Newly discovered medieval art from the failed Giant Snail Invasion of 1064

[MrScorpio]

The rare depiction of an Anglo-Saxon soldier battling a giant French snail

Two famed British art historians, Simon Symington-Shufflebottom and Giles Twickworthy Hight-Beazley, have announced the discovery of an only surviving painting, depicting the little known 2nd of June 1064 Giant Snail Invasion of England. The failed invasion, near what is now known as the city of Liverpool by the Duke of Breton, Mollusceur the Third, was remarkable for it's poor location. Ironically, this area was also known for its close proximity to the ancient salt mines of Cheshire.

The defeat of Duke Mollosceur's giant snail legions by the Anglo-Saxon Prince, Gerald the Salty, second cousin twice removed to Edward the Confessor, happened at what the Bretons called the Battle of Escargot Le Grand. After Prince Gerald's forces spread piles of newly mined rock salt before the advance of Molloscuer's troops, the halted invasion force was set upon by a battalion of ravenous infantry, who were also in a fit of irony named, "The Snail Eaters."

The harrowing battle lasted one day and was described as quite appetizing, as local wines and giant pots of cooked vegetables were all carried in haste to the battlefield on the backs of fair maidens. Gerald's Snail Eaters were also remarkable for their part in the defeat of King Bovinus of Norway at the 1065 Battle of Cows near present-day Scarborough. From that point on, the battalion changed their name to the more familiar title of "The Beefeaters."

Overshadowed by the success of the second 11th Century Norman invasion by William the Conqueror, Mollosceur's debacle was thought to have been completely excised from all historical records. That was until the rare book sized painting was found buried in a medieval tomb near Ffynnongroyw, Wales, uncovered by construction workers who were building a new Hooters franchise restaurant.

Symington-Shufflebottom and Twickworthy Hight-Beazley announced that the painting is to be displayed in the Sainsbury Wing Exhibition of the National Gallery, beside other rare artworks and artifacts from such little remembered periods of British history, as the Unfortunate Harpsichord Migration of 1788 and Prince Edward's collection of passed gallstones.

[lumberjack_jeff]

1. That there's funny, I don't care who you are. n/t

[randome]

2. Something for everyone. It even has hooters in it.

[hr][font color="blue"][center]Rules are made to be broken. Including this one.[/center][/font][hr]

[Historic NY]

3. I always thought it was frogs.

[muriel_volestrangler]

4. Wow - I had to find out where you got the picture from

and it's a whole bizarre genre:

Recently a group of us went into our manuscripts store to have a look at some medieval genealogical rolls. We were examining Royal MS 14 B V, an English roll from the last part of the 13th century which contains quite a lot of marginalia, when one of our post-medieval colleagues noticed a painting of a knight engaging in combat with a snail.

This struck him as odd, which struck the medievalists in the group as odd; surely everyone has seen this sort of thing before, right? As anyone who is familiar with 13th and 14th century illuminated manuscripts can attest, images of armed knights fighting snails are common, especially in marginalia. But the ubiquity of these depictions doesn’t make them any less strange, and we had a long discussion about what such pictures might mean.

There has been much scholarly debate about the significance of these depictions of snail combat. As early as 1850, the magnificently-named bibliophile the Comte de Bastard theorised that a particular marginal image of a snail was intended to represent the Resurrection, since he discovered it in two manuscripts close to miniatures of the Raising of Lazarus. In her famous survey of the subject, Lilian Randall proposed that the snail was a symbol of the Lombards, a group vilified in the early middle ages for treasonous behaviour, the sin of usury, and ‘non-chivalrous comportment in general.’ This interpretation accounts for why the snail is so frequently seen antagonising a knight in armour, but does not explain why the knight is often depicted on the losing end of this battle, or why this particular image became so popular in the margins of non-historical texts such as Psalters or Books of Hours.

- See more at: http://britishlibrary.typepad.co.uk/digitisedmanuscripts/2013/09/knight-v-snail.html#sthash.LSXqXSAn.dpuf

[Iggo]

5. Oh, that was dry.

[Glorfindel]

6. Brilliant! Thank you very much for posting this

It sheds light on a little-known period of English history, emphasizing especially the plight of fair maidens in that backward time! Three cheers for Mr. Scorpio!

[PeoViejo]

7. Is that where Russel Upsom-Grub got his Knighthood?

Time to ponder, Methinks...

[ananda]

8. He and his mate Sir Loin of Pork.

[jmowreader]

17. And Sir Up of Maple

[packman]

9. Article is too long

I'll read it next slime. Unless one of you want to slug it out with me.

[randome]

10. Shell out a few bucks and buy it.

[hr][font color="blue"][center]TECT in the name of the Representative approves of this post.[/center][/font][hr]

[Vashta Nerada]

11. Those are actually real:

There has been much scholarly debate about the significance of these depictions of snail combat. As early as 1850, the magnificently-named bibliophile the Comte de Bastard theorised that a particular marginal image of a snail was intended to represent the Resurrection, since he discovered it in two manuscripts close to miniatures of the Raising of Lazarus. In her famous survey of the subject, Lilian Randall proposed that the snail was a symbol of the Lombards, a group vilified in the early middle ages for treasonous behaviour, the sin of usury, and ‘non-chivalrous comportment in general.’ This interpretation accounts for why the snail is so frequently seen antagonising a knight in armour, but does not explain why the knight is often depicted on the losing end of this battle, or why this particular image became so popular in the margins of non-historical texts such as Psalters or Books of Hours.

http://britishlibrary.typepad.co.uk/digitisedmanuscripts/2013/09/knight-v-snail.html

[freshwest]

12. Very nice to wake up to! Thanks, Mr. Scorpio. n/t

[MrScorpio]

14. You're very welcome. nt

[Demo_Chris]

13. rec!

[Tom_Foolery]

15. Look at that "S" car go! n/t

[scarletwoman]

16. Wait. What?

Ah oui! La guerre des escargots géants! Eh bien!