General Discussion
Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsNeighbor issue what would you do?
We have neighbors who moved in last year. They are a very quiet young couple, don't talk to anyone, no waving like all of us do. They refused to take part in last year's block party. I don't mind that they don't want to socialize, but they have two young sons who are a problem.
The boys are maybe age 8 and 10, they have caused some damage to garage doors in the neighborhood, they leave their toys, trucks balls bats all over the neighborhood, in yards, driveways etc. Lately they have begun to throw large objects and some sharp tools over our fence at our dogs. Yesterday, I returned one of the sharp barbecue tools to the father and asked that they be a bit more careful. He laughed, shut the door and walked away from me.
Should I call the police? The only other time I have reported a neighbor was when he was drunk in the backyard shooting a rifle into the sky . This seems tame, but these things they are throwing could injure one of my pups.
Glitterati
(3,182 posts)If they are renters, you would probably have some luck talking to the property owner. The homeowner's insurance company is going to be liable for damage done.
If they are owners, even though I would hate it, I would have no option but to get the authorities involved. If not the police, then the child authorities. Clearly the children are not being supervised well enough and throwing things like that at your animals is simply inappropriate.
redstatebluegirl
(12,264 posts)I had not thought of calling Rita and Dan but I may do that today. This morning a large barbecue fork was stuck in the ground on our side of the fence.
Glitterati
(3,182 posts)Damages done to neighboring properties (garage doors, etc.) are going to cost him a pretty penny in insurance claims and increased annual premiums.
You would be a good neighbor by alerting him to what is going on.
Fla Dem
(23,351 posts)If they know "Rita & Dan', suggest that they also call them. That way they'll know it's not just you.
SummerSnow
(12,608 posts)Warpy
(110,912 posts)the next time you find a sharp object stuck in the ground. Don't remove it, it needs to be seen for what it is. Don't return it, either, keep everything in a bag. Eventually those brats will run out of things to throw.
Also start pricing spite fencing, the high, solid wall of wood fencing. You can do one side of the yard at a time.
ETA: you have the fence. Show the cops the ladder. Tell them if the ladder disappears from the back yard, all will likely be copacetic. Oh, the little bastards will still throw things over the fence. They just won't be able to aim any of it. And don't return it until they move out. Present them with the bag of it.
lunasun
(21,646 posts)anything left on lawn could disappear
few times they have to pay for replaced items they may instill the need to bring back home all their crap
Sounds like hurting your dogs is their new entertainment
redstatebluegirl
(12,264 posts)They have put a small step ladder up against the fence.
snooper2
(30,151 posts)Then you can have a yard sale, maybe they'll buy something back
TBF
(31,922 posts)redstatebluegirl
(12,264 posts)I think they are annoyed that our fence is locked 24/7 and they don't have access like they do with other neighbors. They left our gate open one time and we put a lock on it after that. Other neighbors are following us on that choice.
I do like this idea, if some of their stuff turns up at our garage sale they might get the hint!
Call the police. You tried to be decent about it and talk to them (which I think you are obligated to do) - but they have responded by being asses so I would call and report them.
lunasun
(21,646 posts)property damage and the renters reaction to your request and that it did not stop after request
can you motion alarm that area where the ladder is ?
if it doesnt spook the kids at least when you are home and dogs are out you would know they are at the ladder/fence when the alarm goes off
video always helps
would not let this go on too long
end it now
Scootaloo
(25,699 posts)MineralMan
(146,192 posts)Lay out the issues and propose solutions to them. Explain your concerns about the behaviors and ask them to work to reduce the issues.
Avoid any sort of language that could seem to be threatening, and ask for their cooperation in minimizing the activities that are causing you concern. Tell them that you know they'll be interested in reducing liabilities caused by their children's activities that impact you.
Mail the letter to them, noting that a copy of the letter has been sent to the property owners. Send a copy to the property owners, with a cover letter, explaining that you're trying to get their tenants to work on correcting issues that concern you. Keep a copy of both letters for future reference.
