Necktie-Gate-- hilarious read

[Fast Walker 52]

http://www.salon.com/2016/12/02/half-windsor-all-fiasco-trumps-necktie-gate-may-undermine-his-statesmanlike-gravitas/

It’s a distressing time for many of us as we look around and see the ascendant Republican Party readying an assault on our already beleaguered social safety net and pluralistic traditions. With so much to worry about, it feels almost cruel to throw yet another crisis onto the pile. Unfortunately, circumstances demand it.

As you might have already seen, Donald Trump was recently photographed emerging from his airplane as a gust of wind caught his necktie and revealed a dirty secret. The president-elect, who is a man of substantial means, holds his necktie together with Scotch tape — a discombobulating mishmash of Armani aesthetics and hobo fashion sense.

As upsetting as this is, I really can’t make head or tail of it. Clearly Trump is concerned about how terribly embarrassing it would be to have the two ends of his tie flopping about willy-nilly. And yet the solution he has landed upon — or someone else in his inner circle has — is to make a third-grade arts-and-crafts project out of his wardrobe.

What the hell is going on here?

Let’s start with the reason why he’s even in the situation of having to tape down his own necktie. Trump likes to wear red “power ties” because he is the living stereotype of a 1980s New York power broker. And he likes to wear his ties long so that they extend well past his belt buckle and form a crimson arrow that points at his crotch. There’s a trade-off for transforming your necktie into a gaudy billboard for your penis: you can’t do what normal people do and just tuck the narrow end into the conveniently placed loop on the back the broad end.

[Cha]

1. Oh look there's the stupid ***** elect.

[livetohike]

3. Hi Cha!

[Cha]

4. Hello, livetohike!

Yes, I could use one of those

Mahalo

[livetohike]

2. I'm having a harder and harder time differentiating fact from fiction.

It's going to be a long four years with this dumb ass.

[wildeyed]

5. That is pretty funny.

Last edited Sat Dec 3, 2016, 10:41 AM - Edit history (1)

I Googled. He does wear his ties ridiculously long. I wonder if he knows that big ties make his, um, look small?

[Fast Walker 52]

12. and this article made me remember, something that hasn't been talked about for a while

this bozo actually bragged about the size of his penis on national TV in one of the primary debates...

[hlthe2b]

6. Admittedly, I don't wear ties, but I had been wondering glad they answered...

"you can’t do what normal people do and just tuck the narrow end into the conveniently placed loop on the back the broad end."

I'd thought that there was some design element that prevent this from being an issue. What a friggin' putz.

[boston bean]

7. He wears his tie so long that the back side of it isn't long enough to reach

the little loop designed to do what the tape in the picture is doing.

[rzemanfl]

8. I think I can see the little loop.

The problem is the tie won't stay in it over his fat gut.

[baldguy]

10. And this is a guy who has his own line of neck ties.

You'd think they could make one that suits his style & meets his needs.

But the ties are really over-priced, poorly put together, made-by-slave-labor, pieces of shit that the manufacturer paid him to slap his name on. They could have been Alfred E. Newman or Ronald McDonald ties, but Trump was the low bidder.

[Fast Walker 52]

13. haha, indeed.

[SeattleVet]

15. Well, he did really piss of China with his Taiwan gaffe...

so maybe they'll retaliate and stop making and shipping tRump crap, and he'll have to get them made someplace that pays a few cents more per day to their labor force. Then he can change the design to move the loop up a few inches.

[A HERETIC I AM]

17. "Slave labor pieces of shit" ?

Wow

[Turn CO Blue]

20. The subject of that sentence is "ties". All of those phrases modify the ties. n/t

[A HERETIC I AM]

22. Now that it's been edited, sure

[Thav]

14. When I get my tie where I want it

The other end is just short of the loop, its so annoying. I usually have a tack or clip for it, but I've also been known to use a paperclip if my kids have messed with my stuff again and I'm in a hurry.

That said, a rich guy with his own line of ties having to use tape... hilarious.

[Lars39]

24. A common alteration is to have the loop moved a bit.

[madaboutharry]

9. People who are sundowning and showing early signs of dementia

do things like this. They begin to forget the ordinary and commonplace solutions to problems and start improvising. It is like turning on the stove to warm up a room instead of turning up the heat.

His well known sleeping patterns are another sign.

[Fast Walker 52]

11. hmm, interesting thought

[JudyM]

16. Good one. K&R.

[Mc Mike]

18. I've had it with him. Time for impeachment hearings.

[smirkymonkey]

19. God, what a hideous person.

Such a revolting individual.

[Wounded Bear]

21. "Undermine his statesmanlike gravitas"

Probably the funniest line in the piece.

[Skittles]

23. no one has mentioned his hair

it still looks RIDICULOUS