more conservative Supreme Court overturning its 2012 precedent, the Houston Chronicle reports.

President Biden, who halted his predecessor's federal wall construction, recently returned more than $2 billion the Trump administration siphoned from the Pentagon for the project. The Homeland Security Department also said it's reviewing border land the Trump administration confiscated through eminent domain over the past year and "will work to return the land to its prior owners," when appropriate.
https://news.yahoo.com/texas-governor-redirects-250-million-044443775.html

I don’t think it fits right enough. So you might be wondering – who the hell is going to allow their property to be ravaged by this border wall? And let’s not forget that the poorly planned one that Trump started was already destroying landscapes across the US – Mexican border. Well let’s turn to this one rancher in the border town of Roma, Texas. He loves the idea of the wall so much that he’s allowing it to be built on his land. Now this is what will lower your property values by 75%, take note of that!

One landowner on the border said that human and drug trafficking activity has increased in recent months and believes that a state-funded border wall is a good idea.

Richard Guerra owns 5,000 acres of land in Roma, Texas, and herds cattle at his ranch, La Anacua Ranch Inc. He told KVEO that on Wednesday the Department of Homeland Security and Border Patrol briefed him on some possible new changes.

“They were briefing us on some of the ideas that the governor has that they want to implement,” said Guerra. “They’re starting to maybe form committees to look into various aspects to what it’s going to take to do to build the wall or acquire the land.”

Guerra said that he was included in the meeting because he owns land in Starr County, but there are no official plans yet.

“A lot of that has legal ramifications for them and that hasn’t been worked out—as far as I know—that hasn’t been worked out,” said Guerra.
https://www.valleycentral.com/news/local-news/rancher-in-favor-of-texas-border-wall-considers-volunteering-land-for-its-construction/

Now you might be wondering – is this even legal? Well here’s where the situation gets tricky and where it could present a legal challenge. And it’s also where the story dives head first into conspiracy territory, and that’s where we come in! Also raises the question of who’s going to pay for it? Well it’s not Mexico, it’s going to be Texas. And Abbott’s most fervent supporters don’t seem to care. By the way, doesn’t Texas have a crippling power issue to deal with before they build a symbol of unnecessary conservative arrogance? And by the way, they literally proved on Jan. 6th that walls don’t work.

Gov. Greg Abbott’s announcement Thursday that Texas would build a border wall to stem the flow of migrants through its southern border has sparked denunciations, confusion and threats of legal action.

“States don’t have authority over immigration and our borders, that’s a federal authority,” said Domingo Garcia, national president of the League of United Latin American Citizens. “It’s not constitutional and we’re planning to challenge it in court once we see the final order.”

At a self-styled border summit in Del Rio, Abbott announced that he would unveil plans next week for the state to begin building a border wall but gave no additional details on where it would be built or how the state would pay for it.

Former President Donald Trump ran on the promise of building a wall along the U.S.-Mexico border. The Trump administration completed 458 miles of the border wall, according to U.S. Customs and Border Protection statistics from this year, including in parts of Texas, but the federal government faced multiple lawsuits over its construction.

Trump also promised that Mexico would pay for the wall. Instead, American taxpayers paid for the $15 billion project, which included repairing existing border walls and new construction. Still, Trump supporters have continued to call for its construction.
https://www.texastribune.org/2021/06/11/texas-border-wall/

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[font size="8"]People Are Dumb
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Jackson L. from Tallahassee, Florida writes:

“Hey Top 10, I’m a democrat in the Florida panhandle. I know you guys love to pick on Florida a lot, but why?”

We don’t hate Florida, we love Florida! It’s easy to make fun of because there’s just so many batshit crazy people in this state. In fact, we tour Florida regularly and are looking forward to coming back later this year! That said, here’s a new edition of People Are Dumb with lots of the crazy Florida goodness that you all know and love!

Hit it!

