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meegbear

(25,438 posts)
Wed Sep 9, 2015, 07:02 AM Sep 2015

The Rude Pundit - Dick Cheney: "We're All Gonna Die (Except Me)"

So it was that today, the sewage blob that can take the shape of a man known as "Dick Cheney," who was once the Vice President of the United States, undulated to the lectern at the American Enterprise Insititute (motto: "Allowing fecal goo a platform for years&quot and spewed its diseased combination of apocalyptic madness and paranoia, promising Armageddon should the Iran nuclear pact go into effect.

Despite the fact that Cheney is the one who swatted at phantoms with the full force of the U.S. military, even when told that phantoms don't exist, he insisted, with no evidence at all, that Iran wants to blow up the United States: "With the removal of restrictions on Iran’s ballistic missile program, this agreement will give Iran the means to launch a nuclear attack on the U.S. homeland. I know of no nation in history that has agreed to guarantee that the means of its own destruction will be in the hands of another nation, particularly one that is hostile. What President Obama is asking the United States Congress to do is unique — historically and dangerously unique. The results may be catastrophic."

Other than saying the exact opposite of what the deal actually does, one would have to ask, "What the fuck are you talking about, Dick?" Put aside that if Iran were to "launch a nuclear attack," it would immediately be turned into a large glass parking lot by the full force of our terrifying arsenal and that Iran seems more inclined to want to rejoin the world than fulfill some mass suicide pact. Cheney goes farther than anyone has gone in describing the threat of a nuclear Iran. Usually, it's just "Israel, man, Israel," and that's enough of a whistle to make all the hawk dogs come runnning.

But now Cheney ups the motherfucking ante: You will be nuked by Iran if this agreement goes forward. Your shit will be made radioactive. Your children will burn. (Secretly, Cheney has always masturbated to images of scarred and screaming children. The more chemical the burns, the better. He clicks through the photos by degrees, intensely smacking his Dick dick until he reaches to-the-bone fourth degree and, "Sweet Jesus, thank you for the gift of phosphorus," he cries as he climaxes and blows out his own white powder. When the Code Pink protesters today interrupted by calling him a "war criminal," not only did it not shake Cheney even a little - it made him get hard. Hell, he almost told them to keep chanting so he could go home and commit a few atrocities on Lynne.)

The reactions are as expected from the left and from the rational: Cheney is delusional. Cheney is a liar. Yes, yes, of course, to all of it. But he doesn't care. All that matters is that Cheney justify his madness in the tones of an Old Testament prophet, carrying on about gods that are destroyers of worlds, in order to counter any of the pussies from the old team, like that traitorous black prick, Colin Powell, from incriminating him any further than he already has been.

Cheney is our American cockroach. He will continue to exist unless we actively crush him.

http://rudepundit.blogspot.com/2015/09/dick-cheney-were-all-gonna-die-except-me.html

10 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
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The Rude Pundit - Dick Cheney: "We're All Gonna Die (Except Me)" (Original Post) meegbear Sep 2015 OP
My hate for Dick "the Dick" Cheney is so great... Blus4u Sep 2015 #1
Dick Cheney must live in an alternate universe with a different set of facts liberal N proud Sep 2015 #2
Cheney will outlive the cockroach, thanks to that pact with Satan he made n/t deutsey Sep 2015 #3
When John Donne wrote that each man's death diminishes us, Erich Bloodaxe BSN Sep 2015 #4
"I'd be willing to say yeah it's safe to say IDemo Sep 2015 #5
the Undead cannot die nt geek tragedy Sep 2015 #8
That's one front page obituary over which I won't mourn. n/t lumberjack_jeff Sep 2015 #9
"Cheney is our American cockroach." That's a good one. mnhtnbb Sep 2015 #6
I love it when the rude one LuvNewcastle Sep 2015 #7
his death will be a great gift to humanity olddots Sep 2015 #10

Blus4u

(608 posts)
1. My hate for Dick "the Dick" Cheney is so great...
Wed Sep 9, 2015, 07:11 AM
Sep 2015

... That only the Rude One can adequately express it!
And it pleases me to be able to do it first!

Peace, to all EXCEPT, Dick Cheney

liberal N proud

(60,332 posts)
2. Dick Cheney must live in an alternate universe with a different set of facts
Wed Sep 9, 2015, 07:13 AM
Sep 2015

Because he doesn't seem to be phased when called out on his lies in this one.

Even FOX News would let him perpetuate a lie last week but it didn't stop him from continuing to go after new ones.

He may have a mental condition that puts him in another dimension.

Erich Bloodaxe BSN

(14,733 posts)
4. When John Donne wrote that each man's death diminishes us,
Wed Sep 9, 2015, 07:42 AM
Sep 2015

he had obviously never met Dick Cheney. When that day comes, humanity will be elevated.

IDemo

(16,926 posts)
5. "I'd be willing to say yeah it's safe to say
Wed Sep 9, 2015, 08:58 AM
Sep 2015

He never met Will Rogers."

-James McMurtry - "For All I Know"

mnhtnbb

(31,374 posts)
6. "Cheney is our American cockroach." That's a good one.
Wed Sep 9, 2015, 09:02 AM
Sep 2015

He does just keep reappearing, doesn't he? And he does make you want to
call an exterminator!

PS: Agent Mike, it's just a joke.

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