Study: Average cost of U.S. wedding increases to about $30K

[MineralMan]

http://www.wtop.com/1226/3593307/Study-Average-wedding-costs-30K

WASHINGTON -- Here comes the bride -- followed by a big, fat bill.

The average cost of a wedding in America last year was about $30,000, according to a survey from the wedding planning website, The Knot.

The study, released March 27, found that the average wedding cost in 2013 was the highest since the website began monitoring prices in 2007. The average cost -- which came to $29,858 -- didn't include the cost of a honeymoon.

The Knot cofounder Carley Roney says couples want to create an experience for guests, which can lead to higher overall costs.

More at link...

This is interesting, I think. The cost seems to go up every year, but I never seem to go to any weddings that cost anywhere near that amount. Whose weddings cost this much, I wonder? Has anyone recently been to a $30K wedding? I think these numbers are manufactured by the wedding planning industry, and don't reflect actual real-world weddings in general. By inflating the actual costs for all weddings, the industry appears to be creating an expectation that feeds the industry.

So, tell us about the $30K weddings you've attended, or the weddings you've attended that cost nothing like that much. I think these numbers are way overstated and are based only on weddings planned by wedding planners. Maybe that's the problem.

[sufrommich]

1. Unbelievable,my wedding was outside on the shores

of Lake Huron in the U.P.,the food and drinks took up most of the cost and it was still shy of $5000. Why anyone would blow that kind of cash on a one day wedding as opposed to a down payment on a house or some other lifelong expense is beyond me. Morons.

[Luminous Animal]

5. I went to a 100K wedding once.

It was more for the dad to show off. The couple didn't know half the guests.

[sufrommich]

7. So what does a $100,000 wedding look like?

I can't even imagine what could be worth that much for a one day celebration.

[pnwmom]

16. Very crowded. Several hundred people and lots of booze. n/t

[Luminous Animal]

20. Limos for all the guests from the wedding site to the reception.

Hand tied flowers on the hedges. It was crowded because he leased the entire yacht club which included a large terrace several large rooms and balconies galore. A sit down dinner for 200 people with 3 wait staff for every table of 8. A full bar. 6 feet talk flower arrangements. I had a blast.

[Warpy]

2. My favorite wedding was the one where the ceremony itself

was family only, a relative who was a preacher officiating. The happy couple then ditched the relatives to go on a short honeymoon and when they came back they threw their reception at the local Grange Hall, a covered dish affair where bakers brought various cakes to be assembled together into a 3 tier job on the spot, each tier supported by overturned wine glasses. The cake was beyond interesting, a single piece could be carrot, applesauce, chocolate, or whatever, sometimes 3 different flavors at a time.

The bride and groom bought several cases of champagne and the party was wild.

The only cleanup consisted of carting the empties to the dump for recycling and everybody taking their own dishes home to wash.

I really hate the "traditional" jobs where everything is choreographed, cliche after cliche, usually with a wedding planner having hysterics and trying to move things along, s/he has another wedding in a couple of hours, stuff your faces, get drunk, have a couple of dances and go, already.

My ex and I felt the same about weddings, so we eloped.

[Populist_Prole]

30. I attended some that were so corny and cliche I rolled my eyes and groaned constantly

Obnoxious DJs, the disco-ized versions of really bad top-40 hits, trite choreographing, video camera crews in everyone's face all the time while egging comments from people. I mean, it's supposed to be a dignified celebration, not a spectacle. I would have been embarrassed if I were the couple, but then I think it's a much a case of it being more of a show for the parents too.

[NightWatcher]

3. Dawn wedding at the beach, no attendees, photog was a friend.

I don't recall how much the whole shebang cost including a week in the mountains at a cabin but I know it was less than 5K.

[TreasonousBastard]

4. Meh-- they don't define "average" although...

I suspect they mean the mean.

So, surveying 13,000 brides could mean a few 200 grand weddings throw off the whole thing.

[lumberjack_jeff]

6. The median would probably be less eye-popping. n/t

[eridani]

27. And the mode probably less eye-popping than that, wven

That's one of the good things about DU--most of the posters here probably understand this subthread, and the rest are willing to google it if they have the time.

[Hoyt]

8. When my late wife and I were married in early 1990s, it was a "$35 and a picture ID" ceremony.

It was wonderful. We laughed/smiled for years about that little trip to a small Tennessee town.

