Kim Davis Was Knocked Up With Another Man’s Twins While Married To First Husband

[KamaAina]

Not The Onion!

http://www.joemygod.com/2015/09/01/bombshell-kim-davis-was-knocked-up-with-another-mans-twins-while-married-to-first-husband/

We all knew that Kim Davis has been married four times, but this is some Maury Povich-level fuckery. US News & World Report has the bombshell revelation that she was knocked up with another man’s twins four months before her first divorce. They write:

The Kentucky county clerk facing potentially stiff penalties for refusing to issue same-sex marriage licenses has been married four times, raising questions of hypocrisy and selective application of the Bible to her life. The marriages are documented in court records obtained by U.S. News, which show that Rowan County Clerk Kim Davis divorced three times, first in 1994, then 2006 and again in 2008. She gave birth to twins five months after divorcing her first husband. They were fathered by her third husband but adopted by her second. Davis worked at the clerk’s office at the time of each divorce and has since remarried. Davis has described her desire to strictly adhere to the Bible in stark terms and thus far has shown no sign of bending to court orders on same-sex marriage. She said Tuesday she fears going to hell for violating “a central teaching” of the Bible if she complies with the orders.

Fathered by her third husband and adopted by her second. Even Maury’s head would spin. But according to Liberty Counsel president Mat Staver, Kim has since been washed in the blood of Jesus, so all is forgiven.

The leader of the organization providing her legal representation, Mat Staver of Liberty Counsel, says he’s not sure precisely how many husbands Davis has had, but that it’s not relevant. “I know she was married more than once – I’ve heard three [times],” he says. “It’s a matter of fact that she’s been married multiple times.” Staver says “it’s not really relevant, it’s something that happened in her past” and that her conversion to Christianity about four years ago wiped her slate clean. “It’s something that’s not relevant to the issue at hand,” he says. “She was 180 degrees changed.” In a Tuesday statement released by Liberty Counsel, Davis admitted she had lived an imperfect life, but insisted her current beliefs are sincere.

[pinboy3niner]

1. This is just more irrelevant crap

The only issue is whether a public servant is following the law or not.

[steve2470]

4. +1

As long as she executes the law, she could be a 10 times married adulterous Satanist for all I care!

[enough]

5. The problem may be that she is not willing to be so open-minded about other people's business.

And if she's going to use some sort of "morality" as her justification for her actions, then her "morality" becomes an issue.

[exboyfil]

2. I wonder if her first husband should have forced this onto her

Numbers 5:11-31New International Version (NIV)
The Test for an Unfaithful Wife

11 Then the Lord said to Moses, 12 “Speak to the Israelites and say to them: ‘If a man’s wife goes astray and is unfaithful to him 13 so that another man has sexual relations with her, and this is hidden from her husband and her impurity is undetected (since there is no witness against her and she has not been caught in the act), 14 and if feelings of jealousy come over her husband and he suspects his wife and she is impure—or if he is jealous and suspects her even though she is not impure— 15 then he is to take his wife to the priest. He must also take an offering of a tenth of an ephah[a] of barley flour on her behalf. He must not pour olive oil on it or put incense on it, because it is a grain offering for jealousy, a reminder-offering to draw attention to wrongdoing.

16 “‘The priest shall bring her and have her stand before the Lord. 17 Then he shall take some holy water in a clay jar and put some dust from the tabernacle floor into the water. 18 After the priest has had the woman stand before the Lord, he shall loosen her hair and place in her hands the reminder-offering, the grain offering for jealousy, while he himself holds the bitter water that brings a curse. 19 Then the priest shall put the woman under oath and say to her, “If no other man has had sexual relations with you and you have not gone astray and become impure while married to your husband, may this bitter water that brings a curse not harm you. 20 But if you have gone astray while married to your husband and you have made yourself impure by having sexual relations with a man other than your husband”— 21 here the priest is to put the woman under this curse—“may the Lord cause you to become a curse among your people when he makes your womb miscarry and your abdomen swell. 22 May this water that brings a curse enter your body so that your abdomen swells or your womb miscarries.”

[BeyondGeography]

3. Then she got the fundy EZ Pass

[ripcord]

6. Knocked up?

[KamaAina]

7. Impregnated.

In the U.S., anyway. In the UK it would mean she'd received a phone call.