Post your Ebola symptoms.

[Barack_America]

Mine: itchy eyes, runny nose and sneezing.

Yours?

[Mz Pip]

1. Lots of sneezing

The cats are shedding.

[Barack_America]

4. Apparently household pets carry Ebola.

Ask Spain. Shedding is a well known sign of Ebola.

[Politicalboi]

14. OMG!

My cat is sneezing, and I'm now shedding. Now I'm going to get my ebowla filled with pot. Pot cures everything. And I'm going to use the ebolo paddle on my cat.

<a href="http://imgur.com/JqqtGCe"><img src="" title="Hosted by imgur.com"/></a>

[madokie]

2. When I was weedeating the yard a few days ago I was hit in the eye

by something that I thought flew off the weedeater line but now I'm not so sure it wasn't ebola that hit me in the eye. If it would have been a piece of dirt or something like that it would have already come out but this ebola thing is still in there and its bugging me to no end. HELP!

[pinboy3niner]

8. Better follow up to be sure you're not affected by Ebola's nasty cousin--E. Boli

[pipi_k]

19. Actually it could have been

an owl bolus.


Little piece of puked up mouse maybe.

[pinboy3niner]

23. I thought owl bolusks were only used for monuments and graves. nt

[Aerows]

73. You are better than this

than to participate in this thread, PB39er.

It shocks and saddens me that you make light of this.

[pinboy3niner]

78. I see this thread as mocking the hysteria

I still love you, even though we may disagree here.

[Aerows]

151. I'm terrified for people in my immediate family

that work in health care. I flew off of the handle, and I apologize for doing so.

[Voice for Peace]

89. I've been finding people everywhere making light of their own fears this way.

Not making light of the plague, but making light of their own fears.
Good therapy.

[pipi_k]

122. yep, and

I think anyone who doesn't have anxieties over things like plagues, diseases, germs, etc., doesn't really understand that often, making fun of the whole thing is a way to connect with reality.

Not every headache is a brain tumor.

Not every muscle spasm is ALS.

Not every brainfart is Alzheimers or dementia.

And not every sneeze is Ebola.

[Luminous Animal]

3. Hiding remarkably insensitive posts.

[brooklynite]

135. Seroiusly, is this the best you can do?

I'm sure there are some people with cancer symptoms you could make fun of.

[notrightatall]

5. Shit. I have those, too!

[onehandle]

6. Desiring gun ownership

Pretty sure I can shoot the disease away. See: Homer Simpson

[cwydro]

7. Hot flashes.

Irritability toward those who don't realize humor is a source of strength in humans.

[Barack_America]

15. .

Seriously, I think we can all use a step back from the edge. Thank you.

I had a cold over the weekend. There was a mild fever. I flew through Dallas in late September. There was a moment when my mind started to wander...and then I laughed at myself, and checked in on how Liberia and Sierra Leone were doing, hoping it was showing some glimmer of improvement over there where people are actually suffering.

[cwydro]

24. My 88 year old mom just flew back from Europe.

She was in three countries. She hasn't even thought to panic like some I've read here on DU.

I enjoyed your OP.

[spinbaby]

117. OMG,

I flew in September, too! I could have caught Ebola!1!1!1

[Horse with no Name]

9. I have this mole...

want to see it??

[Autumn]

82. Are you sure it's a mole? Voles are much cuter.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vole

[Downwinder]

10. Dizzy, unsteady on my feet. Feel like I'm drunk.

Maybe I am drunk.

[cwydro]

26. This one made me giggle.

I may need a glass of wine.

[herding cats]

41. Have you been to West Africa in the past 21 days?

Never mind that, have you been to Dallas, Texas in the past 21 days?

Are you drinking now?

If your answer is yes to any of the above questions, CNN says call them! They want to hear your story and there's a better than 50 percent chance you'll get to be on the air there. FOX will give you a better than 95 percent chance if you promise to blame Obama for your symptoms. You're gonna be famous!

[alittlelark]

48. ^^^^ DUZY^^^^^

[herding cats]

66. .

Thank you.

[Downwinder]

58. Gin and tonic is supposed to be good for Malaria.

How about Don Julio anejo for Ebola.

[Barack_America]

61. I'm willing to try it.

As many doses as it takes.

ETA: it's the quinine in the tonic that does it for malaria...*end nerd*

[Downwinder]

63. Good for what ails you.

I think I'm cured.

[herding cats]

65. It's worth clinical study.

I, for one, am willing to sign up and give it a try. All things considered, I think it may be the proper prescription for our current malady.

