TSA Travelers News: Please remove your shoes...and your underwear.

[Atman]

To make the lines move faster, please wear your underwear on the outside of your pants.

[Sabriel]

1. I'm thinking we should all wear those Starfleet unitards

Judging by 7-of-9, you can't hide anything in there.

[davsand]

6. Trust me--not ALL of us should be wearing those unitards.

Unless you want travel to be even MORE unpleasant than it already is...






Laura

[Atman]

2. Whew...I just heard on the news that there was never a threat to anyone...

Man, what a close call. Exploding underwear somewhere that didn't actually threaten anyone...yet it deserves massive media coverage. I'm just too afraid to tune in to Fox and listen to how they're spinning this. I think I'm more afraid of the news than I am of everything else they tell me I'm supposed to be afraid of.

[derby378]

3. "All right, ma'am, let's see your panties..."

Five hours later, a TSA agent comes home to his wife with a black eye, two missing teeth, various slap marks on the face, an icepack pressed against his groin, and his other arm in a sling. Wifey-poo looks at him and says, "Let me guess..."

[Atman]

4. "But honey...I swear, she could've been holding a bomb up there!"

"I had to do a deep cavity search. I searched and I searched and I searched. Lucky for her she was clean, otherwise I would've had to get serious with her!"

.

[Politicalboi]

5. All this disrobing

And fondling from the TSA could all be stopped if they had bomb sniffing dogs at the same gates as the metal detectors. Walk past the detector, and into a small chamber and a dog will be able to tell if you are carrying anything all while being behind a plastic wall with small holes in it, so there is no dog contact. Easily done. Very inexpensive, less intrusive.

[derby378]

7. Besides, most people LOVE dogs

Even law enforcement dogs. That's humanity for you. And their noses are usually more sensitive than any olfactory surveillance doohickey we hairless apes can create in a lab.

[Atman]

8. Dogs will sniff your crotch without training, or a salary.

Seriously...ever been to the home of a friend who owns a dog? What's the FIRST thing the dog sniffs? Straight for the crotch. SEND IN THE DOGS! We can pay them in Alpo, save billions!

[jp11]

9. Yeah that's great and all but how is that going to put money in someone's pocket while

demeaning people? A nice doggie sniffing for bombs isn't going to make you feel nearly as violated as getting groped or naked scanned.

[longship]

10. Victoria Secret sales are going to go through the roof

And, dare I say, Hanes' boxers.