A group of us decided to visit the homes of our friends' elderly parents

[malaise]

and give them a house cleaning. We lined up carpet cleaners, floor cleaners and furniture cleaners. We did the drapes ourselves.
Then we left them a Christmas plant and a nice meal. It's time consuming but it's so much fun and watching them smile is worth it. I'm making some wreaths on the weekend for them - it's only five of them. One of the grandsons has been helping us and loving it.

They can't do it themselves anymore despite the belief that they can.

It started by accident since the mother of a good friend was hospitalized and her daughter told us the place was a mess. Her mom was resisting her help for months so while she was in hospital, she let us take the opportunity to clean up the place. Her mom is now home and delighted with the way the place smells and looks.

That's Christmas 2016 - other than our annual dinner.

[fleabiscuit]

1. That's top notch. KICK

[malaise]

12. Funny how unplanned things work out

That was how it started

[madinmaryland]

2. Thanks for the story! It is great to hear there are still human beings that care.

Kicked and Recommended!!

[malaise]

13. Ignore cable TV 'news'

Lots of good is everywhere

[madinmaryland]

21. We dropped cable nearly two years ago. Still have TV, and with

SlingTV we do get CNN, but in the two years we have had it, I have watched maybe an hour or two in total. We have over the air TV, and I do watch local news and the nightly news just to see how the M$M is skewing the news.

[malaise]

26. I prefer local news

It's about people

[PoindexterOglethorpe]

3. How very, very kind and generous of you.

While I'm not in that elderly category as yet, I know I'm not very good at cleaning, so about a year ago I broke down and hired the local Merry Maids. They are so worth it! They come every other week, I'm keeping my place much tidier than I used to, and am so happy about what they do. Get this: they even wash my windows!

[malaise]

7. Us

Love that Merry Maids idea - we'll all need them eventually
Clean windows improve people's moods they say - let the sun in.

What's scary is the amount of dust - must make them sick.

[babylonsister]

4. That should be what it's all about.

Good on ya, malaise.

[malaise]

5. Good on us

Six of us plus a grandson

[Jane Austin]

6. Here's a smaller-scale project that will be appreciated.

Offer to change the smoke alarm batteries and ceiling lights in an older person's home.

I still work and go out every day, but I just can't do these things with my ten-foot ceilings.

Smoke alarms are chirping all over my house and I'm down to one can light in my kitchen.

I guarantee you will be a hero.

[malaise]

8. Great idea

for youngsters near you.

Don't want to be a hero - just to make our friends' parents more comfortable.

[niyad]

54. don't know about where you live, but here, the fire department used to come out to change

smoke alarm batteries for seniors (don't know if they still do, that was a number of years ago)

[HipChick]

9. This is me right now....today I had to replace the wax seal on a leaking toilet

My uncle is in advanced years, and denial about what he can actually do around the house right now

My Aunt has been trying to get someone in to take care of the plumbing issue, but he stubbornly refuses and keeps saying he is going to take care of it himself...I stopped by the hardware store before I went over, I have never tackled a plumbing job like this in my life...Did a quick search on youtube, didn't look too hard...figured out how to drain and move the toilet, put the wax seal down ..about 1 hrs later...Done,fixed, Happy Aunt! I got some delicious food, helped them clean out the garage, and other stuff around..I'll be stopping back for Xmas to get my dinner and drinks..

[malaise]

10. Let her arrange for him to be away for most of the day

lunch, medical appointment, time with his friends, day at the spa - and bring in whoever needs to be there.

[malaise]

11. You're a good person

[HipChick]

57. We look after our eldery..

we do not place them in homes, nursing care..

One of the saddest things I experienced last year was visiting family friends, and both the wife and husband were in nursing care homes...the children never visited..

[panader0]

14. What a fine gesture--how old do I have to be to qualify?

Seriously malaise--that was fine.

[malaise]

15. Hehehehhe

You're too young

[msongs]

16. that's fine. keep going back to be social and friendly nt

[romanic]

17. Sounds like a great way to spend the holidays.

2016 may have sucked but nothing can dampen Christmas cheer. :3

[malaise]

24. Groper Don the Con is not dampening our holiday cheer

Not a bit

[smirkymonkey]

18. How good of you and your friends!

What a lovely Christmas gift!