Of course you know by now that people are people, and people are dumb. I want to start with the Korean boy band BTS. These guys are going to take over the freaking world. They already own our social media feeds, now they’re coming for our fast food. But no matter how much you may claim to love this band, everyone can agree that this is ridiculous, right? And what happened? Someone paid $100,000 for a chicken nugget. I will repeat that: someone paid $100,000 for a chicken nugget, because it looks like a video game character, but is made even more expensive because it also kind of looks like a member of the boy band BTS. But really would you expect nothing less from the batshit crazy world that we live in? I know I for one wouldn’t pay that kind of money for a chicken nugget. That’s just pure insanity.

A lone chicken nugget shaped like a character from the game “Among Us” that came in a limited-edition McDonald’s meal has reached eBay infamy after it sold for nearly $99,997.

In the early hours of Friday morning, the unassuming nugget was officially sold on eBay following a wild bidding war. After it was originally listed on May 28 for only 99 cents, a bidder upped the ante two days later— for reasons unknown — by offering a whopping $14,969.69. Did that bidder have information about this little nug that we don’t? Is that very specific number code for something?

Regardless of any possible chicken nugget intel, the processed piece of meat’s rags-to-riches tale is undoubtedly due to its shape. The nugget resembles a crewmate from the video game “Among Us,” which surged in popularity in September 2020 and may have been the product of our shared boredom during this once-in-a-lifetime pandemic. With two legs and a round top, it’s hard not to recognize the distinct figure.

The video game has followed the nugget bidding saga closely and at one point asked McDonald’s to send one over.
https://nowthisnews.com/pop/a-chicken-nugget-sold-for-nearly-100000-on-ebay-yes-really

That is a good question, sir! Next up – we go to this story out of Texas. And look people, remember the movie Freaky Friday where a mom and a daughter switched bodies and personalities? Well this is one case where this didn’t really work out well. And oh wait – this almost never works, and Freaky Friday was just a movie. But this is just plain stupid on multiple levels.

Deputies with the El Paso County Sheriff’s Office arrested Casey Garcia, 30, of San Elizario, after the woman was accused by the local school district of trespassing on school grounds posing as a student.

The San Elizario Independent School district notified the sheriff’s office about the incident on June 1.

Deputies were also alerted to several social media posts circulating online which allegedly documented the incident.

One of the videos is titled, “Going to school as my 13yr old daughter (Middle School edition).”

Read the rest at: https://www.kwtx.com/2021/06/04/texas-mother-charged-after-sneaking-into-school-pretending-be-daughter/

Next up – of course we have to go to the Sunshine State, the great State of Florida, or as Homer Simpson famously referred to it as “America’s Wang”. Of course we love Florida here, we kid we kid! And we have to go to the town of Naples for this one. And here’s the thing people – don’t drink and drive under any circumstances! Doesn’t matter what kind of vehicle you are riding, but don’t do it! and yes, you can get DUI on a boat!

A Florida man was arrested Tuesday after a boat crashed into the Gordon River Bridge around 9 p.m. in Naples.

Joseph Turner, 35, is facing a misdemeanor charge of disorderly intoxication after police said he jumped from the boat onto the bridge after he was repeatedly told not to, according to the Naples Police Department.

The boat, named ‘Double Sunshine,’ had gotten trapped against the bridge near the 1200 block of 5th Avenue S because of a strong tide, investigators said.

People on the boat were jumping from the boat’s top deck onto the bridge, the boat’s captain told police. ..............(more)

https://nbc-2.com/news/crime/2021/06/09/drunk-florida-man-arrested-after-boat-crashes-into-naples-bridge/

Next up – you know the old saying don’t bring a gun to a knife fight. Well in this case, don’t bring a scooter to a Lamborghini fight. Yes, you know Lamborghini – the makers of exotic sports cars that you will never be able to afford as long as you live. I mean come on, I host this show and I will never be able to afford one! But if your $300,000 sports car is stolen, maybe don’t chase it with a scooter. Though to be fair, that could be done in LA traffic. Maybe not so much in Florida!

Andre Kalinine said he was sitting on his porch in Miami Beach when the teen ran to him and admitted stealing the vehicle.

“He said, ‘I stole a Lamborghini just now,’” Kalinine told WSVN. “‘I don’t have a license. I can’t drive.’ I didn’t know if he had a weapon. I wasn’t sure how crazy he was. I was trying to talk and calm him down. He asked me for advice. He’s like, ‘I’m 14. I don’t know what to do.’ ‘(I said) you’re better off turning yourself in. They’re going to go much, much easier on you.’”

