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Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsBREAKING: Romney names running mate
SAT MAR 31, 2012 AT 01:37 PM PDT
BREAKING: Romney names running mate
by misterajc
The Romney campaign today announced a surprise pick for Vice President Exxon Mobil Corporation. This is a game changing decision, that will really energize the true Republican base: Koch Industries, Haliburton, Walmart, Bechtel, Fox and Shell BP, said a Romney spokesman. It's also a breakthrough for minority rights, as it's the first time a Corporate American had appeared on the ballot. With subsidiaries in fifty eight countries and puppet regimes in six, Exxon Mobil brings to the ticket foreign policy experience focused on the only countries that matter the ones with oil.
When questioned by reporters about the vetting process, the spokesman said that it had been completed in a record forty eight hours by Exxon Mobil staff. Asked about the possible conflict of interest, the spokesman revealed that Exxon had been vetted by the same Exxon public servants who wrote the Cheney administration's energy policy, so they were ideally qualified for vetting a Vice Presidential candidate.
Exxon Mobil is expected to self finance the campaign. We would have paid for it anyway, said their CEO, But now we get a place on the ticket, too. I know there are some racists out there who don't think that Corporate Americans are real Americans, or even real people, but this election will prove them wrong.
A spokesman for the Obama campaign said they were not commenting on the constitutionality of this announcement until they had seen Exxon Mobil's birth certificate.
http://www.dailykos.com/story/2012/03/31/1079533/-BREAKING-Romney-names-running-mate
In a similar vein (from the comments), this future newspaper clipping:
JohnnyRingo
(18,628 posts)Romney/Exxon 2012
Danascot
(4,690 posts)most people wouldn't realize it was irony.
freshwest
(53,661 posts)Loudmxr
(1,405 posts)DallasNE
(7,402 posts)Just ask Franklin Graham.
golfguru
(4,987 posts)I think we have had enough Christian presidents. And that includes president Obama.
Time to break the religious bigotry. Religious ceiling needs to be smashed because my
daughter dreams about running for president in 25 years. She may run as a Hindu.
Ikonoklast
(23,973 posts)go for it.
"I may vote for Romney".
There's a surprise.
golfguru
(4,987 posts)Romney is the first non-Christian running for president since I immigrated here 50 years ago.
If there is so much hate against Mormons whose religion originated in USA, what happens
when my kids run for president as Hindu's? Religious bigotry must end and end soon. My
feelings against these bigots is so strong, I may just end up voting for the 1st non-Christian.
aint_no_life_nowhere
(21,925 posts)It could launch the start of a wonderful theocracy in America since Republicans worship money.
flamingdem
(39,313 posts)go, oh go mittens
Little Star
(17,055 posts)krispos42
(49,445 posts)Note the date... January 17, 2001!
libodem
(19,288 posts)Corporations are people, too.
Leave them alone.
Ruby the Liberal
(26,219 posts)Of the United Corporations of America.
aint_no_life_nowhere
(21,925 posts)An android and a legal construct running for highest office. Of course.
Brother Buzz
(36,416 posts)Exxon Mobil Corporation was formed on November 30, 1999, by the merger of Exxon and Mobil.
I know, "Picky, picky, picky".
Canuckistanian
(42,290 posts)Future headline.