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Fri Aug 29, 2014, 10:15 PM

Ssssh... Trigger Warning

Daddy, stop hurting me! Please stop hurting me.



He says softly, do not tell. Never tell.



She remains silent.



Shame Hurt Fear Guilt Anger



Domestic Violence..or an accident



Ssssh. Don't tell.



Shattered.








White Ribbon Day

Celebrities, sportsmen, politicians, community leaders, businessmen and thousands of men and women across Australia will mark White Ribbon Day, 25 November, the UN’s International Day for Elimination of Violence against Women, by joining together and swearing: 'never to commit, excuse or remain silent about violence against women.’

As one of Australia’s well-respected voices of opinion and news you are in a unique position to help raise awareness and create positive change around the issue of violence against women.

http://www.whiteribbon.org.au/update/media-should-sw-r-this-white-ribbon-day





No More Silence. We Speak.



We are Strong.



To all of you~

We Will Not Sit Down and We Will Not Shut Up! This is about us.






52 replies, 17797 views

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Arrow 52 replies Author Time Post
Reply Ssssh... Trigger Warning (Original post)
sheshe2 Aug 2014 OP
Tuesday Afternoon Aug 2014 #1
Kath1 Aug 2014 #2
sheshe2 Aug 2014 #3
Kath1 Aug 2014 #4
sheshe2 Aug 2014 #6
Kath1 Aug 2014 #7
sheshe2 Aug 2014 #8
spanone Aug 2014 #5
AverageJoe90 Aug 2014 #9
littlemissmartypants Aug 2014 #10
sheshe2 Aug 2014 #49
Mnemosyne Aug 2014 #11
Spitfire of ATJ Aug 2014 #12
sheshe2 Aug 2014 #13
Manifestor_of_Light Aug 2014 #14
sheshe2 Aug 2014 #16
Manifestor_of_Light Aug 2014 #51
Triana Aug 2014 #19
sheshe2 Aug 2014 #23
Triana Aug 2014 #39
raven mad Aug 2014 #52
Heidi Aug 2014 #15
sheshe2 Aug 2014 #17
classof56 Aug 2014 #30
sheshe2 Aug 2014 #35
Laelth Aug 2014 #18
TBF Aug 2014 #20
sheshe2 Aug 2014 #24
BlancheSplanchnik Aug 2014 #21
Android3.14 Aug 2014 #22
BlueJazz Aug 2014 #25
Android3.14 Aug 2014 #26
BlueJazz Aug 2014 #27
Brickbat Aug 2014 #33
MuseRider Aug 2014 #28
sheshe2 Aug 2014 #29
MuseRider Aug 2014 #42
heaven05 Aug 2014 #31
sheshe2 Aug 2014 #34
IrishAyes Aug 2014 #32
sheshe2 Aug 2014 #47
calimary Aug 2014 #36
sheshe2 Aug 2014 #44
napkinz Aug 2014 #37
sheshe2 Aug 2014 #43
napkinz Aug 2014 #38
AverageJoe90 Aug 2014 #40
sheshe2 Aug 2014 #41
raven mad Aug 2014 #45
sheshe2 Aug 2014 #46
raven mad Aug 2014 #48
sheshe2 Aug 2014 #50

Response to sheshe2 (Original post)

Fri Aug 29, 2014, 10:17 PM

1. DU Rec.

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Response to sheshe2 (Original post)

Fri Aug 29, 2014, 10:26 PM

2. Very powerful images, she.

Thank you.

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Response to Kath1 (Reply #2)

Fri Aug 29, 2014, 10:29 PM

3. Thanks Kath1~

I haven't talked to you in a while. Are you still going to the Washington rally? The one I sadly will miss?

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Response to sheshe2 (Reply #3)

Fri Aug 29, 2014, 10:43 PM

4. Yes!

And the very cool thing is that I have some 20-something co-workers planning to attend as well! I'm hoping for a big crowd!

"We will not wait another 200 years for equality; we demand equal protection under the law. Ratify the Equal Rights Amendment (ERA)
• If you don’t support our rights, we will not support your candidacy.
• We demand DEEDS not WORDS, and we VOTE– if we elect you and you don’t take action in support of equality, we will vote you OUT."


Always a joy to hear from you, she. Peace....

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Response to Kath1 (Reply #4)

Fri Aug 29, 2014, 10:50 PM

6. I want to see pictures!

I will be with you in spirit Kath!

Solidarity!