I had a cousin from a wealthy family who had a big ceremony, with "1000 of his/her closest friends." What a waste, even if you have the money. But, they viewed much of life as a promotional activity.

[MineralMan]

11. I will say this, though.

I used to play in a woodwind quintet, and we played for a lot of weddings and receptions. Some of those were quite large and expensive, so I guess I've been at the equivalent of several $30K weddings in the past. Considering inflation, I'm sure some of those were at that scale.

Best thing about playing those weddings was access to decent beverages and food.

[MineralMan]

9. My wedding 22 years ago, almost,

was at my house. The minister, a Universal Life Church guy, who was also a bass player musician friend, charged $50 and whatever he could consume at the wedding. My wife and I got married under a big tree in the front yard. All of my family drove up from Southern California, about 2.5 hours away and her family flew out, at our expense from Illinois, Minnesota, and Florida, but they paid for their own lodging. Lots of friends showed up who lived where I lived.

Airfares were cheap enough, but I don't remember what the four round-trip tickets cost. Not a lot, though.

Our reception was in the backyard, and featured about a gross of tamales made by my mother, a couple of jumbo pizzas and a one sheet wedding cake from the local bakery. The whole shebang might have cost $1000 or maybe $1200. Beverages were obtained in a run to the local liquor store, but some of the guests went and got those.

And we're still married, despite our bargain basement wedding. My previous wedding might have cost slightly more, but her parents covered that one and so I don't really know.

[lumpy]

10. The only people that can afford a 30K weddng are those who can afford it ...I hope.

[MineralMan]

12. I suspect not. I'm betting a lot of families go into debt to throw

a big wedding for their daughter. I know I've seen that happen.

[marions ghost]

21. Wrong. They go into debt all the time

I went to a 30K wedding in my family. The folks putting it on could not really afford it, but you know...anything for their daughter's big day. I think they might regret it now.

Honestly I couldnt see where the money went. It was nice, but not fahbulous. The flowers cost a couple thou. The dress was a thou. Many maids and groomsmen. Formal attire. The cake was extreme. Music was live. Location picturesque. Fully catered evening meal with wine and beer. All adds up I guess.

The wedding planners must have raked it in.

[gollygee]

22. Oh, no no no

I've gone to a couple of 30k weddings by people who absolutely can't afford it. People are willing to go deep into debt for weddings. Stupid people.

[Brickbat]

13. Those figures, according to the survey, are based on respondents who hired a professional vendor for

services. So it eliminates all weddings where people did things themselves. It's skewed, and it's not news.

[MineralMan]

15. Ah. Thanks! I suspected as much.

It's a promotional story, printed as news, then. It sure got covered all over the place, though. News that's not news seems to be a staple these days.

[TreasonousBastard]

18. Where's it say that?

I'm not doubting it, since the really cheap, err, financially responsible couples wouldn't be spending much time WeddingChannel, but it still doesn't seem to say so.

But, yeah, eloping, marriages in Town Hall, by the beach, in prison... not in the survey.

"About TheKnot.com 2013 Real Weddings Survey
The 2013 Real Weddings Survey captured responses from nearly 13,000 US brides married between January 1 and December 31, 2013. Respondents were recruited throughout the year from TheKnot.com and WeddingChannel.com membership, which represents nearly 80% of brides nationwide. Brides received survey invitations shortly after their wedding date and were asked a comprehensive series of questions about the event and their planning process. All qualified respondents attested that they:

Were 18 or older
Had a wedding in 2013

Survey respondents represent a variety of ethnicities and educational and income levels, and are geographically dispersed across the country. The survey and data management partner for the study was Decipher Inc"

[pnwmom]

14. I think they inflate those numbers, for obvious reasons. The industry wants to encourage

everyone to think they need to spend as much as possible.

But a wedding planner won't necessarily make things cost more. We used one, and paid for two days worth of her services (including day of). She helped us avoid costly mistakes and kept us in our budget. And when a big problem came up on the day itself with one of the vendors, she was there to handle it. And since the vendor wanted to work with her in the future, we got instant action. I doubt that we had the clout ourselves to have that kind of success.

[csziggy]

17. We skipped the wedding and have a civil union!

I love to say that to my husband's conservative relatives!