[hedgehog]

101. I have relatives in Houston - should I be worried?

[Barack_America]

102. Have you emailed them? If so, what connection do you have?

It started off dial-up and then went DSL. There's been talk about it going cable, but there's no real evidence of this yet. Obviously avoid any and all attachments.

[pinboy3niner]

103. My God, I hope they use a proxy!!!

[Arugula Latte]

143. Well, I live in the United States, which is where Houston is located!

I am going to go cover myself from head to toe in Saran Wrap.

[madinmaryland]

11. Erectile disfunction.

Oops. Did I just say that?

[NuclearDem]

119. Well, Ebola only strikes when the moment's right.

[cherokeeprogressive]

12. Projectile vomiting like a 105mm Howitzer.

Anyone within 7 miles is at risk.

[LeftyMom]

38. You just need to stop thinking about the Dodgers' postseason.

[pinboy3niner]

49. It's a cannondrum

You arty get that checked, just in case. Hope you shell be better soon.

[cherokeeprogressive]

93. Damn. LeftyMom nailed it. It wasn't Ebola; it was Welosta. Dry heaves now. Besides...

I couldn't one-up your post if I had a week to try.

I gotta say though... as a young boy who saw three Uncles go away and two come back (One who left us twelve years ago, One who left us last Christmas season, and one who simply never came back emotionally); that damned ribbon evokes emotions in me that are at the same time proud and so profoundly sad that sometimes it leaves me at a loss for any kind of intelligent response whatsoever.

Respect. Me. You.

[msanthrope]

132. You've been unjustly accused of misfire on this thread. Some have recoiled, but I think keeping

your powder dry is a waste of your verbal gerbil launcher.

[Xipe Totec]

13. InContinents nt

[5X]

18. I'm in the oklahoma continent, am I at risk? n/t

[Xipe Totec]

20. You are now, since they didn't keep it in continents of Africa. nt

[pipi_k]

16. Watery

swollen eyes, sneezing, mental confusion, and excess flatulence.

[cwydro]

30. Um, that would be normal

for me.

Well, maybe not the flatulence. But all the rest.

[pipi_k]

125. You should try it sometime

The flatulence, I mean.

There's nothing quite as thrilling as never knowing when your back end will sound like a bull moose during mating season...

[alcibiades_mystery]

17. I got the nighttime snifflin', sneezin', yes, stuffy head, coughin' achin', fever, so you can rest

type rhymes...

Them Das Efx...

[Beaverhausen]

21. I had a headache

Oh I took Advil and it went away.

[BlueJazz]

22. I have this terrible, insane desire to go..>

[pipi_k]

126. OMG!!!!1111

Make your Will out now, before it's too late!!!

[Voice for Peace]

147. Has ebowling been invented yet?

why, yes it has! http://www.gamesgames.com/game/bowling-mania

[herding cats]

25. My back hurts and so does my tummy.

Which I had thought to be because I over did it at work today and put too much Tabasco in my gumbo tonight, respectively. I'm probably infecting all of DU right now. Thanks Obama!

[MissB]

27. Fever, abdominal pain.

[Douglas Carpenter]

28. I have dirty thoughts about doing unnatural acts

[Strelnikov_]

29. Headache, diarrhea, nausea, abdominal pain . . .

Gotta be Ebola . . . or a Budweiser hangover.

[uppityperson]

32. headache, stuffy head, stomach ache

Great thread, by the way.

[jeff47]

33. My hair's on fire and I keep running around in circles screaming

"WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!!! THIS IS THE END OF MANKIND!!! IT'S THE ISIS OF DISEASES!!!"

[AwakeAtLast]

34. I sneezed about a week ago

followed by a small cough. Just one.

[BeyondGeography]

35. A seemingly irreversible aversion to work

I think it's terminal.

[BeyondGeography]

81. To quote the great Tug McGraw

Ya gotta believe!

[BeyondGeography]

90. LMAO!

That's what you need coming out of the pen right there. Where did all our lefty screwballers go?

[babylonsister]

67. Amen! It's catching! nt

[Taitertots]

152. Oh crap. Everyone in my office has Ebola

Good thing long paid vacations is the cure.

[Brigid]

36. Occasional coughing.

Doc says it's caused by one of the meds I take, but how do I know he's telling me the truth?

[LeftyMom]

39. I've been bleeding for days, my back hurts, and I keep thinking about stabbing people.

Pretty sure that's Ebola.

[herding cats]

43. Well played.

Hats off. You win the thread!

