Top 10 Conservative Idiots #3-18: You Knew The Job Was Dangerous When You Took It Edition

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Top 10 Conservative Idiots #3-18: You Knew The Job Was Dangerous When You Took It Edition

Welcome back to the Top 10 Conservative Idiots! Hey we're bringing the Top 10 a little early this week! This is a long one, so strap in! Interpret that sentence any way you like! No scripts, no HTML5 auto play videos, no begging to subscribe to our ad-filled newsletter or pay $99 a month! Just good old fashioned idiocy! We are back everybody. Let’s lighten things up and talk about computer viruses for the intro shall we? I mean would you really be surprised that Porn Hub has been targeted by virus programmers? Thank you sir! One guy in the audience going “WOOOOOOOOOOO!!!”. And here’s the other thing – it’s… excuse me, it’s a backdoor virus. No, not anal. I’m talking about an actual backdoor virus that you can get on your computer or your laptop. And how the hack worked was it was through advertising. See websites? See why I won’t white list your page in my ad blocker? You can have my ad blocker when you pry it from my cold, dead hands! But getting back to the Porn Hub virus – it would show fake ads that you couldn’t get rid of. I mean let’s think about this here – you have a porn website that’s one of the most popular in America and around the world. You have a backdoor virus that can install itself through advertising. Now that backdoor virus shows fake ads! I mean… how hasn’t this been made for a porno movie? I mean it’s literally the same plot as just about any porno movie you’ve ever seen – only with more backdoor action! So if you go to Porn Hub, you’ll contract a virus that will steal all of your web browsing history! Ain’t living in Trump’s America great? OK enough of the intro. We got a lot of idiocy to cover. But first John Oliver is back and he slams Equifax for profiting off the recent hack, as well as other scammers like Life Lock – who I wouldn’t trust with the combination to my luggage:

Where do we begin this week? Well the first two slots are going to go to our recap of the Values Voters Summit (1,2). Holy fucking shit. In fact we’re going to make this a double dose of our favorite segment “Holy Shit”. These people are off the rails batshit crazy, and even more so with their man Dotard Trump at the hell. At number 3 and 4 is of course President Dotard Trump. He is going rogue and he will probably bring about World War III. In the third slot we’re going to talk about Trump’s (3) Iran speech and my god. I am going to need several adult beverages here to get through this because unlike North Korea, we’re all gonna die. At number 4, we originally had a much different entry going to talk about the Adult Day Care Center at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, but then Donald Trump (4) had to go and call the widow of one of the fallen soldiers in Niger and it was a shit show. Really, truly embarassing. At number 5 we’re going to do something different and talk about “That Darn GOP” because they cray cray. And they are so cray cray that the woman who claims she was abducted by aliens is the sane one! Taking the sixth slot, we’ve got a new installment of “How Is This Still A Thing?”. This time we’re going to ask – “Newt Gingrich’s Career – How Is This Still A Thing?”. At number 7 we’re going to explore what would happen if Trump were impeached and Mike Pence (7) were to become president. At number 8 – why is Lindsay Lohan (8) on the wrong side of everything? I mean she’s spent time in Moscow, love Putin, and now is defending scumbag Harvey Weinstein. Yeah I am not making this up. But on the flip side, Kevin Smith did something pretty remarkable. Taking the number 9 (NEIN!!!!) slot we’ve got a new installment of “I Need A Drink”. Actually more like “I Need A Packet Of Sauce” because we are going to discuss in the level of detail that you’d come to expect from this program – the Rick And Morty Szechwan Sauce Craze. Finally this week its’ more of the Top 10 World Tour (10). This time we’re going to do it Gangnam Style as we head to South Korea and visit the De-Militarized Zone! Plus in the spirit of South Korea, we’ll have some live music from one of South Korea’s most popular bands – BTS who actually have a new album out that was on the US charts! Enjoy! And as always don’t forget the key!

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[font size="8"]Values Voters Summit
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Yes friends! Gather around, friends! Pass the collection plate, friends!!! Yay, during this most troubling of times we once again turn to the holiest among us. But unfortunately we realize that the holiest among us are full of…



Yay, my sons and daughters. Welcome to this week’s mass. This week, the “Values Voters” have proven that they are completely devoid of anything resembling a value at the Values Voters Summit. Values voters. You know those people who will tell you all day long about their “morals and values” when their real value is really money. Yes, that sweet, sweet money! But this year they’re trying harder than ever to push their version of Indiana’s insane “religious freedom” law on the entire country. Yes, in case you’re unaware “religious freedom” has nothing to do with religion or freedom. It has everything to do with Christians being complete dicks to LGBT people. Even our own president has proven that he is full of Holy Shit!

President Trump spoke at the Values Voter Summit today, where he received a rousing round of applause when he bravely declared that under his presidency, people will start saying “Merry Christmas” again.

“We are stopping cold the attacks on Judeo-Christian values,” he said. “As we approach the end of the year—you know, we’re getting near that beautiful Christmas season that people don’t talk about anymore. They don’t use the word Christmas because it’s not politically correct. You go to department stores and they’ll say Happy New Year and they’ll say other things; it’ll be red, they’ll have it painted but they don’t say it. Well, guess what? We’re saying Merry Christmas again.”
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/president-trump-claims-people-dont-use-the-word-christmas-because-its-not-politically-correct/

Sigh…………. Hey Religious Right… there’s one thing that you need to know about this whole “War On Christmas” thing that you’ve been beating into the ground the last 10 years – nobody giveth thine shit! And this might be one of my favorite stories out of the Values Voters Summit. There was this guy:

At the annual Values Voter Summit (VVS) in Washington this weekend, former congresswoman Michele Bachmann, who serves on Donald Trump’s evangelical advisory board, said in an interview with me on SiriusXM Progress that Donald Trump is now a “committed believer” of Jesus Christ and a “man of faith” who has “asked God for help and wisdom.”

Attendee Joel Brind of New Hamburg, New York, a college biology professor, explained that Jesus would have tweeted like Trump.

“If there were twitter then, [Jesus] would have used it in a similar way, I think,” Brind said.

I wouldn’t restrict it to just [Trump’s] tweets. His communications in general are tactically [emulating Christ]. I don’t want to be misinterpreted to say that everything he says is equivalent to gospel. I mean, he’s on the right side, and his tactics are more reminiscent of Christ, of the tactics that Christ used when he walked the earth and which he admonished his followers to use also.
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/michele-bachmann-offers-her-thoughts-on-donald-trump-being-a-man-of-faith_us_59e21416e4b04d1d51821970?ncid=inblnkushpmg00000009

Funny – I’ve read the Bible. I don’t remember The Sermon On The Mount ending with “SAD!”. Thank you very much! And then of course you have the inevitable Taliban comparison:

Gary Bauer of American Values spoke during the afternoon session at the Values Voter Summit today, where he declared that the left has become “an American Taliban” and is working to take down Confederate monuments because “they hate America.”

“We’re also seeing the left now turn into an American Taliban declaring war on our monuments,” he said. “It didn’t start with Southern memorials, it started with the Ten Commandments. In the last couple of decades, we’ve see left-wing groups file lawsuits all over America forcing Ten Commandments plaques and monuments to be taken down from courthouses and schools in state after state after state.”

“Then they went after the Southern monuments,” Bauer continued. “Robert E. Lee, we can’t tolerate that, so they started changing the names of schools and streets. Threw Lee into the grave again—well, he needs to move over because now here comes Jefferson and Franklin and Washington and even Abraham Lincoln. Because the people doing this aren’t just haters of the South, they’re not just haters of Judeo-Christian values, they hate America, that’s why they do these things.”
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/gary-bauer-the-left-has-become-an-american-taliban/

Yay, friends. It don’t get much stupider than at the Values Voters Summit – where the real value is the almighty dollar! Yes, that sweet, sweet green! And then there was ultra far right extremist Roy Moore – you know – the guy who kicked offeth thy bench several times.

As he did during the luncheon held at the Values Voter Summit today, Republican Senate candidate Roy Moore closed out the remarks he delivered from the main stage by reciting a poem he wrote, “America The Beautiful,” which warns that God’s judgment will fall upon this land if the nation does not repent.

Moore said that he is often criticized for infusing his politics with talk of God but that he intends to continue doing so because “when you forget God, you can forget politics … For me, it’s a question of freedom or slavery.”

