How WILL the Muslims invade?

[underpants]

9 votes, 0 passes | Time left: Unlimited
	From the North - long beards, long rifles. Blend right in.
	1 (11%)
	From the South - massive group capable of beating the U.S. military juggernaut.. probably go unnoticed.
	0 (0%)
	Boats and airplanes - seized in the Bermuda Triangle era, probably stockpiled in Cuba.
	1 (11%)
	Soccer
	1 (11%)
	Prison - ever growing numbers. Very popular. HUGE! GREAT! Step#2 - getting out.
	1 (11%)
	Choice 6
	1 (11%)
	The Internet.
	0 (0%)
	Tunneling. Oklahoma. Avoid the fracking lines, blame the earthquakes on them.
	1 (11%)
	From the West - time zone thing. The media won't notice it for hours.
	0 (0%)
	It's going to be like Red Dawn. Attack on Friday night DURING the football game.
	3 (33%)
	0 DU members did not wish to select any of the options provided.
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[Journeyman]

1. I remember a comic from the Ronald Reagan era . . .

I believe it was Herblock. It showed a family pulling up in their car at a monument that marked the spot in Texas from which President Reagan had declared that invaders from Nicaragua were only a couple of hours away if they decided to attack. The family were all getting out of the car and the wife was calling to her husband,

"Oh, look, dear -- an hysterical monument."

[MisterP]

6. it was Harlingen where the FSLN was to attack and Roger Staubach who'd kick them out

http://www.reagan.utexas.edu/archives/speeches/1986/072386a.htm
http://www.reagan.utexas.edu/archives/speeches/1986/30386a.htm
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harlingen,_Texas

meanwhile the Contras would take a village, round up all the agronomists, dam-builders, literacy workers, clinic nurses, mayors, etc. and have the villagers on the other side: they'd ask anyone who object to the impending execution to step forward from the line of villagers while pointing their guns at everyone; then they'd slaughter the workers to weaken the state

they had the same population-adjusted death rate as IS, except IS can hold land and build legitimacy while the Guardsmen were always teat-suckers and murderers running an army of enslaved conscripts

[LostOne4Ever]

2. Definitely during the friday night lights! nt

[big_dog]

14. that one cracked me up

you got a tongue in cheek vote there!

[WinkyDink]

3. On little cat feet.

[Marrah_G]

4. All empires get toppled at some point

One day, you just watch, Canada is going to come enslave us all!!!!!!!

[underpants]

7. Davenports and punting on 3rd down

Oh! Canada

[NuclearDem]

12. Don't want to rush you or anything, just surrender when you're ready.

Soorry to make such a fuss aboot this, with this subjugation business.

[Marrah_G]

16. Will there be bacon?

[underpants]

19. Yeah but the beer sucks

[Marrah_G]

29. You cook the bacon and I'll pick up a six of Guiness :)

[Glassunion]

25. Yeah there will, however it will be from the wrong side of the pig.

[jmowreader]

32. Oh noes...

Single payer healthcare, Labatt's beer, and hockey? How will we ever live?

[Marrah_G]

37. It will be a struggle

[jmowreader]

38. The biggest struggle will be learning the lyrics to the Hockey Night in Canada theme song

Not even Canadians can sing the Hockey Night in Canada theme song, so it MUST be rough to learn!

[Marrah_G]

42. ~shudders~

[hifiguy]

44. Those of us in Minnesota could leave the back door open a crack one night

and they could sneak in easily.

I would welcome our new Canuckistani overlords.

[cheapdate]

5. By camel, obviously. Flotillas are forming now off the West Coast of Africa.

[underpants]

8. During hurricane season

Genius.

[shenmue]

9. Model trains

[NutmegYankee]

10. Other - They will be dressed as Killer Klowns from Outer Space. nt

[jmowreader]

40. That's Republicans. There's a difference.

[KentuckyWoman]

11. JoAnn Fabrics will have a muslin sale

and while the evangelical christians and Westboro baptist bunch are decending upon the fabric store to put a stop to muslins being there the Muslims will sneak in.

[underpants]

20. Ah, the old one letter change trick

Like invading Iraq when you really, now on hindsight, wanted to invade Iran

[NuclearDem]

13. Explosive squirrel artillery.

[underpants]

21. No response

There simply is no response to explosive squirrel artillery.

[NuclearDem]

26. Which is exactly why the invasion will be a success!

[PufPuf23]

15. On air on Fox News. First the terrorists will burka the blondes.

America will watch on TV in their living rooms.

CNN will fall next followed by MSNBC.

The next day Islam America will be the new normal for Fox America.

