9/11 Truther Vows Not To Rest Until Everyone Knows He An Asshole

[iandhr]

MANCHESTER, NH—Claiming that the evidence is in plain sight for those who want to see it, local man and passionate 9/11 Truth movement supporter Victor Sidwell, 32, told reporters Wednesday that he will not rest until everyone knows that he is a complete asshole.

The zealous Truther, who for more than 10 years has reportedly labored to shed light on the fact that he is an obnoxious blowhard seemingly incapable of keeping his fucking mouth shut, vowed to continue lecturing acquaintances, confronting strangers, and handing out pamphlets on the street in an effort to convince as many people as possible that he’s an absolute and utter prick.

“Ever since the so-called terrorist attacks of September 11, 2001, I’ve only had one goal in mind: making people realize that I’m a piece of shit,” said Sidwell while posting a lengthy list of inconsistencies in the 9/11 Commission Report on a friend’s Facebook timeline. “If you take even a cursory look at the available information, it becomes glaringly obvious that I’m an abrasive jackass who routinely drowns out anyone unfortunate enough to get locked into a discussion with me.”

“The proof is right there,” he continued. “I’m a repugnant, grating fuck, and I won’t stop until every single person knows it.”

Sidwell has reportedly gone to great lengths to publicize his position as an insufferable loudmouth by diverting every one of his conversations toward the melting point of structural steel, repeatedly calling in to talk radio shows to express his controversial beliefs as to what “really happened” on Flight 93, and placing “What Did Cheney Know?” stickers in bathrooms of numerous local businesses.

Speaking with reporters, the staunch proponent of the “controlled demolition” 9/11 conspiracy theory conceded that it is not always easy making those around him recognize that he is an unapologetic bastard who needs to shut the fuck up and get a life. Sidwell affirmed that, in spite of the challenges, he remains determined to “give a wake-up call” regarding his supreme dickishness to everyone he meets by forcibly engaging them in debates in office break rooms, personal residences, bars, internet message boards, and grocery store checkout lines.

According to the Truther, most of the public remains “trapped inside a bubble” in which they ignorantly perceive him as a rational, well-adjusted member of society. However, he claimed he is making notable progress in convincing more and more of them of the “cold, hard reality” every time he loudly interrupts a friend’s conversation in order to voice his suspicions concerning the whereabouts of the hijacked airliners’ missing black boxes.

“Even though it’s clear that I’m an irritating dipshit, it sometimes takes people a while before they’re willing to take off the blinders and come to their senses,” said Sidwell, who on a regular basis forwards lengthy chain emails containing unsourced accounts of missiles striking the Pentagon to everyone in his address book. “But when you look at the objective facts, a clear picture begins to emerge: I have a compulsive need to engage in arguments in order to assert my intellectual superiority. I am in love with the sound of my own voice. I am not a good person.”

“The more I reach out to others, the more apparent all of that becomes,” Sidwell added.

Having spent years disrupting city council meetings and leaving inflammatory comments on every single YouTube video he watches regardless of its content, sources predicted that it would not be long before Sidwell succeeded in his longtime goal of proving to the world that he is indeed a first-class shitheel.

In fact, numerous sources close to Sidwell acknowledged that he has already succeeded in alerting them to the accuracy of his endless, obsessive claims that he is a jerkoff, with many of these individuals telling reporters that they now wonder how they could have ever doubted him.

http://www.theonion.com/articles/911-truther-vows-not-to-rest-until-everyone-knows,35319/?utm_source=Facebook&utm_medium=SocialMarketing&utm_campaign=LinkPreview:1 efault

Thought The Onion was supposed to be satire

[nadinbrzezinski]

1. Ah yes, good satire

Problem is we have met these guys, mostly guys. My all time fav, since he almost managed to get thrown out of city council meetings, was our favorite. local truther\antisemite.

[jakeXT]

2. The black boxes just disappeared

http://m.

[SecularMotion]

3. The Big Bamboozle

[Nuclear Unicorn]

5. Wait. You're a Truther?

[SecularMotion]

6. Wait. You're a True Believer?

Do you accept the official story of the events of 9/11 as provided by the Bush administration without question?

[Politicalboi]

7. Soon to be ignored

Not by me, but others who believe Bush's account. Those that think the towers were made of wood and paper. Or that our biggest defense building sits idle for 40 minutes after second attack of towers and let's itself get attacked. Yes it's ALL believable. Once the "T" word is used, you're toast around here.

[cpwm17]

12. The science of the collapsing buildings is not difficult

Apparently not everybody on DU are fans of simple science.

The scientific community is not in on some massive conspiracy with Bush. Most scientists didn't even support him.

[Nuclear Unicorn]

8. So you think the government would ruthlessly slaughter thousands of its own citizens in the name of

raw power and naked aggression.

But you're also anti-2nd Amendment.

wow

[SecularMotion]

9. You didn't answer the question.

Do you accept the official story of the events of 9/11 as provided by the Bush administration without question?

[cpwm17]

13. Bush didn't provide the "official story" on how 9-11 went down

Americans of many walks of life, in and out of government, provided the answers on how 9-11 went down.

