Im 58 years old...

[brooklynite]

Most of my close friends are women. I’ve never made a pass at any of them, said something suggestive or even told a dirty joke.
Is it really so hard?

[Guilded Lilly]

1. Not for someone with character, grace and class! :)

[whathehell]

2. + 1000

Thanks, Brooklynite.

[Scarsdale]

3. I think you have

lots of company. Not all men are creeps. Seems that the gop has an overabundance of them, though doesn't it? I worked for 25 years at a company with lots of men. Only a couple were offenders, the majority were NORMAL, sensible males.

[aikoaiko]

4. Not that its wrong to attempt to take a friendship to the next level, but it isn't difficult...

... to respect boundaries or not harass individuals.

[rurallib]

5. I'm with you

I have a lot of friends that are women. I treat them just like I want to be treated - with respect and dignity and as a fellow human.

[Hoyt]

6. +1. Same here. I even had a stripper co-worker pay me a compliment once.

In my early 30s, my office had a young lady administrative assistant who also worked part-time as a stripper. I suspect she did quite well in tips.

Anyway, the office was out drinking one Friday night and she needed a ride home. All the guys, who had been joking suggestively with her -- and God knows what else -- all evening, jumped up to volunteer, again suggestively.

She said, "Nope, if Hoyt will, I'd rather he drive me home -- he's a gentleman." I drove her home, said good night, made sure she got in safely, and got laughed at the next day by the creeps in the office for being a "gentleman."

[madaboutharry]

7. I was thinking about the many men I have known

who would never behave inappropriately around women. Then there are those who were creepy. I think it is a matter of who you are.

[TBA]

8. I dated a guy once who worked in an all-male tech shop. He shared many conversations

he overheard while working.

He often said homophobic men were afraid of gay men because they feared being treated and thought about the way they themselves treated and thought about women.

Boy did this guy open my eyes.

I hate to say it, but my default position is to distrust men.

[chervilant]

15. After a lifetime

of abuse at the hands of men I should have been able to trust -- some family members, all sexually or physically inappropriate -- I still learn about new 'red flags' every time I navigate the turbid waters of male/female interaction.

We must have each others' backs. We must work together to eradicate patriarchy and all of its stultifying offspring.

I'm in the Crone stage of my life, and have chanced upon an amazing man, almost nine years my junior, who is an interesting mix of enlightened feminism and old-school sexism. What I love the most about him is his willingness to examine and reject the sexism inculcated in him (in ALL of us) by the pernicious patriarchy which is our global socio-cultural milieu.

If he can do it, so can every other man on this planet...

[mcar]

9. Right?

WTF is wrong with these men? It's 20fricking17 and women still have to deal with this crap?

Halperin "now realizes" grabbing women's breasts is wrong? No wonder the Dotard "won."

[treestar]

10. I am that age

and have had many male friends who never would do such a thing.

Hopefully it is getting better over the long run. In general the younger the man, the less likely he is to treat women unequally.

[MineralMan]

12. Not hard at all. I'm 72, and have many friends who are women.

They're just friends, not sexual partners, so there's none of that going on.

[unblock]

13. it's not hard for most men, but celebrity and power can corrupt

people who meet with success can get a feeling like they are entitled, blessed, or can get away with it.

again, most people have enough of a sense of decorum, propriety, ethics, consideration, or at a minimum, law-abiding behavior to keep things proper.

but 5-10% of any population are *ssholes, and they're the ones who make the headlines....


and yeah, it's not hard. for me, it just plain doesn't even occur to me to do a fraction of what some of these people actually do. even if i were enough of a jerk to actually do that, i have to think my career and marriage would come crashing down on me in an instant.

how is a quick grope or whatever remotely worth that?

anyway, the people who do this aren't thinking with the big brain....

[raccoon]

14. iME it apparently is for many men. Nt

[HopeAgain]

16. Not hard at all

When I got married 32 years ago, I was told to always act as if my wife was looking over my shoulder.

It was not meant to be a discouragement from acting improperly to avoid getting in trouble, but rather to highlight that we do know what is right or wrong when interacting with the opposite sex.

[brush]

17. Put me on the "not hard to do" list also.

1. Treat all with kindness and respect.

2. If you're married other women should be off limits anyway.

3. If you're single and in any way perceptive, you learn that if a woman is interested subtle signals will come you way. If not, repeat number 1.