Pete Buttigieg announces he and husband will be parents

[riversedge]

Source: POLITICO





The Transportation secretary said he and Chasten Buttigieg are “overjoyed,” even though the process isn’t done yet.

By NICK NIEDZWIADEK 08/17/2021 02:21 PM EDT

Transportation Secretary Pete Buttigieg announced on Tuesday that he and his husband are expectant parents.

“For some time, Chasten and I have wanted to grow our family,” Buttigieg, the first openly gay Cabinet secretary, wrote on Twitter. “We’re overjoyed to share that we’ve become parents! The process isn’t done yet and we’re thankful for the love, support, and respect for our privacy that has been offered to us.”

No details were available about their avenue to parenthood, but the Buttigiegs have been open about their difficulties trying to adopt a child as a married couple. In a July profile of Chasten Buttigieg, The Washington Post reported that the two had been trying to do so for more than a year, even going so far as “on multiple occasions, to shop for baby gear and discuss names,” but to no avail.

“It’s a really weird cycle of anger and frustration and hope,” he told the paper. “You think it’s finally happening and you get so excited, and then it’s gone.”................................

Read more: https://www.politico.com/news/2021/08/17/transportation-sec-buttigieg-announces-adoption-plans-505613

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Sure am hoping their dream comes true

Link to tweet

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Pete Buttigieg and his husband Chasten Buttigieg wave during a campaign town hall event in Arlington, Va.

Pete Buttigieg and his husband Chasten Buttigieg wave during a campaign town hall event in Arlington, Va. | Alex Wong/Getty Images

[GPV]

1. Congrats to them!

[elleng]

2. ;-)

[Budi]

3. Wow. Imagine being the fortunate child who finds a home with such love.

Man, I sincerely wish all the best for them.

"There exists pure goodness "~

[Mike Nelson]

4. Great news!

... and, although "private" is a word in that statement, I can see how they are going to model this process for the public! Making it difficult for people to have children in this country has got to end.

[Irish_Dem]

5. I am so happy for them! Congratulations and best wishes to parents and baby.

[brer cat]

6. Such happy news!

I'm glad for them and that lucky baby.

[Ohio Joe]

7. Congrats!

[amuse bouche]

8. Wishing them the best. I love..love...love Pete

[Rastapopoulos]

9. Happy news!

[wendyb-NC]

10. Congratulations

Happy day, that's great news! Good for them. I think they will be great dad's to their future child and children. Best wishes to them, always.

[StevieM]

11. If the process isn't done yet then they are not parents yet and it is not certain that they will be.

The new mother has every right to make a decision to parent, which often does happen after the baby is born, even if an adoption has been planned out. She is not the birth mother until the papers are signed, and it is inappropriate to act as if she is.

[EndlessWire]

12. Wut?

What does, "She is not the birth mother until the papers are signed, and it is inappropriate to act as if she is" actually mean? Pete is a male gay with a male spouse. Are you using "she" as a pronoun substitute to refer to Chasten? It's confusing when you switch like that.

You know, it's only human to plan for a probable child. You do get attached. It is inappropriate? There would be something wrong with them if they didn't. That's why it hurts so much when the plans fall through. Good luck to them!

[StevieM]

13. I was referring to the child's mother.

"She" referred to the woman whose child Pete and Chasten are hoping to adopt.

My point is that it is coercive to refer to a pregnant woman or a new mom as a birth mother, even if an adoption plan has been formulated. It implies that she is somehow morally obligated to follow through with the plan or that she is already not the child's mother and is doing something wrong if she decides to keep her baby.

[EndlessWire]

14. Coercive??

How does "birth mother" imply that she is "morally obligated to follow through" with the plan? She has probably had all expenses paid. Do you feel "obligated" if you told someone that you were going to do something, that you planned to do something as life changing as presenting a child to a couple? I am sure that all involved are well aware of all the stakes. That's not coercive, to be aware of legal rights is one thing, but you have used the wrong word. Let those three people work it out without malice. It could be a good thing, without the stress of wondering what was going to happen to a baby that maybe you just can't keep. Let it be.

The only thing that matters in life is the creation of love bonds. Do you think that "birth mother" will not receive love and gratitude? That's quite an unchangeable title, anyway. How would you have them refer to her? We are at the human level. To be awaiting to become "parents" is also quite a title. It's none of our business, anyway. We don't even know if half the baby is one of them. We don't know if this is a surrogate mom. We know nothing except that Pete and partner are expecting. They shared that with us. They didn't have to include us.

[StevieM]

15. Yes, it is coercive. And it absolutely is my business.

Last edited Wed Aug 18, 2021, 06:48 PM - Edit history (1)

Pete and Chasten made it my business when they chose to make public statements on the matter. Actually, it is always our business to protect the rights of our fellow citizens.

By calling her a birth mother you are making the statement that she is already not the mother. You are saying that the child should be treated as Pete and Chasten's. And that implies that she is doing something wrong if she does not follow through. That is coercive.

The fact that she told them she was going to do something does not mean she has to do it, legally or morally. A woman cannot fully appreciate how she will feel until after the baby is born and she has actually become a mother to the child. Prospective adoptive parents must expect that there is a reasonable chance that the adoption they are hoping for will not reach completion.

The bond between a child and the mother who gives life to it is a special thing and it absolutely matters. That is a love bond that is there from the beginning and every effort should be made to preserve it. And becoming a birth mother is an enormous thing for a woman to have to accept. Gratitude cannot compare to the love that a mother shares with her child and the desire she has to nurture it.

I would have them refer to her as the child's mother. Because as of the time this announcement was made, that is exactly what she was. She was the baby's mom.

[EndlessWire]

16. I applaud thoughtful women

who make a plan long before they have to, and face the day about what is best for their child. You are nitpicking over something that is just semantics. Do you think for one second that Pete and Spouse don't know the meaning of all this? The article stated that they have been through this before.

It is looking more and more like you have an agenda, and I do not want to participate further. I am hoping that all three end up satisfied with the outcome. In a sea of incredibly dreadful news on all fronts, I am happy to share this happiness and wish them all well. And no, it is not your business. It absolutely is not ANY of your business.

Stay safe.