[pinboy3niner]

52. I don't think that's what they mean by 'stabbing pain'

[Marrah_G]

94. Best answer evah!!!!!!

[Dreamer Tatum]

42. Itchy rectum and smelly finger. nt

[noiretextatique]

45. is this supposed to be a joke?

this is crass and tasteless. is wrong with DU? CHILL...sure, let's just chill, while people are dying. good, clean american fun

[Barack_America]

50. See post 15.

I think Americans need to get off their fainting couches, worrying about themselves, and their "risk" and remember what is going on in West Africa (which, you know, has been pretty much wiped from the headlines since ONE case showed up here).

To put it bluntly, our ass is showing.

[Spazito]

71. +1 n/t

[cwydro]

57. Get a grip. nt

[noiretextatique]

160. get a soul nt

[Marrah_G]

95. it's called humor, relax and smile a little, the world is not ending.

[noiretextatique]

161. it is not funny. eom

[Marrah_G]

162. I get that you don't find it funny

Other people do.

[noiretextatique]

163. i get that other people do...i do not eom

[alittlelark]

46. Had some wine tonight...... I have ALL of them !!!

Plus 'odd paranoia', imminent feelings of DOOM, ....and forgetfulness

[pinboy3niner]

55. Life is a cabernet, my friend

[NuclearDem]

51. Had it for about a week. Cured it, though.

Turns out NyQuil really is the nighttime sniffling, sneezing, bleeding, shitting, puking, best sleep you ever got with ebola medicine.

[Ilsa]

53. Yes, i have a frothy mixture of lube and fecal matter

coming out of my... oh shit! I have a Santorum! Oh the huge manatee!

[ErikJ]

54. Tourettes

cant stop swearing about how the GOP has denied ACA for 25% of the people in their states.

[XemaSab]

56. Itchy nose

Loose stools.

Mild stomachache.

Muscle soreness.

Am I gonna die?

[pinboy3niner]

60. This question sound like a job for the Magic 8-Ball

Oh...nevermind. You don't wanna know.

But for God's sake at least organize those stools around the kitchen table. You're not dead yet and we don't have a housekeeper, you know!

[Feral Child]

106. Absolutely!

You're doomed.



Probably not anytime soon, though.

[CaptainTruth]

59. A repeated need for food, at regular intervals.

And refreshing beverages. Some other minor ones too, like cranial implosion, rectal lava flow, & subatomic disintegration.

Plus, every time I come in contact with antimatter there is a large explosion.

[MoonchildCA]

62. Do I now have to be quarantined...

...after reading this thread?

[kestrel91316]

64. Go ask the families of the dead in Africa.

[Barack_America]

68. I can't because of the travel bans and quarantines you keep demanding...

...for those people you "wouldn't put it past" to all carry MDR TB as well.

No, I haven't forgotten that post.

[Aerows]

72. Or the people that have to work

their asses off.

The insensitivity shocks me. They act like even people down to the ones carting out the medical waste aren't scared to death.

[Voice for Peace]

148. why insensitivity? Do you think the people in this thread, who are making fun of their own fears,

don't know or care what is happening in real time with Ebola?

There is a fine line between being informed and being afraid.
Everyone keeps toppling over into fear. Don't judge the people
here as if you are superior to us, when it comes to having a
conscience.

[Aerows]

149. I'm not superior

Just scared. Many in my family work in health care, several in labs, and it frightens me.

Sorry if I came off as an ass. Concern and worry does that to people, even me. I'm usually pretty level-headed.

[Voice for Peace]

157. It is scary. But I don't think we ought to let ourselves be scared.

I was looking at photos and videos, articles about the
thousands of healthcare workers volunteering over there,
coming from around the world, doctors, nurses, so many
working hard and risking their lives. It was/is astonishing
and inspiring to see this massing of humanity.

I have a daughter who's been in Africa for a few months.
Not in the afflicted countries, as far as I know, but not
sure with whom she's come into contact. Yet I know
Africa is HUGE and the odds are so tiny. I keep thinking of
folks in Dallas, how scared they must be, every little symptom
of anything. Thank you for your response by the way, much
appreciated.

[Feral Child]

115. kestrel, you're better than this.

We've never conversed, but I read your posts when I see them because you're smart and knowledgeable.

I think everyone in this thread is heart-wrung about the situation in Africa, we're just all a little peeved about the countless threads and endless traffic about their personal fear.

Calling for quarantines, suggesting IS might smuggle in Ebola. They are self-absorbed, cry-baby demands for attention.

I saw a pandering thread yesterday expressing fear of "weaponized Ebola".

