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Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsFox "news" has destroyed my family
I had a conversation with my grandparents today.
They told me Ashley Babbit was shot while talking on her cell phone.
They believe the election was stolen, so the January 6th terrorists were justified. And since there were no guns, it was all peachy keen.
When I mentioned the police who were beaten by the terrorist my grandmother said " that didn't happen"
I come from a strong Democratic family. I was raised by these very same people that Republicans were terrible, corrupt, and liars.
My first presidential vote was for Al Gore.
In the last 10 years, the patriarch and matriarch of the family became housebound. Fox news is on 247 at their house.
I love these people. Disinformation and lies have brain washed them.
I hate fox and I hate the divide they have caused within my family.
Hugh_Lebowski
(33,643 posts)If my family weren't pretty much all liberal I'm pretty sure I'd be totally estranged from them, because I'd refuse to keep my mouth shut, and would eventually end up telling them they're all fucking idiots living in a total fantasy world.
If you can avoid that situation with your grandparents, you are doing really well in my book
berniesandersmittens
(11,323 posts)My grandparents got me interested in politics from an early age. We watched tv on election nights and always rooted for the Democrat.
We watched the national conventions and electoral college counts.
They taught me tolerance and social equality.
It's really difficult to see this extreme change in them.
I just know when to walk away.
Ligyron
(7,592 posts)Im not sure propaganda alone can explain the drastic changes Ive observed in some formally liberal people.
Sometimes I think the Russians I have helped them with subliminal messaging of some sort that were just not aware of.
lagomorph777
(30,613 posts)You may be right that there's some subtle technology involved in flipping the insanity switch in viewers' brains.
zanana1
(6,084 posts)Imagine that when Bush v. Gore happened, CNN was telling us that the election had been rigged and that Al Gore had really won. I was angry about the outcome when they had to stop counting the votes. It wouldn't have been hard to convince me that a conspiracy had taken place.
Then imagine that all you ever watched was Fox News and saw newsclips of Republican congressmen telling you that the election was rigged and that Trump had really won.
Well, I try.
Ohioboy
(3,222 posts)Why didn't Al Gore push that the 2000 election was stolen? He had more reasons than Trump ever had for not conceding. Gore only lost by 1 electoral vote that was determined by one state that was heavily biased against him. Gore won the popular vote, receiving 543,895 more votes (a margin of 0.52% of all votes cast)! Why didn't Gore do what Trump did?
What Trump did takes "followers". CNN is not an all -out propaganda machine like FOX and other right-wing media. Left leaning media doesn't spend their time making "followers" out their viewers.
lagomorph777
(30,613 posts)The thing is, it's not just the Big Lie about the election. It's a steady stream of hate and lies on every topic. Decent people are turned off and disgusted by hatred, and it makes us automatically distrust anything from that source. It seems that Reptilians are either pre-disposed to enjoy the hatred, or something weird has been done to their brains to make them enjoy the hatred. Then they are pre-disposed to believe the lies.
wcmagumba
(2,871 posts)There should be some kind of huge class action suit against them for all the pain and destruction they have caused over the years with their lies and hate speech...
berniesandersmittens
(11,323 posts)Their propaganda has split our country in two.
And now they condone the Jan 6 terrorists?
Purposely omitting the video evidence, proving Babbit was crawling through a broken window with a backpack?
It's like two different realities.
Evolve Dammit
(16,632 posts)That said, I'm sorry for your loss. I have lost multiple family members this way. It is the new civil war, and Faux started it 20 years ago along with AM hate radio, 24/7.
pazzyanne
(6,518 posts)calimary
(80,693 posts)Youll find them out in the wilderness crowding around their golden calf.
Evolve Dammit
(16,632 posts)BlueSky3
(496 posts)In my understanding, most estrangement comes from one party doing something to another. But in the case of Fox News, it seems to be an outside influence « causing » one party to offend the other by spouting FOX views.
Could there be a class action lawsuit against FOX or other media?
Dream Girl
(5,111 posts)berniesandersmittens
(11,323 posts)We should be on every pundit's show to speak truth.
It's all so damned maddening and I wish they could just be fined or taken off the air for their lies.
FakeNoose
(32,328 posts)Faux Noise deserves to be banned. It has destroyed us.