Moments after Kalinine spoke to the teenager, police officers arrived to take him into custody.

“An officer on the other side of the fence had a gun pointing at both of us,” Kalinine told the television station.

Sander eventually drove his Lamborghini home.

Snip...

https://www.wsbtv.com/news/trending/florida-man-jumps-scooter-chase-teen-who-stole-his-lamborghini/HAABKOB4X5ABTNE3HLGWHSJS7Y/

Finally this week – you know I love a good fast food rage story. I collect them and trade them with my friends, like baseball cards. And this is a good one. Come on, give me a story where a woman calls 911 because McDonalds ran out of Big Macs, and I’m a happy guy! Well this is a good one. I love a good bagel, especially one loaded with cream cheese, and maybe some smoked salmon on top. But you know what I’ve never done? Pulled a gun on someone because they forgot my cream cheese! Where’s Walter Sobchak when you need him?

Police say an angry Florida man pulled a gun on a drive-thru worker because they forget the cream cheese with his bagel. The employee just happened to be the daughter of the Miami Gardens police chief.

Police say the man became angry at a Starbucks drive-thru when they messed up his order earlier this week.

According to an arrest report, he returned to the window, screaming at the employee and pulled out a gun.

The employee says the man shouted threats but did not point the gun at her.

The suspect is charged with aggravated assault with a firearm. He was being held on a $10,000 bond.
https://www.wfla.com/news/florida/police-man-pulled-gun-on-chiefs-daughter-over-cream-cheese/

That’s it this week for:

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[font size="8"]Keeping Up With The Candidates Ep. 12: Beto’s Gun Policy
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From: Idiots #7-17

Megan F. from Gary, Indiana writes:

“Hey Top 10, is there any chance that the 2022 midterms are going to be as batshit crazy as the 2020 election?”

Good question Megan! The answer to that is: we don’t know. We’re sure that the Former Guy will have his slimy mitts in some elections and some Q Anon people might get elected. But as long as there’s candidates like Tulsi Gabbard at the helm, our jobs are secure!



Welcome back to our guide to the mother of all elections to end elections until the remainder of time in 2020, Keeping Up With The Candidates. Last week we discussed the breaking news about how Tulsi Gabbard might be being groomed as a Russian agent. Or a republican one. Or she might tell both to fuck off and go third party. Yeah that would be the absolute worst response to that. Kind of like getting into a car accident and telling your insurance company you did it for the LULZ. Yeah that never works. OK enough of that. We have to talk about America’s 800 pound gorilla in the room and that’s guns. What are we going to do about America’s gun violence epidemic? There’s only one man out of the 24 who has the balls to take on the NRA, and that’s Texas’ Beto O’Rourke. He has a very controversial plan to end gun violence, but what is it? We will take a look and see!

Beto O'Rourke dismissed criticisms of his sweeping gun control proposal, telling CBS News in an interview Thursday night that he expects gun owners will go along with his plan to institute a "mandatory buyback" of high-powered rifles.

"If we're able to pass mandatory buybacks and I'm able to sign that into law, then I fully expect our fellow Americans to turn in their AR-15s and their AK-47s," the former Texas congressman said.

O'Rourke's "mandatory buyback" plan, which would force gun owners to surrender high-powered rifles like the AR-15 and the AK-47, has been criticized as impractical by other candidates in the race. South Bend Mayor Pete Buttigieg, for example, has said that O'Rourke's plan amounts to "confiscation."

Buttigieg and O'Rourke sparred over their gun views at the most recent Democratic debate earlier this month. Buttigieg, who backs more traditional gun control measures like universal background checks, dismissed O'Rourke's idea as a "purity test" and a "shiny object." In a jab back at Buttigieg, O'Rourke said that Democrats should not base their opinions on polling and what consultants say.
https://www.cbsnews.com/news/beto-orourke-says-he-expects-americans-to-surrender-their-guns/

Seriously, good luck with that! I am definitely not poo pooing the idea, but have you seen the comments posted on gun threads, Beto? The most hardcore gun nutters definitely aren’t putting down their weapons that easily. Yeah I know it’s a comments section – the bathroom stall wall of the internet, and by the way – let us know what you think in the comments! Stay on target, stay on target! But what is specifically involved in this thing?

