Borowitz: Congress's Approval Rating No Longer Detectable by Current Technology

[LongTomH]

The Borowitz Report: Congress's Approval No Longer Detectable By Current Technology:

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report) – After a challenging week for the legislative body, the approval rating of the United States Congress has shrunk to a point where it is no longer detectable by the technology currently available, a leading pollster said on Friday.

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report) – After a challenging week for the legislative body, the approval rating of the United States Congress has shrunk to a point where it is no longer detectable by the technology currently available, a leading pollster said on Friday.

At the beginning of the week, you could still see a slight flicker of approval for Congress,” he said. “Then—bam!—the lights went out.”

Logsdon said, however, that people should resist drawing the conclusion that Congress’s approval rating now stands at zero. “They may have support in the range of .0001 per cent or, say, .0000001 per cent,” he said. “Our equipment just isn’t advanced enough to measure it.”

Logsdon said that the swift descent of Congress’s approval rating below detectable levels has surprised experts in the polling profession. “A couple of years ago, when they shut down the government, I wondered, What could they possibly do to become less popular than this?” the pollster said. “Now we know.”

[Peace Patriot]

1. It's the voting machines, stupids!

[Dont call me Shirley]

12. And the manderings of Gerry.

[haydukelives]

2. yet, most of them will be reelected.

easily.

[valerief]

3. It would be interesting to see Congress's approval rating of Congress. Bill Maher made a

good point last night. He said, of the developed nations, the U.S. was dead last in math. However, of those same developed nations, the U.S. was far and away at the top of "confidence" in math ability. Perhaps, Congress has the same overrated sense of ability and accomplishment.

Nah, I know they just don't care and only want to line their pockets. That's the only goal of these skeevers that make up most of Congress.

[Bernardo de La Paz]

4. Kinda like how criminals have high self-esteem. They feel entitled like ... some of the 1%. nt

[Dont call me Shirley]

13. That sounds like the entire .01%.

[Major Hogwash]

5. Why doesn't Rachel Maddow have Democratic Representatives come on her program?

To tell their stories, about how the House Speaker has relegated them to the balcony, or sumpting.
You'd think they would be happy to appear somewhere on tv.
I noticed that Nancy Pelosi doesn't get much face time on tv anymore.

[Old Codger]

6. She

SOLD OUT, her and MSNBC are all in for repugs preferably the drump

[Wounded Bear]

7. She had Bernie on the other night...

I've seen her interview some Dems, though they do seem to be the 3rd Way neo-Dems mostly. I've seen her interview Sen Franken a few times.

[ChiciB1]

8. Franked SOLD OUT... Just Like Howard Dean, Barney Frank, Nancy Pelosi...

and a VERY LONG LONG list of so called Progressive Democrats! We keep laughing how the Repukes are splitting apart, look over her, look over here... WELL it't best WE LOOK AT DEMOCRATS!

AND stop watching MSM! They're owned by HUGE CORPORATIONS who CONTROL the content of what gets reported! WHEN will people start seeing REALITY???

[Wounded Bear]

9. I'll take that under advisement...nt

[SansACause]

11. How much are they paying?

Because I, too, would like to sell out to whatever organization has bought Howard Dean, Nancy Pelosi, and Barney Frank. Because that would be one AWESOME organization to be a part of.

[rocktivity]

10. Kind of like Charlie Sheen's HIV levels

Too low to be detectable, but not gone.

Now that the Onion has gone M$M, Borowitz stands alone as the king of online satire.


rocktivity

[davidn3600]

14. But ask people about their own Representative's approval and it will be high

In other words, most voters say, "I hate Congress, but my guy isn't the problem."

[Octafish]

15. zero...point...zero.

Not even one photon, Mr. Blutarsky.

[Gothmog]

16. I love good satire