Does anyone else feel they are stuck in a job where they have to put on a mask..

[Locut0s]

Does anyone else here work a job where they feel they have to wear a mask that goes against their own beliefs? Due to severe depression and anxiety issues I have been working retail jobs most of my life despite technically having the aptitude for so much more. I've always wanted to be a cosmologist or mathematician and I've had the smarts for it. Which is NOT to look down on those in retail. I have met more amazing friends in my years of retail than I ever did at school. Bit I don't feel good about myself because I know technically I am capable of much more. At any rate I have had to put on a mask of the gung go employee. Or rather I should say I have done so willingly because I terribly fear failure, and because I am by nature a hard worker and perfectionist. But it has mean swallinging a lot of bullshit. We daily receive pressure from above in the form of cloyingly worded emails about having to come together as a retail team to "crush it". They even send out emails personally shaming and praising certain individuals based on a ranking of some specific metric they are tracking that week. The truth is that the results are as much down to random hapistance as anything. At any rate I detest that I have to deal with this on a daily basis. At the store level I have made some cloae friends and in general people are amazing. But I can't help always but feel that I'm having to bury who I really am when I'm forced every day to send an email back to head office about who in the store did the best and who did the worst and how we are going to take actions to make sure the worst do better. Can anyone else here relate?

[JI7]

1. i can understand what you are saying because i have some experience. is it difficult to find a job

in your field of cosmologist or mathematician ?

i work in retail but my experience is more in smaller business or things where i'm more independent so it's not so bad. but i have seen how it is with others and all the crap about "yayyyy team".

do you work for a large corporation ?

[Cracklin Charlie]

2. Those people up the chain have to have something to do.

So they send out lame-ass emails about "Yea, Team!"

I have worked at some jobs like that. One in particular at Macy's, where they would have me move clothes from one rack to another. I would go in there the next day, and those clothes would be right back where I had moved them from! I just always figured if I went in there everyday and did my best, they should have nothing to complain about. Did some of them find things to complain about?

Of course they did.

I was just always glad I didn't have their job.

[pangaia]

3. God, I thought you said your interests were in cosmetology and mathematics.

I can feel what you mean... that ain't fun...

I am a retired classical musician and occasional jazz drummer.. SO, I was very lucky...86% of what I did was 100% enjoyable and I loved it.. About the worst was having to play the Nutcracker 65 times every year, or the HOLIDAY ON ICE, and play for skating monkeys, or actually...most pops concerts were a real drag-- lots of notes but no substance (STAR WARS sucks but it sure brings in the $$$ KACHING !!!).......or playing fraternity parties in a "mickey band" when I was in college....zzzzzzzzzzzz "Sticks or brushes?" zzzzzzz

OK.. I don't know your age or circumstances, but ..Can you possibly go to school part time and work toward a degree in either of those fields.. It would be a long haul but.. man I have always loved math AND cosmology.. but...

That's just the first thing that pops into my head.... maybe not so easy.....



OR--------- if you must stay in retail,, can you find work somewhere else.....?

[bettyellen]

4. Corporate America is totally like this from bottom to top- stupid evaluations and metrics and

No time for talking about what's actually going well or what's really wrong. Think about trying to find work for a smaller company or one with a less corporate culture. There's no fighting it. Some people can cope with it but mostly it sucks.

[struggle4progress]

5. I teach. What would you do in this situation?

Me: Are there any questions about what we've been going over the last few days?

Student asks question about something I've repeatedly gone over, demonstrating that student hasn't been paying any attention

Me: *slow calm detailed review of that topic*

Me: Any other questions?

Second student asks exactly same question just asked, in slightly different words but phrased as an entirely new and unrelated question, demonstrating that this student hasn't been paying any attention and still isn't paying any attention

Me: *second slow calm detailed review of that topic, organized somewhat differently*

Me: Any other questions?

Third student now asks exactly same question just asked twice before, again in slightly different words but phrased as an entirely new and unrelated question, demonstrating that this student hasn't been paying any attention and really isn't paying any attention

Me: *without eye-roll or any tone suggesting that the world might be bettered by the throttling of this student, yet another slow calm detailed review of that topic, once again organized somewhat differently than either prior answer*

Me: Well, let's begin today's lecture

[CajunBlazer]

6. I guess I am luckier than I thought

[Javaman]

7. if you work with the public or in corporate environment, you always wear a mask.

i would rather be drawing all day long than sitting at my work desk pushing electronic paper all day long.

drawing doesn't pay the bills, pushing e-paper sadly does.

one day, I will retire and tell everyone to fuck off, but until then, I play the game.

and a game is what it is.

[karadax]

8. I think almost everyone can relate at some point.

Nearly everyone has a boss. When they show up all of a sudden everyone changes their tune and are instantly the most productive, polite, friendly yes-sir types you've ever seen. We all fear the boss. For me, it took a disagreement with management about breaks to actually sit down, read our companies union agreement to feel empowered enough to not care what management thought so long as I was playing by the rules. I stopped being scared and started realizing it was a professional relationship.

Retail gets a bad wrap for being a "dead end job" but it really isn't. You said you like mathematics. Retail stores are only the outer surface of the company. There is a whole monster of a machine behind the scenes that has many different kinds of jobs. Accounting, logistics, warehouse, information systems. You name it. Retail needs those people. You can work for Walmart AND be someone that works on computers and networking systems. You can work for a grocery store chain and be a number cruncher that makes $100,000 a year.

I would encourage you to pursue your dream. Find out what exists behind the scenes at your place of employment. Aim for a job and get it ! Most companies prefer to hire from within. They want loyal people. Upward mobility exists. You're in a stronger position for your dream job than you probably realize.