[Hayduke Bomgarte]

17. Other

I'm convinced they'll invade by flying over the Great Wall of China, that's kept the Mexicans out successfully for centuries, in Hindenburg style blimps and somehow landing in middle Uhmerka. We'll never see that coming.

[ProfessorGAC]

18. You Forgot To Mention . . .

. . .that they will be in stealth blimps.

[spanone]

22. Uber.

[underpants]

23. LOL

[pampango]

24. Wait for a horrible war then pretend to be refugees. Thankfully conservatives see right through

that transparent ruse and will build walls to keep it from succeeding.

[mahatmakanejeeves]

27. Wolverines!

[MisterP]

36. ahh, I remember when the Republicans said we needed to give the Taliban more money

even if it was through an ambiguous movie on the nature of violence and how it's the real winner, not any of the sides fighting

[muriel_volestrangler]

28. Choice 6 for the win!

It's the obvious successor to Agenda 21, Area 51 and Plan 9. But not, I hope, Catch 22.

[underpants]

34. :-)

I always throw that into my joke polls and then I found out that there really is an Option6. Sorry can't post the urban dictionary link on this phone.

((n): Option 6 is when an individual procures a sample of the zombie virus then introduces it to a population center, effectively causing the zombie apocalypse. Whenever an individual is faced with a difficult decision (such as which college they should enroll in) and is unable to choose any of their options for the situation, they may instead choose Option 6. Since the zombie apocalypse has begun, they will no longer have to make a choice.

[dembotoz]

52. choice 6 already here watch cnn tommorrow night

[DustyJoe]

30. south

word iz

They will just shave and walk in with a new wave of south americans.
They did find korans all over the mexican border crossings a while back.
Then they exchange the korans for ak47s from the US fast-n-furious stockpiles

ya know
word iz

[Johonny]

31. parachuting ninjas

[underpants]

33. I thought we blew up the Magic monkey bars

We've all seen that stock footage of their training camps. Jump in a hole, jump out of a hole, crawl under barbed wire, THEN the magic monkey bars. Once they completed the monkey bars they magically were all experts at asymmetric warfare, explosives, etc.

Man, Dick and W lied to us about the magic monkey bars TOO?!?!

[Johonny]

35. Ten minutes of waxing the car and painting the fence

can turn any 16 year old boy into a ninja or else American movies have lied to us. Which is an unpatriotic thought that I can not believe because I love America!!!

[underpants]

48. Actually that is true

It took me 8 months working in a lumber yard and I became determined to finish getting my degree.

[haele]

50. But you also need a rockin' musical montage to go with that work...

Or you end up being the lovable but clueless nerd that requires rescue, or the bad guy.

Haele

[olddots]

39. hidden in fast food packaging

they will command us to listen to Taylor Swift till our souls burst .

[underpants]

41. Well we just have to shake it off

Players gonna play play play play
Haters gonna hate hate hate hate

Yes I know that by heart
Yes I am ashamed
Yes I have a 10 year old daughter ....and the Tom Waits CD's are just NOT catching on

[bluedigger]

43. We'll never see them coming.

[hifiguy]

45. We could always fight back with Frank Zappa's proposed Aerosol Pork Grenades:

"Defense Money should be put into manpower and equipment appropriate to the kinds of conflicts we are really going to encounter in the next quarter-century. The manpower should be dedicated, the equipment should be easy to operate and maintain, and the management of military assets should be streamlined. Let's say we have to make some 'show of force.' The most common scenarios involve small guerrilla or terrorist groups. Nuclear retaliation? It has been suggested by others that Aerosol Pork Grenades would be a better deterrent--Islamic Martyrs are denied entrance to heaven if they show up at the gate smelling like a pig. Denial of The Big Payoff removes a certain cachet from acts of voluntary self-destruction."

from "The Real Frank Zappa Book" (emphasis added)

[underpants]

47. Northrop Gruman's low bid was $12M per pig shooter

Smithfield Packing's Armament Dept. is bidding $8,000 per ordinance pig, or "Freedom Swine" as they call them.

[hifiguy]

49. I think the latter is a better deal.

Bacon-grease-filled potato-masher grenades should be even cheaper, though.

[Oneironaut]

46. Through Politically Correct Homosexual Commie Atheist planes

They'll spread the Jesus Hatin' far and wide when they get here. Wolverines!

[First Speaker]

51. They'll invade from the South--and Snidely Whiplash will join them and invade from Canada...

...and both will go around tying women to the railroad tracks...

[kwassa]

53. Hidden in packages of hummus.

They will spring out at parties and attack.

[Bucky]

54. by infiltrating Sesame Street and slowly warping the minds of the future