Brain development is a fascinating thing.
There are a couple of times when the brain goes through a pruning process, getting rid of some of the unused neural connections to allow development of others. The physiological changes in the brain are related to some familiar developmental behaviors. That first process? During toddlerhood, commonly referred to as "the terrible 2s," although that period is not specifically restricted to two-year-olds. It's a time of developing motor skills and language, and a transition to more independence because of those two things. There is also a developing self-awareness. At that age, it's all about "me." The child is the center of the universe, and determined to explore, conquer, and rule.
The second big transition? Adolescence. Beginning at about 11 years old. It's very similar to the "terrible twos:" becoming more independent, this time socially rather than physically. Separating further from their adults and bonding with their age peers. One of the big characteristics of the age is impulsivity. The speak and act before thinking that so many parents and adults working with adolescents struggle with. They are also again developing a different kind of self-awareness, and the "all about me" factor kicks in again strongly. Really, this stage is much like the terrible twos.
Except that they are bigger physically, and the hormone rush and confusion of puberty kicks in. So...puberty. The terrible twos on hormones. This is why teenagers, especially middle school age teens, scare so many adults. It's also why very, very few people ever remember their own experience with this age as positive, regardless of how positive their environment was. The terrible tweens, which are generally designated as 10-12, but actually start slow and extend a couple of years beyond.
As a matter of fact, this age scares enough adults that there is often a consensus that authoritarian over-restrictions are necessary for them to survive. The "lock-em up until they're 21" mentality. And, of course, there are some grounds for that consensus, as impulsive teenagers do stupid, reckless, dangerous things, and some of them DON'T survive.
So...maintaining order in a middle school? It can be done. It often isn't. The very first reason it often isn't is simply because of the way we've structured the system. We take all those big, strong, terrible twos on hormones and throw them into a large institutional setting, where the student-adult ratio is much too high and the kids are all crowded together with only age peers. That's a really unnatural environment that exacerbates the challenges of the age while minimizing the ability to nurture their strengths. In a departmentalized system, there IS no single adult responsible for each individual throughout the day, and it's easy for kids to fall through cracks, and for issues to go unnoticed.
How to resolve that? I'm sure there are lots of ways. I'll share the way I've worked with them for a couple of decades now; it's the only way I have personal evidence of success for.
First of all, schools need to be small and the student-adult ratio needs to be low. That in itself means that more of the adults are likely to know each student, and know them better, than in those larger institutional settings.
Secondly, schools need to be K-8. It's a better, and more realistic, environment than isolating them away from everyone else like they've got the plague is. In a K-8 setting, they are surrounded by all of their former teachers who see them passing each day. There are fewer of them, as they are only a small segment of the school population, which, as already indicated, should be small anyway.
In that setting, they have their teachers longer and develop stronger relationships with them. That's key. They also spend a lot of time being taught how to be positive leaders in their school. They work with younger grades and their teachers on a regular basis. They are empowered and feel ownership of their school.
Also, it being smaller, with more adults around, and having those adults know them, not just by name but by who they are, means that all kinds of little things that go unnoticed in larger environments don't. Like social dramas, social cliques, bullying in the hall, field, bathroom, etc.. It gets noticed quickly, addressed more quickly, and the students themselves often are the first addressing those kinds of things. Because they have stronger relationships with adults, they are more likely to go to an adult when problems crop up, and to speak more openly to adults about those problems.
That's how it's worked for me, anyway.
Here is how we handle passing periods and lunch breaks at my little school:
First of all, our bathrooms are right outside our classroom doors, as are their lockers. We can hear them. We can see them if we are anywhere near the doorway. There is a restroom right outside the cafeteria, as well.
They get a 5 minute passing period between classes, and they have no more than a single hallway, the length of 4 classrooms, with bathrooms and lockers between, to travel.
In each class, there is a log kept. Any student may leave the classroom once during the period to go to bathrooms or lockers; he signs out, with the time and signs in with the time. That must happen during independent work time, not during whole-class instruction. One boy and one girl may be signed out at any one time.
Of course, any emergencies are in addition to that. My students with health issues may get up and head to the restroom or health office at any time without asking and without a pass. I ask them to make eye contact with me so that I know it's a health issue, and that's that. Adolescent girls whose cycles aren't regular let me know. If they are embarrassed, they give me a single key word, and head out. Most aren't embarrassed, but the key word is used more frequently with their male teachers.
Those logs are helpful. We don't actually have to use them too often, but they allow the students some independence in managing their needs. They also provide a record when any bathroom vandalism happens. That's rare, and usually involves a student with mental health issues. Last year, someone kept urinating on the floor in our boys' room. Our boys were pissed, and they used the log religiously as evidence that it wasn't them, and reported incidents religiously. Male teachers near that bathroom did periodic checks. We had a small list of suspects which the logs helped us narrow down to the boy who left during class each day for the behavior program that included intensive therapy. It seems that whenever they were making breakthroughs in therapy, the stress of confronting the events that had damaged him caused him to act out in various ways. Because of our small, transparent setting, most of his usual acting-out patterns weren't working for him, so he developed something new.
The bottom line, though, is that it's possible to manage adolescents, and problems with them, without draconian measures, given the right setting and supports.
By high school, they are leaving that developmental stage behind. So while they, and their brains, are not yet mature, they've grown out of the terrible tweens.
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