I Hate To Say It, But The Tea Party Ruined Santa Claus For Me

[Solomon]

I know it's stupid. And the guy is a fictional character. But whenever I see a depiction of Santa Claus now, I see an old racist white haired bastard. I know it ain't right but...

File it under stupid things that are irrational. Just one more of the many reasons that I hate the tea party.

[libodem]

1. Those bastages

Stole our Christmas!

[wandy]

2. Sometimes ya just can't resist. I give you the teabagger Santa................

[hlthe2b]

3. Wow.... Your mind seems to go in places I can't fathom...

Why would you associate kindly, pudgy, fictional Santa Claus with a racist ideal?

[LongTomH]

4. Bubba Claus? Santa's redneck cousin?

There was a parody making the rounds a few years ago. One of the lines had Rudolph's head mounted up on Bubba Claus' wall.

[ieoeja]

9. If Santa was a Hoosier...

(chorus
If Santa was a Hoosier
What would Christmas be today?
Would Santa have a beer gut
and a gun rack on his sleigh?
Instead of saying, "Ho! Ho! Ho!"
would he belch and scratch all day? (BURP!)
If Santa was a Hoosier
what would Christmas be today?

Now, I wonder what it'd be like
If Santa came from here?
Would the elves close down the workshop
and watch basketball all year?
Would Christmas Eve be canceled
and would Rudolph stay at home
'cause Santa's sleigh is entered
at a tractor pull at the dome?

If we saw the reindeer flyin'
Just what would be the reason?
Had Don's Guns had a sale
and declared it "reindeer season"?
Would Santa hang out on Pendleton Pike
with a hooker on her belly?
Would he come out of a bookstore
with a case of K-Y jelly?

(chorus)

When he's loaded up with all his toys
his dolls and baseball mitts
Would he fly over the Speedway
and yell, "Hey, show us your ****!"?
Would we find his sleigh impounded
and his elves out raising bail
'cause he flunked the breathalyzer
and he's in the county jail?

(chorus)

Now, would Santa be in traction
with his broken back a-healin'
from landing on a mobile home
and crashin' through the ceilin'?
If Santa was a Hoosier
would the star that lit the night
lead to celebrate the Savior
or the birth of Bobby Knight?

(repeat chorus twice)


A very popular song with my family in Indiana one Xmas. Then they all forgot it ever existed. I always found that truly odd.

[Brickbat]

5. What the what?

[ProudToBeBlueInRhody]

6. You're looking at it the wrong way

Santa is clearly one of those fat smelly hippies who believe in GIVING PEOPLE THINGS WHO DON'T DESERVE IT!!!! SOCIALIST!!!!

[Avalux]

7. I don't get it - why?

Santa Claus gives people things, doesn't steal from them....and his origins are non-Christian Europe. He was around long before the Tea Party and long after.

Don't let those idiots muddy up your mind like that!

[HappyMe]

8. What? So.......what?

Think about what Santa does. Brings joy to hearts of kids everywhere.