From Ivy League Lawyer to Porn Star

[ismnotwasm]

At 35 years old I’ve found my true calling.

It is so far from the traditions of my family that none of us could have have imagined it. My father was an engineer, my mother an administrator. I played with toy soldiers and models cars as a child, studied languages and literature in college, trained as attorney and even served as a judge.

Yet today, I create and perform in feminist porn.

I grew up in very comfortable circumstances in Mystic, Connecticut, with two loving parents of Northern European Protestant ancestry who graced me with a doting childhood. They taught me I could do anything I wanted as long as I was a good student, so I made academic excellence the focus of my early life. They also taught me to be true to myself, and never to bear ill-will or malice. For them, and ultimately for me, life was about having just intentions above all else

Other fascinating things happened. The more I allowed myself to express my true desires, the more they shifted and changed. Increasingly, my fantasies turned toward women. When I watched porn, all of it was straight. After 12 years of absence, woman returned to my fantasies and dreams, and then to my life

Straight porn is my current frontier. Unfortunately, most of what I’ve viewed of commercial porn promotes a male-centered vision of desire in which men are always erect and women are ever-ready to serve the needs of men. It is vision that has led to cartoonish portrayals of beauty, misogyny, and, in many cases, female exploitation.
Porn can accomplish greater psychological and social good if it becomes more “feminist.” Rather than focusing on men getting off, it can include the complete human sexual experience: intimacy, respect for difference and varying desire, respectful and loving interchange between the genders, and the mutual pursuit of pleasure; and especially, an account of female desires.

To this end I am now creating and performing in videos that I hope will revolutionize pornography.

P
http://www.psychologytomorrowmagazine.com/from-ivy-league-lawyer-to-porn-star/

[bigwillq]

1. Good for him.

I wish him only the best.

[MineralMan]

2. I'm not a porn fan. Lots of people are, I guess.

It will be interesting to see the reactions of people to a man becoming a porn star, versus a woman doing the same thing. Personally, I can't imagine making a choice to do porn. But, I suppose some people make that choice willingly. Others, I assume, make it out of a lack of options or due to coercion. In most cases, we don't know.

But, it's wasted on me. I'm not a viewer of porn.

[MineralMan]

3. It looks like this post is going to die without a lot of

replies. That's interesting, I think.

[ismnotwasm]

5. It's exactly what I expected

I'm not a fan either, for some of the reasons this man states. I find it interesting a thread on a collage age female porn actor would receive the usual attention and divisiveness, and a story about a male porn actor with a little more nuance doesn't seem to inspire discussion.

Ah well

[MineralMan]

8. Yes. Ah, well...

It sort of delineates the double standard, doesn't it.

[opiate69]

22. I'm not sure why you'd be surprised...

Men in the adult entertainment industries aren't generally considered to be victims of misandry for their choice, or shamed because they choose that career path, or accused of being mentally Ill for making that choice. But, because these accusations crop up whenever women in the sex/porn industry are discussed, and there hapoens to be people who strongly sausage with those assumptions, naturally a more um... "spirited" discussion is going to ensue.

[ismnotwasm]

29. I'm NOT surprised as I stated

Men and women aren't seen the same in the industry as a glance at internet porn will show you.

I posted this to see what kind of responses it would get, and to see, if by using a feminist friendly male who sees some of the problems with the porn industry, if a reasonable discussion could evolve, instead of polarized sides. Like I said a social experiment

[opiate69]

34. in the post I originally replied to, you must certainly left the impression that you at least hoped

To be surprised. Hence my comment..

[BainsBane]

40. Just as you predicted.

[bullwinkle428]

4. I'm willing to admit my own biases emerged when I first began reading this -

I was very quick to assume the subject of the piece was a woman, scanning quickly across the words and seeing the idea of an alternative to "tradtional porn".

[ismnotwasm]

6. +1

[loli phabay]

7. good point, i thought it was a female too, no idea why its a big shock though that guys star in

porn. guys in porn are a huge part of the market.

[ismnotwasm]

9. He also has an interesting story

And appear to want to change the culture of porn a bit.