Whatever you do, don't get into a verbal argument with them. That never works out well. Just let them know about your concerns and that you'd like to see changes that would reduce those concerns. The copy to the property owner should do the trick.
Note that this won't make them friendly toward you, but it may work to reduce the annoyance and risk.
I've done this successfully more than once with troublesome neighbors. The behavior stopped, and it was probably the copy sent to the landlord that did the job. In one case, the issue was an overgrown back yard full of weeds and trash. The keywords that got the property owner's attention was "vermin" and "health department."
Just make it an upbeat letter, not a rant. If the letter doesn't work, contact the property owners again, this time without copying the neighbor. If the behavior escalates, consider notifying the authorities if the property owners don't deal with it.
SummerSnow
(12,608 posts)MineralMan
(146,192 posts)It's best to start simply. Certified letters are something to do as you escalate if things don't change. Such disputes often need to be handled in stages.
Yo_Mama
(8,303 posts)I would only add that I would take pictures of the sharp objects ending up on the wrong side of the fence. Throwing a barbecue fork alone over the fence could potentially cause serious injury. I would include specifics and the concern about bodily harm.
I think that will solve the problem.
aikoaiko
(34,127 posts)eta: yo mama beat me by a minute
RKP5637
(67,032 posts)geek tragedy
(68,868 posts)write to the landlord, ccing their insurance company if you know who that is.
Response to redstatebluegirl (Original post)
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redstatebluegirl
(12,264 posts)she said her husband has a collection in his garage. She said he punctured a tire on something they left in his driveway last week and he was furious. Talked to Dad, not dice he could care less.
I'm going to call the landlord in a few minutes.
lunasun
(21,646 posts)good luck and be alert that there is no backlash
because many folks with ill behaved kids really do not like being called on it
Often you can sort of see where the kids got their idea of manners...............
redstatebluegirl
(12,264 posts)Funny thing is, their Mom is a grade school teacher.
Yo_Mama
(8,303 posts)of what you are sending to this neighbor.
There is already property damage and the possibility of bodily harm, and your other suffering neighbor should also contact the landlord. The landlord will take action, but the written letters also help the landlord legally, because in some areas the landlord may be impeded by renter protection laws and a couple like this might not be normally responsive to the landlord.
From what you've posted here this is a serious safety issue, not a "nuisance". I don't know what this couple can be thinking, but they need to wise up before something bad happens. The kids are too young to understand the dangers of what they are doing - they're probably just bored. Bored and genuinely dangerous.
KittyWampus
(55,894 posts)Orrex
(63,085 posts)It's the only way to be sure.
Response to Orrex (Reply #20)
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Orrex
(63,085 posts)Fie!
demwing
(16,916 posts)PearliePoo2
(7,768 posts)These are little sociopaths in the making.
I never trust anyone that enjoys hurting animals. I would go berserk if my dogs were hurt or killed by anyone.
I'd be afraid to even go to work only to come home and find my dogs had been impaled by a sharp object thrown at them.
Do something today..right now...before the little bastards injure, maim or kill your dogs.
a kennedy
(29,465 posts)sociopaths indeed, this is how they become sociopaths, animal abuse. Ugh...... Good luck and watch yourself and your pets.
mercuryblues
(14,491 posts)Anything left in your yard keep. Put it all in a box and when they move out give it back to them.
Stargazer09
(2,131 posts)Take pictures, keep a written record of transgressions, call the landlord.
I hope things improve soon!
KittyWampus
(55,894 posts)Dash87
(3,220 posts)to stop or won't have enough left to throw. If you don't want to take them, make the neighbor come to your your house to get them.
Your problem is that you're making it easy for them by giving the tools right back. If it's annoying for them to get the tools back, the behavior will stop.
redstatebluegirl
(12,264 posts)bluestate10
(10,942 posts)what buttons you will push on them if you are perceived by them as being an aggressor.
Iggo
(47,487 posts)That includes written and photographic.
One of their bbq forks sticking out of your lawn? Take a pic and make a note.
Drew Richards
(1,558 posts)Front and back yards.