[Chan790]

16. Thank You.

-from a Pentagon attack witness.

[SecularMotion]

23. Yes, the official story of the events of 9/11 was provided by

government officials of the Bush administration.

[B Calm]

40. Then where are the black boxes?

[SecularMotion]

43. According to the official story, they were destroyed in the crashes.

[B Calm]

46. LOL

[zappaman]

17. So the only evidence in regards to 9/11 came from the Bush administration?

[SecularMotion]

22. We're discussing the official story provided by the government under the Bush administration.

The same administration that rushed to clean up and destroy much of the physical evidence at the scene of the crimes.

Do you accept the official story of the events of 9/11 as provided by the Bush administration without question?

[Nuclear Unicorn]

26. That's not the point of my comments.

I'm curious why you so stridently oppose people being able to defend themselves from a government you claim has committed what would be the most heinous crimes in human history.

[SecularMotion]

27. Answer the question. Are you a true believer?

Do you accept the official story of the events of 9/11 as provided by the Bush administration without question?

[Nuclear Unicorn]

34. I'm granting your premise but I don't understand why my belief or disbelief

would prevent you from answering. Why do you want the American people disarmed in the face of such a criminal government? Does someone else accepting the official story somehow make your being disarmed and helpless to mass murderers more desirable?

[SecularMotion]

35. True Believers are just as extreme as No-Planers/Truthers.

The majority of Americans and people around the world question the official story of 9/11. The two extreme groups on either side of the issue drown out all reasonable discussion of the events of 9/11.

If you're a True Believer, it's a waste of time discussing the issues with you.

[Nuclear Unicorn]

42. wow...talk about extremism

I want to talk about your extremism for keeping people disarmed even though you believe the government will capriciously murder them in the name of fabricating a cause for aggressive war. Why do you oppose the 2nd Amendment?

Back in the day comparisons to the Reichstag were everywhere. Coincidentally, the fascists were very keen on keeping select groups disarmed. Hmmmmm...if I was the sort of girl that went in for conspiracy theories I might start to worry about you.

Or maybe you just have these scattered beliefs and suddenly those beliefs can't be reconciled with each other so you are relying on the ol' "If you don't know there's no point in explaining" dodge.

[SecularMotion]

45. You're avoiding the question and trying to change the subject.

Do you accept the official story of the events of 9/11 as provided by the Bush administration without question?

It's a simple yes or no answer.

[Nuclear Unicorn]

47. No, this is the subject. It's my entire point for joining the thread.

The more correct you are in your belief the more relevant my question becomes. My question assumes you are 100% correct. My question assumes your every assertion about 9/11 is true beyond challenge.

So why do you want to keep people disarmed when their government is willing to slaughter them?

[SecularMotion]

48. Let me know when you're ready to answer the question.

I'm not going to address your second amendment strawman so don't waste your time asking again.

[WinkyDink]

11. And the Illegal Invasion of Iraq that followed was NOT such a slaughter of its own citizens?

A total of 4,486 U.S. soldiers were killed in Iraq between 2003 and 2012.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Casualties_of_the_Iraq_War

Me? I like how nothing---no gold jewelry, no body parts, no vending machines, nada---was found, other than the Immaculate Passport.

Don't get me started.

[CrawlingChaos]

19. Remains

I'll never forget how right after 911 they were finding tiny slivers of human bone on the roof of the Deutsche Bank building. Now how in the hell does something like that happen without the involvement of explosives?

I hear you on your other points as well. And now we have a never-ending war against an unseen, indefinable "enemy" that has brought unfathomable suffering to countless people. There is absolutely nothing these psychopaths wouldn't do.

[zappaman]

20. It's not that difficult to explain.

http://www.nytimes.com/2006/04/06/nyregion/06remains.html?_r=0

A crew of demolition workers discovered 74 bone fragments near the World Trade Center site over the weekend, the largest number of remains found since the end of recovery operations nearly three years ago and a sign that significant quantities of human remains may have gone unnoticed in sporadic searches over the years.

Most of the fragments were found mixed among roof ballast — gravel — that had been raked to the perimeters of the roof of the condemned Deutsche Bank building, officials said. The building, at 130 Liberty Street, stands just south of where the twin towers once loomed, and intensive work began there last month to prepare for its demolition.

The towers rose nearly 800 feet above the roof of the building, which was showered with debris and remains on the morning of Sept. 11, 2001. Because of extensive damage and contamination, the structure was deemed a total loss, but its demolition has been delayed by legal wrangling and concerns about environmental hazards.


What do you think was in that cloud of debris that covered NY?

[CrawlingChaos]

24. Sorry to be graphic, but...

If a building is collapsing due to gravitational force, bodies inside are going to be crushed. For a human body to be turned into tiny fragments and ejected some distance, that suggests explosives.

[Spider Jerusalem]

54. Only if you don't actually have any understanding of physics.

The forces involved in thousands of tonnes of concrete and steel collapsing are quite sufficient to pulverise the estimated 2000 unfortunate people still trapped inside into tiny fragments. The displacement of the air column inside the building was sufficient to cause wide dispersal of particles. It's quite visible if you watch any video footage of the collapse.