I hope Rupert Murdoch dies a slow and agonizing death - very soon.
berniesandersmittens
(11,323 posts)XanaDUer2
(10,327 posts)who became full-blown lunatic thanks to rw media. He had a great union. Lived on the beach in a government run co-op.
A total racist, paranoid nut
berniesandersmittens
(11,323 posts)Im their part time caretaker. They are both in bad health and going downhill fast.
I just try to remember the good they taught me and that I love them.
Then I come home and cry because I miss the people they once were.
XanaDUer2
(10,327 posts)MustLoveBeagles
(11,563 posts)That's got to be tough. Fox and RW media has caused so much damage to this country. I don't know if you've seen The Brainwashing of my Dad. If you haven't I urge you to do so.
Pepsidog
(6,252 posts)Chilling statement my Chomsky, Germany went from the most civilized country to the most barbaric within a pweiod of 10 years.
MustLoveBeagles
(11,563 posts)My maternal grandparents were children when this happened. They immigrated to the US in the early fifties with the help of an American sponsor along with their three children (mom was a baby) and became citizens in the late fifties. Grandpa loved the US as a child as it gave him hope that things could be better else ware. My grandparents (both sets) and mom would be heartbroken and angry to see the state of the country now.
FM123
(10,050 posts)I remember reading an article from a few years back about this kind of thing happening more and more...
https://nymag.com/intelligencer/2019/04/i-gathered-stories-of-people-transformed-by-fox-news.html
berniesandersmittens
(11,323 posts)This modern divide is digging deeper. Fox is the instigating culprit. They provide the platform for conspiracies and outright falsehoods.
mountain grammy
(26,568 posts)mcar
(42,206 posts)Is there any way you can block Fox on their TV? I've read that helps.
Croney
(4,646 posts)Cinnamonspice
(163 posts)They're still adults making their own crappy choices.
KentuckyWoman
(6,666 posts)Thankfully, you understand the dynamic and can love them regardless. Not everyone can do that.
Your grandparents are lucky to have you.
berniesandersmittens
(11,323 posts)Croney
(4,646 posts)of elderly relatives and used parental controls to block Faux News. But when I flipped through channels to where it had been, the screen announced in all-caps that the station was blocked by parental controls.
So I put it back. The best I could do was switch the default channel from Faux to CNN -- so every time the TV is turned on, it starts on CNN. They never noticed to this day, and I've never seen them look for Faux when I'm there.
Fox has become so prolific in auto service stations, gyms, etc., it seems like it must be a choice. But what if it's the default that so many elderly people don't even know they have a choice in.
Well done.
kimbutgar
(20,871 posts)Once Dramatically backing out a door doing a exorcist cross with my fingers! I got some good laughs.
berniesandersmittens
(11,323 posts)They would be suspicious and angry if their precious were to disappear without warning.
Setting CNN as default is brilliant. Before they noticed, they would get at least some exposure to facts.
FoxNewsSucks
(10,375 posts)I realized that over 15 years ago. The gym I went to had the Fox "news" Sewer on several TVs . I had the same brand of TV at home and started keeping the remote in my bag so I could change the channels. At the time, Cox Cable lineup was 24-27 were news channels, 28-33 were ESPN type sports channels. I used my remote on the tv in the lounge area to block Fox, and realized that with a couple hard-core exceptions, most people who use the tv buttons to change channels were going back and forth between news and sports. Fox just happened to be the first news channel. Other than those two fox-lovers, everyone else would just watch the first news channel.
Now I have an infrared dongle that plugs into the USB port of my phone and turns it into a universal remote. I never leave Fox on any public tv.
spooky3
(34,300 posts)Richard58
(239 posts)The gym I go to has mini TV screens in front of all the exercise equipment. They have like 75 channels to choose from. But I noticed when I first started going there that they had a lot of right-wing news channels on. They had OAN, Fox and some other one that I can't remember off hand. No MSNBC or PBS or anything like that. I complained and asked for more diversity in the news programs. Surprisingly they obliged. They got rid of OAN and replaced it with MSNBC. And the third right wing channel is gone too. It was replaced with the Food Network. So sometimes it helps to complain.
Stuart G
(38,357 posts)berniesandersmittens
(11,323 posts)Mickju
(1,794 posts)It is a tragedy.
berniesandersmittens
(11,323 posts)Funtatlaguy
(10,855 posts)I suspected some of them were closet racists. Trump and Fox revealed them as such. So sad.
kimbutgar
(20,871 posts)But it must be so sad to see your grandparents caught up In the hate cult.