[malaise]

28. We've all been friends for well over 35 years

and all the parents treated and treat us like family.

[TygrBright]

19. Thank you for sharing this. Gave me a real "holiday smile." n/t

[LisaM]

20. How fun!

I remember once my boyfriend's grandmother, who was in her 90s, needed to go to the hospital overnight and I took the opportunity to clean her bedroom (she was bedridden). I remember that she was really pleased to come back to a clean, cozy bed.

[malaise]

23. They get grumpy for a bit

Then they smile and enjoy the smell of clean - being old is not easy

[LisaM]

35. No, and I won't go into details, but her bed was icky.

I don't think she realized it while she was actually in it, but she certainly liked it being clean.

[malaise]

38. Glad you made it better for her

[LisaM]

44. Glad you started your wonderful tradition!

May it come back to bless you in your old age. Happy Holidays!

[malaise]

46. Happy Holidays sis

[madokie]

22. Awesome

[MineralMan]

25. Bravi Tutti!

Thanks to all of you for doing that!

[malaise]

29. Well you look after your folks really well

Funny how much they love 'stuff' - no other word describes what they hold on to

[MineralMan]

40. Stuff seems to connect people to many things.

There's always a story for stuff people can't give up. I started asking people about odd things they keep, starting with my grandmother when I was small. Each time, I got to hear a story from her life. Things are memory aids.

Often, when I visit an elder, I look around for the most unusual thing in the room and ask about it. It never fails to bring out some story from that person's life. Now that I'm an elder myself, I appreciate people asking about the odd things I keep around, too.

[malaise]

43. You're right

like the only photo of one of the mom's grandmother - the fact that it's falling to bits is irrelevant

Thing is the grand kids could fix that

[blm]

27. and this is yet another reason why I adore you, malaise..

(( ))

[malaise]

30. Love you back

[etherealtruth]

31. How wonderful, you and your friends are truly extraordinary people! n/t

[malaise]

33. My friend whose mom was in hospital was so thrilled at the job we did for her mom

and her mom's reaction despite resistance for months that she suggested we did the same for the mom of another one of our group - and so it spread. Someone knew the cleaners well - and we got a really good deal from them. Most drapes just need a good soaking and wash well in a machine.

[etherealtruth]

34. incredibly awesome acts on your part!

[demigoddess]

32. thanks to all of you for doing this. As I am getting on in years I understand how the

work can get too much for you. But you stepped in and did very good deeds. Bless you.

[malaise]

36. Thing is we're all aware that we aren't too far behind them

In fact we joked that it won't belong when we are in the same position - and just as stubborn

[marlakay]

37. That's really sweet

My mom almost 89 thinks she can do it to, and it bugs me she would rather waste money at Indian casinos than pay for a helper.

I want to help her myself but after a six hour drive i am usually having back issues myself.

Last time i went i did a ton of laundry and shopping for her.

She did finally say she is going to get groceries delivered. She lives on second floor no elevator of senior apts, refuses to move, we had huge argument over it, so i guess its her life.

[malaise]

41. She just wants to go out and have fun

It's hard to watch but it's true.

Elderly parents are hard on themselves and their children but it's really hard to give up independence.

[marlakay]

49. I know this and keep telling myself

I won't do the same to my kids.

I mostly ignore i want her to have fun, but I can't afford to help because we are retired too.

Her doc says she could live to 100, i tell my husband falling down the stairs will kill her first or driving 40 on the freeway.

They just gave her another 4 yrs...as more and more bumps on her car from not seeing curbs etc...

We just moved to a single story house, preparing for older age. I think thats why i get irritable at times thinking she is not dumb could have moved downstairs years ago. She told me she was on a list but i found out a few months ago she lied, why our argument.

We told her we would do the whole move, pack, clean, etc.

[malaise]

50. Good move - way too many older citizens

fall down stairs. My mom was already ill but she fell at one of my sisters' homes back in 1994 and died two weeks later.

Some parents are stubborn to the end.

[spanone]

39. now THAT'S Christmas.....

[malaise]

42. Yep

[Raster]

45. Bless your hearts, malaise!

This is the true spirit of Christmas! Very best to you!

[joanbarnes]

47. Bless you!

[Generic Other]

48. You are the kind of person who restores my faith in humanity

You show the true Christmas spirit. Even when the world is in bloody ruins, some people find the way -- one stitch at a time -- to try and sew the wounds back up.