Remember cops HATE paperwork...they will do next to anything not to file for you at first...insist...tell them these kids are escalating and they are going to permanently harm or kill your pets...you want it documented that you filed a complaint...
3. do NOT return anything thrown over the fence!
A. Document when it appeared and what it was and if you surmise if it was thrown at your animals.
B. take a camera snap shot of the item...
C. Review surveillance cameras for incriminating evidence for each instance...copy related video TWICE! on flash drives.
One copy for Police and one for you for...backup when the police say "they can't find it...drop your case...bullshit.."
If the police cant help and it escalates after the report and visit from police...
Go to the media...tell them you have nice video of these little monsters trying to kill your dogs...that should get them salivating enough to put it on the news with video....
at least that what I would do.
Incitatus
(5,317 posts)former9thward
(31,804 posts)If it turns into a legal issue you need to have the facts on your side. I hope neighbors are not returning the "toys left all over the neighborhood." Throw them away.
hamsterjill
(15,214 posts)With an offer to email to them pictures of the objects and what it is that is happening. You should specifically state and instruct that these people are NOT to enter upon your property without your permission.
If things don't change drastically in ten days, I'd send a certified letter to the landlords explaining that the actions of their tenants are making the quiet enjoyment of your property impossible. Again, I'd state that the occupants are not to enter upon your property without your permission. Check and see if you have restrictive covenants filed against the properties. Many times, even if there is not an established homeowners association, there are some restrictive covenants in place. You can generally check by looking at the deed when you took title to your property and see what's listed.
I would be worried about my dogs with kids like this next door and I would do anything and everything reasonable to keep them safe during the time I was not at home. Not only could these little buttholes cause injury to the dogs by throwing something into your yard, they can also say they climbed over the fence to retrieve something and feign having been bitten. (That's why you want prior evidence of instructing them NOT to come upon your property.) Now...would that get them anywhere? It shouldn't as they would be trespassing on your property, but you'd be surprised what I've seen where I live as to how ANY dog situations are handled. I've seen this very thing happen and the dog owners intimidated to the point where they release their dogs for euthanasia just to make the havoc go away. Don't fall into this!
Does anyone else just get sick of people with kids NOT being responsible enough to make them mind????!!!! I mean, we've got kids in my own neighborhood who routinely go into someone else's back yard as if it were their own. Like you, I keep my yard locked. But these brats know no boundaries!!! They play in the street and cars coming to homes have to wait for the little brats to decide to move out of their way. There's a park within 2 minutes where the kids could play without hurting anything, but the parent's don't want to take the time to supervise a visit to the park. It's time that PARENT'S start raising their children; not society as a whole.
redstatebluegirl
(12,264 posts)The people who own the home used to live there. They retired and kept the house after they decided to see the country in their RV. I had their cell number and called them. Evidently I was not the first one, other had called including the people on the other side of them. The kids had been up on the roof throwing rocks at their dogs!
Long story short the owners son will be over this evening to talk with them and if it doesn't go well, they will be given 30 days to find somewhere else to live.
My dogs are not out all day, they have a dog door that we let them use when we are home, when we are not, they are not outside and do not have access. I will be watching them really closely. I told the owners I would be calling the police if I see anything in my yard, or see the ladder up on the fence again.
The other neighbor who called have sent the owner a bill for his damaged garage door to the tune of $300! Hopefully this will come to some conclusion. They are not going to tell them who called but will tell them that they are concerned about liability should anything else happen. They are also going to indicate that the neighbors do not want to involve the police unless they have to.
I'll let you know how it goes after they talk to them tonight....
Stargazer09
(2,131 posts)If they aren't careful, they might find a black mark on their rental history. Most property managers, in my experience, look for references from previous landlords.
"Yeah, we had to kick them out, because they were damaging the neighbors' property and abusing animals." It's going to be difficult to find a new place to live with a reference like that!
Drew Richards
(1,558 posts)Just wait...if the adults act like they don't give a *^6 and maybe just beat their kids over the issue...that will not stop the kids from doing what they want...because they are probably used to it...
