The hypersexualization of American tween culture: Has it gone too far?

[Jesus Malverde]

A provocative, borderline alarmist Newsweek story on the hyper-sexualization of American youth culture paints a disturbing picture of Ugg boot–wearing, Taylor Swift–listening girls who are social media obsessed but too young to sign up for Facebook—in other words, tweens.

Tweens range in age from 10 to 12. The term originally referred to those female preadolescents who were too young for toys and too old for boys. But the girls described in this story are all about boys.

The lengthy story titled “Sex and the Single Tween” opens with a shocking conversation between a group of girls, ages 11 and 12, who talk about boobs, boyfriends and oral sex. It’s the sort of conversation that you might remember being a part of as a college student living in a dorm. But 11-year-olds talking about blow jobs? That’s what tween culture has come to according to the story’s author Abigail Jones. Has Jones accurately captured the essence of American girl culture? Let’s hope she’s off the mark.

Jones presents a rather convincing case that the current generation of tweens is far more advanced than girls from past eras. These Juicy Couture girls sport shorter skirts and are more boy-obsessed. They know more about sex and wear more makeup.

http://blog.sfgate.com/sfmoms/2014/01/28/the-hypersexualization-of-american-tween-culture-has-it-gone-too-far/

[el_bryanto]

1. Teen-agerism is a social construct - but maybe a necessary given our more complicated world

Compared to, say, the middle ages.

As for it being overly sexualized - that's complicated isn't it? What would we do about it from a political angle (other than Sex Education).

Bryant

[1StrongBlackMan]

10. Parental Education of our child ...

regarding sex; but more regarding, self-respect/self-esteem. And, absent that education being provided by a "parent", than by a concerned community member.

I can't tell you how many times, Mrs. 1SBM gave me the "step out the room ... it's 'guided' girl-talk time", on the many occasions that BabyGirl1SBM had company. It happened almost weekly from BabyGirl1SBM's age: 8-15. And I think it's a testament to Mrs. 1SBM's impact that she continues to have this "talks" with these "Girls", even though most of them are off at college.

[HappyMe]

13. That's it exactly.

Mrs. 1SBM is to be praised for this. They can teach sex ed all they want at school, but self-respect and decent values are learned at home.

[1StrongBlackMan]

18. And, if not in the child's home ...

in the home of a concerned adult.

On a slightly different note ...

I grew up in an age (and neighborhood) where us kids knew that we had to leave the street (if not, the neighborhood) in order to get into trouble, because our parent(s) knew just about every adult on the street and it was not uncommon to get caught doing something, and getting our behinds dusted, by "Mrs. Jones" ... and then getting it again by our parent(s).

But those were different times.

[HappyMe]

20. That's pretty much how I grew up.

It was like the Mom mafia or something. You couldn't get away with a damn thing. I wouldn't trade that for anything.

[JaneyVee]

2. The solution obviously is to block access to birth control and cut education.

[jberryhill]

3. They should vaginally knit more modest clothing

http://www.democraticunderground.com/?com=view_post&forum=1002&pid=4192192

[Jesus Malverde]

5. I may never be able to top that one.

286 replies, 8500 views and only one rec from an account called "vaginal_knitter".

Good times...

[jberryhill]

38. Shoulda been "vaginal-nitwit"

[pnwmom]

4. It's all about marketing and making money -- even if it's at the expense of the well being

of children.

[Dash87]

6. "Too young for toys, but too old for boys" wait, wut?

[KamaAina]

8. I think that's backwards

[ProfessorGAC]

11. Thought The Same

Good descriptor, though. Just got the terms confused.

[aikoaiko]

32. bloggers cant be trusted to write.

[laundry_queen]

7. Sounds pretty much like what I discussed as a tween

26 years ago. We all wore make up and miniskirts too. We were boy crazy at age 10 and played spin the bottle at every party. We all had our periods by age 12.5 and we watched Madonna pretend masturbate on stage, or we watched the big hair rockers simulate oral sex.

I'm not saying it's right...I'm saying this isn't new.

[frazzled]

14. I'm older than you ...

So I was a tween 50 or so years ago. Since the Beatles Ed Sullivan show is being discussed a lot this year, I could only think of that as a landmark of my tween years (I was 14 in 1964).

