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Couple New To Florida Aren't Happy With Gay Neighbors
By Abigail Van Buren 9 hours ago Dear Abby
DEAR ABBY: My husband and I relocated to Florida a little over a year ago and were quickly welcomed into our new neighbors' social whirl. Two couples in the neighborhood are gay -- one male, one female. While they are nice enough, my husband and I did not include them when it was our turn to host because we do not approve of their lifestyle choices. Since then, we have been excluded from neighborhood gatherings, and someone even suggested that we are bigots!
Abby, we moved here from a conservative community where people were pretty much the same. If people were "different," they apparently kept it to themselves. While I understand the phrase "when in Rome," I don't feel we should have to compromise our values just to win the approval of our neighbors. But really, who is the true bigot here? Would you like to weigh in? -- UNHAPPY IN TAMPA
DEAR UNHAPPY: I sure would. The first thing I'd like to say is that regardless of what you were told in your previous community, a person's sexual orientation isn't a "lifestyle choice." Gay people don't choose to be gay; they are born that way. They can't change being gay any more than you can change being heterosexual.
I find it interesting that you are unwilling to reciprocate the hospitality of people who welcomed you and opened their homes to you, and yet you complain because you are receiving similar treatment.
From where I sit, you may have chosen the wrong place to live because it appears you would be happier in a less integrated neighborhood surrounded by people who think the way you do. But if you interact only with people like yourselves, you will have missed a chance for growth, which is what you have been offered here. Please don't blow it.
http://news.yahoo.com/couple-florida-aren-39-t-happy-gay-neighbors-050113020.html
yeoman6987
(14,449 posts)They don't. They can believe whatever they want and invite whoever they want, but the neighbors can too. It is weird that they are upset by the neighbors not inviting them to activities especially if the "gays" are invited (shutter...lol). Aren't the neighbors being considerate to you by not having you hang out with the gays. I am gay and find the letter pretty cool actually.
Springslips
(533 posts)They complain about compromising their values, but expect the neighborhood to compromise theirs. They think it wrong not to be invited to gathering, but won't invite gay couple to their. The issue they are hiding isn't isn't pressure to compromise their values, it's that they want their values imposed on everyone else-- and they are unhappy that's not being done.
JNelson6563
(28,151 posts)The new-to-the-neighborhood couple need to engage with the entire social circle of not. Apparently this is a pretty healthy group sans cliques and the like. Unhappy in Tampa is only unhappy because those she/he deems to be acceptable won't play along by socializing with part of the group, leaving the "different" people on the outside looking in.
This letter writer & spouse are a perfect example of part of the problem. Focusing on differences and doing what they can to achieve segregation of sorts.
I bet they watch Faux News.
Julie
bullwinkle428
(20,626 posts)Well-known uber right-wing enclave of retirees in Florida, for those that weren't aware.
cali
(114,904 posts)most people in this country.
HERVEPA
(6,107 posts)Original Abby is no longer alive, as I'm sure you know.
CBGLuthier
(12,723 posts)This was a very good response from her. Some times though she is not as good as her mother was in having empathy for people who are different.
marble falls
(56,353 posts)unblock
(51,973 posts)LynneSin
(95,337 posts)Just saying!
Lost_Count
(555 posts)shenmue
(38,501 posts)Life is much better that way.
Skittles
(152,963 posts)when it comes down to it, they define and judge gay folk solely by their (perceived) sex lives......WTF
JBoy
(8,021 posts)cinnabonbon
(860 posts)Got to love her.
libdem4life
(13,877 posts)know (or understand) his world, but I do know that he's in mine." It was great. Maybe someone has the clip somewhere.