It becomes a vicious cycle...warn threaten ignore beat...warn threaten ignore beat...the other outcome is the male adult will start doing really horrible things such as poisoning your pets...
Get the cameras in place!!! heck you can buy cheap ones on the internet or go by cheap-os from walmart but get cameras and a recorder...or you may regret it the rest of your life.
redstatebluegirl
(12,264 posts)I just think they lack any supervision. I bought cameras today and husband is installing them. What a mess!
ecstatic
(32,567 posts)Battery operated, quick and easy set up. Can be viewed online and by phone.
http://www.vuezone.com
lunasun
(21,646 posts)avebury
(10,946 posts)and leaving them outside any time that someone was not home.
Another concern would be what would happen if the little heathens get injured while on your property harassing your dogs. Logic will not play a role in how their parents would react.
It makes one wonder what the little heathens are doing to the rental property.
I would suggest that it is time to organize your fellow neighbors in order to take back the neighborhood. That may involve coming up with a unified plan for dealing with this family, including talking to the landlord/property owner and the police. Document, document, document. Anything left on your property would become yours to dispose of as you see fit. Forget having a garage sale, the town dump will serve just as well and take less work on your part. Also it will eliminate any nasty conversations you might have with their idiot parents.
You might want to consider posting No Trespassing signs prominently and call the police if the little brats step on your property. Is there anyway that you can set up a security camera (motion detection) that would catch them harassing dogs? Social media tends to work wonders these days. A nice you tube clip of the little brats harassing your dogs posted on line might go a long ways in shaming this family.
avebury
(10,946 posts)Okie. What town/city is this taking place in?
redstatebluegirl
(12,264 posts)Generic Brad
(14,270 posts)I hear he likes to egg houses and he is so lawyered up he can get away with anything.
Cleita
(75,480 posts)have a chat with problem neighbors. If you have such a unit, they do a good job. They don't strong arm but explain to the neighbors that there have been complaints and they do try to work with them to try to find out if other things are going on like drugs or domestic abuse. They try to recommend services and also inform them of how they might be in violation of the law and how it will affect them. Mostly we have had problems with drugs and neighbors not taking care of their animals. They have solved most of the problems.
bluestate10
(10,942 posts)clearly isn't going to restrain his children.
RKP5637
(67,032 posts)where this might lead. At least this way if an incident does occur, the police will have a record of problems with that neighbor. I would also get with some of your other neighbors to discuss the situation and how you all might handle it.
defacto7
(13,485 posts)that's been suggested... why not invite them over for a barbecue? Try to make friends with them? See if you can see any interests they have that you can start a conversation over. Take some food over as an offering of civility. I don't know what your home situation is but I wouldn't suggest you do anything by yourself but maybe they just need to find out there is a better way to function.
Then again, maybe they are psychopaths and you should stay away.
Personally, I've never been the type to "call Judge Judy" whenever there are people who aren't great at the social arts or have problem kids. I'd rather take a chance on being wrong than start by calling the lawyers. But be careful no matter what direction you take. Just calling the police or getting the landlord involved can be an escalation in itself.
B Calm
(28,762 posts)thing you want or need is a war.
avebury
(10,946 posts)responsible for their actions.
The comment on the damaged garaged door reminds my of an incident that occurred years ago at my parents home. My mom and I were out running errands and my sister was at the house with her two little kids. My niece and nephew caught 2 of the neighborhood kids writing on the side of my parent's garage with charcoal. They went inside the house and told my sister that AJ and John were doing something very bad outside. [ One of the kids was the sun of our family doctor. The other one was a little heathen who grew up getting in trouble with the law. ] My sister called the Doctor's wife and told her what had happened. Mrs. Hardy brought both boys back to my parent's house. When my mother and I got home we found my sister and Mrs. Hardy standing over both boys while they cleaned the grafitti off of the side of the garage. My mother and I had to fight to keep from laughing because the kids picked the wrong house to mess with. My sister is kind of a take no prisoner type of person. Believe me there was probably no greater punishment for those boys then having to deal with my sister. I don't think that the Doctor's son ever did anything like that again.