BoingBoing: How is this Ted Cruz poster not totally homoerotic & weird for a presidential candidate?

[villager]

http://boingboing.net/2015/09/10/how-is-this-ted-cruz-poster-no.html

[randys1]

1. Cruz approved of this photoshopping?

This is real?

[REP]

9. This is a thing that is real that you can buy from Ted Cruz

https://store.tedcruz.org/product/blacklisted-loving-it-poster/

[spanone]

2. ted is insane, but not to this point.

[villager]

5. Actually, to that point, according to Jezebel:

<snip>

Cruz’s campaign has purchased 200 of the original posters from their designer, the conservative street artist who goes by the name Sabo (other work includes portrayals of Wendy Davis as an “abortion Barbie” and Hillary Clinton as a flying monkey from The Wizard of Oz). They are being sold for $50 each. Unrelatedly, Cruz also has a poster for sale that says “Straight Outta Congress.”

So what do we think? Sure, his face still has that greenish pallor and those dead, squinty eyes, but look at the rest of him. Would you tap that? Let’s see here:

Kate Dries: No.

Madeleine Davies: Hell no.

Anna Merlan: Again: the whole face covered, no talking, pretty drunk.

Jane Marie: Prepare to have your minds blown: no.

Joanna Rothkopf: Yeah from behind or something.

Jia Tolentino: ahahahahhahahahaha

<snip>

http://jezebel.com/would-you-have-sex-with-the-cool-and-tough-ted-cruz-in-1729677916

[spanone]

10. wow, he's crazier than i could ever imagine, and i imagined he was pretty damned insane

[blogslut]

37. And Sabo ripped someone else's photo/tattoo art

http://www.tineye.com/search/ba9ea7fbbd1a1e9bd9c093312cfac86487cdc03b/

[TexasTowelie]

3. Cruz can only wish that he was that buff

and had that long of a neck.

[hifiguy]

4. Pony Mind Bleach, PONY MIND BLEACH!!!!

A little better now.

[villager]

6. I didn't have room for a trigger warning in the header!

Sorry.

[hifiguy]

7. No problem.

Just a good excuse for me to post a cute pony, namely Fluttershy.

[villager]

11. Are you a Brony, by any chance?

My perpetual pop culture curiosity propels me to ask!

[hifiguy]

12. I joined the Herd three years ago.

Never looked back.

Been an animation geek since I was a sprout growing up with Looney Tunes and Rocky & Bullwinkle, and a cartoonist friend of 25+ years, in a most dastardly fashion, showed me a couple of MLP clips when he was fixing my laptop. I thought the animation and voice acting were great, but, dude, ponies? I wound up watching the first eps on YouTube, then another, and another, and another, and I was soon down the rabbit hole.

I advertise myself on Equestria Daily - the main fan/news site - as The Oldest Brony In The Herd. I've even been to the local convention twice and BronyCon is on my bucket list.

[villager]

13. Wow! "Fascinating" (to quote another font of pop culture)

You definitely need to get to a BronyCon! My main exposure was through the "BronyCon" episode on Comic Book Men...

[hifiguy]

14. There are a couple of great documentaries out there,

the John deLancie produced "Bronies" and "A Brony Tail" which follows actress Ashleigh Ball (Rainbow Dash and Applejack) around her first pony convention.

And I have been a Star Trek geek for 40+ years.

My cartoonist friend is a staff artist for Bronycon. Last year, promo banners he designed were on trams all over Baltimore for a couple of weeks.

[villager]

15. Sounds like you need to get to Baltimore this summer

Go! It'll be a welcome break from the by-then hysterical Presidential race...

[Shandris]

8. Is this meant to be a joke off of Trump's Illegal/Criminal comments?

Or is this a totally different angle that I just don't grok at all?

Help?

And for the love of the mountains, crop the bottom of that image! And...is that Churchill or FDR? Why would it be either?! GAH!

[Half-Century Man]

17. Bicep of right arm?

Might be Fred Mertz (Frederick Hobart Mertz). 1950s.