Thanks, Malaise.

[malaise]

52. If we can't make it better for our own inner circle of elderly folks

how can we help the planet - one stitch should begin among those we say we love and most elderly folks need help even though they're too proud to ask.

[bravenak]

51. You guys are too good

[malaise]

67. Those old folks have been

very good to us

[BlancheSplanchnik]

53. I like your group of friends!

[malaise]

63. Same here

we have been friends for so long that the parents who are still alive are our parents too.

[magicarpet]

55. What would Jesus do ......

WWJD - exactly -precicously - absolutely this.

Listen up Xtian Fundy's - This is how you accomplish God's work. Care, concern and human welfare the best attributes of human beings. Love thy neighbor.

Bless you Malaise.

[nolabear]

56. What a great way to take care of your fellow humans.

It's hard to think there's no hope when people like you are around.

[malaise]

65. There are lots of good people around across out planet

Sadly our media believes we only want bad stories

[tosh]

58. That is just BEAUTIFUL!

[bettyellen]

59. OMG I do love you Malaise! What a lovely thing to do

[malaise]

66. I pitched in

with my friends

[pipi_k]

60. Very cool, and...

best Christmas gift ever for older people.

We don't need more coffee mugs and little dust catcher doodad thingies on our shelves.

I tell my kids, no clothing please. They don't know my tastes and they always misjudge sizes (usually buying too small).

Someone coming to do a complete clean on my house would be so awesome. Also, cooking up a bunch of dinners and freezing them so I can take a break from cooking every now and then (I am seriously scary and dangerous in the kitchen nowadays).

The very best gifts are often not found in a box.

[malaise]

64. I love your cooking idea

[sueh]

61. That's so wonderful, malaise. A helping hand is always a wonderful gift!

[malaise]

75. Thanks

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

62. Such kindness is a thousand times more impressive than

Trump's fking ill-gotten cash, but too many Americans are impressed by assholes like him.

My husband and I traveled to my Mom's house and bought, put up, and decorated a tree for her. (My dad is out of town until the 19th.) We also helped her decorate and did some cleaning for her. Honestly, we had a million things to do at our own home, but we could tell she really needed some help.

Can't say we've ever done the same for other people's parents, though!

[malaise]

68. That was lovely

[Ilsa]

69. My church does this. nt

[Granny M]

70. What a wonderful gift.

Wishing you joy this Christmas.

[malaise]

73. Back at you

[Frustratedlady]

71. I am also one of the elderly and just downsized to a ranch home...

However, I found a way to pay back my kids and friends who helped with the remodeling/move and, in the process, I also found a way to help other elderly people and bring enjoyment to myself.

I love to cook, but making large quantities of soup, spaghetti, meatloaf, etc., was a waste because I either got tired of eating the same old/same old, or threw food out since I'm not too wild about frozen leftovers. In my new area of town, I discovered there were quite a few elderly who were not eating right, got tired of Meals/Wheels and needed a break. (Our M/Ws are delicious, but you DO need a break since the menu cycles.)

So now, when I make a huge pot of soup or entrees (which I love to do), I bag up containers, along with fruit and homemade breads, then my daughter and sil deliver them after work while the food is hot and ready to eat. The people are overjoyed that someone thought of them. My retired sil delivers M/Ws, so he knows who is needy and who is down in the mouth. He said he could tell a difference in their attitude after the bags were delivered that lasted for days. The only problem I have is those big pots...hard to handle and wash, but it's worth the extra time.

One other plus is that, being from a generation of neighborly people, they always take the time to call and let me know how grateful they were to have the surprise meal. This gives them time to talk about their situation and get a lot of things off their chest. I feel that has as many advantages for them as the hot meals.

I grew up on a farm and when anyone was in trouble, providing food was the first thought of the housewife. My mother always felt that a full tummy makes the brain work better and decisions come more quickly. She was usually the first one to arrive.

Bless you for caring.

[malaise]

72. I love your huge pot of soup

I can imagine how folks look forward to that. My dad's oldest sister used to make a huge pot of soup and bread on Fridays and the hungry knew it would be there. She was a wonderful lady.

[GeoWilliam750]

74. Very good on you

You and your friends are wonderful examples to us all.