Too bad you couldnt block Fox on their tvs and put a child lock password on their TV.
demigoddess
(6,640 posts)continued the brainwashing technique on tv. Don't really blame them. They just listened to a news channel and didn't expect the brainwashing.
70sEraVet
(3,430 posts)The same folks who trusted Walter Cronkite and Hunter and Brinkley are now lapping up Hannity and Carlson!
Thunderbeast
(3,377 posts)Goodnight Chet
Goodnight David
and Goodnight from NBC News
Dreampuff
(778 posts)I know what you were saying about fox. We also have relatives who just don't seem to get it and they listen to that rhetoric day after day.
My theory is still that we need to bring back the fairness Doctrine. I would hope it would take care of this huge division caused by lies.
Remember to add Newsmax and OAN to that list. I lost a long time friend who was addicted to oan and neither of us could take it anymore. Many, many years down the drain, unfortunately.
MarineCombatEngineer
(12,092 posts)it only applied to over the air broadcasts, not cable, satellite nor internet.
The FCC has no authority to regulate content on those 3 venues, as it should be.
The difference between over the air broadcasts and cable, satellite and internet is over the air is free while one has to pay for the other 3.
If you don't like what's on, then the simple solution is to change the channel or turn it off.
Easy peasy.
To paraphrase the late great George Carlin: There are 2 knobs on the TV, one to change the channel, and one to turn it off, imagine that, you can control what you watch.
https://www.bing.com/videos/search?q=george+carlin%2c+2+knobs+on+the+radio&&view=detail&mid=383B825F0EB002A3B6BB383B825F0EB002A3B6BB&rvsmid=63F1A887BE099689BA9F63F1A887BE099689BA9F&FORM=VDQVAP
Dukkha
(7,341 posts)When people are given freedom of choice they will always make the wrong choice. Always.
It's not about choosing to turn it off it's about stopping the propaganda from indoctrinating people who leave it on 24/7.
MarineCombatEngineer
(12,092 posts)that's one of the things that makes this country great, IMO.
And it is highly realistic.
So your solution is to take away freedom of choice?
You would rather have the govt. decide what people can watch?
tirebiter
(2,520 posts)Dont announce it or ask permission. Itll be our secret.
keithsw
(436 posts)How this happens? are people just stupid? naive? gullible? I don't get it. I could watch Fox all day, every day and never change the way i think. It's so perplexing to me
The Wizard
(12,482 posts)is anti American brain poison. Are the Murdochs doing Putin's dirty work?
snowybirdie
(5,190 posts)We oldsters are the liberal minority, and many of our grandchildren, who live in the south, think were nuts! Sad for you. Understand your pain.
Crunchy Frog
(26,548 posts)If you haven't already seen it, you should check out a movie called "The Brainwashing of my Father". It describes a situation somewhat similar to your own, and how they were eventually able to "deprogram" him.
I believe that many fundamentally good and decent people in this country have been transformed into cultists by probably the biggest and most sophisticated propaganda machinery to have been engineered in human history.
It's criminal what this has done to human relations and families in our country.
I hope you are able to find some kind of healing.
appalachiablue
(41,047 posts)of My Dad,' (2016) covers what you write about-- the scary transformation of her father's political views to the hard right after many years of being sane!
Her dad began following extreme TV 'news' programming that started in the late 1970s and 1980s with deregulation. Ultra right, propaganda, opinion, not 'news.'
Since then Hate Radio talkers have exploded, and Fox cable TV which began mid- 80s is huge.
It's a well done film, find more clips and the *Full Movie on YouTube.
If any film should be available on DVD, esp. for seniors who don't always use the internet, it's this movie. But I don't know if a DVD copy is available, maybe try Amazon online.
Good luck, it's a tough and sadly common situation with many families.
appalachiablue
(41,047 posts)The movie is available to purchase from Amazon online if interested- $20 New, from $12.88 Used.
https://www.amazon.com/Brainwashing-My-Dad-Matthew-Modine/dp/B01HU9KXW8/ref=sr_1_3?dchild=1&keywords=%27The+Brainwashing+of+My+Dad%27&qid=1626051419&s=tv&sr=1-3
ShazzieB
(15,952 posts)When my dad died in 1988, Fux Noise didn't exist yet. They were just getting started the year my mom passed away (1996). I am so glad neither of them were exposed to it, and I shudder to think what effects it might have had on them, especially my mom.