We wore makeup and miniskirts were just coming in (but we still wore blouses with peter pan collars; no glitz, no sexy little tops), we were boy crazy, and spin the bottle was played at parties. So yes, it isn't new. But I had no idea about oral sex and didn't know any "bad" words. We were actually pretty innocent ... though maybe today's tween girls see themselves as innocent, too.

I have a daughter (now in her early thirties), and I remember the glaring transformation that happened around 12 and 13. I had a difficult time dealing with it, and accepting it. She went from reading Little House on the Prairie one day to ... god, I don't remember what, but it was like Jekyll and Hyde. It felt like losing someone, and I felt it wasn't really her: just a desperate attempt to fit in.

Adolescence is always hard, and each generation thinks the next is doing it wrong. I do think it's getting younger and younger, though. Which is odd, because it's also, apparently, lasting longer.

[laundry_queen]

25. Oh, I think there's a difference from 50 years ago or so

My own mother talks about not even knowing many of these things until she was in high school - she was a preteen in the late 60's. However, she attributes it to living in a remote farming community. Also, back then, people married young. They went from preteens to married in just 5 years or so. They had to grow up pretty fast. So I agree it lasts longer now.

As for me, yes, at age 10 and 11 we were talking about oral sex. I was swearing/cussing from about age 9 or so. So, considering that was 26+ years ago, I don't see this article as some revelation.

I don't agree that it's starting earlier.

My own daughters (I have 4 total, only one is younger than 'preteen') are definitely later to mature than I was. I find myself explaining things to my 16 year old. She's shocked when I tell her stories about when I was 12 and 13. My 16 and 13 year old are nothing like what I was. And I'm not some innocent parent either...we are extremely open and honest (my 16 year old has come out to me about being gay) it's just they aren't as 'advanced' as I was at that age. Same town and schools and everything. At 16 I was already pretty much an adult...I had a license, drove myself to work, paid my insurance, kept my grades up (straight As), played music, played sports and got floor-licking drunk on the weekends. My 16 year old isn't anywhere near that...doesn't have a licence...most of her friends don't either. Hardly anyone drinks (by 16 I was an old pro - I started at age 12) and they are just starting to 'date'. They all JUST got jobs (I had been working for years at that point). Anyway, my daughter's generation, to me, seems to be much, much later in everything than me and my friends were. Of course, this is a subjective observation. And so far, I haven't had to deal with any Jekyll and Hyde stuff at all. I've actually enjoyed my teens so far, LOL. Maybe my kids are some anomaly.

[Warpy]

29. Yes, it started at 11 when I was a kid

in the 50s and 60s. The girls who started to develop first also started wearing hose and makeup to school. The conversation was boyfriend, clothing and makeup centered.

I was a nerd and a late bloomer. While it was uncomfortable at the time, I'm glad I was a late bloomer.

[MadrasT]

35. Huh. When I was that age (mid to late 70s), where I lived,

it was not like that at all.

Me and my peers, ages 10-13, were still children and acted like it.

I grew up in Lancaster County PA, which at the time was pretty damn conservative (and to some degree, still is).

There were a few girls who started this kind of behavior around age 12 or 13, but it was by no means the norm.

[HappyMe]

9. I think parents have to start

saying NO to the kids as far as clothes go. They should know who their kids friends are and know their parents.

I remember many a time taking my purchases back to the store because they said NO you aren't wearing that and NO you aren't going there with those kids....

[1StrongBlackMan]

15. BabyGirl 1SBM ...

to this day, reminds me of the timeS (as in, more than a few) that her "cute" (but way too short skirt) or her "grown-up" undies ended up in the trash.

I said, "No way", and the stuff either went back to the store, or into the trash.

[HappyMe]

16. Good for you!

It sounds like you and Mrs 1SBM are good parents. Too many people let the kids run the show rather than the other way around.

[1StrongBlackMan]

21. BabyGirl 1SBM knew ...

without a doubt ... that my job was to be "Daddy", not "friend."

When she was home for Xmas, we talked about that and how much she, now, appreciates that I held down my job.

[laundry_queen]

26. The problem is

once your kid hits the clothes size bigger than 6X, most kids clothing is trashy. I was able to go higher end with my older kids and get more age appropriate clothing but people who can't afford brand names are stuck with the trashy crap.