[Person 2713]

20. Smoking a Churchill cigar hip hop could be a banger thing

Death before dishonor eagle

[silverweb]

16. Eyeball bleach, please!

[font color="navy" face="Verdana"]This poster really shows what a dignified, religious, conservative "gentleman" Ted is, dontcha think?

[Half-Century Man]

18. Ted being able to sit for all that ink? Not believing it.

Ted tattooing his name right over his own dick, I can believe that.

[Person 2713]

19. Anything goes after that twisted bacon gun video IMO

[liberaltrucker]

21. Two guns pointed at his dick?

Dude's a couple of fries short of a Happy Meal.

[Generic Other]

22. Photoshattoos

A street artist named Sabo made the posters, and when Ted Cruz the Vanilla Ice-wannabee saw them, he ordered reams.

[villager]

23. So to speak?

[JI7]

24. WTF IS THIS

[villager]

25. All too real. Which is to say, a poster really being sold by the Cruz campaign.

As opposed to being a one-sheet for a Fassbinder film like Querelle, for instance.

[Warren DeMontague]

26. He's got two six-shooters, both pointing directly at his dingus.

[Warren DeMontague]

27. I'm sure the actual Ted Cruz looks nowhere as fit in the buff.

He's undoubtedly far more pasty, bloated and gooey.

[villager]

28. I guess he was modeling the photoshop after the Tom of Finland drawings stuffed....

...into one of his desk drawers, somewhere.

[Warren DeMontague]

30. Indeed.

I wonder if the actual guy whose body his head is pasted onto, got royalties- or even knows.

[bunnies]

29. I never knew one could laugh and throw up at the same time.

But that seriously almost just happened. gah.

[haikugal]

31. Yes villager...I'd call it homoeroticism, yes indeed! Ugh....carnival, blech!

[Warren DeMontague]

33. I suspect most self respecting gay dudes find this about as erotic as i would find

A picture of Lynne Cheney in dominatrix garb.

Which is to say.... No.

[haikugal]

34. Ah, I'll take your word for that!

However, isn't the pose etc. what we're talking about? Cruze in any form is anything but erotic.

[Warren DeMontague]

36. I would defer to my gay friends on that, but it seems it would take a significant amount of

Compartmentalization to be able to separate the erotic appeal of the undeniably fit and athletic body from the visage of the smarmy, oily, oddly-bean shaped Cruz head pasted on top of it.

[haikugal]

38. Indeed...it would lol!

What the body (sans tats) suggests the head rejects...like whiplash!

[Warren DeMontague]

32. I'm trying to decipher the meaning in the tats, at least some of which are fake, too.

I mean no one- NO ONE- in their right fucking mind gets an actual tattoo of winston churchill, do they? Or is that W.C. Fields?

But, okay. Guns. Flag, star, eagle.. Is that Angelina Jolie on his neck?

[villager]

39. I thought it was W.C. Fields at first, too!

But I guess the Photoshop is actually Churchill....

Shouldn't Photoshop Cruz be smoking a cigar then?

[Warren DeMontague]

40. That would just put this thing right over the top, wouldn't it?

Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar, but sometimes... Not so much.

[herding cats]

35. No he didn't?!

He's actually selling posters of his head awkwardly placed on some other guys apparently nude body which is adorned with a bunch of random tats?

I'm torn between a moment and one!

[Warren DeMontague]

41. WHO WOULD ACTUALLY PUT THIS THING ON THEIR WALL?

I mean, what section of the venn diagram?

[Texas Blues]

42. He said it's wrong. He doesn't smoke.

Last edited Mon Sep 14, 2015, 11:13 AM - Edit history (1)

Or some crap like that. In any case, his website idiot, the same one who failed to obtain the tedcruz.com name, can't even spell. Take a look:



"OTHE".....seriously???

Can't even spell "OTHER" on a major website. What a jackass! And I've got to put UP with his crap here.

I will NOT link to his official site, though TedCruz.com, TedCruz.com, THAT'S TEDCRUZ.COM, is much better.