Nation Throws Off Tyrannical Yoke Of Moderate Respect For Women

[Snarkoleptic]

http://www.theonion.com/article/nation-throws-tyrannical-yoke-moderate-respect-wom-54664

OK, satire may be on life-support, but not quite dead yet.

WASHINGTON—Political experts are hailing Donald Trump’s historic presidential victory early Wednesday as a resounding declaration that the nation is finally ready to cast off the tyrannical yoke of moderate respect for women that has suffocated the citizens of this country for generations. “Under Trump’s presidency, we can now look ahead to a bold new era in America in which we will no longer suffer under a repressive ideology that demands basic decency and relatively equal treatment toward half the nation’s population,” said Harvard political science professor Gregory Nagle, adding that citizens could now live free from the fear that they would never again be lightly chastised for making derogatory comments about a woman’s appearance or implying that women are less capable or intelligent than men. “For far too long, Americans have been at the mercy of an authoritarian belief system that sometimes presses employers to consider hiring women for high-level positions and, under certain circumstances, allows women to have control over their own bodies. And faced with the unsavory prospect of women receiving fair pay or having their sexual assault claims taken seriously, Americans went to the polls today and made their voices heard loud and clear. This is a bright new day for America.” In a similar finding, political scientists asserted that Trump’s election also represented a decisive move by the people of this country to shake off the brutal fetters of half-hearted attempts at racial tolerance.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

1. The Onion nails it again - but this one's sad and true and not very funny.

[niyad]

2. Onion spot on, as usual. scarily true.

[byronius]

3. Too real.

[Maru Kitteh]

4. Remember when the onion was funny instead of crushingly depressing and true?

[Beartracks]

5. GOPers really do find it to be "authoritarian"....

... to expect equality and decent treatment for all Americans. No satire there!

============

[treestar]

6. Funny in a sad way

Satire is close to gone!

[lastlib]

7. It's almost too close to reality to be satire....

. .