U.S. Freezes Putin’s Netflix Account

[geardaddy]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—In what was described as a major ramping up of sanctions, Secretary of State John Kerry announced on Tuesday that the United States had frozen Russian President Vladimir Putin’s Netflix account, effective immediately.

“Unless and until Mr. Putin calls off the annexation of Crimea, no more ‘House of Cards’ or ‘Orange Is the New Black’ for him,” Mr. Kerry said. “The United States will not stand by and reward the annexation of another sovereign nation with a policy of streaming as usual.”

While all of the sanctions Mr. Kerry announced on Tuesday were Netflix-related, he warned Mr. Putin that “nothing is off the table.”

“I’m sure I don’t need to remind the Russian President that ‘Game of Thrones’ is about to come back for another season,” he said. “As I have said, this thing could get very ugly, very fast.”

http://www.newyorker.com/online/blogs/borowitzreport/2014/03/us-freezes-putins-netflix-account.html

[Brother Buzz]

1. LOL, that'll teach him

Andy Borowitz keeps knocking 'em out of the park!

[geardaddy]

3. Yep!

[Brother Buzz]

11. He just may eclipse The Yankee Clipper's hitting streak

[Tx4obama]

2. For folks that don't know: The Borowitz Report, The Onion, Free Wood Post, DailyCurrant - are SATIRE

[geardaddy]

4. Yes.

[LittleBlue]

5. LMAO

Hope Kerry isn't reading this, he might actually try it.

[geardaddy]

12. That would be awesome.

[dipsydoodle]

6. Now that is funny.

[geardaddy]

7. I can just see him

sitting down with popcorn in fluffy slippers trying to watch Walking Dead or something.

[Nye Bevan]

8. Good. And for the next country he grabs, disable his Hulu Plus subscription (nt)

[Blanks]

22. That's pulling out all the stops. Putin is toast if he doesn't chill out. eom

[oldandhappy]

9. LOL

That will surely teach him not to invade another country. Now, can we cancel Netflix for Bush for invading other countries??

[AngryAmish]

10. good one

[Gothmog]

13. I love good satire

[longship]

14. "streaming as usual"

Borowitz is the best!
R&

[geardaddy]

18. Yes! That was hilarious!

[Democracyinkind]

15. This is one of the best pieces of satire ever. nt

[ananda]

16. Lol. That was funny!

Thanks.

[hughee99]

17. Well, at least he won't have to worry about his ISP throttling his Netflix service. n/t

[cui bono]

20. Silly Kerry, Game of Thrones is on HBO so new season isn't on Netflix for a long, long time anyway.

Sheesh.

[bvar22]

21. THis "should" be funny, but it is NOT.

The "sanctions" announced yesterday by President Obama amount to little more than this.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/10024679557

[BlueJac]

23. idiots.......

I am not amazed at the stupidity. Was he borrowing the Iraq Invasion Movie by GWB.

[shenmue]

24. No way are they going to take away my Midsomer Murders!

By durn, I'll fight!

[MerryBlooms]

25. You have excellent taste in tv series.

I'm hopelessly addicted.

[shenmue]

27. Thank you

[IDemo]

26. This could get ugly real fast

Duck and cover, kids!

[wandy]

28. Na. Netflix is too is too woosey for a man who wrestles bars.........

and rides horses bare,,,, something.

Just you wait until John Kerry turns Comcast loose and slows down Putin’s HULU+ account.
Or even package RT with a cartoon station carrying only "my little pony".

That, will make the buggers eyes water!

That can happen now you know.

[lillypaddle]

29. Tired of people posting this shit

and not identifying that it is satire/BS. Don't waste my time. You aren't funny.

[LuvLoogie]

30. Putin Kisses Crimea

[TxDemChem]

31. Lol those sanctions would kill my teenaged daughter

I live his musings!

[1monster]

32. Damn! Label these things satire from the first line! It's so hard to tell reality from satire

anymore!

[SummerSnow]

33. Nyet-flix

oh my

[geardaddy]

35. Ha!

[Marrah_G]

36. hahahahahaha!

[adirondacker]

34. We'll know when he's a real threat when they shut down his Pay Pal account. nt

[treestar]

37. This sort of lacks in that

Power is far more entertaining; someone like Pooty does not watch tv or movies, you can bet on that. He doesn't have time for it and would find it boring. Pooty has power to affect the real world and all of his "entertainment" is about doing things to further that.