“This is an awful moment for our country,” Moore said as he quoted Patrick Henry. “Should I keep back my opinions at such a time as this I would consider myself guilty of treason toward my country and an act of disloyalty toward the majesty of heaven, which I revere above all earthly kings.”
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/roy-moore-poetically-asks-how-much-longer-will-it-be-before-his-judgment-comes/

Hopefully it cometh soon, Roy! But we are still noteth done in thine bosom yet! That sounded wrong, didn’t it? Then there was Bill Bennett who offered this choice nugget:

Conservative pundit and former secretary of education Bill Bennett took to the stage at the Values Voter Summit this morning immediately after President Trump to defend Trump against all manner of criticism and to claim that the president is facing enormous media bias.

“If you watch the TV shows other than Fox…you would have no idea how many things the president has already accomplished,” Bennett said, including his “symbolic” victory over the NFL players who have been kneeling during the national anthem to protest racial injustice.

“The president has won on this issue,” Bennett said. “He’s just won.”

He added that the players who are protesting just “don’t know any better” because the schools haven’t taught them about the greatness of America.
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/bill-bennett-to-vvs-nfl-players-taking-a-knee-dont-understand-american-culture/

Yes it be pretty bad when your own savior does it! I mean really Bill do you not understandeth why God’s children hath protest? If you don’t then it is you who don’t understandeth thine culture. And we’re still not done with thine coverage of all things holy this week. The Values Voters are a seemingly endless pool of anything remotely resembling a value.

The Values Voter Summit kicked off on Friday morning, with President Donald Trump set to be the star of the morning’s session. But early risers who made their way to a breakfast session sponsored by Christian Healthcare Ministries were treated to another “president” in the form of George W. Bush impersonator John Morgan.

Morgan is promoting his book, “War on Fear”—which comes with a foreword by Alan Robertson of the Duck Dynasty clan—and a new podcast. Morgan drew chuckles with his gentle ribbing of Bush’s idiosyncratic relationship with the English language.

Most painfully, Morgan picked up a guitar and sang a version of Leonard Cohen’s “Hallelujah,” which he had turned into a praise song to Donald Trump, beginning with “There is a man whose name is Trump, who kicked my baby brother’s rump…” The assembled conservatives sang along on the chorus.
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/at-values-voter-summit-singing-hallelujah-for-god-raising-up-trump/

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[font size="8"]Values Voters Summit – Pt. 2 Electric Boogaloo Die Harder With A Vengeance
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Yay, my sons and daughters. It is now time to passeth thine collection plate. There beith so much news about thine holy ones that it spilleth over into thine second entry. You know what one of my favorite catch phrases among the religious right is? Well, thine own president spells it out quite nicely for you:

President Trump spoke to one of the most faithful blocs of his base on Friday, telling attendees of this year's Values Voter Summit that in America "we don't worship government, we worship God."

Trump was the first sitting president to address the annual gathering of Christian conservatives, and while he has had trouble enacting some of his campaign promises legislatively so far in his term, he has ticked off many boxes with the evangelical voters who helped propel him to the Oval Office.

"We know that it's the family and the church — not government officials — who know best how to create strong and loving communities," Trump said.
http://www.npr.org/2017/10/13/557459193/trump-set-to-address-values-voter-summit-for-first-time-as-president

Yay, what does that even mean? “We worship god, not government”? Does this mean that they pray for recovery in disasters instead of actually help? Like they did for Vegas or Puerto Rico? And then there was this douchebag:

People who attended the Value Voters Summit that President Trump addressed on Friday said they were greeted with anti-LGBT pamphlets that were reportedly distributed at the event.

Pictures of the booklets allegedly handed out at the event appeared to feature insights from the book, "The Health Hazards of Homosexuality," authored by the Mass Resistance, a longtime anti-LGBT hate group based in Massachusetts, according to the Southern Poverty Law Center.

The material included in the booklet, which warned readers of the "public health crisis" created by homosexuals, has earned a swift reaction from Twitter users who have condemned the president for speaking before the Value Voters Summit, despite it also having been deemed a "hate group" by SPLC.
https://www.aol.com/article/news/2017/10/13/anti-lgbt-pamphlets-handed-out-at-values-voter-summit-trump-spoke-at-hate-groups/23242678/

Yeah, BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! Yay, and our president supports these far right whackos! Then the paranoid male was on full display courtesy of Fox News’ Todd Starnes:

Fox News radio host Todd Starnes told listeners at the Values Voter Summit (VVS) that mainstream media discussions about “toxic masculinity” are parts of a “war on men” that aims to “criminalize masculinity.”

In his address to VVS, which is hosted by the anti-LGBT Religious Right group Family Research Council, Starnes complained about the Boy Scouts of America’s recent decision to allow young women to participate in the organization.

Starnes said that Mark Hancock, who runs the Christianity based scouting organization Trail Life USA, told him that the Boy Scouts’ decision was “nothing less than a war on boys.” Starnes elaborated on Hancock’s remarks to him, claiming that “the mainstream media” spread the notion of “toxic masculinity.”
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/todd-starnes-tells-the-values-voter-summit-that-liberals-want-to-criminalize-masculinity/

Then there was right wing humor on display. Yeah that is an oxymoron if there ever was one, that comes courtesy of Laura Ingraham:

During her speech at the Values Voter Summit this afternoon, Laura Ingraham cracked a joke about Harvey Weinstein, invoking a few high-profile Democrats too.

Ingraham rattled off a list of “enemies” of the conservatives in the room, from Antifa to “the NFL anthem squatters” to “most of the entertainment industry, because we know they are the moral arbiters of our time.”

And when she was done with that list, Ingraham made this joke as an aside:

“Finally, speaking of the Weinstein mess in Hollywood, there’s finally a new law firm that has formed to give Gloria Allred a run for her money––you know, she represents a lot of these women who have been abused and subjugated in the workplace. And it’s just formed, it’s gonna be a big deal, it’s called Clinton Weiner Spitzer & Weinstein.”
https://www.mediaite.com/tv/laura-ingraham-jokes-about-clinton-weiner-spitzer-weinstein-law-firm-at-values-voter-summit/

So we had extreme masculinity. We had the right’s patethic excuse for what passes for humor. How about extreme feminism? There was the NRA’s Dana Loesch, who said the word “dead” an uncomfortable amount of times in a short period:

NRA spokeswoman Dana Loesch used part of her speech at the Values Voter Summit today to go on a bizarre rant about feminism, declaring that “feminism exists to subjugate men” but that it is now “dead as a doornail.”

“We are in a post-feminist era,” she said. “Feminism is dead. It is dead as a doornail, it is dead. Feminism is dead.”

Saying that “third-wave feminism has betrayed” women, men, children and “our culture,” Loesch claimed, “Third-wave feminism exists to subjugate men, period. They have replaced the patriarchy with the matriarchy, and they are not a good master.”

“Third-wave feminism says it empowers women—empowers them by convincing women to commit genocide against the female sex in utero,” she said.
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/at-values-voter-summit-dana-loesch-declares-feminism-dead/

Yay, even JAY-SUS thinks you are doing it wrong! It’s JAY-SUS!!!! Hey Everyone Look! It’s Jesus! I get way too much enjoyment out of doing this segment! And then there was this douchebag – Phil Robertson, I tell you – when this guy is on your side, you don’t want to be right!

Phil Robertson of "Duck Dynasty" fame said he often wonders if members of the Democratic Party "love Jesus" or hate Him and warned that the "whole world" is under the control of the Evil One.

After being introduced by his son, Pastor Alan Robertson, at the Family Research Council's Values Voter Summit on Friday, the new CRTV host pulled his Bible from his camouflage bag and talked about how he's dedicated his life to sharing the gospel with those who are "down and out."

He referenced 1 Thessalonians 4:11, which reads, "Make it your ambition to lead a quiet life: You should mind your own business and work with your hands."

Robertson says he strives to live a quiet life and mind his own business - in fact, he's never "turned on the internet and looked at it."

"When I hear about the vitriol and the hatred, just remember I love you," he said. "I really do. You know why? I've identified you as human beings. So, I love you. And God loves you."