[CrawlingChaos]

56. When I watch the video

When I watch the video of the two towers, I see ginormous buildings exploding. Every single observable feature says explosion. It's extremely obvious.

[arely staircase]

37. airplane full of fuel is an explosive

Good gawd almighty.

[CrawlingChaos]

52. But the airplane fuel exploded on impact, outside the building

I don't think that's disputed by anyone. And when an airplane crashes into something and explodes, they find the bodies. You don't find tiny slivers of their bones spread over several city blocks.

Good gawd almighty, indeed.

[arely staircase]

53. nope

it exploded outside

inside

and out the other side

[CrawlingChaos]

55. Pretty sure I'm right about the fuel exploding outside, but either way

As I said in my previous post, when a plane slams into something and explodes, there are bodies. The explosions produced by jet fuel do not turn human bodies into tiny slivers of bone spread over several city blocks.

[arely staircase]

36. those are the only choices?

Believe Bush or be conspiracy whackadoodle?

[SecularMotion]

38. Those are the extremes.

The majority of Americans and people around the world question the official story of 9/11. The two extreme groups on either side of the issue drown out all reasonable discussion of the events of 9/11.

It's a waste of time discussing the issues with a True Believer or No-Planer/Truther.

[linuxman]

33. Look at that!

You're a popular guy. The Onion did an article on you and someone at DU was nice enough to give you your own OP!

[SecularMotion]

39. That might work if I were a Truther, but your attempt to call me an asshole fails.

Are you going to make it past 100 posts this time?

Enjoy your stay!

[Cheap_Trick]

4. It's not like Bush would lie to us or anything.......nt

[X_Digger]

10. *snort* spot on. n/t

[Blue_Tires]

15. Sadly many old 9-11 "truthers" evolved into the Sandy Hook "truthers"

It takes a special kind of asshole to scream up and down about a classroom full of slaughtered kids never existing

[Chan790]

18. I find nothing sad about it.

Many of the 9/11 truthers I've encountered were previously Bilderberg conspiracy theorists, Tri-lateralists, believers in lizard people, etc.

They've always been a "special kind of asshole." Merely different kinds of assholes.

[SecularMotion]

21. Have you watched 9/11 - Press For Truth?

It's not about conspiracy theories.

[Gidney N Cloyd]

25. Happy now?

[BlueCheese]

28. Can't we just compromise?

http://xkcd.com/690/

[Fumesucker]

29. I have always believed the Bush administration was completely candid with us about 9/11

The separate testimony of Bush and Cheney under oath before Congress made it clear they had nothing at all to hide.

[Art_from_Ark]

30. I remember that Star Trek episode

The Enterprise had entered a parallel universe where everything was the opposite of what it was in the "regular" universe.

[Fumesucker]

31. Not *everything* was backwards

Spock was still logical.

[longship]

32. Yes, but there the bad guys all had goatees. nt

[2pooped2pop]

49. did u forget the sarcasm thingy?

I am roflmao on that statement. Oh wait, I see, the testimony under oath. Almost had me.

[Berlum]

41. "Mucho Gracias, Senor iandhr. Smirk." - xCommander George AWOL Bush

[alcibiades_mystery]

44. ROFL

Truther imbeciles.

[polynomial]

50. From my view the picture of Bush

From my view the picture of Bush sitting at a grade school class room in a contemplating way as a first responder is an extraordinary give away. Bush was told a major security issues just happened. A plane with all passengers just crashed into one of the towers. That one tower suspected to be a major economic cog in bond trading. Where his brother is director of the insurance company of that building, this is documented in Gerald Posners book secrets of the kingdom. It gets creepier.

Then probably expecting to hear the news of the second plane crash to finish the deal then strikes minutes later then finally Bush reacts leaving the school. There is something definately wrong with that picture. Thinking as a first responder, I would want to have an immediate action. No sitting around for the second plane to hit. I admit it is my intuition that Bush knew what was happing way before the planes hit. Sitting there was like holding the door for the terrorist.

Another curiosity is the scrap from the tower destruction collected in huge containers from what has been little talked about are the fact those containers have been shipped to China for processing to refine the material to build an Air craft carrier.

Why not have America patriotic business or domestic entities have the opportunity to salvage recycling the building product. Perhaps recycling the domestic environment risked exposure of the crime in treason.

The Chinese being deft in ways of American politics very likely have sifted through and isolated very damaging forensics to condemn a government media cover up. The Bush one percent group Romney included deliver upon request any or all Walmart-able consumer goods in trade or treaty gifts to keep quiet as a bargaining chip. All very well by the one percent profiteers legally elected pirates. Our new trade policy, blow up our citizens and pay the world to keep silent. The perfect Bin laden plan

[justgamma]

51. Benghazi! Here's my answer to this.

1998 a bunch of men said we needed another Pearl Harbor so we can attack Iraq. 2001, these same men are running the country and we get another Pearl Harbor and attack Iraq. Bushes and Bin Ladens are business partners.

Coincidence?