Dear Fellow Elected Republicans
If you’ve been following the news, you already know that we are under attack from angry voters. They are swarming our offices, disrupting our town halls, marching in the streets, and even protesting outside of our homes.
I urge you to stand strong, and not be intimidated by the citizenry (aka “rabble”) who seem to believe that they should have a say in what we do.
We have too much important work ahead of us to be distracted by the people whose lives we are destroying.
We have yet to reach our goal of overturning Obamacare, ensuring that hundreds of thousands of our fellow Americans will sicken and die.
We have yet to put automatic weapons into the hands of every mentally unstable person in the country.
We have yet to completely dismantle programs that feed the hungry and/or house the homeless.
We have yet to rid ourselves of the potential terrorists who are flooding into the country, whose goal is to take good jobs away from our home-grown terrorists.
We have yet to completely destroy our education system and despite our best efforts, there are still children who are learning actual history and science.
We have yet to plunge the nation into a depression, so that more people will lose their jobs, their homes, and their life’s savings.
We have yet to force all Americans to pretend to be Christians in the same way we pretend to be Christians.
It is with great sadness that I have to report there are still people in this country who believe in democracy and freedom. There are still people who believe in the Constitution and the Bill of Rights. There are still people who not only want to vote, they want their votes counted. And most troubling of all, not only do women persist in having dominion over their own bodies, they are also still allowed to vote!
It is imperative that we Republicans in office work expeditiously to do as much damage as possible before “our” pResident – the man we worked so diligently to put in the White House – is proven to be a traitor beholding to our sworn enemy, Putin, and the Russians he owes his presidency to.
Therefore, time is of the essence. Do not be deterred by “the People”, who are using every means possible to keep us from wreaking havoc on their lives and the country as a whole. We must be diligent in achieving as many of our goals as possible before our Exalted Leader is led away in handcuffs, before those of us who knew of his treason are also implicated and possibly indicted, before our party is exposed for what it is – the Enemy of the People whose interests we swore to protect and serve.
If we stand together in solidarity, we can accomplish the complete destruction of our once-respected nation – while we laugh our asses off over that whole “Make America Great Again!” bullshit!
Yours Truly,
The Republican Party
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