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Response to sheshe2 (Reply #6)

Fri Aug 29, 2014, 11:13 PM

7. I know you'll be with us in spirit, she!

For my younger co-workers, this will be their first experience in a demonstration or rally. Because of that, I hope it is energetic and inspiring. Some of my friends will be attending with me. My daughter and some of her friends will be there as well.

Sisterhood and solidarity are powerful things!

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Response to Kath1 (Reply #7)

Fri Aug 29, 2014, 11:30 PM

8. I love you Kath!

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Response to sheshe2 (Original post)

Fri Aug 29, 2014, 10:45 PM

5. k&r...

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Response to sheshe2 (Original post)

Fri Aug 29, 2014, 11:56 PM

9. Good post, sheshe2. It's long past time for domestic violence to end.

 

I hope you're doing well.....

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Response to sheshe2 (Original post)

Fri Aug 29, 2014, 11:57 PM

10. Thanks for your post, sheshe2.

I remember the days when the police would do nothing...because they "didn't see you get hurt" ....a little has changed... we can't go quietly anymore.

Love, Peace and the Righteous Fight!
~ littlemissmartypants

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Response to littlemissmartypants (Reply #10)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 09:19 PM

49. Hey, lmsp.

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Response to sheshe2 (Original post)

Fri Aug 29, 2014, 11:58 PM

11. A powerful post, sheshe. nt

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Response to sheshe2 (Original post)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 12:21 AM

12. Forgot one...

 



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Response to Spitfire of ATJ (Reply #12)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 12:29 AM

13. Thank you Spitfire.

I love Patrick Stewart's voice.

At the launch event, Stewart pounded the podium in front of him nine times to symbolize the shocking statistic that "every nine seconds a woman is assaulted or beaten in the United States" (another alarming statistic: according to the UN, globally at least one in three women and girls is beaten or sexually abused in her lifetime.) For Stewart the cause is intensely personal, since as he talks about openly in the following interview, he experienced the horror of domestic violence firsthand when as a small child he witnessed his father repeatedly physically abusing his mother. Stewart said he only recently felt ready to talk publicly about his experience - but now feels it is important that he do so, since, as he said, "domestic violence is protected by silence." Stewart has been a longtime, committed advocate on this issue, working on behalf of the organization Refuge, which provides a range of services to abused women and children in the UK, as well as on behalf of Amnesty International's Violence Against Women Campaign. Stewart passionately believes that violence against women is not a women's issue, but "humanity's issue". With recent stories of extreme acts of violence in the news, such as the horrific gang rape of the student on a bus in Delhi, India (a Swiss tourist was also gang raped there this past weekend) and the high profile case of the rape of a 16 year-old girl by football players in Steubenville, Ohio, the problem of violence against women is very much in public consciousness - now, says Stewart, for real change to happen, men must be a part of the solution.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/marianne-schnall/exclusive-interview-with-_11_b_2900041.html

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Response to sheshe2 (Original post)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 01:43 AM

14. I suffered from emotional and verbal abuse.

I was never hit. But why did I put up with it? Because nobody told me I didn't have to put up with negative, critical, control freak men.
My parents wanted me to be a doormat.

Not to take away from the survivors of physical abuse. But emotional and mental abuse can make you question your sanity.

He literally almost killed me with words. It was all completely unnecessary. Some people don't understand nice, and do not start from the default position of respect. I was told I had to "earn" his respect. What bullshit.

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Response to Manifestor_of_Light (Reply #14)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 01:56 AM

16. Manifestor_of_Light,

Your story in no way takes away from those that suffered physical abuse. Verbal and emotional abuse are just as crippling. Degrade Humiliate and abuse a person, a human being with words. I went through that too and yes physical abuse.

Abuse in any form is wrong. It is wrong and I am so sorry that you went through that.

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Response to sheshe2 (Reply #16)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 09:30 PM

51. Thank you so much, sheshe2.

I got it from two different husbands. Different styles but both verbally and emotionally abusive.

The first one has since turned his life around and become a good person. I saw him for the first time in 25 years at the memorial service for his brother. When I talked to him, I felt two invisible hands open my ribcage and a whole lot of pain flew out of my heart chakra. It was an extraordinary experience. I think it really eased my mind a lot to know that he had changed radically. He's probably the only person I've ever met that has changed radically and for the better.

The second one is a narcissist who thinks he knows everything and I hold out no hope for him.

When I was almost 40 I met my soulmate at a Unitarian Church. I wasn't sure there was such a thing, but I found him and he found me.

He'd been verbally abused and the second wife had tried to hit him. Men get abused too and some people don't want to believe that.