[HappyMe]

27. I suppose that might be a problem.

I don't have any more teens and didn't have any girls, so I don't tend to look at tween and teen clothes.

This sounds like a good business opportunity for somebody.

[LittleBlue]

12. Did you see Beyonce? Kids are watching her

She apparently was writhing around in a chair in a thong. Then Jay Z started grabbing her butt on stage. She has a baby daughter. Nice example, Beyonce. The male singers seemed to think that music is grabbing their crotches and thrusting. I turned it off.

If you want a culprit, look no further. Kids watch and idolize music stars.

[HappyMe]

17. Beyonce and Jay Z aren't raising your kids. You are.

It's up to parents to teach self respect, values and common sense. Beyonce and Jay Z are entertainers, that's it.

[TroglodyteScholar]

33. Thank you...

You saved me some time.

[geek tragedy]

19. Adult woman acts as if she has sex with her husband, inevitable slut-shaming ensues nt

[snooper2]

22. You blame Hip Hop

I blame Maury LOL


Maury show: 13 year old says sex gives her more energy

[JVS]

24. Any Tween who would emulate behavior seen on Maury is beyond hope.

[Warpy]

30. No, they'll grow up, too

Only they'll have a couple of babies to take care of and shitty job prospects.

[MicaelS]

23. Middle School Confessions (2002)

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0307157/

Girls talk fairly explicitly about sex, including blow-jobs.

So it's nothing new.

[Xyzse]

28. Oh god... I don't want to know...

Can't they have longer childhoods?

[renate]

31. the difference between then and now is that nothing is shocking

It's all right there in broad daylight on TV and on the radio, and obviously on the Internet. Sure, I could unplug the TV but their peers are all talking about this stuff anyway. My kids haven't given me a moment's real worry about what kind of nonsense they'll get up to when I'm not looking, partly because I expect them to be teenagers and not perfect angels. They have good sense and good values and I don't expect teenagers to sit at home knitting, so I realize they'll probably make a few mistakes but I trust their judgment in not making really critical ones.

Having said that, though, I really am shocked and grossed out by what passes for normal music and normal conversation in the media that any non-Amish kid is exposed to. Songs are all about sex, and not even with double entendres. It's a shame for them, really, because "Voulez vous coucher avec moi" is a whole lot sexier than "Tonight I'm f*cking you". And on reality TV, which girls love and watch together as a social thing from middle school on up, people talk about going down on casual acquaintances as if it were absolutely nothing. It's not as though my kids' friends would shield them from all of it if I unplugged the TV, but honestly, I wonder what's next. There isn't that much further to go.

[steve2470]

34. totally OT but that cat gif is so funny !

Love it !

[Brickbat]

36. I know 11-year-olds who play with dolls, climb trees, know what blow jobs are, have their periods,

haven't started their periods, play football, do cheerleading, disdain boys, have boys as best friends, play soccer, play hockey, play softball, play baseball, do crafts, masturbate, ride horses, fear growing up, have contempt for adults, etc...

"Tween culture"? Absurd. It's just another media meme people pursue so they have something to write about.

[bluestate10]

40. As I recall, I learned to masturbate successfully when I was eleven. Until then I

wondered what all the fuss was about. I turned out perfectly ok.

[Demo_Chris]

37. Nothing new under the sun. nt

[bluestate10]

39. That is where parenting comes in. Wages are so low that parents have to work long

hours or two jobs to make ends meet. Republicans talk about family values, but they do everything to destroy families. The majority of republicans in Congress are country people that come to Washington thinking that they have kernels of wisdom no one else possess. Societies that invest in after school programs, pay high wages, impose reasonable tariffs to protect their industries and businesses from unfair competition, invest in early childhood education and post preschool education, don't restrict birth control or right to abortion, have fewer abortions that the USA per capital, have happier populations, have lower medical costs, and have tweens and other teens that go on to be productive adults.

Having wrote what I wrote, I think today's tweens are a pretty smart bunch based upon limited exposure to them. I think you worry too much. Our responsibility as adults is to set the table for them and not leave them with unbearable burdens.

[Comrade Grumpy]

41. Kids these days. Just stay offa my lawn.