Internet Munchausen-by-Proxy is so desperate.


There are many frightful, actually dangerous things going on in America we could talk about here. Things we might actually be able to reach a consensus on, if we weren't wasting bandwidth one-upping each other on how much more scared we are than that other poster. It's embarrassing.

[RufusTFirefly]

69. I feel as though I have an animated hammer inside my brain

Miraculously, a couple of Anacin seem to have fixed things for me.

[Rhiannon12866]

97. I remember that one!

"Control yourself! Sure you have a headache, you're tense, irritable. But don't take it out on her!" Good advice, thanks for the reminder.

[pipi_k]

131. Last week

I wanted to do it myself

[RufusTFirefly]

141. "I'd rather do it myself!!"

I'd forgotten that immortal line!
We used to joke about that one in my household.

Thanks for the reminder!

[pipi_k]

144. Did you know

that someone actually turned that line into a song?

[RufusTFirefly]

146. Haha! No!!

Destined to be an instant classic in the Firefly house!
Thanks!

[Aerows]

70. This post contains so much

assholery, that I would get banned if I expressed how sorry, insensitive, and shitty the statements in it are.

Are you trying to get people that are decent human beings to make posts that get hides?

It's a horrible way to die, and thousands are dying from it. Health care workers that care are scared as hell they might get it and bring it home to their families.

Shame on you doesn't even begin to express my thoughts.

[Barack_America]

79. Oh yes, there has been much concern on DU for West Africans.

"Quarantine them!" "Travel bans!" "Why expose our troops?"

Real heartfelt concern.

This OP is a blatant attempt to mock those more concerned with the one case of Ebola in the US, than the thousands in West Africa. I make no apologies for that.

[Feral Child]

111. Get a grip.

We're all concerned for the people suffering in Africa. We're just tired of all the whiny, self-absorbed, scaredy-cat bullshit posts about the calamity.

The likelihood of a major outbreak in the US is minuscule, but some folks are just all into the drama. It got old a week ago.

[Aerows]

153. It's "whiny bullshit"

until you have direct family members working in health care. I over-reacted, I'll admit, but that doesn't change the fact that I am concerned for family members.

[Feral Child]

159. Best of luck to your care-givers. Seriously.

I wouldn't sweat it unless they're working in Africa.

Or at least in quarantine services. Maybe ER.


If they're stateside, their odds of contact are probably much the same as winning the lottery.

[betsuni]

74. I'm troubled by strange noises in the middle of the night

and experiencing feelings of dread in my basement.

[Autumn]

75. Had a fever so went to town so I could buy some over the counter medicine just

to be on the safe side. Turns out there isn't any over the counter medicine so I did some shopping, ate lunch at Olive Garden with a pit bull that was flown in from Dallas, went to the liquor store, stopped at a couple of malls and coughed around a lot and I got tired so I came home and quarantined myself just to be on the safe side.

[Barack_America]

83. But at any point did you breastfeed?

That is crucial here. Still, for the good of humanity, you must quarantine yourself for the full 21 days...or at least until you get bored or run out of toilet paper. We have to be reasonable here.

[Autumn]

84. The pit bull wasn't hungry, but I did offer

Can't do the 21 but I could do maybe 3, then I get a little bored and need to get out. 3 days a week for the next 7 weeks should work just as well.

[Jamastiene]

76. When I last cut my toenails, I could not get that little sharp edge in the corner.

It is now brushing across my sheets at night and waking me up repeatedly. I think I may be feverish. It simply MUST be the Ebola.

[zappaman]

77. My pee smells and I pooped green.

And my feet hurt.

[pinboy3niner]

80. Lay off the asparagus

The feet thing I'm afraid I can't help you with. That's definitely terminal.

[msanthrope]

138. This reminds me of the time I had a asparagus and beet salad.....

smelly, red-tinged pee?

My doctor hurt himself laughing.

[pipi_k]

145. Asparagus is so fickle

Some people have stinky pee from it and can't smell it.

Some people don't get asparagus stink at all.



Never had the beet pee, but I did get pretty pink poo once.


And, getting back to the smelly pee, my main stinkfests come from

asparagus, cabbage, Chinese food, seafood, and chicken.


Someday I'm going to scarf down all of those at once just to see what happens.

[C Moon]

85. Great post!

[Fred Friendlier]

86. I have this rash on my elbow

which I mention only because I was in Africa for a couple months in '98, with a return trip a decade later.

Should I be frightened?