"I'm almost tempted to ask the Democratic Party four little words," he continued. "Do y'all love Jesus? The reason I'm asking you, Democratic Party, is I've never heard you say one way or the other. Do you love him? And I'm waiting on an answer."
http://www.gospelherald.com/articles/71490/20171016/phil-robertson-warns-whole-world-under-control-satan-asks-democratic.htm

I’m pretty sure Phil Robertson’s next question is “Hey kids! You want to see a dead body?”. And then an actual reverend spelled it out pretty nicely:

“Actually, from Jeremiah 22 to Jesus and Matthew 25, Christian values for nations and political leaders has to do with love and justice, equality, stopping exploitation of the vulnerable, caring for the poor, caring for children, welcoming immigrants, helping the sick and loving all,” Rev. Barber preached.

“And by these standards, the so-called Values Summit is not about Judeo-Christian values, it’s not about Christianity, but the values of a heretical rhetorical extremism funded by a whole lot of money, perpetrating a fraud on the American people.”

https://www.rawstory.com/2017/10/their-values-are-cash-and-not-christ-rev-barber-rains-holy-hell-on-right-wing-values-voters-summit/

Yay, mass has ended, may you go in peace! That is it this week for:




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[font size="8"]Donald Trump
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So if you thought Trump’s going nuclear on North Korea was insane, wait until you see what he has in store for Iran! Trump’s popularity rating is so low that he’s going to get us all killed in a nuclear holocaust with one country or another. We keep showing you how his constant poking of the hornet’s nest known as North Korea is probably going to get us all killed. If man child Kim Jong Un doesn’t, then Iran most certainly will!

WASHINGTON — President Trump announced on Friday his decision to disavow the Iran nuclear agreement, threatening to leave the deal altogether if it was not amended to permanently block Tehran from building nuclear weapons or intercontinental missiles.

But even as he delivered a fire-breathing indictment of the Iranian government’s activities around the Middle East, he stopped short of unraveling the agreement reached by President Barack Obama two years ago.

“We will not continue down a path whose predictable conclusion is more violence, more chaos, the very real threat of Iran’s nuclear breakout,” Mr. Trump declared at the White House in a speech that was intended to define a broad strategy for confronting Iran.
https://www.nytimes.com/2017/10/13/us/politics/trump-iran-nuclear-deal.html

Yeah so republicans – here’s a little civics lesson for you. And it doesn’t take a Harvard educated history professor to spell it out for you: Not everything Obama did was bad! Preventing a nuclear holocaust between two ultra extremist countries was a good thing!

Long before Donald Trump was mocking “Little Rocket Man” in North Korea, or taunting “fools” in the Republican foreign-policy establishment, he expressed special contempt for one international agreement: the Joint Comprehensive Plan of Action, which blocked Iran from developing a nuclear weapon. After the Obama Administration signed the agreement, in 2015, then candidate Trump called it “the worst deal ever,” and vowed to “renegotiate” it once he was in office. In fact, the landmark agreement capitalized on a rare consensus. After years of hesitating, China and Russia joined the other permanent members of the United Nations Security Council, along with Germany and the European Union, in supporting American pressure on Iran to change course. At a negotiating session in Vienna, the coalition was so large that, for appearance’s sake, Iran stocked its side of the table with additional staffers. Jake Sullivan, one of the U.S. negotiators, recalled, “It was the whole world versus Iran.”
https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2017/10/23/trumps-irrational-hatred-of-the-iran-deal

Even Jesus would be pissed! So in Trump’s quest to undo everything Obama did – he’s rolled back LGBT rights, he’s rolled back workplace protections for transgendered people, he’s throwing trans people out of the United States military, he’s alienated most of our allies, he’s destroying some of America’s finest institutions – really everything that actually *DOES* make America great, and now he’s threatening nuclear war. Thanks Koch Brothers!

In his speech on the Iran nuclear agreement, known formally as the Joint Comprehensive Plan of Action (JCPOA), President Trump made a number of factual assertions. The deal was negotiated by Iran, the five permanent members of the U.N. Security Council (United States, Russia, United Kingdom, France and China), Germany and the European Union.

Here’s a guide to some of his rhetoric, in the order in which he made these statements.

“The regime harbored high-level terrorists in the wake of the 9/11 attacks, including Osama bin Laden’s son.”

The president recounted a long list of aggressive acts by the Iranian government toward the United States since the shah was overthrown in 1979, many of which would be familiar to Americans. This claim — that Iran harbored al-Qaeda terror suspects — might be less well-known, but it was recently documented in a 2017 book, “The Exile,” by investigative reporters Cathy Scott-Clark and Adrian Levy.

The book noted that the steady flow of senior al-Qaeda figures into Iran after the Sept. 11, 2001, attacks was controversial among various factions. The government actually made some arrests and sent some al-Qaeda figures back to countries of origin. But the Revolutionary Guard was more supportive. Trump, in using the phrase “regime,” glosses over the debate within the country.
https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/fact-checker/wp/2017/10/14/fact-checking-president-trumps-speech-on-the-iran-deal/

Well if we all don’t die from a nuclear holocaust perpetrated by North Korea, perhaps we’re all gonna die in one perpetrated by Iran!

The historic 2015 Iran nuclear deal is "on life support" and hanging on "by a thread" after the Trump administration plotted a new course for containing Tehran, analysts warn.

President Donald Trump on Friday refused to certify the accord to Congress. He instead asked lawmakers to toughen the agreement, negotiated between Iran and six world powers, by amending a U.S. law. At the same time, the administration will try to convince European leaders to impose new sanctions on Tehran and return to the negotiating table.

Risk consultancy Eurasia Group reduced the odds of the deal surviving from 60 percent to 55 percent on Friday after Trump said he will terminate the deal if he cannot find a solution with Congress and U.S. allies.
https://www.cnbc.com/2017/10/16/trumps-plan-for-the-iran-nuclear-deal-comes-with-huge-risks.html

Oh and if you think the Russian bots have gone apeshit in the wake of a Trump presidency, just wait and see what the Iran bots have in store! Your fingers are going to be mighty sore from alerting all the fake accounts that are going to spring up as a result of this!

On Friday, President Trump announced that he will not certify Iran’s cooperation with the 2015 nuclear agreement negotiated by the Obama Administration. The move doesn't eliminate or rework the deal, possibilities its proponents feared given Trump's longstanding criticism of the agreement. But it does kick the accord to Congress for reconsideration. There, lawmakers could leave the agreement the same, impose tweaks, or go all the way to reinstating sanctions against Iran, effectively ending the deal.

The fulfillment of Iran's nuclear ambitions remain years away even if this deal falls apart, but Trump's actions also raise questions about whether increased tension will in turn lead to increased Iranian cyber operations. Observers say that while the current diplomatic instability likely won't impact Iran's hacking purview, further decisions—particularly around sanctions—could fuel offensive plans directed at the United States.
https://www.wired.com/story/trump-iran-decertify-cyberattacks/

But some good news is that Trump didn’t officially pull out of the deal so we’re safe for now!

Last week began with a bang: Sen. Bob Corker (R-Tenn.), chairman of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee and a leading GOP voice on foreign policy, made startling comments disparaging President Trump, particularly his handling of foreign policy. Midweek, the world awaited Trump’s decision about the Iran nuclear deal. Even some who had opposed the Iran deal in 2015 called for staying in.

The week ended with Trump’s announcement that, rather than scrapping the deal, he would press Congress to amend the legislation associated with the deal to address what he called its “many serious flaws.” As a coda, at the end of the week Corker renewed his public complaints about Trump’s undercutting of Secretary of State Rex Tillerson.
https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/monkey-cage/wp/2017/10/16/president-trump-didnt-pull-out-of-the-iran-deal-heres-what-that-says-about-the-politics-of-foreign-policy/

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[font size="8"]Donald Trump
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Sigh… this is why we can’t have nice things. I originally had a much different entry prior to today for this segment here. But then something happened that is so jaw-dropping, so unbelievable that even we here at the Top 10 are having a hard time comprehending it. And really we can’t make fun of this with memes or anything because it’s too fucking horrible and shocking, so we won’t try. Instead we’re going to use Trump’s own reactions to this story. So there was that shit show in Niger that had 4 American soldiers killed tragically. Any other president would have instantly called the families of the soldiers involved, but we’re stuck with Donald fucking Trump.

A Florida congresswoman said the family of a U.S. service member killed in Niger was "astonished" when President Donald Trump suggested in a condolence call that the soldier "must've known what he signed up for."

Rep. Frederica Wilson told NBC Miami that she heard the president's comment to Sgt. La David T. Johnson's widow, Myeshia, on a speakerphone as they were traveling together Tuesday to meet his body.

