Wonkette: Cool Proposed Massachusetts Law Would Make Sure You Don’t Spread Your Legs...

[geardaddy]

Cool Proposed Massachusetts Law Would Make Sure You Don’t Spread Your Legs Until Your Divorce Is Final

http://wonkette.com/544695/cool-proposed-massachusetts-law-would-make-sure-you-dont-spread-your-legs-until-your-divorce-is-final


Usually we dig on Massachusetts because it is chock full of gay-loving liberals (though we are a little worried about your Jew-jailing schoolchildren right now) but that is because we forget about the weird Republicans that also inhabit the Bay State. Recently, one of them coughed up this dog’s breakfast of an idea: why not punish slutty slut slut people who think they can just get divorced all willy nilly and still keep having sex?

In divorce, separation, or 209A proceedings involving children and a marital home, the party remaining in the home shall not conduct a dating or sexual relationship within the home until a divorce is final and all financial and custody issues are resolved, unless the express permission is granted by the courts.

Totally reasonable!


Who doesn’t want to wait for a judge to give you the go-ahead to have sex, even though you are already an adult person! And also, we have no idea how the law gets enforced. Does the court get to come over and hang out at your house to make sure you don’t do the nasty? Do you have to have court-supervised visits with any possible gender of people you might want to have sex with, because lord knows one moment you’re just hanging out and then you realize it is date and holy crap you have broken Massachusetts law now and you should go to jail forever and ever, or at least not get custody of your kids.

It doesn’t take a genius to realize this is just a way for people going through a divorce — people who are already MASSIVELY PISSED OFF at one another — to fuck with each other during the divorce and custody process by declaring that they are certain that the other parent is getting some illicit nookie and is therefore unfit.

Also too, given Massachusetts’ divorce timeframe, you could be waiting quite a while to get laid.

Massachusetts law currently mandates a waiting period of at least 120 days for divorces to become finalized, and that’s only after a judge has approved the separation agreement. In other words, it could take at least four months, if not longer, before a person getting a divorce is legally allowed to fornicate.

More at link.

[LiberalAndProud]

1. I'm not a fan of legislating this.

But I do think that parents should be very cognizant of their children's emotional well being when it comes to bringing their dates home.

[geardaddy]

2. I agree with that.

But it's the parent's choice, not the state's.

[LiberalAndProud]

3. We agree.

I think this law writer was probably well intentioned. But overreach is overreach.

[Kber]

4. There's also the fact that it is often women who remain in the home

Caring for the children. This bill would make it illegal for her to be sexually active, while her husband who has left her can boink away.

I'm sure this would disproportionately affect women.

[geardaddy]

5. Good observation.

Thanks.

[Zorra]

6. That's simply unworkable. Not to mention silly. nt

[geardaddy]

8. Oh, I know.

It's completely ridiculous. Why these people try to legislate sexual activity is beyond me.

[In_The_Wind]

7. That is totally ridiculous.

[geardaddy]

9. Yep

Nice pic.

[wandy]

10. More job opportunity for lawyers.............................

"shall not conduct a dating or sexual relationship within the home until a divorce is final and all financial and custody issues are resolved, unless the express permission is granted by the courts."

All financial and custody issues are resolved.

Wow! Obtaining court permission! Lawyer bills until you're offspring leave the nest.

Sure does sound like another Teapublican scam to generate profit in the name of god.

[Kelvin Mace]

11. Wait, I have a message from beyond the grave

It's from Johnny Cash:

[JJChambers]

12. Anti-Cohabitation clauses are frequently included in child custody decrees even after divorce

These decrees mandate that neither parent may have a dating or sexual partner stay the night at their residence during their period of custody. These are already COMMON.

[pipi_k]

13. Well, to be fair...

It doesn't say a separated person can't have sex at all.

What it says is this:

In divorce, separation, or 209A proceedings involving children and a marital home, the party remaining in the home shall not conduct a dating or sexual relationship within the home

So, OK it seems draconian if you're the one in the home with the children.

But say you're the parent who left the home. You don't have the children.

Does anyone here really think they're going to be OK with their estranged spouse bringing sex partners home and shacking up with them in the home, where the children are before all the arrangements are finalized?

In some cases, the spouse who left the home and kids behind isn't going to be OK with that even AFTER the divorce is final.

And some people can't let go even after their ex spouse has remarried.

So what the hell?


If you're the one left behind in the home with the kids and you want to have sex, get a babysitter and go to a motel room.

I don't see anything in that excerpt which says that would be illegal.



PS...as far as the dating relationship goes, I can also see the point there. Nobody's kids need to be seeing a procession of "uncles" or "aunties" making their way through the home while their parents are still legally married although living apart.

And if a parent can't consider the kids' emotional well being instead of his/her own selfish wants, then there's something real fucked up there.

[Marrah_G]

14. It will never pass

Was just a stupid idea from one of the very few repukes.