We paid maybe $15 for the license, woke up our friend, the pizza cook and notary public, handed him his jeans he'd left in the living room (good option since he tended to go commando), then he signed the license. His girlfriend signed as a witness, we hunted down someone else for the other witness, and it was done.

We did not intend for any celebration, but word got out and about 30 people showed up at our house that afternoon and evening and a party was held by all.

The next day we took the license into the county clerk's office to make it all official.

It worked - that was in July 1977 and we're still together.


If we'd had $30k back then, there were a lot of much more important things we would have spent it on than a wedding!

[Nay]

33. So did we. The idea of paying such money for a wedding would never, ever

even cross my mind.

[csziggy]

35. Well, I never liked parties

And I had been in the weddings of two of my three sisters and hated all the crap that goes along with a wedding.

In fact, I was a little pissed our friends showed up to give us a party the night we made it official. It was not something I really wanted. At least it was relaxed and spontaneous and only people who really cared about us showed up so I made the best of it.

[mokawanis]

19. My wedding cost about $700 in 1982

Food, booze, and a DJ playing music. What we saved on wedding expenses we used for the honeymoon.

[Proud Public Servant]

23. I've been to one

years ago -- high mass in a cathedral, reception at one of the toniest hotels in America, hundreds of guests. I guarentee the debt incurred lasted longer than the marriage.

[JI7]

24. bridezillas and needing to show off to others

most of the spending is on things that are not needed for the wedding at all.

[PasadenaTrudy]

25. Ugh. I hate weddings

I never got married, nor did I attend many weddings. Baby showers are the grossest though. Yuck on all these hetero-normative rituals, lol

[La Lioness Priyanka]

26. that's how much my wedding cost and i am hardly a bridezilla

there are certain things our parents wanted (that they paid for: open bar, good food), which costs a lot of money in NYC. add to that, that we both have a large family/friends circle, it was really difficult to keep it at 30,000

[exboyfil]

28. My wife and I had a rather simple wedding

Two attendants each. Ushers and fathers in suits and not tuxes. Bride got her dress from a consignment shop (the prettiest dress I have ever seen). Reception at church so no alcohol (we don't drink). Not a sit down dinner. Wife's oldest sister was an equivalent wedding to ours (it was the last of the sibling weddings). Her brother had a big Catholic wedding (I would guess $10 to $15K in today's dollars). Her younger sister had a huge blowout which was every bit of $30K in today's dollars (huge attendance with a sit down dinner). The rehersal dinner was also pricey. My brother also had a small wedding and a cook out after the ceremony (lots of guests some who were not invited). He probably dropped $5K or so in today's dollars.

I have two daughters (18 and 16). I suspect they will be in their 20s before they marry (but who knows). Neither date right now (I keep them too busy). My oldest is going to have a large pool to chose from next year as she goes into mechanical engineering (only about 10% women). She will also be in class with older men (she is starting as a 2nd semester sophomore/1st semester junior). Frankly I think she should be making enough money to pay for her own wedding. The other is planning on medical school so she may be out several years.

[liberal N proud]

29. The secret is to find a small town in middle of the country

Our daughter got married a year ago in Missouri.

Church was $150
Ballroom was $500
Dinner was $15/plate and was as good as food 3X as expensive.

If we would have had the wedding here in Ohio or Florida where she lives it would have been every bit $30K

[rudolph the red]

31. I spent 10k on my daughters wedding 5 years ago

It was a grand affair, but it still irks me.

[rrneck]

32. Looks like a racket to me.

People that sell that stuff are hogs at the emotional trough.

[tammywammy]

34. I've been to weddings that cost a lot more than $30k and some that cost a lot less.

Money doesn't make the wedding. My favorite weddings include one at the courthouse, a backyard, Cancun, and a traditional church with the reception at a nice place.

Least favorite: where the bride was rude and overall trashy.

[Earth_First]

36. My wife and I got married in August.

We spent 10K total including our B&B/Microbrewery tour of Vermont.

I couldn't imagine spending almost three times that amount.

[flvegan]

37. I have to make a "consider the source" pleading here.

Theknot.com. Go visit that site. I don't think they cater to the REAL "average" wedding. And if they do, I find it funny.

[lonestarnot]

38. For richie rich and nutjobs maybe.