"He said, 'But you know he must've known what he signed up for,'" Wilson, a Democrat, recounted Trump saying more than once during the call to express his sympathy. Wilson said the conversation lasted three to five minutes.
https://www.nbcnews.com/news/military/trump-told-widow-soldier-must-ve-known-what-he-signed-n811756

I mean really, what… how… who… what… the… I just can’t… what the fuck!!!! He knew what he signed up for? I mean who the fuck does he think he is? Super Chicken?

Yeah Trump, you knew the job was dangerous when you took it! And of course like all good republicans do, Trump *NEVER* takes responsibility for his own actions! There’s of course the inevitable denial and blame game ensuing.

After facing criticism for not calling the families of four soldiers who died in combat, President Trump reached out to one of the widows Tuesday and said her husband "knew what he signed up for ... but when it happens it hurts anyway," according to Rep. Frederica Wilson (D-Fla.).

The call between Trump and Myeshia Johnson, the widow of Army Sgt. La David Johnson, lasted about five minutes, according to accounts that Wilson provided to local media.

Wilson, a friend of the family, was in the car for the call, which happened before the fallen soldier's remains arrived at Miami International Airport.

"Yes, he said it," Wilson told the media. "It's so insensitive."

Trump's silence on the deaths of the soldiers, who were killed in combat in Niger on Oct. 6, generated controversy on Monday. When he was asked why he had not commented on their deaths, Trump responded by saying that President Obama and other presidents also had failed to reach out to families of servicemen killed in action.
http://www.latimes.com/politics/washington/la-na-pol-essential-washington-updates-trump-reaches-out-to-slain-soldier-s-1508296621-htmlstory.html

That also – is the exact same reaction that I’m having to this story! Here we have that good old fashioned republican empathy on display. And by empathy, I mean they’re fucking off the rails batshit crazy. So this is how Trump reacts to the widows of soldiers killed. Imagine how he’s going to react when he’s forced to say something about my state of California, which is still on fire! Or the people of Flint, who don’t have drinking water! Or Texas or Puerto Rico! MAGA!!! But it gets weirder:

Washington (CNN)President Donald Trump denied Wednesday the account of a Democratic congresswoman that he told the widow of a US serviceman killed in an ambush in Niger that "he knew what he signed up for, but I guess it still hurt."
"Democrat Congresswoman totally fabricated what I said to the wife of a soldier who died in action (and I have proof). Sad!" he tweeted. He did not immediately provide proof to back the claim. CNN has reached out to the White House.
http://www.cnn.com/2017/10/17/politics/frederica-wilson-widow-fallen-soldier/index.html

That is also another reaction I am having to this story. I mean by the way – do you know how fucking stupid you sound when you call it “The Democrat Party”? It’s DEMOCRATIC. By the way if you want to watch your Fox News loving friends’ heads explode, just simply correct them when they call it “the democrat party”. It’d be like referring to AC/DC as just “AC”. Nobody knows what you’re talking about! I mean how stupid and insensitive can Trump get? Well…

Trump disputes account of his call with soldier’s widow. But congresswoman who heard exchange says it was ‘horrible.’

Wilson told MSNBC on Wednesday that Johnson's widow, Myeshia, was shaken by the exchange.

“She was crying the whole time, and when she hung up the phone, she looked at me and said, ‘He didn’t even remember his name.’ That’s the hurting part.”

Wilson went on to say Trump “was almost like joking. He said, ‘Well, I guess you knew’ — something to the effect that ‘he knew what he was getting into when he signed up, but I guess it hurts anyway.’ You know, just matter-of-factly, that this is what happens, anyone who is signing up for military duty is signing up to die. That’s the way we interpreted it. It was horrible. It was insensitive. It was absolutely crazy, unnecessary. I was livid.”

“She was in tears. She was in tears. And she said, ‘He didn’t even remember his name.’”

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/post-politics/wp/2017/10/18/totally-fabricated-trump-disputes-congresswomans-depiction-of-his-exchange-with-soldiers-widow/?utm_term=.ab14a768b6a4

Yes it is, and in case you’re wondering if Trump couldn’t be anymore of a worthless asshole, there is this interesting bit of information from the AP article:

Altogether some 6,900 Americans have been killed in overseas wars since the Sept. 11, 2001, attacks, the overwhelming majority under Bush and Obama.

Despite the much heavier toll on his watch — more than 800 dead each year from 2004 through 2007 — Bush wrote to all bereaved military families and met or spoke with hundreds if not thousands, said his spokesman, Freddy Ford.

Veterans groups said they had no quarrel with how presidents have recognized the fallen or their families.

“I don’t think there is any president I know of who hasn’t called families,” said Rick Weidman, co-founder and executive director of Vietnam Veterans of America. “President Obama called often and President Bush called often. They also made regular visits to Walter Reed and Bethesda Medical Center, going in the evenings and on Saturdays.”

Trump feuded with one Gold Star family during last year’s campaign, assailing the parents of slain Army Capt. Humayun Khan, who died in Iraq in 2004, after they criticized him from the stage at the Democratic National Convention.
https://apnews.com/d3bf716591bd49d4a8a86f229efe900f

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[font size="8"]Random GOP Insanity
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Anyone remember the times before Donald Trump where would could just make fun of religious zealots or people who claim they were possessed by aliens, or Ted Nugent? Those were good times. And of course Trump dominates the news right now. So it’s pretty obvious to see that some lesser known republicans and random overall insanity can get lost through the cracks. And would you be surprised to learn that the Miami representative who claims she was possessed by aliens is the sane one in this story?

A congressional candidate from Miami can go one better: Bettina Rodriguez Aguilera says she’s been aboard a spaceship too. But this one was crewed by aliens. As in extraterrestrials.

Three blond, big-bodied beings — two females, one male — visited her when she was 7 years old and have communicated telepathically with her several times in her life, she says. (Sen. Bill Nelson served as payload officer aboard the Space Shuttle Columbia in 1986. All seven people aboard were from Earth. As far as is known.)

Rodriguez Aguilera, 59, a Republican who is running to replace retiring Miami Republican Rep. Ileana Ros-Lehtinen, recounted her experience with the ETs during a 2009 television interview.

http://www.miamiherald.com/news/local/community/miami-dade/article178813586.html

Yes really – WTF Lol. I mean come on Rodriguez, the truth is out there, don’t you know? Where’s Mulder and Scully or Blink 182’s Tom DeLonge when you need them?

Thank you sound effects guy! But when it comes to the GOP – one thing you should never, ever do is insert an unpopular opinion into your business. And one guy in Massachusetts got the worst of it when he dared to voice his support of Trump!

HOLYOKE — Business owners in Western Massachusetts apparently associate themselves with the 45th president at their peril.

Just ask Dave Ratner, owner of Dave’s Soda and Pet City, a small chain of shops selling the unlikely combination of pet supplies, birds, fish, and beverages for humans. Ratner attended President Trump’s signing of an executive order authorizing changes to the Affordable Care Act designed to create cheaper — and less comprehensive — health insurance plans. An Associated Press photograph of the event, with Ratner smiling broadly behind Trump, has come back to haunt him, big time.

“It was 42 years of building a wonderful brand and having it destroyed in one day,” said Ratner, interviewed Sunday morning after what he terms “the worst two days of my life.”<snip>
https://www.bostonglobe.com/metro/2017/10/16/dave-ratner-posed-for-photo-with-trump-now-facing-boycott/dvovCqgtAw1QF9wTxvlqVN/story.html

I think even Trump himself is disapproving of this one! I mean come on when you can take 42 years of your life building one business and then knock it down in a day, doesn’t that say something? It also says Massachusetts is full of smart people, but one guy can be the bad light bulb in a string of Christmas lights. And if you think this was an isolated incident, it gets weirder! Then there was this dolt out of Indiana!

failed Republican candidate was arrested after he mailed both a pipe bomb that injured a pregnant postal worker and a threatening letter with a bullet inside, according to the FBI.

Eric. P. Krieg, 45, of Munster, Ind,. was arrested Thursday and charged with knowing possession of a destructive device and transporting explosive materials, said U.S. Attorney Thomas Kirsch.