[loli phabay]

11. yeah saw that, a lot of people who do porn are professionals who do it for fun and exhibition

the whole free porn thing is changing the face of porn with more and more amateur stuff being out there. Will be interesting to see how it all morphs with new technologies.

[quinnox]

10. His body, his choice

I would never consider something like this, just as I would not consider getting a tattoo. But that is me. Others can do whatever.

[closeupready]

12. He's an idiot. But hey, what do I know.

[Warren DeMontague]

13. I've read that there is actually a surplus of lawyers, right now.

Not sure if that plays into this, but, I support anyone who tries to pursue a life they find personally fulfilling. Life is too short to do otherwise. He's an adult, he can make his own decisions about his body.

[loli phabay]

16. this, do what makes you happy.

[cali]

14. yeah, this is just sooo important. gad, how du has sunk.

self absorbed twit. I could fucking give a flying fuck.

[quinnox]

15. lol

Don't hold back!

[ismnotwasm]

19. Ah yes you

I forgot.

[geek tragedy]

17. forget about the porn star thing, anyone who calls himself an "ivy league lawyer"

is a first-order narcissist.

Unless he's in the legal department of Harvard, Brown, etc.

I bet he also learned to play guitar because of his love of music.

We'll see how the commitment to feminist principles lasts once bills become due.

[ismnotwasm]

18. He won't be able too

It's inimical.

This post was a social experiment. I've been doing that here and there it's interesting.

[RobertEarl]

23. How do you make feminist porn?

And BTW, i could use a job. Just behind the scenes.

But you seem to be a follower of this, so maybe you can tell us the what and how of feminist porn?

[ismnotwasm]

25. It's an idea proposed by certain feminists

I believe the idea is a story line around activity that doesn't objectify the female body. It's evolved out of 3rd wave feminists and the 'sex positive" feminists.

Here's an interesting little article on it

http://www.feministe.us/blog/archives/2008/07/23/feminist-porn-sex-consent-and-getting-off/

I don't like porn, I think it's broken and boring. But sexual images have been around a long time, there are certainly not going away. There are a number of problem with "feminist porn" the main one being nobody will buy it, because there is an inherent problem with porn; one of which that has to do with sexual repression and shame-- and looking for release of these things. Another is the filters in which we view the erotic.

Go ahead and look around. Even Ron Jeremy works on and off.

[geek tragedy]

41. Yeah who looks for porn thinking "I want to find something that's

socially acceptable and respectful of everyone involved?"

Most of the appeal is that you're not supposed to enjoy it.

[Skittles]

27. I think the idea is that it would involve activity women might actually enjoy

[ismnotwasm]

30. Thank you

I hope a little actual erotic activity as well. You'll see that occasionally in soft core, but the story lines are abysmal

[Skittles]

32. ? that's what I meant

actual erotic activity that women might enjoy

[bluestate10]

38. Feminist porn is focused on the needs and desires of the woman involved in the sex act.

I am no fan of porn, but I have watched it and felt that all that I saw was purely male focused. There is Lesbian porn, but that is a category in itself.

[one_voice]

20. He should do what he wants to do...

he owes no one an explanation. His body, his choice.

Same for a woman if she so chooses.

[Warren DeMontague]

21. Gives a whole new meaning to "passing the bar"

No, seriously, I dont know what that means.

[ismnotwasm]

26. BAD pun

You can do better

[Warren DeMontague]

33. Sure, everyone's a critic

the defense rests.

[Orrex]

35. Now who will file his briefs?

[Warren DeMontague]

37. That's much, much better.

[rrneck]

24. Art marches on. nt

[LadyHawkAZ]

28. Excellent article, thanks for posting.

[LittleBlue]

31. Interesting career choice

I wish him well

[reformist2]

36. As jobs disappear from top to bottom, a lot of people will turn to prostitution.

[bluestate10]

39. I have migrated toward the same view. People that one would have never imagined being

in prostitution will end up in that activity, that includes men and women that are highly educated and come from privilege. The super rich don't have to worry about their children becoming prostitutes unless their children want to work out some kinks on their wild side. Middleclass parents certainly must worry about their sons and daughters entering prostitution as a way to pay bills, that is the sad result of our nation's industrial and business policy of the last 33+ years.