And we value each other!! Such a simple concept.

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Response to Manifestor_of_Light (Reply #14)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 12:20 PM

19. It doesn't take away from the subject of physical abuse at all...

 

...it's usually part of it ie: where and how it begins - verbal and emotional abuse often (though not always) escalates to physical. Even if or when it doesn't, it's VERY damaging. I put up with it for years in various relationships. Why? Maybe self-esteem - and maybe that was from growing up in an abusive home where my mom was battered and abused. Abuse destroys families. Not just the adults involved but the kids too - it destroys them emotionally. They blame themselves, and grow up not even knowing what a normal, loving relationship looks like. It's a serious problem for all involved. And whether it's physical or emotional and verbal (and financial, usually), it's seriously damaging.

One of the *best* books I've ever read about verbal abuse is Patricia Evans' "Verbal Abuse: How to Recognize it and How to Respond". It's a MUST-READ for those who are suffering verbal/emotional abuse and who need clarity about what they're experiencing. Because it's so damn invisible since it's not physical. No one will tell you what it is. You just know you are not happy, are constantly being hurt, not being respected and are being convinced that it's "all your fault" and that you're "too sensitive". I've seen (and been) independent women, CEOs even, being convinced by their abusive others that they are inept, stupid, and can't do anything right. Even the laundry. Nothing. Their spirits are broken, and they blame themselves - because that's who the abusers tell them is at fault. Since they're not being physically battered, they figure it must be their fault and/or they're "too sensitive". Not so though. Far from it.

Abuse is abuse. Physical, emotional/verbal or financial. It's abuse. Learning to recognize it is hard for some and maybe even most people. That's why I got the book. And I called it what it was. He didn't like it. Tough. It's abuse.



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Response to Triana (Reply #19)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 05:46 PM

23. Triana, thank you so much for

Patricia Evans videos. Her book is a must read for those that need to understand verbal abuse.

I dated my ex for a long time before I married. Happy to say I walked away after 3 years and never looked back.

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Response to sheshe2 (Reply #23)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 07:41 PM

39. This is another great site that helps the abused to understand ...

 

... the two-faced nature of abusers, that VA and EA IS abuse and that contrary to what your abuser probably tells you, you are NOT "crazy":

http://www.youarenotcrazy.com

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Response to Manifestor_of_Light (Reply #14)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 09:49 PM

52. Verbal and mental abuse is abuse.

Just as violent as physical; you, too, survived, and I'm grateful for that! People are becoming aware that verbal and mental abuse hurt just as much as a fist in the face, thank the gods and goddesses everywhere.

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Response to sheshe2 (Original post)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 01:49 AM

15. Kick, kick, kick!!!

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Response to sheshe2 (Original post)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 02:36 AM

17. I AM WOMAN

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Response to sheshe2 (Reply #17)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 06:51 PM

30. Very nice, sheshe.

The words that scrolled at the end are especially effective. Helen's song changed a lot of lives, back in the day, and continues to do so. I watched a TV segment about her recently, which included her visit with a group of young women (middle schoolers I think) and she was amazed to hear them sing all the words by heart. Her message still resonates. Yes!

Blessings.

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Response to classof56 (Reply #30)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 07:26 PM

35. Yes it did classof56...

and we are all stronger because of it. We are Invincible. We are Woman.

Brava to Helen and to the children and women she taught.

You sweetie are a touch of class.

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Response to sheshe2 (Original post)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 09:08 AM

18. k&r for exposure. n/t

-Laelth

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Response to sheshe2 (Original post)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 02:44 PM

20. Your best OP yet -

my thank you on this one is personal. As it is for so many.

K&R

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Response to TBF (Reply #20)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 05:47 PM

24. TBF

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Response to sheshe2 (Original post)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 04:38 PM

21. ...

.....


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Response to sheshe2 (Original post)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 05:31 PM

22. Trigger warning for the choir?

 

I'd bet a nickel we all totally agree with the sentiment.

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Response to Android3.14 (Reply #22)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 05:59 PM

25. Yep...that pretty much sums it up. I don't know any men that abuse their wives. (I hope not)

 

At least they have never shown any of the signs and their families seems happy. I DO donate to a battered woman shelter.
That's about all I can do. I wish it were more.

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Response to BlueJazz (Reply #25)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 06:04 PM

26. I have an in-law that batters

 

I advised my brother-in-law's wife to make as safe an exit as possible, but they just stayed together and my wife's family (self-proclaimed feminists) just kept fooling themselves that they (husband and victim) can change things, and it is better to stay together for the kids.

