Trump Boys Gather Rations Of Comic Books, Candy Bars For Night Hiding From Special Prosecutors

[Zorro]

WASHINGTON—Saying they could “live out here in the wild for months” if they had to, Eric Trump and Donald Trump Jr. reportedly spent Wednesday rounding up supplies of comic books and candy bars as they prepared to hide out that night from special prosecutors in their makeshift White House Rose Garden fort.

According to sources, the Trump boys were seen carrying pillows, fruit snacks, a Connect Four game, an assortment of action figures, a screwdriver, a pair of plates from the State Dining Room’s china service, and other supplies, making several trips out to the blanket fort where they planned to lie low during Special Counsel Robert Mueller’s investigation into links between Russia and their father’s presidential campaign.

“No one’s getting inside here—this place is super secure,” said Donald Jr., dumping a pillowcase filled with butter knives, a deck of Pokémon cards, and several individually wrapped Swiss cake rolls onto the fort’s grass floor. “We can forage during the day and sleep here at night. Mueller’s never gonna find us, not with all those leaves and twigs we put on the roof for camouflage.”

“Even if he did, he’d never get past our booby traps,” added Donald Jr., referring to the thorny branches the brothers had gathered from nearby rose bushes and placed around the fort’s perimeter.

http://www.theonion.com/article/trump-boys-gather-rations-comic-books-candy-bars-n-56820

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

1. The Onion strikes again!

[GReedDiamond]

2. That made me laugh...

...that's kinda rare these days.