My sister is a "born again" Christian, and as such, leans politically conservative. There aren't many things we see eye to eye on.
andym
(5,441 posts)Then share with them Fox News' story as a propaganda station from any number of mainstream sources, preferably ones they used to believe.
https://www.thenation.com/article/archive/fox-news-propaganda-eric-alterman/
https://www.mercurynews.com/2021/06/08/we-turned-so-far-right-we-went-crazy-how-fox-news-was-radicalized-by-its-own-viewers/
https://www.theguardian.com/media/2019/oct/25/fox-news-watching-what-i-learned
https://www.rollingstone.com/politics/politics-news/how-roger-ailes-built-the-fox-news-fear-factory-244652/
Aussie105
(5,211 posts)There's your problem right there.
Plus the gullibility of some folk.
Who said Fox was actually reflecting reality, it's not a 'news' service, and who said it needs to be soaked up as fact?
I've watched Fox once or twice, for brief periods.
The amount of reality distortion and non-reality some can wrap up in one sentence is unbelievable.
5 minutes of that, and my brain started to hurt.
No one is immune to that level of brainwashing, really.
(Fortunately, there are other channels . . . and my favorite remote button, the OFF button.)
Turbineguy
(37,206 posts)Kaleva
(36,145 posts)Is it because they liked what Fox put out as news?
I believe that most all of us here at DU could watch Fox News most every day and we wouldn't become "brainwashed" because our developed and informed worldview would cause us to reject what Fox News puts out.
oldsoftie
(12,409 posts)I've seen/heard Fox & Limbaugh for YEARS at two of my bigger customers offices. Sometimes for a couple hrs at a time several days a week. Never changed my opinion of Trump. Or anything else.
Kaleva
(36,145 posts)oldsoftie
(12,409 posts)Kaleva
(36,145 posts)ymetca
(1,182 posts)You mean that crisis actor, who isn't even dead? Everybody knows she was an Antifa plant, man. Wow, you are SO out of the loop!
Every time I converse with these folks and I just dump wilder conspiracy nuggets into the mix, spinning it as far into absurdity as I can go, until they either figure out I'm making fun of them, or they shuffle off, muttering to themselves.
The best way to short-circuit a conspiracy narrative is to extend it to its most illogical extremes.
But then, maybe this too is all part of the conspiracy, right?
Kaleva
(36,145 posts)Blue Owl
(49,902 posts)AllaN01Bear
(17,346 posts)were ruined by fox. along with sinclair radio.
DemUnleashed
(633 posts)I absolutely HATE what Fox News has done to this country!!!
pansypoo53219
(20,906 posts)only my bro + my paternal unit fux gnewz heads. tho my cousin has turned out to be half idiot.
Warpy
(110,900 posts)There are just some things I don't want to discuss with people, either the nearest and darest (who are gone now) or strangers. Religion and politics head the list. The Navy added sex to that. If I wanted to keep any sort of relationship with close family, those were off limits. If I want to keep any illusions at all about friendly acquaintances, those topics have to go.
If people don't respect that, I'll just walk away, hang up the phone. I'll get back in contact later and ask if they're done and change the subject. Most people will get the point pretty quickly.
Your grandparents aren't going to be around forever, and most likely not much longer. They raised you right and only slipped down the rabbit hole of fear and hate later. You can dare them to switch to CNN for a week, which they probably won't, or you can go Emily Post from the get go.
You can't change this, you'll only make them defensive. Best thing is to cut it off at the pass so that you don't end up a target for rants and as a rhetorical punching bag.
hadEnuf
(2,149 posts)and brainwash people with anti-American propaganda 24/7/365.
There was a time not very long ago when that would have never been tolerated in this country.
MarineCombatEngineer
(12,092 posts)Really? When was that?
hadEnuf
(2,149 posts)Prior to using the 1A to justify brainwashing people with propaganda.
MarineCombatEngineer
(12,092 posts)I think you're wrong, but, ok.
hadEnuf
(2,149 posts)try and be somewhat objective. The problem for the right was that their narrative mostly failed in a fair forum, so instead they bought the forum. It has gone from "their opinion" to blatantly lying and passing off what they say as news facts. Their format literally brainwashes their viewers that there is an alternative world of facts, that other Americans are the evil enemy and that these "non-Americans" are now worthy of their violence. Sorry, but this is textbook 1930's Nazi Party propaganda stuff.
