Socialism, etc...

[Archae]

SOCIALISM You have 2 cows. You give one to your neighbor.

COMMUNISM You have 2 cows. The State takes both and gives you some milk.

FASCISM You have 2 cows. The State takes both and sells you some milk.

NAZISM You have 2 cows. The State takes both and shoots you.

BUREAUCRATISM You have 2 cows. The State takes both, shoots one, milks the other, and then throws the milk away.

CAPITALISM You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies.You sell them and invest the proceeds with Bernie Madoff.

SURREALISM You have two giraffes. The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.

AN AMERICAN CORPORATION You have two cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. Later, you hire a consultant to analyse why the cow has dropped dead.

VENTURE CAPITALISM You have two cows. You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows. The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island Company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company. The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more. You sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States, leaving you with nine cows. No balance sheet provided with the release. The public then buys your bull!

[banned from Kos]

1. Very creative! Are you the author?

Whoever - nice job.

[Archae]

2. Got it in my e-mail.

[Rex]

3. HAHAHA! EXCELLENT!

DADAISM - You mock all forms of government by replacing the cow with a broken bullhorn and the milk with liquid mercury then have the bullhorn drink the mercury while driving across a trightrope made of butterflies and moth farts. Beating of the profits ensue.

[orpupilofnature57]

4. Existentialism, You give your neighbor both cows

and tell him you want to barrow a cup of milk, continuosly for the rest of your life.

[bongbong]

5. Capitalism

Capitalism: You are a big business failure, but get a bailout from the taxpayer, use Government services while paying lower taxes, and then call yourself a "big success" when you fire all your employees and outsource the jobs.