Former Rep. Beto O'Rourke struggled to explain on Wednesday how he would make people who wish to do harm with an assault-style weapon to comply with his proposed mandatory gun buyback, a plan that divided Democrats at Tuesday's primary debate hosted by CNN and The New York Times.

O'Rourke's plan includes a ban on assault-style weapons and for the federal government to buy back firearms, including AK-47s and AR-15s, for a "fair price" -- or otherwise face a fine.

Pressed by CNN's Alisyn Camerota Wednesday on how he planned to get assault-style weapons from people who would be reluctant to hand them over, O'Rourke, a former US representative from Texas, insisted that Americans would abide by the law.

"It's pretty simple. As with any law in this country, we would expect our fellow Americans to follow the law," O'Rourke said on CNN's "New Day."
https://www.cnn.com/2019/10/16/politics/beto-orourke-mandatory-buyback-proposal-cnntv/index.html

Yeah I think Stewie is the perfect example of someone who should not be allowed to own a gun because you know he won’t use it for good! But a mandatory program Beto? You are really going there? I’m not saying no one should have guns and I’m not touching that one with a 10 foot pole. But here’s the problem with a mandatory gun buy back program: the keyword “mandatory”. Yeah some gun nutters, that’s exactly what they want, and they’re not going down without a fight!

If Tuesday night’s Democratic presidential debate decided anything, it was that Texas dodged a bullet — literally — when it failed to elect Beto O’Rourke to the U.S. Senate last year.

Ever since August’s devastating mass shooting at an El Paso Walmart, the former congressman has made promoting comprehensive gun control his raison d’etre.

That isn’t surprising or even problematic, really. Progressive Democrats have long capitalized on national tragedies in their effort to promote gun restrictions, even as there is no clear evidence that mass shootings are on the rise.

And, in fairness, the horrific nature of the El Paso shooting probably warranted a strong response from its former representative in Congress. Even some prominent conservatives have made the case for gun reforms in its wake, advocating policy proposals such as red-flag laws. Other Republicans have indicated an openness to strengthening background checks.

But O’Rourke has gone much further in his gun control advocacy, declaring on the debate stage in Houston last month, “Hell yes, we’re going to take your AR-15, your AK-47. We’re not going to allow it to be used against our fellow Americans anymore.”
https://www.star-telegram.com/opinion/cynthia-m-allen/article236352388.html

Yeah really, while you’re concerned about vaping, there’s plenty of people who are armed to the teeth that will kill you before inhaling a lifetime of electronic smoke will do! This is why Beto’s gun buyback policy is a good idea in theory but would have a near impossible time working in real life. By the way if you want to see how an actual gun buyback program, here’s how Japan handled the situation. And you know what? Japan has the lowest number of shootings in the entire world!

Gun control discussions crop up every time there is an attention-grabbing shooting in the US. On Wednesday, a 19-year-old allegedly shot dozens of his former classmates at a Florida high school, leaving 17 of them dead.

One of the biggest questions: How does the US prevent this from happening over and over again?

Although the US has no exact counterpart elsewhere in the world, some countries have taken steps that can provide a window into what successful gun control looks like. Japan, a country of 127 million people and yearly gun deaths rarely totaling more than 10, is one such country.

"Ever since guns entered the country, Japan has always had strict gun laws," Iain Overton, executive director of Action on Armed Violence, a British advocacy group, told the BBC. "They are the first nation to impose gun laws in the whole world, and I think it laid down a bedrock saying that guns really don't play a part in civilian society."
https://www.businessinsider.com/gun-control-how-japan-has-almost-completely-eliminated-gun-deaths-2017-10

[font size="4"]Next Week:[/font]

Next week we’re going to check in with the Bernie Sanders camp and find out what his latest chances of winning the election are after his recent health crisis!



See everyone on July 15th for the start of season 11!

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