Texas, this is your last warning. Surrender Now or Else

[Renew Deal]

[AuntPatsy]

1. I have t heard anyone worried ;)

[lumberjack_jeff]

2. We have you surrounded... well mostly.

I suppose you could escape to Mexico... but you had better not do that!

[yallerdawg]

3. I think they're worried!

[lapfog_1]

4. I spent probably 15 min of my life looking into this bullshit...

Did you know that the 5 Walmarts that were closed are "processing centers" for the patriots who will be arrested after martial law is declared in the middle of the "exercise" named Jade Helm 15.

The exercise is call Jade Helm because we are ceding leadership in the world to the Chinese (Jade for China, Helm because they will have control).

Martial Law will happen so that Obama can continue indefinitely as President and he will confiscate all the weapons.

It will happen after China makes the Yuan the international currency thus crashing the dollar and creating the crises.

And that there are movements of military gear all over the place... and helicopters.

And a few of the elite are bailing out (Dave Letterman, Jon Stewart)... because they were tipped off to get out of dodge.

And then there is the empty shipping containers in Wichita... in another Walmart that is undergoing renovation, but they built a wall around the containers and there are no walls around ANY Walmart anywhere.

Walmart is going along with the plan because they are owned by China.

And there are "fake shoppers" in Walmart and all of them wear dog tags which means that they are really military getting ready for the "free stuff giveaway" that will trap all of the good patriots into the processing.

And Obama named a new Joint Chief because the previous one wouldn't go along with the program.

And that there are tunnels being dug under the 5 closed Walmarts... so...

-----------------

The amount of fear and paranoia on the right is clinical insanity... but major repuke leaders are stoking this crap.

[left-of-center2012]

9. I know it's true!

I heard it on Fox News.

[lovemydog]

10. This sounds like the intelligence they used to drag

us into the Iraq War.

[hedda_foil]

11. I wonder who comes up with these "plots" in the first place.

You'd think they could make more as comedy writers. They do show some talent for that sort of thing.

[lapfog_1]

12. It's a weird, almost savant, ability

to take totally unrelated headlines and weave them into some sort of almost cohesive storyline...

Like the part about the Wichita Walmart that is renovating... so reasonably Walmart brings in some shipping containers to either have a place to store construction equipment, inventory that might have to be out of the way, or construction trash... and they built a wall to hide these containers from casual view (they are ugly)... and a fence around them...

And you all of a sudden have a nefarious plot to "process" people and ship them off to secret FEMA camps in containers!

You have to start with the story that 5 Walmarts (out of what, 1000?) closed "suddenly" (the workers, even temp workers, were given two months severance)... and now you have the "Walmart conspiracy".

Then add that two prominent "leftist" late night talk show hosts are retiring, a new Joint Chief of Staff, some movement of military equipment by rail car ( probably coming back from Iraq or Afghanistan ) and a standard exercise for the armed forces... and a *LOT* of paranoia fed by Beck, Fox, etc... and a black President...

and you get this wild ass stuff.

I remember as a kid in Kansas every summer we would see hundreds of tanks, jeeps, WWII troop trucks, etc traveling in these miles long convoys on the Interstate (remember, Ike SOLD the idea of the interstate to Congress for the use by the military!) to participate in some exercise or other... and nobody thought it was a planned military takeover. Except some in the John Birch Society.

I swear the Birchers have taken over like 15 percent of the country... and they are getting nuttier every year.

By now (according to them) the dollar should be worthless, we should all be in FEMA camps, ammunition should be impossible to buy anywhere, old people should be dying by the millions because of death panels deciding who should live and who should die, etc, etc. None of it comes true... and yet, here they are... still wallowing in the paranoia.

[pinboy3niner]

14. Tunnel rumors confirmed: Miners discovered at Texas Wal-Mart

Spotted when neighbors heard strains of 'Heigh-ho, heigh-ho.'

[Monk06]

5. Texas you have til noon to get outa Dodge !!

[Tsiyu]

6. "We're from the government

and we want to help you eradicate your "abstinence-only", immaculately acquired STDs.

If we don't, you won't have to worry about abortion or birth control in the Lone Star State, because all of your diseased kids will be infertile.

Thanks, and we really are here to help. Have a condom."

[C Moon]

7. Hilarious!!

...and all the replies, as well!

[PBass]

8. I think the Enforced Gay Marriage provision is a nice touch.

Thanks, Obama!

I, for one, welcome our new Overlords.

[NuclearDem]

13. Alright, which Walmart-turned-patriot-detention-center have you all been assigned to?

Anyone who needs a ride, we'll be coming by with the black helicopters.

[lapfog_1]

15. I am a secret member of the elite.

I have my Obama bumper sticker on my car.

I will be one of the chosen overlords!

no FEMA camps for me (except the ones I choose to run!).

[pipi_k]

16. "Houston, we have a problem..." n/t