Krieg, an engineer who ran for Lake County councilman and surveyor, maintained a political blog which he used to slam the Lake County Democratic Party and Hammond Mayor Thomas McDermott Jr., according to the Northwest Indiana Times.
http://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/gop-candidate-arrested-sending-pipe-bomb-package-article-1.3561785

And it couldn’t be any more disappointing am I right? And if you need any further proof why we can’t nice things like gay marriage, European style paid vacation laws, or even the convenience of being friendly to your neighbors, look at what happened this week when Mississippi pulled the classic book “To Kill A Mockingbird” because – get this – it made people uncomfortable!

“If ‘To Kill a Mockingbird’ makes you uncomfortable, you should probably be reading ‘To Kill a Mockingbird.’”

The public school district in Biloxi, Mississippi, scrubbed the 1960 novel from its 8th grade curriculum last week, saying there had been “complaints” about the book’s “language.” The move continues a tradition dating back decades of American schools censoring Harper Lee’s Pulitzer-winning classic.

“There is some language in the book that makes people uncomfortable, and we can teach the same lesson with other books,” Kenny Holloway, vice president of the Biloxi School Board, told the Biloxi Sun Herald of the “Mockingbird” decision. “It’s still in our library. But they’re going to use another book in the 8th grade course.”
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/biloxi-to-kill-a-mockingbird_us_59e4974ce4b03a7be581e2a8?ncid=inblnkushpmg00000009

And finally if you need any further proof this nation couldn’t be any more insane, why is it that when white nationalist and guy who fantasizes about being Doug Neidermayer in Animal House, Richard Spencer, draws end of the world like controversy wherever he goes?

TALLAHASSEE, Fla. (AP) — Citing past clashes and protests, Florida Gov. Rick Scott on Monday declared a state of emergency in advance of a speech white nationalist Richard Spencer is scheduled to give at the University of Florida.

The state's Republican governor warned in an executive order Monday that a "threat of a potential emergency is imminent" in Alachua County, in north Florida. Spencer is slated to speak at the campus on Thursday and his pending appearance has already sparked protests in the university town.

Spencer participated in a white nationalist rally in Charlottesville, Virginia, that led to deadly violence in August.

Scott's executive order will allow local law-enforcement authorities to partner with state and other law-enforcement agencies to provide security for the event. The university has already said it expects to spend $500,000 on security.

Read more: http://www.chron.com/news/education/article/Florida-state-of-emergency-declared-for-white-12281781.php

And in case you’re wondering if the cult-like mentality of the MAGATs couldn’t be any crazier, I give you this guy out of Philadelphia – who got kicked out of a bar for being drunk and unruly while wearing a MAGA hat, and sued the bar on… anyone? Religious grounds! Yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A Philadelphia accountant who is taking a West Village bar to court for banning his Make America Great Again hat now claims he is part of a “protected class” because believing in the Trump slogan amounts to a religion.
According to the Gothamist, 30-year-old Greg Piatek has amended his lawsuit against The Happiest Hour for banning him over his hat, saying he was “adhering to his closely held spiritual beliefs by adorning the hat in question.”
Piatek previously explained that he was wearing the hat as a ““spiritual tribute” to the victims of the 9/11 attack back in 2001, but now says that he sees the MAGA slogan — popularized as a campaign slogan by President Donald Trump — as a religious creed.
“At the time [Piatek] wore his hat, the election of President Trump was over and therefore [he] had no reason to wear the hat for any political purpose,” attorney Liggieri argued. “Rather, [he] wore his hat to pay tribute to the fallen heroes and victims of Sept. 11, 2011.”
https://www.rawstory.com/2017/10/im-a-protected-class-trump-fan-suing-new-york-bar-for-banning-his-maga-hat-claims-religious-discrimination/

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[font size="8"]Newt Gingrich
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It’s time once again to ask:



This week: Newt Gingrich’s career. How is this still a thing? You remember Newt Gingrich – the classy, thrice divorced individual who led Bill Clinton’s impeachment trial back in the 90s? There’s two sure things – the Patriots will beat your team, and Newt Gingrich will get a divorce. The man got divorced to his wife who had cancer. That’s classy! So why is he still a thing? Why wont he go away? Well in the age of republican celebrity – if you’re in their club you’re in it for life. But if you’re on their shit list, you’re in it for life!

Newt Gingrich says he has no doubt that Donald Trump was the better choice for U.S. president.

Gingrich, a Trump confidant, and the U.S. House Speaker from 1995 to 1999 who sought the Republican presidential nomination in 2012, says Trump is "a stunningly effective president."

The CBC's Wendy Mesley interviewed Gingrich in Toronto, ahead of his appearance at a public debate at the University of Toronto.

"What he is doing to shake up Washington is what America needs," Gingrich tells Mesley.

Read more: http://www.cbc.ca/news/world/newt-gingrich-wendy-mesley-1.4352829

Yes – at one point Newt Gingrich advocated for a base on the moon. He must be smoking some good Covfefe. Even more so if he thinks Trump is an effective president! While the whole world is watching in sheer horror of Trump’s new policy on Iran, Gingrich? Well that’s just fine and dandy!

When the Iranian parliament chanted “death to America" while unanimously voting "to increase spending on its ballistic missile program and the foreign operations of its paramilitary Revolutionary Guard," sophisticated diplomats may have pondered the symbolic meaning of "death to America."

After all, our wisest and most sophisticated analysts have reassured us, it couldn't literally mean "death to America." The New York Times has been on a campaign to convince Americans the phrase has lost its original meaning.

Here are examples from 2013, 2014, 2015, and 2017.

The same analysts reassure us that when senior Hamas leaders are quoted saying "not a single Jew will remain" in Israel, they are really communicating symbolically.
http://www.foxnews.com/opinion/2017/10/15/newt-gingrich-death-to-america-why-trumps-iran-policy-is-right.html

Yes why? They would reduce the entire middle east to rubble if they knew they could get away with it, but you know, international treaties and such. But here’s how Newt Gingrich’s career is still a thing – he loves Trump and he’s on Fox News practically 24 hours a day. Fox News – that channel your racist uncle yells at during Thanksgiving dinner, and reminds you why you only visit once a year.

Former House Speaker Newt Gingrich says the Washington, D.C., establishment is enraged with President Trump because he is following through on his promise to "drain the swamp."

"Donald Trump really is draining the swamp, and the alligators are really unhappy," Gingrich told John Catsimatidis on AM970's "The Answer." "This guy is actually doing what he said he would do: We're getting conservative judges nominated. We are getting regulations rolled back."

"We're getting a much more aggressive pro-American trade policy and pro-American foreign policy," Gingrich said. "The other side sees this as the end of their way of life."
http://thehill.com/homenews/sunday-talk-shows/355478-gingrich-the-alligators-are-really-unhappy-that-trump-is-draining

So how is Trump draining the swamp exactly? You can’t drain the swamp if you keep reusing the same water and the drain is clogged to begin with. Time to call Roto Rooter! But this isn’t the only reason why Newt Gingrich’s career is still a thing. He’s popular with old, white males. You know – of the Clint Eastwood “Get off my lawn” variety.

SAN FRANCISCO — Newt Gingrich knows who's to blame for America's divisions: text-loving millennials.

The younger generation's preference to send text messages rather than talk on the phone is an indication of the group's inability to talk to people who are different from them, Gingrich said Tuesday during an appearance here at OpenWorld, Oracle's annual user conference.

"You have to wonder at what point have you grown a generation that cannot interact with anyone else," he said.

Gingrich's comments came during a sit-down conversation with former Senator Barbara Boxer before an audience of corporate executives that was moderated by Oracle's co-CEO Mark Hurd.

The former Speaker of the House and former Republican representative from Georgia started targeting millennials after Boxer, a Democrat, said President Donald Trump rhetoric was dividing the country. Boxer described reading through Trump's inaugural address and discovering what she referred to as "the politics of them." Trump's address included many references to "you" and "them," juxtaposing politics under President Obama with how things would play out in the Trump administration.
http://www.businessinsider.com/newt-gingrich-americas-divided-because-millennials-text-too-much-2017-10

Yes – Newt Gingrich ventured into “Get Off My Lawn” territory. But Newt always gives conservatives the ol’ assist! In fact he’s widely credited with not only breaking Congress, he totally destroyed it to the point where a Ctrl-Alt-Delete simply won’t cut it.

In 1978, E.J. Dionne Jr. was a young reporter covering New York state politics in Albany. That same year, a young historian from Georgia finally won a seat in the House of Representatives, after two failed attempts. His name was Newt Gingrich.

