update on my husband.
the tumor on my husband's brain has gotten very big. last week he lost his memory and has trouble communicating. can't find the words. he was admitted into hospice this afternoon. the doctor said he will probably live for a few weeks.
again i'm asking for thoughts and prayers. we've been together 41 years. i can't imagine life without him.
= new reply since forum marked as read
and we ALL do.....when I've had to walk through dark tunnels like this, it helps me when I remember that it is a part of life.... You're not alone, everyone must go through times like this.
Many many hugs to you and sending prayers for your courage, comfort and support, and also for your dear husband.
Please seek out friends and family and surround yourself, lean on them, ask for their company.
nam myoho renge kyo
nam myoho renge kyo
nam myoho renge kyo
Life and Death
(From an essay series by Daisaku Ikeda first published in the Philippine magazine Mirror, in 1998)
Death is something no one can escape from. It follows life as surely as night follows day, winter follows autumn or old age follows youth. People make preparations so that they won't suffer when winter comes. They prepare so they won't have to suffer in their old age. Yet how few people prepare for the even greater certainty of death!
<snip>
Buddhism views the idea that our lives end with death as a serious delusion. It sees everything in the universe, everything that happens, as part of a vast living web of interconnection. The vibrant energy we call life which flows throughout the universe has no beginning and no end. Life is a continuous, dynamic process of change. Why then should human life be the one exception? Why should our existence be an arbitrary, one-shot deal, disconnected from the universal rhythms of life?
<snip>
Death should therefore be appreciated, like life, as a blessing. Buddhism views death as a period of rest, like sleep, by which life regains energy and prepares for new cycles of living. Thus there is no reason to fear death, to hate or seek to banish it from our minds.
<of her husband who was facing death in his sixties, Mary Norton said that,> "... her husband had faced death without fear, regarding it as "another adventure; the same kind of test as facing a forest fire."
"I guess the first thing about such an adventure," Mary said, "is that it's an opportunity to challenge yourself. It's getting yourself out of situations that are comfortable, where you know what goes, and where you don't have to worry. It's an opportunity to grow. It's a chance to become what you need to be. But it's one that you must face without fear."
my thoughts and prayers are certainly with you and your husband.
I am praying for you both. May your time together be filled with love and peace.
My prayers and thoughts are streaming towards you both...
This is horrifying. My heart goes out to you in this time of loss...
I hope he is pain-free and aware of how much you love him.
I'm praying for your husband, for you, and for your family...
I'm so sorry to read your post.
41 years is a very long time... but I know it's not nearly long enough.
I hope you have friends and family nearby to help you.
how you and he are doing through all this.
you through this and help you be there for him.
I am so sorry for you both. Thank you for letting us know. You're in our hearts.
A lovely message...
I can't even imagine what you're going through. I'll be thinking of you and your dear husband.
sorry for what you two are having to go through. May he not suffer and strength and love to you 
Sending good vibes
I don't know what to say. I'm sure I'll be one of many here who will
be keeping you in our hearts.
thoughts, prayers, candles and light.
It's hard to think of the right words to say at moments like these. Please know that your husband, you, & your family are in our hearts & thoughts here in DU. We care.
It was so touching and comforting that it really did help. And I think I only knew three or four of these people personally - how SO many reached out to me! It meant a LOT. Let it help buoy you up at a time like this when you really need it.
warm thoughts for each of you
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family
I will light a candle for him tonight. Holding you both in my thoughts.
You and your husband are in my thoughts and prayers.
Love him, be there, be strong and grateful for the time you had, and every day yet to come.
I'll think of you a lot.
I know your pain.
Sending prayers and thoughts for you and your husband.
...
Peace and strength to you all.
really wants to know about, but they are incredible when you need them...
Cancer sucks. I know. I wish you did not...
I wish for you strength for the next difficult days
I really don't know what to say. I can't imagine what he and you are going through. I just hope that his remaining time is filled with love and as much laughter as possible. In some respects you and your family are lucky to have a chance to say goodbye. I never did when my dad died unexpectedly of a heart attack.
My thoughts and prayers are with both of you and your family.
God Bless!!!
Life can be so unfair, and I'm sorry you are going through this. I had my first experience with hospice last July when my mother passed away. I was advised to get plenty of rest myself which did help a lot. If it is any comfort at all to you, hospice workers really know what to do and your beloved husband is in good hands with them as well as you.
You and your family are in many folks' thoughts and prayers, mine included.
I wish there were more I could say but I think you can see from this thread how many people will be thinking of you and how many will be with you in spirit through this impossible time.
I'm praying for you and him both.
I wish you the best in this difficult time. I don't know what else to say but that DU is with you, heart and soul. Love is the only thing we can offer. I am not religious but I pray that it helps.
I can't imagine life without my husband, either. There are just no words to express how sorry I am that you are going through this. well. God bless you and may He hold your hand as you go through the toughest trial most people will ever experience. God bless you and you husband as I cannot imagine what it would be like to lose my husband and We've only been married a bit over 10 years. Sincere love and sympathy from California.
I only hope that you can enjoy your last minutes together.......
You have my prayers.
Here's a hug from Ohio.
I cannot imagine it either. I'll be thinking of you both.
My thoughts and prayers are with you and may God help you in these trying times.
Both of you are in my thoughts and prayers.
I'm so sorry.....Prayers and hugs so tight. Words just don't do it. I'm so sorry.
Bless you both.
Your DU family shares your pain.
You'll be in my thoughts and prayers.--{{{ }}}
Words can be so inadequate. I'm terribly sorry for all he's going through and for you, this must be unimaginably difficult.
My heart goes out to you both.
aA
kesha
At this difficult time, please try to take care of your health as much as possible. It's so easy to get physically and well as emotionally run down during this very stressful and sad time in your life.
I'm very sorry.
to help you and your family through this most difficult time.
and peace for you and your family as you all face these coming weeks.
All my sympathies to you, Desert Flower...I can sense the fear and grief you must be feeling but I could never imagine actually having to go thru such an ordeal. Hugs to you.
He has had Type I Diabetes for 53 years and his system is shutting down. He has vascular dementia and I think that is almost harder to deal with than the foot amputation, hardened arteries, and kidney trouble. He's been in the hospital with pneumonia and complications since March 13 and was in ICU for 2 weeks. He is unable to swallow food so they are having a hard time regulating his blood sugar. His oxygen levels are too low, so they performed a trachiotomy because he was too unstable to be put on a ventilator. He's been hospitalized many times in our 28 years of marriage and he's always bounced back. This feels different and I'm scared.
If you want to talk to someone who knows something of what you're going through, please don't hesitate to e-mail me.
Take care,
Diane
Anishinaabe in MI & mom to Leo, Sophie, Taz & Nigel, members of Dogs Against Romney, Cat Division
"We ride inside--HISS!”
sending good vibes your way, don't forget to take care of yourself, too.
that we could do or say to make it all go away.
Because we would if we could.
Thoughts and prayers, and hugs for both of you.
So sorry for your hurt.
I don't know what to say But you both will be on my thoughts.
for you... been there
Peace...
I remember my Dad when the cancer spread to his brain. He just wasn't the same guy then.
I am so sorry for what your husband and you are going through.
Hold him as long as you can, and hold tight to all you know.
Even if he cannot speak, cannot remember, keep telling him your shared memories for the love and lifetime together.
There are no just right words, so just know you are being sent spirit and light from this southwest DU'er.
Just hold tight
Thank goodness for hospice: they'll help both of you through this. I can't even begin to imagine your pain. Light and healing to you.
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My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.