Freedom of speech is always allowed but it also carries responsibility and accountability with it. One is free to falsely scream fire in a crowded movie theater causing 10 people to get trampled, but the judge isn't going to take free speech as a defense. We are at that point with right wing media as well.
appalachiablue
(41,047 posts)DVD Copy: 'The Brainwashing of My Dad' On AMAZON,
The movie is available to purchase from Amazon online if interested- $20 New, from $12.88 Used.
https://www.amazon.com/Brainwashing-My-Dad-Matthew-Modine/dp/B01HU9KXW8/ref=sr_1_3?dchild=1&keywords=%27The+Brainwashing+of+My+Dad%27&qid=1626051419&s=tv&sr=1-3
ItsjustMe
(11,163 posts)A filmmaker explores the right-wing media machine that changed her WW2 vet, Democrat father into a raging fanatic via immersion in their broadcasts.
https://tubitv.com/movies/518937/the-brainwashing-of-my-dad
Progressive Jones
(6,011 posts)His shift from Center-Left was swift and hard.
He swung to the right when President Obama was elected. He didn't dislike Obama. It was about "Our nation's future".
He said he changed over the "coming onslaught" of "socialism leading to communism".
He was also dating a nice woman at the time who was very progressive. I actually got to know her pretty well.
As soon as his big shift happened, that relationship ended. She said he'd "gone off the rails", and she couldn't
deal with him any more.
He calls me a "Marxist" every chance he gets, and parrots every rightie talking point he comes across.
He may also be a Q Flake. Not sure yet.
Jon King
(1,910 posts)Same exact dynamic.
Liberty Belle
(9,528 posts)by the mob, including one who had his head slammed in a door.
oldsoftie
(12,409 posts)SHOW the cops getting crushed.
And ask why they no longer "Back the Blue"
jcmaine72
(1,773 posts)I hold them as much accountable for 1/6 as Dotard. How is this not sedition? Incitement to violence is not covered under the First Amendment.
3catwoman3
(23,812 posts)
over the edge?
Have you ever asked them about their change of heart? Are they aware that they have changed?
Switching from liberal/compassionate to hard-hearted and hateful just makes no sense to me. To change from seeing the light to seeing the darkness seems like going backwards.
How sad for you.
Beartracks
(12,761 posts)I am very sorry for your loss.
======
cate94
(2,797 posts)My nephew visited him and put in parental controls. It worked.
seta1950
(932 posts)At the drs waiting room they had Fox News blaring, I asked the person behind the counter to lower the volume.
es466
(113 posts)Along with many many others. I truly believe that Fox "News" and right wing hate radio have become actual addictions for some.
madaboutharry
(40,147 posts)was during the Elian Gonzalez saga. I watched it for about 20 minutes during which time a parade of republicans were telling lies about Elians father and Rupert Murdoch had a banner celebrating Elians Escape to Freedom.
I thought What is this shit?
And then I thought about how terribly and deeply dangerous this kind of reporting was to to the American people.
SleeplessinSoCal
(8,992 posts)My mother has been convinced she knows so much more than us and that Democrats are bad. She used to be a Democrat.
May I recommend Buspar. It's a sedative. My mother has been on it for over 6 months and apparently it's made her not want to watch FNC lately.
P.S. I just saw it's in short supply. Not surprised.
Dial H For Hero
(2,971 posts)Posters using parental locks to prevent their parents from watching certain channels, and then bragging about it with the attitude Tee-hee, aint I naughty.
GoodRaisin
(8,885 posts)I hear it over and over. Sorry it has happened to you too. Fox News and it's characters are prominently among the worst things that have ever happened to this country.
I hope they all reap their just reward.
iemanja
(53,001 posts)I hope it gives you some comfort knowing that you're not alone. But then again, maybe not.
Initech
(99,909 posts)mdbl
(4,972 posts)See if you can get them to watch it. Much luck to you.
tavernier
(12,322 posts)Not entirely certain why this was RMs intent. Money of course but who did he intend to take its place? Certainly not his Australian homeland. Russia? Too poor and weak with only an ego driven mouth keeping it in the running.
China?
Well it will be interesting to find out.