Gingrich’s victory could be attributed to his newly combative style, which he’d revealed at a speech before a group of College Republicans in Atlanta the summer before his electoral victory. “I think that one of the great problems we have in the Republican Party is that we don't encourage you to be nasty,” Gingrich told the young conservatives gathered at the Holiday Inn. “We encourage you to be neat, obedient and loyal and faithful and all those Boy Scout words, which would be great around the campfire, but are lousy in politics.”

Nearly 40 years later, Dionne is a columnist for The Washington Post, while Gingrich is a TV pundit and lobbyist, having left public service after serving as the speaker of the House. As far as Dionne is concerned, Gingrich defined his legacy—and that of the Republican Party as currently constituted—with the brand of incivility and intransigence he introduced in that 1978 speech. It is the blustery Georgian who helped Congress reach the approval rating it has today: 16 percent.
http://www.newsweek.com/congress-gingrich-hastert-681653

Yup there it is – Gingrich is not only insane, he’s batshit fucking off the rails crazy. And he’s the guy who can be credited with breaking Congress. That’s enough to make you ask: Newt Gingrich’s career:




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[font size="8"]Mike Pence
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OK everyone is saying “what’s going to happen to Trump?”. The guy is *CLEARLY* off his fucking rocker. And he has gone mad with power. It’s only going to be a matter of time before he goes down. He is the single most dangerous president the world has ever seen. Except of course for the guy who sits in the corner on a voluntary time out, Mike “All Work And No Play Makes Jack A Dull Boy” Pence. Yes, because this week, Trump was caught saying this:

President Trump once joked that Vice President Mike Pence “wants to hang” all gay people, The New Yorker reported Monday.

The publication all reports that Trump has mocked Pence for his views opposing abortion and LGBTQ rights.Trump jabbed at Pence after a legal scholar told the pair that if the Supreme Court overturned Roe v. Wade, many states would probably legalize abortion.

“You see?” Trump reportedly said to Pence. “You’ve wasted all this time and energy on it, and it’s not going to end abortion anyway.” And when the meeting began to focus on gay rights, Trump reportedly pointed to Pence, joking, “Don’t ask that guy — he wants to hang them all!”

One Trump campaign staffer also told The New Yorker that Trump used to ask people leaving meetings with Pence, “Did Mike make you pray?"

One source said the president likes to "let Pence know who's boss," according to the report.
http://thehill.com/homenews/administration/355594-trump-joked-that-pence-wants-to-hang-all-gay-people-report

Yeah BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! Holy fuck! I mean really – what would a dick do? You don’t joke about the other guy wanting to commit genocide in front of people! Although in all fairness, Trump did admit what we suspect the Values Voters are secretly thinking. I mean if you want any further proof that Pence is a Koch stooge, there’s this.

The power struggle between populist hardliners and moderate generals in the Trump White House is well documented. Vice President Mike Pence has largely stayed out of the drama, while quietly becoming one of the most powerful people in the Trump administration, according to a new profile of Pence from the New Yorker’s Jane Mayer.

Mayer’s piece shows that behind the scenes, the vice president has made a huge mark on President Trump’s policy agenda, while putting himself in a good position for his own presidential ambitions. Mayer writes that Pence’s influence has shaped White House policies far more than that of other important members of the administration, including Breitbart executive chair Steve Bannon or Trump’s son-in-law Jared Kushner. In particular, Pence’s longstanding connection to libertarian megadonors Charles and David Koch — former political enemies of Trump — has helped shape the current White House.

Pence and Trump are two very different men. Pence is a devout evangelical who doesn’t dine alone with other women unless his wife is present. He made his name in conservative politics as a talk radio host and enacted hardline policies during his time as Indiana’s governor, mandating burials for fetuses and essentially allowing businesses to discriminate against gay people. Trump is a bombastic billionaire who famously bragged about groping women and publicly espoused pro-choice and pro-same-sex marriage views. Mayer’s piece includes moments where Trump mocked Pence’s socially conservative views and his tendency to pray in the White House.
https://www.vox.com/policy-and-politics/2017/10/16/16482746/kochs-mike-pence-trump-white-house

And by the way in case it couldn’t be more obvious how much of a Koch stooge Mike Pence is, I mean it really couldn’t be more obvious:

The power struggle between populist hardliners and moderate generals in the Trump White House is well documented. Vice President Mike Pence has largely stayed out of the drama, while quietly becoming one of the most powerful people in the Trump administration, according to a new profile of Pence from the New Yorker’s Jane Mayer.

Mayer’s piece shows that behind the scenes, the vice president has made a huge mark on President Trump’s policy agenda, while putting himself in a good position for his own presidential ambitions. Mayer writes that Pence’s influence has shaped White House policies far more than that of other important members of the administration, including Breitbart executive chair Steve Bannon or Trump’s son-in-law Jared Kushner. In particular, Pence’s longstanding connection to libertarian megadonors Charles and David Koch — former political enemies of Trump — has helped shape the current White House.

Pence and Trump are two very different men. Pence is a devout evangelical who doesn’t dine alone with other women unless his wife is present. He made his name in conservative politics as a talk radio host and enacted hardline policies during his time as Indiana’s governor, mandating burials for fetuses and essentially allowing businesses to discriminate against gay people. Trump is a bombastic billionaire who famously bragged about groping women and publicly espoused pro-choice and pro-same-sex marriage views. Mayer’s piece includes moments where Trump mocked Pence’s socially conservative views and his tendency to pray in the White House.
https://www.vox.com/policy-and-politics/2017/10/16/16482746/kochs-mike-pence-trump-white-house

Maybe Charles Koch is Emperor Palpatine. I mean if Trump is Darth Vader. But in case you didn’t get the Kochs’ radical agenda, they’re *STILL* touting this “clean coal” bullshit! That’s like eating a “healthy” chimichanga. A deep fried burrito is still a fucking deep fried burrito!

In Virginia’s oddly timed elections for governor, held a year after presidential contests, history has repeated itself: The winning candidate lately has represented the opposite party as the newly elected president.

In 2009, Republican Bob McDonnell’s election followed President Obama’s seizure of the White House for Democrats. Eight years earlier, Democrat Mark R. Warner was elected governor after Republican George W. Bush’s presidential election.

That has added a sense of historical imperative to Republican efforts here, particularly since this year’s Republican candidate, Ed Gillespie, has trailed Democrat Ralph Northam in early polls.

So it fell to Vice President Mike Pence on Saturday to try to rev up Republican enthusiasm in this coal country section of Virginia. It is a place similar to those that helped Trump win states like Pennsylvania and Ohio last year, although he fell short in Virginia.
http://www.latimes.com/politics/la-na-pol-pence-virginia-governor-20171014-story.html

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[font size="8"]Lindsay Lohan
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Let me ask you this – my fair Top 10 fans! Why is Lindsay Lohan always on the wrong side of everything? I do mean always! She famously went to Russia last year (which we covered in Idiots #40 ). She is not shy to admit her love of Vladimir Putin and she’s even dated Russian elite. Now… all the news has surfaced about Lindsay Lohan defending human piece of garbage Harvey Weinstein. We might need the sad Hulk music for this one.

&list=RDQM_7oqpQzdRe4

Lindsay Lohan shared a Instagram story video saying she supported Weinstein after several women made allegations of sexual misconduct against him in stories published in the New York Times and The New Yorker.

While she deleted the video less than an hour after posting it in the early hours of Wednesday morning local time in the UAE time – where she is currently located – social media users were quick to record and share.

“Hi, this is Lindsay Lohan, I’m in Dubai. I’m home,” she said in her now more European accent. “I feel very bad for Harvey Weinstein right now. I don’t think it’s right what’s going on.”
http://www.people.com/movies/lindsay-lohan-defends-harvey-weinstein/

Really? You can’t understand why Harvey Weinstein is such a human piece of shit? Really? And then she tried to clear up what she said – and failed:

In case you missed it, Lindsay Lohan fired up her Instagram Stories earlier this week to share a series of bizarre posts about producer Harvey Weinstein.

Responding to the numerous reports detailing decades of alleged sexual misconduct by the producer, Lohan said she was "feeling bad" for Weinstein and chastised his estranged wife, Georgina Chapman, for announcing that she was leaving him.