Totally dreadful.

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Response to Android3.14 (Reply #26)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 06:11 PM

27. From my limited knowledge on family abuse, it seldom gets better...usually worse.

 

Plus, staying together for the kids is (I think) a terrible way to deal with the problem.
Must be hard to deal with those issues in your family.

I consider myself very lucky.

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Response to Android3.14 (Reply #22)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 07:05 PM

33. Probaby a warning to those who have experienced this abuse.

The first sentence is enough to make my blood run cold.

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Response to sheshe2 (Original post)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 06:29 PM

28. Holy Cow, you warned me!

That first photo.

Will be taking a sleeper tonight.

It IS that bad people (those of you who would poo poo the lasting effects of this kind of abuse). I am 60 years old, suffered every kind of abuse out there, I do still trigger but it comes under a semi control fairly quickly now.....until the lights are off and I am alone.

sheshe2, as hard as it is this is most important. Thank you.

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Response to MuseRider (Reply #28)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 06:40 PM

29. MuseRider

You are right it is hard, yet must be said. Sadly it needs to be repeated over and over. Abuse, all kinds will stay with you one way or another for life.

Peace to you~

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Response to sheshe2 (Reply #29)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 08:18 PM

42. And peace to you as well.

I agree and will take the triggers along with all the rest of it to get the word out so hopefully fewer people have to deal with it.

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Response to sheshe2 (Original post)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 06:52 PM

31. I am with you

 

my sister and I grew up in an physically and emotionally violent environment. She died at the hands of an abusive husband and after two failed marriages I called it quits. I'd rather be alone. I do understand and rage against abuse of any kind. Peace to you and a for a very powerful post that brings sadness, yet there is hope the world, especially abusive people will learn one day about true love.

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Response to heaven05 (Reply #31)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 07:12 PM

34. Oh my sweet heaven...

In the memory of your sister. May she be in peace.

Love and Happiness~ to you and yours.

thank you

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Response to sheshe2 (Original post)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 07:01 PM

32. Superlative OP, thanks.

Keeping forever.

While it might cause me a little karmic discomfort some day, I'd gladly pay the freight to dance on Pig Boy's grave. Him and all like him.

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Response to IrishAyes (Reply #32)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 09:17 PM

47. Thank you my dear Irish.

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Response to sheshe2 (Original post)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 07:30 PM

36. DAYUM, girlfriend.

That is an absolutely riveting photo essay. Pictures speaking hundreds of thousands of words. THANK YOU for this compilation! A true Think Piece, in every sense of the word.

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Response to calimary (Reply #36)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 08:42 PM

44. I'm angry, calimary.

About so many things right now. I want justice for all of us. Yes the pictures speak a thousand words. And they tell all our stories in words we may not be able to say out loud.

You my friend are welcome.

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Response to sheshe2 (Original post)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 07:33 PM

37. and never forget ...






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Response to napkinz (Reply #37)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 08:33 PM

43. They are the ugliest sorriest excuses for men that I have ever seen.

May they all rot in hell for not standing for one woman or child in their family. They betrayed them and they betrayed us all. If they believe that not one woman or child suffered in there family history, then the are Deaf Dumb and Blind!

Just look at their smiling faces. That was a slap in the face to all women and that makes them all abusers!

Dammit to hell, napkinz!

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Response to sheshe2 (Original post)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 07:40 PM

38. is this man, to use his own words about Hillary, "precluded from ever being president"?






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Response to sheshe2 (Original post)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 07:42 PM

40. I just Tweeted this, btw.

 

The message needs to be spread as far and wide as possible. Who will join me?

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Response to AverageJoe90 (Reply #40)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 07:46 PM

41. Thank you Joe. eom

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Response to sheshe2 (Original post)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 09:07 PM

45. Crying.

Been there. Heart hurts. Powerful, powerful, powerful post, sheshe.

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Response to raven mad (Reply #45)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 09:15 PM

46. The point is, you Were there.

The crying is healing now, Raven.

Your avatar...



Bear hugs to you.

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Response to sheshe2 (Reply #46)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 09:18 PM

48. I survived it.

I mostly cry for those going through it without a support system to help them get the hell OUT. I was lucky enough to have that, and for the last 24 years have been mostly a happy, happy woman.

Thank you for hugs - they are certainly reciprocated!

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Response to raven mad (Reply #48)

Sat Aug 30, 2014, 09:21 PM

50. I did too, raven mad.

I survived it.

Hugs are healing too~

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