I went in to my doctor for my ACA annual wellness checkup today, and had the PA...

[Enter stage left]

laughing like mad.

After asking me the usual question, like "do you smoke?", "do you drink?, etc, she asked me a question I had never heard before.

"Is there any family violence or a history of family violence?.

My response.

Hell no, my wife would kill me.

[Mr.Bill]

1. When I was getting prepped for my colonoscopy,

I had to answer a series of questions asked by the nurse, a man I knew because my wife was also a nurse and worked with him. One of the questions was something like "When you return home do you fear any violence or sexual assault?" I said "Unfortunately, no." The nurse laughed, my wife, who was sitting there, was less amused.

[NJCher]

2. At mine

I was asked about whether I was depressed, feeling blah.

I thought the way the question was phrased was leading. It was like they expected me to say I was depressed. I responded hell no, my life is great. Couldn’t be better. Every day is fun. I’m having a terrific time.

They looked at me like I was some kind of freak.

I continued on with stories about how much I enjoyed my work, how I love the place I live in, what a great relationship I have, and also about what wonderful friends I have. Eventually, one of them said OK you can quit telling us about how great your life is now.

I nearly burst out laughing right in their faces.

[pnwmom]

6. For people who are on a Medicare Advantage plan, that question IS leading.

They want people to say yes, because they get more points for people who are depressed.

[Beaverhausen]

3. How lucky you all are

To be oblivious that someone you love would respond very differently to that question.

Just…wow.

[Polly Hennessey]

5. Well, my life is doing fine right now. My biggest

problem is getting my dog Scout through Cranial Cruciate Ligament surgery recovery. First two weeks was the dreaded cone. It is an eight week recovery period. There can be no running, jumping, or stair climbing. We have three weeks and three days to go. We are meeting the challenge although it is daunting.

[Hekate]

4. As a blood donor I had to answer pages of questions from the nurse about my sex life & drug use..

Also had I traveled to this or that country.

It got so that part way thru this routine I’d start saying, “No — my life is extremely boring!” For some reason they were never amused at my attempts to lighten the mood.

[usonian]

7. That's because laughter is the best medicine

and it would put them out of business if the world found out.

[Tesha]

8. Oh! Yes I seem to get...

Have you ever had thoughts of hurting yourself?

…or of hurting others?


I started to laugh on the second part, and then realized that here in the emergency intake room, this is a very valid question. Valid because the hospital and then the local police had to intervene when another patient got a little extra salt.. Very salty.

[moonscape]

9. I started a certain chemo drug at

65 yo, on that could cause birth defects, and before every shipment from the specialty pharmacy a nurse would call and go over lots of particulars, i.e. side effects, dosing, etc and ask questions. The most amusing was : are you pregnant or could you be pregnant.

Hell no to both!