[Voice for Peace]

87. Pretty mild, but I think I've only got just a touch of ebola

Feeling a little sleepy and hungry

[rocktivity]

91. Being a dark-skinned African-American.

At least I can still sit where I like on the bus.


rocktivity

[crim son]

92. Mine are EXACTLY the same as yours except

I also have a sore throat and an unwillingness to tidy the kitchen. FML. How long do you think I have left?

[pinboy3niner]

99. Don't worry, you'll recover from your physical ailments just fine

But when that shit piles up in the kitchen and you can't open the fridge, you're a goner.

[davidpdx]

98. I have a headache

Does that qualify?

[Barack_America]

100. The most fatal.

I'm sorry to say, but your brain has probably liquified. Did you possibly watch any Fox News Ebola coverage? Even inadvertently? They've been seeing this a lot with the Ebola Ailes strain, which has a 110% mortality rate and a 1% survival rate.

[pinboy3niner]

104. Did NOBODY pay attention to plop plop fizz fizz oh what a relief it is?

They could have been SAVED!

[Feral Child]

105. Ennui, lethargy,

excessive yawning, general malaise.

[pinboy3niner]

107. OMG, did you say malaise?

Next thing you know you could be watching Morning Joe, drinking Blue Mountain, and checking hurricane reports! If you're not on meds yet I'm afraid it's already too late...sorry.

[Feral Child]

112. Oh, I'm on meds.

I'm boocoo dinkydow as I post!

[pinboy3niner]

114. Heh

Now THAT'S a blast from the past, brother!

Get well soon.

[NuclearDem]

118. One of the symptoms is talking TV without context.

[msanthrope]

128. Turn on the TV Right Fuggin' NOW!!!! nt

[hobbit709]

108. That's every day for me when I get up.

But then I live in the allergy capital of the world.

[AngryOldDem]

109. I'm fighting cold symptoms.

But I also broke down and got an internasal flu vaccine yesterday. Usually don't get them. Now I know why.

[yuiyoshida]

110. A sudden hatred of all things FOX NEWS...

AND REPUBLICAN Stupidity.

[malaise]

113. I'm too busy running from Chikungunya

which is all over the Caribbean as I type.

[betsuni]

116. Get well, get well soon, we hope you will get well

[Hotler]

120. Shitty attitude.....n/t

[Javaman]

121. well my internal organs shut down this morning...

and my bowels turned to a bloody mess...

other than that, I'm just fine.

I'm so glad we can find sport in the misery of others.

[NuclearDem]

123. EBOLA ZOMBIE

RUN

[Javaman]

124. do you honestly have any idea what ebola does to the human body?

it's very apparent that you don't care to know.

there are people in Africa dying from this disease at this very moment.

[NuclearDem]

137. I'm not ridiculing Ebola victims.

I'm ridiculing people who think anyone who's sneezed in Dallas in the last week is coming down with it.

[HockeyMom]

127. Flight attendents monitoring bathroom usage

As in how many times during a flight a passenger is using the toilet. CDC suggesting this. Geesch. Pregnant women who need to urinate often and have Morning Sickness? A woman of childbearing age and her time of the month? A young child being potty trained? Imagine the possibilities.

[msanthrope]

129. Lower back pain, abdominal cramping, wind, a yearning for a sturdy red and my

hot water bottle.

Fixin' to start the Ebola, I guess.

[ohnoyoudidnt]

130. I have a slight headache.

It might have something to do with the fifth of tequila I drank last night, but there was a black man behind me at the liquor store. So maybe I should go to the ER just in case

[Barack_America]

158. Totally should. But call CNN first.

They need to know about this.

[FSogol]

133. I smell butter when I sneeze.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

134. headache and vomity

either ebola or the 3 lychee martinis i had last night. never can tell

[mfcorey1]

136. Delusions about winning the lottery!

[FLPanhandle]

139. The primary symptom is worrying about Ebola

If you are worried about Ebola, then you probably have it.

[ellie]

140. Itchy eyes, sinus headache, congestion

hunger pains, my foot hurts where the cat scratched it, grogginess from too much sleep.

[LeftInTX]

142. I think my computer has ebola

[KamaAina]

150. Same here.

[arthritisR_US]

154. I am not fearful of the disease but nor am I

willing to make light of it. People who die from it have families and they still weep.

[Sanity Claws]

155. I yell Benghazi and ISIS all the time

(sarcasm)

[jwirr]

156. Aching muscels but then that might be the arthritis that I have been diagnosed with.

[cwydro]

164. YOU are a bad, bad poster!

Just wanted to say that to chime in with all the nannies wagging fingers at you.