CO Rep. Gordon Klingenschmitt Says Gay People Are Throwing Christians Off Roofs (IT'S A METAPHOR)
(we give thanks that this asshole will not be in the state house come jan)
Not Even Wrong
Colorado Rep. Gordon Klingenschmitt Says Gay People Are Throwing Christians Off Roofs (IT’S A METAPHOR)
image: 
Dude looks more like Dr. Evil every year. 'One millllion dollars.'
Beloved Colorado wackaloon God-man and soon to be former Colorado state Representative Gordon Klingenschmitt did one of those trippy “Gays are like something I don’t like but that is also totally unlike reality” things he’s so famous for, this time deciding that gays who insist on getting wedding invitations printed at businesses that are open to the public, just as if they were human beings, are precisely like ISIS extremists who murder gays. Well, yeah, that makes sense, because Gordon Klingenschmitt uses similes like a drunken lemur might wield a TEC-9 loaded with Mike & Ikes.*
On a recent installment of his apostrophe-blaspheming “Pray In Jesus Name” radio show and webcast, Klingenschmitt told the harrowing tale of an oppressed Christian stationery shop in Phoenix that was found to be in violation of a local nondiscrimination ordinance when it refused to print up wedding invitations for a gay couple. After that, he shared a Fox News story about the murder of a gay man in Aleppo, Syria, by ISIS’s religious police, known as the “hisbah,” which threw the man to his death from a rooftop; a crowd then stoned his dead body. Klingenschmitt then explained the completely obvious parallels between the two events, which to the non-insane among us might seem disparate indeed:
Klingenschmitt decried as demonic “the Muslim spirit of violence” that motivated the killing, but then pivoted to how America is doing the very same thing, comparing ISIS’s “religious police” to the
religious police in Phoenix [who] are going around to the Christians who refuse to print the wedding invitations and they’re saying, “Because you’re Christian, you’re going to go to to jail for six months.”** Now how is that any different? We have religious police here in America that are doing the same, on a lesser scale, to the Christians here in America that the Islamic State is doing to the homosexuals in Syria.
Oh! We think we know the difference! We know! If you want to run a business that serves the public, you have to serve everyone in the public! And if your Christian beliefs mean you can’t actually do that job, you might want to find another line of business! There is literally nothing in the Bible that says Jesus will send you to hell for printing tacky invitations to anyone’s wedding at all, regardless of what those customers do with their dangly bits. Also, “doing the same thing, on a lesser scale,” would really be a lot more like pulling away a Christian’s chair when they went to sit down, which would still be bad, but at least similar, what with gravity and all. Fining someone for discrimination is really very, very little like murdering someone for being gay because your dumb religion says you should.
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Read more at http://wonkette.com/609477/colorado-rep-gordon-klingenschmitt-says-gay-people-are-throwing-christians-off-roofs-its-a-metaphor#YYJGReyusQ2APrIC.99
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