"He's never harmed me or did anything to me—we've done several movies together," Lohan said. "I think everyone needs to stop—I think it's wrong. So stand up."

The posts were ultimately deleted, but this is 2017—anything you do or say on the Internet lives forever.
https://www.glamour.com/story/lindsay-lohan-clarified-comments-defending-harvey-weinstein

Oh come on – you know you failed when Sly does it! But then it gets weird – Lindsay isn’t the only celebrity speaking out *FOR* Weinstein’s disgusting behavior:

As we ride out yet another nauseating wave of revelations about sexual predators in Hollywood, we're also getting outrage from the very industry that enabled their abuse.

Many of the predictable, strongly-worded, flack-approved condemnations from Hollywood elites about their shock, dismay, and (alleged) ignorance of Harvey Weinstein's behavior sounds well-meaning.

But look more closely—at the subtle hedging in their language, at the protective coats of phrasing. And you'll quickly see how some of these people just don't get it. Or, even worse, are making condemnations that slyly deflect any would-be charges of accountability for why this keeps happening. So many people knew. Can every person who condemned Weinstein openly this week not have known?

Yeah, right.

Well-meaning statements don't mean much, ultimately, when the people making them keep demonstrating complicit behavior—the same kind that got us here. As if that's not bad enough, so many of these people are focusing on their own traumatic feelings about someone else's horror. Or they dole out justifications for why they're just so much more woke to why sexually assaulting women is bad (I have daughters! I love my mom!).
http://mashable.com/2017/10/12/harvey-weinstein-celebrity-responses-gross/#qRyKJZo0FSqc

And there’s other celebrities out there who are speaking out in favor of this piece of shit. I mean when Woody Allen is on your side, you don’t want to be right!

The small but vocal group of Hollywood celebrities who initially defended movie mogul Harvey Weinstein amid sexual harassment accusations and rape allegations has been forced to walk back its praise in the face of overwhelming social media backlash.

Oscar-winning director Oliver Stone, actress Lindsay Lohan, actor Tony Denison, fashion designer Donna Karan and director Woody Allen rose to Weinstein’s defense despite a tidal wave of industry condemnation.

The scandal was sparked by a New York Times investigation that chronicled a history of sexual harassment accusations against Weinstein. The New Yorker followed with an investigative report in which three women accused Weinstein of rape.

Since then, the Hollywood titan has been fired by his namesake entertainment company, and multiple Hollywood actresses have come forward with additional allegations of sexual harassment by Weinstein.
http://www.latimes.com/entertainment/movies/la-et-mn-harvey-weinstein-defenders-20171013-story.html

By the way fuck you Fox News – how dare you turn this horrid story into a Clinton bashing story! Your guy won the election! Get the fuck over it and stop spreading bullshit! It’s bad for you!

Somehow, the Harvey Weinstein story became a Hillary Clinton story.

Clinton, who received campaign donations from the Hollywood mogul and attended fundraisers hosted by him, was criticized for saying nothing in the days after the New York Times published an account accusing Weinstein of repeated sexual assault and harassment. And then when she did say something, she was accused of not saying enough.

Weinstein has long been associated with Democratic and liberal politics, hosting fundraisers for Clinton and Barack Obama (also called on to release a statement of condemnation); donating $300,000 to the Democratic National Committee, and more to individual legislators; and publicly championing women’s rights. In the days since the Times’s account (and subsequent revelations in the New Yorker), any progressive or Democratic institution that’s been associated with Weinstein has been expected to cut itself loose quickly, entirely, and permanently. And any Hollywood figure who’s expressed progressive opinions has been expected to do the same.
https://www.vox.com/identities/2017/10/17/16482604/weinstein-clinton-ailes-trump

See? Even Trump doesn’t care! So shut the fuck up! And back to Lindsay Lohan here’s where it gets weird – her dad is apparently defending her comments defending Harvey Weinstein. Is this some sort of weird Inception world I don’t know about?

Hollywood mogul Harvey Weinstein had been under the scanner for over a few days now and he has been bombarded by accusations from various quarters for his inappropriate behavior and the entire movie industry has come down heavily on him.

But there is one person who has not spoken ill of him and has defended him and she is actress Lindsay Lohan.The 31-year-old actress took to Instagram claiming that Weinstein never misbehaved with her and that everyone should give him a break.
http://www.enstarz.com/articles/197343/20171015/lindsay-lohan-defends-harvey-weinstein-dad-stands-for-her.htm

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[font size="8"]Rick & Morty Szechwan Sauce Craze
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Now it’s time for another installment of:



And man do I need a drink this week – and we haven’t even got to the latest installment of our World Tour yet! I’ll take a Bloody Mary topped with chicken nuggets thanks! Yeah I want it spicy. And a side of Szechwan Sauce from McDonalds. Sigh…………………… really people? This is what we’ve come to? Fucking Chicken McNugget sauce? No wonder we can’t have nice things. Of course I’m talking about the TV show Rick & Morty and the Szechwan Sauce craze that it’s caused. Here’s more.

On its face, it sounded so simple

McDonald's executives must have thought they were reaching for low-hanging fruit when they decided to court the fandom of a show that's ousted "The Big Bang Theory" as the top-rated comedy among Millennials in the U.S.

The company has been pushing a new product: a line of chicken tenders that taste more like something you'd get from the Safeway deli than a fast food establishment. And capitalizing on an obscure reference to the fast food chain's nearly 20-year-old Szechuan sauce during the third-season premiere of "Rick and Morty" must have seemed like a sure thing.

But a publicity stunt meant to push a few thousand chicken tenders quickly devolved into outrageous shenanigans and mob-like stampedes committed by the most obnoxious of "Rick and Morty" fans. And McDonald's employees paid the steepest price.

Minimum-wage workers across the country had to put up with this:
http://www.oregonlive.com/trending/2017/10/mcdonalds_employees_victims_in_rick_and_morty_szechuan_sauce_fiasco.html

Ooh I like that one! Yes, there was once a long discontinued sauce from McDonalds that was used to promote Disney’s 1996 film Mulan. But now it’s back and in a way that nobody had ever thought before, and it’s causing people to do insane things.

After McDonald’s disastrous attempt to provide Rick and Morty fans with packets of Szechuan sauce, eBay sellers are coming up with creative ways to get in on the frenzy.

Multiple eBay sellers are offering framed photos of the McDonald’s Szechuan sauce packet. One seller in particular, kevigmh_thjqe, has sold almost 20 photos in their accompanying frames. The photos aren’t of high quality or particularly pleasing to the eye; they’re printed on normal paper with a HP DeskJet 2600. In them, the sauce container is sitting on a wooden table or floor.
https://www.polygon.com/2017/10/10/16454458/szechuan-sauce-ebay-rick-and-morty

So would you be surprised to learn that McDonalds botched their Rick & Morty sauce promotion? Gee we aren’t either! Especially when it has caused this kind of epic insanity – you know – the kind of thing we love here!

Justin Roiland, the co-creator of Adult Swim's smash hit "Rick and Morty," told The Washington Post this summer, only partly in jest, that while writing the show, he has feared angering its millions of hardcore fans.

Perhaps McDonald's should take the cue, because on Saturday, the burger chain managed to do just that.

In April, Roiland expressed his nostalgic love for McDonald's limited Szechuan sauce - a promotional tie-in during the 1998 release of Disney's "Mulan" - by incorporating it into a "Rick and Morty" plotline. In response, the fast-food titan sent the Cartoon Network creator/voice actor an industrial-size bottle.

After Roiland tweeted images of the mailed dipping sauce over the summer, fans of "Rick and Morty" - aka the No. 1 show among millennials - continued to grow a mass hankering for the Szechuan goodness. A Change.org petition to bring back the sauce drew about 45,000 supporters.
http://www.dailyherald.com/entlife/20171010/mcdonalds-botched-its-rick-and-morty-szechuan-sauce-stunt-fans-are-not-happy

https://images.moviepilot.com/images/c_limit,q_auto,w_710/padjmlmmzqibquom6gly/the-best-rick-morty-memes-can-replace-all-your-conversations.jpg

Yeah it’s getting weird all right! I mean who would waste $100s of dollars for a packet of McNugget sauce? It’s no wonder we’re all going to hell. And then there was this – yeah. This.

