There is no perfection to being a good parent..... Sometimes ya gotta be lucky.

[trumad]

I'm a Dad--3 kids now 18, 20, 21.

I'm a pretty decent Dad--- pretty liberal, not to strict, never put a hand on my kids, a bit of a pushover especially when it comes to my daughter.

My 20 year old daughter and 18 year old son---not much trouble so far---my 21 year old son got popped for some weed and went through a small phase with pills. He got over it pretty quickly and now won't even touch an aspirin.

They all go to college and I think they will make it into adulthood OK.....

Sure parenting has something to do with it---My wife and I busted our ass so we gotta give ourselves some credit... but I also think there is some luck to it as well.

The mental mind is different for us all--- a tweak there or a tweak here makes us all a bit different--- I have friends that bury me in the parent department---wonderful parents--- attentive and will do anything for their offspring. BUT their kids or kid--- Yowsa...trouble from day one. Constant trouble, disrespect, etc.

Just a couple of weeks ago my daughter told me about a friend of hers that played on her junior volleyball league (a team I coached) who killed herself. Her name was Erin and I remember her well. The girls on the team were 13 years old and Erin stood out from all of them as a kid without any self control. The mother was sweet as could be but was clearly overwhelmed.

Erin and her boyfriend tried to burglarize a home and was caught by the owner of the home. They shot the guy (He's OK) and then fled back to their apartment--- and then pulled a double suicide. She was 20.

All I can think of is her poor Mother--a Mother who probably was buried in anguish for the last 10 years or more.

Parenting in mho is a crapshoot. Absolutely there are bad parents, human beings that should never be parents, parents that can ruin a child's life------- and they come in all shapes and forms. Rich, poor, any color, any race.

BUT there are many terrific parents as well---and sometimes even good parents can have a bad egg.

[justiceischeap]

1. My parents collectively have 4 kids

Two were trouble and 2 aren't. I think a lot depends on the personality of the child. You can't use the same parenting techniques on all your kids 'cause they're individuals and unique in their own right. Certainly what works for one kid doesn't work for another.

There has always been tension between my siblings because my parents raised me differently than the other three (I'm the youngest). By the time I came along they had the whole parenting thing down plus, I wasn't a troublesome kid. I kept to myself and did what I was told. That's not to say I didn't do stupid stuff because I most certainly did but I had a good head on my shoulders and my parents saw that and used that in their parenting techniques.

[Rex]

2. Yeah well the person that started all this bruhaha never replied if they have kids or not.

So easy to take a 30 second snapshot of someone else's life and judge the crap out of them! Usually that is what my RWing relatives do...strange seeing it here on DU.