The sad part is that our so called patriots are his easiest dupes and are happily helping him and them to this massive heist.
Captain Zero
(6,712 posts)Fox has killed a lot of brain cells.
machoneman
(3,951 posts)One isn't born a hater, racist or anti-minority person. It's a learned response, 1st learned at a young age, to one's environment.
What really kills me is what Trump and R's in general haven't done for ardent MAGATS:
-no increase in pay
-no increase in benefits
-no better way of life
-no improved infrastructure
-no accounting for the rich evading taxes
-no accountability to bad corporate actions
I could go on and on but but always ask how MAGATS fare today versus the last Democratic president.
Did they gain ANYTHING except bile, hatred, fear, loathing, etc. as a result of Trump's one term in office?
Nope!
es466
(113 posts)Not to mention that if any of the MAGATs ran into him on the street, he wouldn't give them the time of day.
MarineCombatEngineer
(12,092 posts)had money to give him, otherwise.........
PatrickforB
(14,514 posts)MarineCombatEngineer
(12,092 posts)See post 83.
Dukkha
(7,341 posts)OAN only exists because their viewers think FOX is not extreme enough.
I miss the good old days of the 1990's before the elderly figured out how to use the Internet. Once conservative America infiltrated social media it was all over. That's a much worse echo chamber than cable news and far more bat shit crazy.
Cinnamonspice
(163 posts)There are news sources to the right of even them and they're making an impact.
I used to watch Fox more to get more of the whole picture until they started in on this Trump won nonsense. I watched Tucker Carlson do a story the other night and left out VERY BIG context.
I'm sorry for what you're going through with your family. Just keep being their family member. Family is more important than Trump. IT sounds like they think the insurrectionists were actually just flower pickers.
Ohioboy
(3,222 posts)She was once a critical thinking democrat. Now she votes republican and believe far fetched conspiracy theories. The only thing different in her life is FOX, and her television defaults to that propaganda every time she turns it on.
Brain washing is real, and it has happened to so many. It is shocking to see the difference in my mother. She used to question everything and think for herself. Now, she just accepts and believes everything FOX tells her.
BeckyDem
(8,361 posts)BradBo
(516 posts)He dies 2 years ago. My mom has since regained her sanity and hates Fox and all the hate coming from the right.
CrispyQ
(36,221 posts)Both my husband & I have experienced losing a family member to extreme right wing media. I saw it back in the early 90s when my JFK democratic mother worked where they listened to Rush Limbaugh all afternoon. In 18 months she was a different person. It's kind of unbelievable when you first realize the change in them. You think you can reason them out of it, but soon you discover they aren't reachable.
I'm so sorry about your family. I suspect families are even more divided than before after the last four years.
OMGWTF
(3,891 posts)berniesandersmittens
(11,323 posts)Many of your responses have given me some strange sort of peace, knowing that I'm not alone in this.
Looking back, I think when they got satellite TV is when the change began.
We had only an antennae to view local news and programs. I believe they got satellite installed about 6 years ago. My grandmother started out watching Shepard Smith and she despised Hannity, tucker, and Ingram.
I really don't understand how these blue collar, hard working Democrats changed in such an extreme way.
I love them regardless but it's so sad to hear the rhetoric.
Sending out lots of love to those of you who have experienced this tragedy in your own family.
Saoirse9
(3,662 posts)Happened to my family too. I don't think we will ever recover.
BComplex
(7,977 posts)Our democracy. The one that countless hundreds of thousands have died and suffered for. This is all on fox.
But it's also on our government for allowing lies to be sold on mass media as "truth".
Kaleva
(36,145 posts)Is it because Fox News puts out news that reinforces their viewers world view instead of challenging it like the others news outlets?
SharonAnn
(13,766 posts)BigmanPigman
(51,430 posts)I HATE FOX NEWS t-shirt. A person gave it to me at an anti-tRump protest when I complimented her shirt. It is my favorite!
Hortensis
(58,785 posts)could be if you can't limit the damage with you and wait for this insanity to pass and at least dwindle. It will, so hold onto the love and what you know is good in them.
Some will never give up these ideas but learn to keep their mouths shut with those who don't share them
Others will prefer to forget as much as possible, and loving family will help by not bringing it up. Some will actually forget/deny so well that they'll be shocked and angry if anyone accuses them of something so outrageous as what you're accusing your grandparents of now.
It's not like families haven't been here before.