The day’s events do seem to have at least one winner, though: Michigan resident Rachel Marie, who apparently managed to trade a rare packet of the Szechuan sauce for an actual, working car. According to The Drive, Marie originally went on Facebook with her prize, looking to offload it in exchange for some collectible pins; instead, some sauce-loving maniac offered her a 2004 Volkswagen GTI. Faster than you can say, “Oh god, Rick would hate this,” she snatched up the trade, netting a new used car, while the car’s former owner got the warm satisfaction of knowing they’ve now become a new milestone in the fields of obsessive, potentially toxic fandom. (Meanwhile, McDonald’s has said it’s bringing the sauce back, some time soon, so all the food-goo profiteers out there had better be sure to prepare their garage or driveway for all the new wheels they’ll certainly soon be bringing home.)
https://www.avclub.com/woman-trades-a-packet-of-the-rick-and-morty-szechuan-sa-1819424702

Yeah that’s right – someone was that desperate for a packet of McNugget sauce that they traded a car for it! Where’s that drink? Excuse me a minute…




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[font size="8"]World Tour Destination #18: South Korea
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Part of our mission statement here at the Top 10 Conservative Idiots is to show you that conservative idiocy isn’t just a problem with America. No, it’s a global problem that is stemming far and wide, and it’s not just America where conservative idiots ruin everything they touch. And if you’re thinking of moving out of the United States just because Donald J. Trump is our current president and our nation is turning to shit, you should know what it is you’re getting into should you decide that you want to leave the country. So if you want a recap of where we’ve been so far, in the last few weeks we’ve discovered that New York has a gambling problem, my home state of California has a Russia problem, and Japan might be the catalyst for nuclear armageddon. Here’s the tour schedule:



[font size="6"]South Korea[/font]



We need some music for this one!

Yeah Gangnam Style isn’t the only thing that is culturally significant about South Korea! We are hanging out in Seoul this week everybody! South Korea is an interesting country. It’s the home of Samsung and LG where 95% of your home electronics come from. They’re also responsible for that smoldering hole in your kitchen where your Samsung Galaxy Note 7 used to be. But South Korea is interesting in that you can see large, sprawling ,ultra modern cities like Seoul and Busan, as famously seen in the most recent zombie movie “Train To Busan”.

I think if you go to Busan now the trains wont look anything like that movie. But what I’m getting at is in South Korea you can see ultra modern as well as ancient. South Korea is also the home of Korean BBQ – you know that place you went with your cousin and got 3rd degree burns on the grill because you don’t know how to use a grill. I kid, I kid. South Korea is also the home of Incheon. One of the single largest airports in the entire world. It’s of course also the southern neighbors to one of the most insane countries in the entire world – North Korea. Because of that there is also the area between the borders of North Korea and South Korea called the “De-Militarized Zone”. But what else is South Korea the home of? Well a huge hacking problem for starters!

Washington (CNN)North Korean hackers allegedly stole classified military documents from a South Korean Defense Ministry database in September 2016, according to Rhee Cheol-hee, a member of South Korea's National Assembly.
Rhee, who belongs to the ruling Democratic Party and sits on the Defense Committee, told CNN on Tuesday that he received information about the alleged hacking from the Defense Ministry.
He said the documents stolen included the South Korea-US wartime operational plan and a document that includes procedures to "decapitate" the North Korean leadership.

About 235 gigabytes worth of military data was stolen by the hackers, Rhee said.
http://www.cnn.com/2017/10/10/politics/north-korea-hackers-us-south-korea-war-plan/index.html

Yeah so holy fuck! Note to self: do not make fun of North Korean hackers ever again! What do you mean they already hacked me? Damn it!!! South Korea is also the home of what could quite possibly be Trump’s most insane stunt to date:

Donald Trump could next month be standing just metres from Kim Jong-un’s gun-toting soldiers during a possible visit to the heavily-fortified Demilitarized Zone between North and South Korea.

Officials from Washington have reportedly visited the tense border area between the two countries – who remain technically at war – as they draw up detailed plans for the US president’s upcoming visit to South Korea.

Mr Trump is heading to the South as part of a tour of Asia when he is expected to deliver a strong message to Pyongyang over its build up of nuclear weapons.

An anonymous South Korean defence official told Yonhap news agency that an advance team of US officials “looked around Panmunjom and Observation Post Ouellette.”
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2017/10/10/donald-trump-may-visit-heavily-armed-border-area-north-south/

I mean yeah… we’re probably all going to die. Forget the “Train To Busan” – this is the Train To Nuke Busan! Holy shit!!! And by the way let’s take a look at how Trump’s little nuclear war games might be planning out for the world’s economy:

South Korea’s bonds may have weathered missile tests and the specter of a nuclear attack but a new danger threatens to stem inflows.

Annual inflation in Asia’s fourth-largest economy accelerated to the fastest in more than five years in August, sapping returns from fixed-income payments. JPMorgan Asset Management rates South Korean debt last among Asian emerging-market government bonds, while Manulife Asset Management is underweight as rising global yields reduce their relative appeal.

“Korea is one of the few Asian regions where inflation is above expectation, while the growth outlook is also on the strong side,” said Gregory Suen, investment director of fixed income at HSBC Global Asset Management, which oversees $447 billion globally. “We are relatively more bullish on India, Indonesia and Thailand. All three markets have low or lowering inflation expectations, which is supportive of bond prices.”
https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2017-10-12/inflation-joins-missile-threat-as-korean-bonds-fall-out-of-favor

We’re not in Armageddon yet. But there’s much more to this insane story that we haven’t been able to do a deep dive in just yet. And well, thanks to Donald Trump, North Korea has escalated its’ threat to send a nice warm greeting of nuclear weapons to Guam:

SEOUL, South Korea — As the United States and South Korea prepared for next week’s joint naval exercise, North Korean officials on Friday renewed their threat to launch ballistic missiles near Guam, an American territory in the western Pacific.

The drill, which involves the aircraft carrier Ronald Reagan, is scheduled to begin on Monday in waters east and west of South Korea. The 10-day exercise will check the allies’ “communications, interoperability and partnership,” the United States Navy’s 7th Fleet said in a statement.

The nuclear-powered submarine Michigan arrived at the South Korean port of Busan on Friday. American and South Korean warplanes will also join the exercise, which takes place amid heightened tensions over North Korea’s advancing nuclear missile program.
https://www.nytimes.com/2017/10/13/world/asia/north-korea-renews-guam-threat-ahead-of-joint-naval-exercise.html

And that’s how they all died. But guess what? The US is so eager to start a new war that they actually say they could fight tonight if they wanted to! You know what? Let’s talk about something much lighter for the rest of this entry. In fact 15 pages of Google searching for articles about South Korea was about nothing but our forthcoming annihilation. So that said let’s talk about pirates! Everybody loves pirates don’t they? Ha ha ha ha ha ha?

A member of parliament from the Pirate Party in Iceland was forced to wear an eyepatch for a television appearance following a bizarre household accident.

Eva Pandora Baldursdottir wrote on her Facebook wall that her one-year-old daughter "scratched my eye, which means I have to wear an eyepatch over the weekend," Reykjavik Grapevine reports.

"That wouldn't be an issue if it wasn't for the fact that I'm going to a TV debate tonight," she said.

"Of course be wearing my beautiful eyepatch," she said of her impending appearance on Iceland's Stod 2 channel.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/blogs-news-from-elsewhere-41608341

[font size="6"]The Verdict & Scorecard[/font]

Yeah this was a tough one. The people of South Korea are nice. And it’s a friendly place to visit. But if you want to live here, I would suggest looking elsewhere!

Tourism: A
Culture: A
Political Spectrum: F
Liberal Appeal: D

Overall: C-

[font size="6"]Next Week[/font]

Ooh this is going to be a fun one – we’re heading to a country that Trump has a love – hate relationship with. We’re visiting the land of the Great Wall and Tiananmen Square – China! Or as he calls it “Gina”!



[font size="8"]And Now This:[/font]
[font size="8"]BTS[/font]

Folks in the spirit of South Korea, my next guest is one of Korea’s biggest touring acts. They even did a show in my home venue of Honda Center! Their latest album is called “Love Yourself”, playing their song called “DNA”, give it up for BTS!

Yeah how about that?

See you next week! If we still live through this week that is!

Credits

Host: Initech
Top 10 Conservative Idiots Recorded In Front Of Live Audience At: Laugh Factory, Long Beach, CA
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Writing: Top 10 Writing Department
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Initech Productions: Yes, We Got The Memo